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Treat your child as your friend, and you can also talk to your child when you encounter unhappiness"Well, it's much more comfortable to say it, thank you for being a good listener for me. If you're unhappy, I can do the same, listeners"Then the child knows that this is also a way of emotional catharsis, if there are unhappy things, they will slowly tell you, and happy things should be shared with him. It's better to be happy alone than to be happy with all.
In addition, if you spend a lot of time with your child, you can actually find out when your child is happy, when he is unhappy, and why he is happy and why he is unhappy. In short, pay more attention to your children.
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Usually talk to your child like a friend, so that your child will be willing to talk to you if he has any ideas.
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It is necessary to gain the trust of children to lead them to speak out unpleasantly.
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Usually talk to your child and ask him when he is relaxed.
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The child may be scared to give the baby enough security.
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If your child were a friend, he would tell you everything.
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I think you can directly ask your child why he is unhappy and what happened to him, say it, and the mother will help you analyze what the reason is.
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You should usually be friends with him, so that he will talk to you about some unhappy things in your heart, and you will be regarded as a confidant.
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Make friends with your child sincerely, not only care about him in life, but also find the right time to talk to him.
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Communicate with him more, and usually care more about the child.
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Be enlightened slowly and pay attention to the process
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Talk. You have to show that you understand him.
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How old is the child? How can you tell he's unhappy? Can't it be that you like a melancholy temperament?
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Usually tell him if he is unhappy and say it, or you first say what happened to me today, and lead him to say.
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Ask your child directly what he has been happy about recently and what he is unhappy about.
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1. Be cautious about criticism Whether it is the child's fault or not, if you want the child to tell you what happened, attacking and criticizing is not the way to go. Also, don't jump to conclusions prematurely and wait for her to finish the story. After listening to her story, it is more important to induce them to discover the answer or solution to their own problems.
As children continue to mature, parents should go more and more behind the scenes and give their children the opportunity to think and solve problems on their own.
2. Create opportunities If you want to know more about your child's life, you need to create more opportunities for them to have activities with you without pressure. When you really need to ask questions, use less "why", a word that tends to inspire rebellion. "Kid, let's talk!
If your conversation starts like this, it often turns out that you're the only one talking. However, when you're playing basketball together, driving home, or doing laundry together on the weekend, it's often a time for kids to talk and chatter.
3. Controlling Reactions For example, even though your son is just as disappointed as he is when he tells you that he was not drafted for the varsity soccer team, you can't let that emotion show. Otherwise, it will cause him to only report good news and not bad news in the future. Consequence.
4. Choose the time 7 o'clock after dinner is the time when your child wants to tell you a lot of things, you may have a lot of bowls to brush, but you better stay at the table and listen patiently. Adults are always planning their next steps, while children are focused on the present and stick to their schedules.
5. Keep it a secret for him Imagine how your best friend would feel if she passed on the most secret thing you told her to someone else. The same goes for children, and this can be the quickest way you can lose trust.
6. Make up for it in time No matter how much we pay attention, there will always be times when we make mistakes, and it is extremely important to make amends. Be willing to put down the shelves and admit your mistakes to your child.
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Often in front of other people's parents, relatives and friends, they say that their children's test scores are useless, they are also lost in their work, they have no special skills, their writing is especially not good-looking, and their children have become unconfident.
can manage a lot, but also let the children who grow up form a rebellious mentality. You want to be casual, but what parents do not delegate, from what kind of clothes they wear, to what they say wrongly, all give their children a sense of lack of space for growth.
When the child tells his mother about what happened in school, his mother gets angry and tells you to pay attention to these things when you are studying, and use all your energy on studying, and don't talk about it later. There is no recognition and acceptance, only focusing on academic performance, not caring about the development of children, only widening the distance between children and parents, how to deal with it? In fact, parents who grasp a rare treasure have established a good parent-child relationship with their children, so that children want to communicate more with their parents.
This rare treasure is trust, the belief from the bottom of our hearts that children can become successful and become better, from every thought to the look and tone of voice. On the whole, gradually adjust the mentality from these small things, so that children can experience the trust of their parents.
Change the tone of voice so that your child creates the idea of communicating with the parents. When they can't get the trust of their parents, they will deliberately keep their distance from their parents, feeling that they don't believe in themselves anyway, so it's better not to talk and communicate less to prevent more disagreements. For example, when the parents' tone conveys the message that they firmly believe that the child can become better and better, the child will experience the warmth of family affection, for example, when the child's test results are lagging behind, the parents' encouragement, and there is no doubt that the child's unremitting efforts can impress the child, want to learn more consciously, and believe that he can be better.
Parents always like their children, but when the information is transmitted in the eyes, it is too useless, the child can observe it, don't think that the child has not seen the mother's eyes, the eyes of love are enough to bring the power of the child's self-confidence. If you don't even look down on your children as parents, and the words in your eyes are complaining, your children will be even less confident and have little motivation to grow. You have to pass on love before your parents can treat them well when they feel like a failure.
This trust can support him, on the road of growth, he is not worried about the wind and rain, and he is willing to break through himself heroically when he encounters tests.
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When the parent's tone conveys the message that the child can become better, the child will feel the warmth of the family, for example, when the child is lagging behind, the parents' encouragement and affirmation of the child's efforts are enough to move the child and be willing to study harder.
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Parents can communicate more with their children to build a sense of trust with their children, and they can get along with their children like friends.
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If you want to let the baby speak his own heart, we should pay more attention to the baby in ordinary life, and parents should also learn to use these methods, which can make the child's relationship more harmonious, first of all, we must learn to get along with the child in the way of friends, and do not criticize and accuse the child.
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If the child does not like to speak in his heart, he may not be good at expressing it, or it may be a problem with his parents' education, thinking that his parents do not care enough about him, and it is not very useful to say what he thinks. Parents should communicate more with their children, express their concern for their children, and can also tell their children what is in their hearts first, so that children will also talk to their parents in the future.
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Treat your child as a friend. Try to maximize opportunities to communicate with your child. Get closer to your child. Parents can take the initiative to talk to their children first, so that they will soon open up to you.
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The child's dislike to talk may be due to personality, which is a normal phenomenon, and parents should communicate patiently with their children.
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First, you should spend more time with your child so that he can build a sense of trust in you; Second, communicate with your child on an equal footing, don't talk to your child condescendingly, and try to understand your child's inner world.
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Parents should get along with their children on an equal footing, and each child is an independent individual, not an accessory of parents, so they must know how to respect their children, and children also have the right to speak.
Parents should get along with their children more and communicate more with their children, so that children will regard you as a friend and will naturally talk to you slowly.
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Don't let your child be afraid of you. Only if your child treats you as a good friend will he be willing to talk about his heart.
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