What should you know when criticizing your child, what ten sentences should you never say?

Preface: When educating children, parents must also learn to be cautious and cautious, taking into account that children also have self-esteem at a young age. When facing criticism, it is important to remember that there are some things that should never be said directly to your child.

When faced with a child's mistake, most parents will angrily say to their child, "I shouldn't have given birth to you if I knew you were such a thing." "If you study so badly, you might as well go directly to someone else's house," these are all things that parents like to say to their children. Just because the child is relatively young, he doesn't realize that what his parents say is angry talk.

In the face of today's parents, when their children make mistakes, they will say some cruel things when they are angry. Such cruel words can cause serious harm to the child, because the child does not have a better understanding. When you are with your parents, you will always feel that your parents love you the most, and once you make a mistake, your children will feel more afraid of their parents in their hearts.

You may even hear your parents say things like this, thinking that you shouldn't be living in this world. <>

When parents are faced with the decline in their children's test scores, they always blindly compare the academic performance of their children, thinking that their children's academic performance will fall behind once they fall behind. They will even directly say to their children that your academic performance is not as good as others, so don't go home at all, and go directly to other people's homes to live. For parents, such language does not play a good educational role, but will bring negative effects to children.

Parents should be aware that they are very angry when criticizing their children, but they should not say angry things to their children at the same time because of their young age. It is difficult to realize how to express such angry words from parents, especially when the child is in a rebellious period, and should not be taught in this way. If the child really has an accident, it is also something that parents regret and should discuss amicably whenever the child makes a mistake.

When criticizing your child, you must pay attention to the way and do not use insulting language towards your child. Respect your child's personality. Don't use swear words.

The things I can't say are that you've really disappointed me. Other people's children are better than you. You look at other people's children.

You're just terrible. I don't want you anymore. What you're doing is really going too far.

You're the most failed kid I've ever seen. You're simply not as good as everyone else.

Don't insult your child, don't be too strong, don't yell at your child, don't threaten your child, don't put too much pressure on your child.

Children are the most innocent species in the world, and they are also the most troublesome. There is a saying that describes a child like this, "three years old is good, ten years old is tired" pickpocket, that is, children before the age of three are particularly smart and most popular with their elders, but once the child grows to three years old, before the age of 13, it is the age when cats like dogs too much. The mind is active, it is easy to make trouble, it is curious about the world, it is eager to discover the world, and it is always easy to make a lot of mistakes.

Children at this stage are the most headache for parents, but there is nothing they can do. Some short-tempered parents, when they meet their children and make mistakes, will always get angry, beat and scold their children, and even say some radical things.

In fact, sometimes, this kind of verbal abuse makes the child feel more "hurt" than physical "corporal punishment", and the child suffers the shadow and harm of life. For example, in the following three sentences, parents should not say it even if they are angry. For a child, it is like a sharp arrow piercing the heart, leaving a shadow!

In contemporary Chinese education, boys are told not to flick tears when they have tears. So some parents teach boys from an early age not to cry and to hold back their tears no matter what happens. So when some boys are reprimanded by their parents, they are obviously sad in their hearts, but they can't let it go.

If they stick with it for a long time, it can have an impact on the child's psyche.

Educate children not to always be depressed, let children vent their spring morning suspicions at the right time, and let children vent any negative emotions, which is good for children's physical and mental health. A small tree that encourages and inhibits its growth too much will not help it grow in the future. A lot of times, people close to you tend to say something more hurtful.

It is normal for children to be naughty by nature, like to fight, and are prone to trouble. It is also right for parents to educate their children and help them correct their mistakes. But remember to pay attention to your emotions and don't hurt your child with words.

Many parents have a blank mind when they are angry. Only when you are angry with your child and vent your emotions will you often say something hurtful to others and yourself.

These words not only hurt their young hearts, but also alienated the parent-child relationship between you. This is a phrase that many parents often like to say, but it is a nightmare for their children. As the saying goes, each finger has its own strengths and weaknesses, and each child has its own advantages and disadvantages.

What parents should do is not to always compare their children, but to play to his strengths and help him correct his shortcomings. No child wants to be compared. The behavior of parents is not only irresponsible to their children, but also an insult to their own behavior.

Every child is unique. They don't need to compare, but they are the darlings of their parents.

No, Li can say that you are so stupid, why are you so stupid, why are you so stupid, why are you so stupid, why can't you sit down well, other people's children are doing better than you. I don't want you anymore, you get out quickly.

When criticizing, these words can't be said, such as tearing down the bridge and you don't obey anymore, I don't like you, you look at other people's children, people won't be like you, you are too stupid, why can't this, if you study hard, I will laugh and reward you with gifts, how can I give birth to a child like you, etc.

For example, swearing words, this kind of words are not only very uncivilized, but also let the child's auspicious posture be imperceptibly learned; Words of caution such as negative energy, which will make children feel particularly sad and not conducive to the formation of children's self-confidence.

It is impossible to say words that hurt the child's self-esteem, because Xinzhen is an insult to a personality for such words, which will cause psychological damage to the child and affect the child's physical and mental health.

<>When I was a child, my mom criticized me and my sister, and my sister always cried, but I rarely cried. Adults always have wonderful ideas, she criticizes you, and if you don't cry, she will feel that you don't recognize your mistakes; If you cry, she is very annoyed and thinks you can't stand a word or two. Inability to communicate.

