How can I not care so much about my girlfriend s daily life?

The only answer is to boost your own sense of security. Because the sense of control is a sense of security. The lower the sense of security, the greater the need for a sense of control.

In fact, each of us has a strong desire to control. It's just that most people will show it in a more subtle way, and it is not easy to notice. It takes time to improve your desire to control your girlfriend, and you want to get rid of your own problem of strong control for her, which has shown that you love her very much, and you can do it for her to get rid of your own problems for many years, which not everyone can do.

The most important thing is that you have to realize psychologically that the existence of this problem will cause you to have discord, and then you can slowly correct it. It's not that someone else can use the method you give, and if you can't accept such a thing psychologically, you definitely can't correct it.

It should be a typical "ambivalent-anxious" attachment relationship. Being too possessive is due to the interaction between the subject and your caregiver (mom) during childhood. It may be that the subject's caregiver is a relatively impatient person, and for some reason he or she always encourages or teaches the young subject to enter the stage of independence too early.

In adulthood, they will treat their feelings because of the memories of the formation of attachment relationships, and form a "pursuit personality". Maybe the subject will do everything he can to maintain an intimate relationship with his girlfriend. Because of the influence of infancy, the subject will be very afraid of being abandoned in his heart.

I want to be intimate with my girlfriend, but I'm afraid of scaring her away. For the pursuit personality, it is unbearable to come home from work and see that the lights are dark in the house, and to see that your spouse is not around in the morning. If you don't have the chance, you have to be clear:

Your possessiveness is trying to gain a little bit of security through an over-activation technique, which can easily cost you a lot. Because the act of excessive possession itself is to highlight one's pain to the extent that the girlfriend cannot ignore it. This constant demand for security can damage your self-esteem and trust in your girlfriend.

You are together to be happier, not because of the pain caused by mutual bonding, two people together, may not be the most compatible, but not because the other party loves you more, or you say that you care more about each other, you don't respect her, respect her mood, respect her choice, if she likes you to control her, then please continue, if she feels uncomfortable, please respect her, and stop.

Since your working hours are relatively not compact, you have enough time to control and possess each other, please ask, if you arrange your time properly every day, you will have so much spare time to think about whether to hover on the edge of controlling the other party. You spend too much time thinking about your wealth and leisure, and if you are busy, you will not think about controlling other people's lives all day long. Have you ever seen a successful person who indulges in these inner entanglements every day, if a person thinks about controlling the other person every day, he will not have time to succeed.

The fundamental reason is that I am not mature enough, my experience is shallow, I am not confident in myself and I don't trust my other half. I used to be like that. Filled with a sense of distrust of the other half.

How to solve it? Just be yourself. Give yourself more things to do and think less about her.

Try your best to improve yourself, do more exercise, read more books, work hard and waste less life. Love is not two people grabbing each other to cross a single-plank bridge, but a broad avenue that two people walk side by side together.

Any strong desire to control is based on selfish love, thinking that the other party should pay for themselves, how much they have paid for each other, then, corresponding to this article, respect each other, the other party is a complete individual, not your private toy, love each other must tolerate each other and respect each other.

As for the solution to the current situation, in fact, many of you understand it, but the subconscious mind will amplify your defense. And trying to improve is a long process. The quickest and most effective way at this stage is for you to go and play with your friends and do something else that interests you to distract you.

But this is only temporary, and it is difficult to solve the problem on your own.

First of all, you need to recognize that emotional history is a normal phenomenon, and we will only grow into more mature, macro-experienced people after many romantic and emotional experiences in our lives. Although some people may hold different values about emotional history, we should respect everyone's choices and life experiences, rather than being overly mindful and obsessed with the existence of emotional history.

Of course, if you really mind your girlfriend's emotional history, you can try to alleviate it by:

1.Be honest with your girlfriend: If you are very concerned about your girlfriend's emotional history, we can communicate openly with your girlfriend and communicate your thoughts and feelings with each other to reach a common understanding, so as to ease your worries and troubles.

2.Improve your emotional maturity: If you mind your girlfriend's emotional history, it can also be seen that you still have some deficiencies in emotional maturity, it is recommended to understand your emotional needs and emotional maturity, and try to pay attention to and think about your internal feelings and needs.

3.Adjusting and revising one's values: Having a deeper interpretation and thinking about things, and possibly adjusting one's own views and attitudes towards emotional history. Rational values may help you develop a more mature way of thinking.

Finally, emotional history is only a superficial phenomenon, and it cannot determine a person's worth and qualities. The important thing is that you have a current emotional foundation and support each other, and don't let your girlfriend's past become an obstacle and worry between you.

First of all, it's important to be clear that everyone has their own emotional journey, and the experience of passing away is not indicative of what you think and act in the future. Therefore, minding your girlfriend's emotional history is not a rational act.

Second, respect your girlfriend's privacy and personal choices. If your girlfriend chooses to share her past with you, you should respect her choice and refrain from over-judging and criticizing her past. If your girlfriend is reluctant to talk about her past, then you should also respect her choice and don't force her to reveal anything.

