How to get out of the dilemma of loneliness and helplessness after widowhood?

Losing a spouse is an extremely painful and challenging experience, and it takes time and hard work to get out of the shadow of widowhood. Here are some suggestions that I hope you will find helpful:

1.Allow self-grief: Widowhood can cause a deep sense of grief and loss, which is a normal emotional response. Don't suppress your grief and allow yourself to cry, reminisce, and face painful feelings.

2.Receive support: Talk to a family member, friend, or professional counselor to share your feelings and confusion. They can provide emotional support and guidance to help you deal with grief and find positive ways to cope.

3.Find a support group: Join a widow support group or attend a similar event to connect with others who are going through similar experiences. Share each other's experiences and feelings, encourage and support each other.

4.Rebuild your life slowly: Gradually regain the balance and rhythm of your life. Re-develop your hobbies, engage in social activities, catch up with friends, and build new relationships.

5.Seek professional help: If you're feeling persistent blue, anxious, or unable to shake the shadow of widowhood, seeking professional help is a good option. Counsellors can provide targeted support and** help you rebuild your life.

6.Give yourself time: Everyone's mourning and ** process is different, and it takes time to immerse yourself in the shadow of widowhood. Don't force yourself to come out right away, give yourself plenty of space and time to heal.

Most importantly, be patient and kind to yourself, and respect your feelings and needs. Being widowed is a turning point in life, but it can also be an opportunity to redefine and reinvent yourself.

Today is the seventh day of my husband's heart attack, and I heard that the souls of the relatives who died in the first seven will come back to see, so I have been staying at home and not going out, offering good food and wine, and spending this important day with my parents, brothers, and daughters-in-law at noon. This year, my husband just turned 56 years old, and the child is 25 years old and has gone to work, and the days are still dull and happy, but this sudden accident has made my life a matter of people overnight, every time I think of the night of the illness, from the home to the ambulance to the rescue room in just a few tens of minutes of every scene, he struggled in pain and finally desperately shouted Hurry up and give me an injection All this scene is like yesterday, so clear, I don't believe that a living husband will be gone, and there will be no more ......

Personally, I think there are four aspects.

1. Children should care more about the elderly Children should do their duty to support and be filial to the elderly, and they should pay more attention when they are in other places, so that the elderly can enjoy the joy of their children and grandchildren around their knees and the younger generations to ask for warmth, so as not to feel left out and abandoned.

2. Support the remarriage of the elderly No matter how good the children are to the elderly, some feelings are irreplaceable by the children, and some of the emotional needs of the elderly cannot be satisfied by the children. Therefore, for widows, children should be zealous and fulfill them.

3. Cultivate personal interest Gain fun from activities such as reading, learning calligraphy, painting, practicing the piano, planting flowers, and raising animals. All of this helps to free oneself from the lonely circle. Even if there may be only one person engaged in these activities, once you dedicate yourself to it, the loneliness quietly disappears.

4. Insist on a moderate amount of exercise every day You must insist on physical exercise for about an hour every day, and take a walk together, which is simple and easy to do, and the effect is good. Exercise can also improve mental health, regulate positive emotions, and eliminate mental stress and loneliness. Medical psychology experts point out that psychological adaptation, the most important thing is the adaptation to interpersonal relationships.

Exercise has become a good form of promoting the psychological adaptability of the elderly.

5. Family members often talk to the elderly The elderly are at home all day long, with a small range of activities, and they are old, frail and sickly, coupled with the concern for their children and the longing for their former friends, their hearts are often not at peace. These mental anguish, boredoms, and worries need to be vented outwards and told to others. If the juniors can take the time to talk with the elderly, it can make the elderly psychologically satisfied, and at the same time, it is also conducive to the harmony of the family atmosphere.

Marriage should not act as a dishonorable interferer.

In general, the grief of losing a loved one goes through the following stages in turn:

The first stage is to accept the loss of a loved one. Many people can't accept this fact, and find that they often have the desire to pursue their deceased relatives, and often think about where to go to find their lost relatives; Some people always have a feeling that their relatives have gone on a business trip or gone to study in a distant place, and they are psychologically and emotionally unwilling to admit the fact that their relatives have died; Others refuse to acknowledge the irreversibility of the loss of their loved ones, still hope that the deceased will return, and so on. These emotions will bring the bereaved to a standstill at the first stage of the grieving process.

It takes time to accept the fact of losing a loved one because it is not only a physical feeling, but also an emotional one. It is easier to intellectually admit this reality after losing the voice of a loved one, but it takes a considerable amount of time for the omen to fully accept it emotionally.

The second stage is to experience the pain of grief. This pain is not only emotional, but also physical and behavioral. It is impossible to be completely free of pain.

Some people try to escape the pain in a certain way, such as only thinking about the bad side of the deceased in order to avoid uncomfortable feelings; Some put themselves so deeply into their work that they don't have time to suffer; Others use alcohol, medicine, or travel to escape sadness.

In fact, grief is unavoidable, and avoiding it is more harmful than confronting it. Medical practice has proven that sooner or later those who try to escape grief will break down, most commonly suffering from depression, and some will suffer from more serious mental illnesses. Counselling can help them learn to face reality so that they don't have to carry this pain for the rest of their lives.

The third stage is to learn to adapt to the new environment in which the deceased loved one no longer exists, to play a new role that he was not used to before, and to master some life skills that he did not have before, so as to adapt to the new environment. If we fail to recognize that the environment has changed, so as to redefine the purpose of life, it is easy to fall into long-term misery and cannot extricate ourselves, which is extremely detrimental to health.

As a bereaved mother wrote, "It was only recently that I noticed that there were things in life that were still open to me and made me happy." I will still mourn for my child, and the memories of my love for him will live forever, but life will go on, and I must live healthy no matter what.

You should think of it this way, each of us is walking towards that Elysium all the time, but some people run faster, some people run slower, and the fast runners rest in that world and wait for our arrival, but he [she] does not want us to live in such pain, we must be brave and strong and happy to live to comfort him [her] in the spirit of heaven.

After being widowed, you will inevitably feel lonely and helpless, how can you get out of such a predicament?

Based on what I have seen and heard, I believe that there are several ways to learn from:

First, after being widowed for a year, the sad mood has calmed down, you can find a marriage agency or through a friend's introduction, get to know each other, get to know each other, be like-minded, form a new family, huddle for warmth, better than loneliness! It is said that if you are in a good mood, you will live a long life.

Second, live with your children, help each other in life, and enjoy family fun if you have grandchildren. The feeling of loneliness and helplessness will also be reduced.

Third, they went to the home for the elderly to play cards, play chess, sing songs, and dance. Or go to a university for the elderly, add new knowledge, new fun, and meet new people. In this way, the feeling of loneliness and helplessness will disappear.

Fourth, join a tour group and go out for a walk.

Fifth, raising some small pets, cats and dogs can also make people forget their troubles and sorrows, so that people do not feel lonely and helpless.

Sixth, if conditions permit, you can also live in a nursing home.

In short, the most important thing is the mentality, it depends on what you think, and it depends on how you do it. I think that as long as you have self-confidence and a good attitude, you will get out of the lonely and helpless predicament after being widowed. I hope that the widows in the world will not have the plight of being lonely and helpless.

If you want to get out of the shadow of widowhood as soon as possible, the first thing to make clear is that if the subject is still alive, you don't want to see this situation, so you have to find something to do, you can't lose the motivation to live, and then you have the opportunity to find a new partner.

After being widowed, you should come out of your grief as soon as possible. Talk to your friends and family. You have to find your own work. Look away. There is a chance to find another half to spend your old age in peace!