Communication is a two-way street, and it is difficult to continue without one-sided statements and criticisms without feedback from children. When many parents don't get feedback, they often turn from focusing on the thing itself to attacking their children, from the thing to the person, and even escalating to venting their emotions, forgetting the original intention of solving the problem.

In fact, children who don't talk back, don't cry or make trouble are the most worrying, and parents already have a fixed image in their hearts. They think that their parents don't understand them, they only know about education, and they never ask for reasons. Believing that one's authority has been challenged.

Many parents interpret their children's rubber sedan mouth as not recognizing their mistakes, and not speaking as silent resistance. Parents become even more angry when they find out that their children do not approve of their education and feel that their authority is being challenged. Or in other words, the child is indifferent, feels helpless, and feels helpless.

In the past, the whole family offered to Xiaojun like a little emperor, but now I don't know what's going on, it seems that the whole family has made a 180-degree turn to Xiaojun, and almost every day you can hear the sound of Xiaojun being trained, either parents or grandparents, sometimes a family of four takes turns to carry out wheel wars against children, so that the neighbors are not in peace.

This problem can only be done through the reasons for criticizing the child and the feelings between yourself and the child, understanding the child, slowly groping the child's heart, and slowly analyzing the child's thoughts. After all, children's personalities are different, and the reasons for criticizing children are different, so the silent inner thoughts in their hearts are also very different! But in fact, psychological experts have found that children's silence after verbal violence is actually a manifestation of psychological trauma.

This means that your child is starting to ignore your education and even think that talking to you is a waste of time. Just like I thought at the beginning, I'm annoyed!

Don't tell your children, you're too stupid, I don't like to go back to you, don't want a child like you, you're not as good as someone else's child. You don't let me worry at all, why are you so shameless, can you give me some anger with the split, etc. These words are not allowed to be told to children, because they can hurt children's self-esteem.

When educating children, we must treat them with a peaceful mind.

Don't be undefeated to say words that hit the child, or don't belittle the child, and don't scold the child, or don't say that the child is very incompetent, and when criticizing the child, you must pay attention to proportion, you must pay attention to the bottom line and principles, and don't hurt the child's self-esteem.

You can't talk to your child and say that your mother doesn't like you anymore, she doesn't love you anymore, you look at other people's children, you make mistakes again, I'm going to throw you out, send you to the policeman's uncle's house, don't call my parents anymore, etc.

Guess the oak when criticizing the child, don't say some insulting words, don't always hit the child, you should explain the problem to the child clearly, and then guide the child well, instead of beating and scolding the child.

Don't say things that disappoint the child, don't make fun of the child, don't discourage the child's self-confidence, and let the child realize their own mistakes.

Don't talk swear words with dirty words, so that the child's psychological shadow side is cautious to guess Hu Jida, and then don't talk too ruthlessly, I don't want you, if you can't rent a kind of leniency, try to control your emotions, and communicate well with your child.

<> "Family Education Tips.

little knowledge of family education

If the child can't accept criticism, these 3 sentences should be told to the child.

Tell your child: If you are not afraid of the teacher's criticism, you are afraid that the teacher will ignore you.

Mom knows very well that only teachers who are attentive to you and have expectations for you will point out your shortcomings, will not tolerate you to make mistakes, and will only hate iron and steel.

Tell the child that parental strictness is "love".

The doting of parents is "harm".

If you can correct your mistakes, use them as a warning and remind yourself of them.

Mom and Dad will not be stingy with encouragement and praise for you.

Tell your child: If education is only praise, you will always be a child who is not big.

Everyone who dares to criticize you is a noble person in your life.

You must fight imitation training to cherish!

When children make mistakes, adults must not tolerate them, and the other party must criticize them in time, otherwise children will become more and more willful because of their own doting. However, criticism is also methodical, and some parents think that it is just a simple scolding of the other party or hitting the child twice, which actually does not grasp the essence of "criticism" education. Here, adults must always keep in mind that "education is the mainstay, criticism is supplemented", education is the goal and criticism is the means.

According to this concept, beating and scolding children obviously goes against the original intention, not only destroys the relationship between the two, but also fails to guide the children to make changes spontaneously. So how exactly should parents criticize their children? First of all, it is important to note that there are some things that should never be said in front of your child.

This is what almost 99% of parents will say to their children, such as "you are so useless", "you can't do this little thing well", "you are so stupid". Often when they see their children behaving poorly, adults will say this kind of thing to hit him, maybe just to express their inner disappointment, but listening to the children's ears often set off turbulent waves, because this actually denies personal value, not to mention that they don't understand what "personal value" is, and everyone can distinguish between praise and belittling. Children who do not get it for a long time will definitely fall into the trap of self-doubt, and the whole person will become more and more inferior, and things will not be done well.

Parents are accustomed to belittling their children, for example, they often say to their children, "What do you know", "Don't intervene in adults' affairs, children", "It's not your concern" and other words. Although he did not explicitly deny the value of the other party, he showed a contemptuous attitude. It is important to know that the other person cares about certain things out of a desire to explore and hobbies, and parents saying these words will inevitably discourage him, which is obviously not conducive to children's learning and growth.

Look at the neighbor's chubby, only five years old can speak a lot of English words, you don't know a few letters until now", many parents will say something like this to compare their children with others, which is actually not appropriate. The child has no obvious shame, so it is very unrealistic to expect him to be brave after being ashamed, on the contrary, many people become less and less confident because of this comparison, and finally choose to break the jar.