Finally, build a healthy relationship of communication and trust. If you really mind your girlfriend's emotional history, then you should communicate openly with her and express your feelings and concerns. At the same time, you should also respect your girlfriend's thoughts and feelings, and build a relationship of mutual trust so that both parties can express their thoughts and feelings honestly.

In conclusion, minding your girlfriend's emotional history is not a healthy behavior, we should respect our girlfriend's personal choices and privacy, and build a healthy communication and trust relationship.

Regardless of the past.

Some men, when they first fall in love with a woman, will wonder how many times their girlfriends have been in love and how many men they have experienced. As a matter of fact, living in 2023 today, which is already a modern society, it is very undesirable to continue to look at this issue with old concepts and old eyes. No woman is 100% sure that the man she fell in love with will be her life partner for decades to come.

Therefore, some men are confused by how many times their girlfriends have talked about love, and they have to find an opportunity to ask for a clear question, which is very immature.

You must know that a woman is more sensitive, and perhaps she was hurt in the previous relationship and is reluctant to mention it, and it is very easy for the man to ask about the details, or even to get to the bottom of it, which can easily arouse resentment from the other party. How do you think she can answer this question? Because you care so much, if she tells you the truth, it will only increase your annoyance.

So a wise woman will tell you: I have been in love once before you, but I am in love with you for the last.

Only by ignoring the past and looking at the future can we deepen this feeling.

Be honest with each other.

Therefore, at the beginning of a relationship, both men and women should be honest and sincere, and should not avoid their own shortcomings, so that it is easier for them to understand each other and to run in before marriage.

Don't have skin-to-skin kisses too soon.

When the love is strong, the flowers bloom spontaneously. Men and women have reached a certain stage of love and are eager to have more. However, it is not necessarily a good thing for this to happen too soon.

Sometimes men are strange animals that have brain circuits that are so strange that they wonder if the other party is too casual and behaves when they get it.

Therefore, women themselves should have a good grip on their own so as not to suffer a big loss in the end.

Male friends should also remember that respecting each other is also the same as respecting oneself. A man who is restrained and patient is more likely to make a woman feel reliable and go with the flow, isn't it?

Maintain each other's good demeanor.

In love, there will inevitably be misunderstandings, quarrels, and awkwardness between lovers, and as a man, we should take the initiative and be generous, and coax and coax women to be happy. As a woman, you should also know how to take advantage of the steps to go downhill, and when the other party sincerely apologizes, you should accept it leniently, and do not hold the other party for too long, otherwise, you will really lose the other party.

The most taboo thing in love is to scold each other, tear their faces, and expose each other's scars and shortcomings when they quarrel. In the end, it will inevitably cast a shadow in the other party's heart, and it is very easy to break up and lose the other party.

If you're a little mindful of your girlfriend's emotional history, the first thing to be clear about is that everyone has a past, including yourself and your girlfriend. Her history of affection or disaffection is her personal matter, and you should respect her privacy and personal choices. Here are some suggestions to deal with this situation:

1.Communicate honestly: Be honest with your girlfriend and express your feelings and concerns. However, make sure you communicate in a positive way and avoid blaming or attacking the other person.

2.Self-reflection: Consider why you mind your girlfriend's emotional history. Is it because you feel threatened or insecure, or because you feel jealous or unacceptable about her past? Self-reflection can help you better understand your emotions and perspectives.

3.Accept the first bend of the past: Everyone has their own experience of growing up as a member and having a relationship in the past. Accepting and understanding your girlfriend's emotional history is part of building a healthy relationship. Try to look at the dedication of her past to what she is to be.

4.Building trust: Building a solid foundation of trust is an important part of a relationship. If you feel like you can't fully trust your girlfriend, then you can work together to build and strengthen that trust.

5.Seek support: If your concerns and worries cannot be resolved, you can seek professional help, such as a counsellor or psychologist. They can help you deal with your emotions and provide more specific advice and guidance.

In conclusion, dealing with your mind about your girlfriend's emotional history needs to be approached with openness and respect. Mutual communication and understanding are key to building healthy relationships. Remember, past experiences don't define a person, it's your relationship together now and your commitment to each other's future.

There is also a possibility that your girlfriend doesn't really love you, so you have to consider breaking up. Because I think that if you really love someone, you will be in the position for the sake of the other party, if you think that your girlfriend is not like this, then you might as well break up, you will find that after you break up with her, she will not have much emotional fluctuations, because she doesn't love you at all, so you might as well love yourself before loving someone, if you find that the person you love can't give you the feeling you want, I think you should stop paralyzing yourself at this time, even if you are barely with her now, Will you be happy in the future? No, it won't.

The best way is to tell your girlfriend directly about your feelings, because your girlfriend may not be too sensitive to these things, and you need to pick and choose.

I think you should be straightforward, tell him that I don't think I'm being taken seriously, and hope that he can do something, and if he confesses the specific reasons to you, we can discuss it again.

Generally speaking, both men and women will not pay much attention to the feelings of their other half. It may be a personality problem, or it may not love each other enough.

Then you should discuss this issue with your girlfriend, empathize, and I believe that your girlfriend will also be considerate of you.

Tell her directly that falling in love requires mutual communication and understanding, and it will become easy to solve when it is reasonable.