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If you're worried about other people's opinions all the time, you can't settle down, and I think it's hard to be cautious all the time. I think it's not easy for you to maintain this state for so many years. From the description of your situation, I have some questions, and of course you can ask yourself.
What do you think of yourself? What do you think of your relationship with your parents? You said that you have always been afraid of your parents, as an adult independent person, so how long do you plan to continue to be afraid?
Have you ever tried to defend your inner self? Have you ever tried to express your true emotions to your parents? What if it was actually expressed?
Have you tried to find an expression that you don't feel aggrieved or rejected by others? May you be happy!
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People like you shouldn't sleep well at night, because your mood is easy to change and fluctuate greatly.
Do something that calms your mind, such as practicing Tai Chi, going for a jog when the sun goes down to relieve stress, watching more funny movies to distract your attention, etc.
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IMHO, if you go on like this, there's a good chance you'll be finished.
There is no one in the world who does not make mistakes, you must often exercise your ability to resist pressure, improve your psychological endurance, strengthen your confidence, make friends with people with good psychological quality, and learn from experience.
Treat anything and anyone, you must not be psychologically broken, you must not be humble or arrogant, full of courage and fearless.
Advice: Nothing is scary, what is scary is the loss of a strong heart.
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Hey, your parents shouldn't be like that, it's going to make you have a shadow.
But that's what they do to you.
So I think it's important for you to have a good talk with them because you've grown up.
It's not a kid anymore.
And then there's having faith in yourself, and you're going to try to change.
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Summary. 1. Timid and fearful, with a weak personality.
1. Timid and fearful, with a weak personality.
2. Hot temper and rebellious personality.
3.Insecurity affects the relationship with parents.
4.It is easy to retreat when encountering difficulties, and the ability to resist frustration is poor.
Dear, in short, parents should not criticize their children often, but always encourage their children, so that their children can grow up healthy and happy in a relaxed and happy environment!
There are, how to change.
1.Talk about things on the facts, don't be emotional, lower high expectations, and have too high expectations for children, often easy to get angry and unscrupulous. Lower your expectations for your child, and you'll find that your child isn't that bad.
As parents, when educating our children, we must first keep ourselves calm and focus on solving the problem for the matter itself, rather than emotionally accusing and abusing the child. When you are calm, your child is calm.
2.Help children face difficulties together and solve difficultiesChildren are still young and have limited abilities, and some of the problems that seem very simple to us adults may be a mountain that children cannot climb. For example:
There was a bucket of water in front of him blocking the way, and the adult could quickly move it away, but the child couldn't, because he only had that much strength. Parents are the guides of children, when children encounter difficulties, we should not stand on the side of the problem to defeat the child, but actively help the child to solve, to win the child's trust and intimacy.
3.Empathy, as much as possible into the child's heart, the so-called empathy, is to think from the other person's point of view and feel the other person's feelings. A child who has been hurt is very sensitive psychologically, they are extremely eager for someone to understand him, believe in him, and help him, and at the same time they will be very cautious for fear of being hurt again.
Therefore, parents can only open their children's hearts by understanding their children with empathy, communicating with their children, and letting their guards down. The process will be difficult and will take a long time, but stopping the abuse and suppression must be the first step to saving the child.
If it's a child, how to change.
Communicate with your parents when they are in a better mood and ask them not to criticize you all the time. At the same time, no matter what you do, you must do your best to do it well, and if your parents see that you are doing your best, they will also reduce the number of times they criticize you.
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Summary. Hello, friend. When I was beaten and scolded by my parents, I did have extreme thoughts. Because at that time, I did feel very wronged and helpless.
Hello, friend. When I was beaten and scolded by my parents, I did have extreme thoughts. Because at that time, I did feel very wronged and helpless.
Sometimes they even run away from home. So that they can never find themselves. Make them regret it. But after the fact, this kind of thinking is gone. It's just that when you're particularly angry, you have such thoughts.
Why do my parents always say a few words to deny me everything?
Why don't you talk back and your child grows up estranged from their parents.
In fact, sometimes you can express your own opinions. I remember when I was fourteen or fifteen years old, I suddenly dared to defy my parents. After confronting his parents, he was very happy. It seems that the emotions that have been suppressed for a long time are vented at once.
That's when I confronted my mother for the first time. Mom probably didn't expect me to stare at him, so he didn't say anything more.
Read your narrative carefully. You also said that you are in your twenties, (I am about the same age as you, I can be said to be a person of the same generation, born in the 80s) is an adult, in other words, it is already the age of raising the next generation. Our generation, and our parents' generation, is certainly different and very different. >>>More
Parents need to spend more time with their children, maybe your child has grown up, but he will also need help from parents in other areas. Every time he encounters a problem, help him solve it, and don't blame and abuse. At the beginning, the child will definitely resist his parents, but after a long time, when the parents give the child the feeling that they are very capable and patient, the child will have trust in the parents, and the feelings will be good. >>>More
Some parents will favor a certain child because in the eyes of the parents, the child is weaker. It may be that the child has not been in good health since he was a child, and the parents need to spend time and energy to take care of it, so the parents will involuntarily favor this side. On the contrary, if another child is in good physical condition, the parents will want him to do more work and contribute more.
Both parents love us and make decisions for us. They decide what we want to do in the college entrance examination, they decide which unit we work in, they decide who we fall in love with, they even decide when we get married, and even when we should have children. Are your parents like that? >>>More
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