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If you want people to understand your hard work, you must first make people understand your kindness. Everyone's experience is different, and the perspective of things will be different. Many times your kindness may be purposefully good for others, and most people don't believe that there will be people in this society who give to them for no reason.
In this way, first of all, you have to let people know your intentions, whether you like him or because he has some other purpose, if not good for him, at least not for bad intentions! This way people will not feel wary and resistant to you, and this is the first step. After this step, the other person can accept your kindness to him.
In the long run, the other party will feel that what you do to him is genuinely for his sake, and will fully trust you and even rely on you. This is a good start, after which your trust has become very stable and a tacit understanding has formed. In many things, even if you have disagreements, you will trust each other.
The other person will also think that your starting point must be for his good, and then you can tell him in a way you know why you insist that he listen to you. You can even lead by example by letting things happen to you first, so that the bad results can be seen in the first place. Let him see that the development trend of this matter is not good for him, so that he will intuitively feel your good intentions.
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Then you should tell him clearly about the suffering you have experienced, and talk about it vividly, and maybe he will be able to understand.
In addition, let them think about the suffering they have experienced, and let them feel the pain for themselves, and maybe he will understand.
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It's difficult, since a person is an adult, he should have a sense of responsibility that he can bear, don't tell his distress to the people around him, only bring positive energy to them. I remember when I first went to work in the field, I would tell my family if I felt a little uncomfortable or had a little problem. During that time, my mother cried every day, and she was worried that I would be bullied when I was alone in the field.
Then I talked about so many negative energy things, which made my mother feel depressed every day and her health was not good. Slowly, I grew up, learned to hide it, brought a lot of good news home, and kept my own bitterness in my heart. Obviously, my parents' health has also improved.
Therefore, I think that you should never tell your family about a lot of distress, because talking too much will only cause harm to your family.
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Sometimes it is difficult for people to understand, and if you don't do it, it will be "good intentions as donkey liver and lungs". The people you get along with will "dog bite Lu Dongbin, don't know good people's hearts." "The best way is to get along for a long time, tolerate each other, and share ups and downs.
Look for opportunities to dispel biases and misunderstandings in the other person's mind. It is necessary to have more contact and communication with people, and use practical actions to influence and influence each other. "The road knows the horsepower, and the people will see the hearts of the people over time", after a long time, it will be understood.
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In fact, you have to learn to let go of your own suffering, instead of blindly letting others understand that many people have their own suffering, if you tell others, others will only laugh at you, and not so many people will care about your life.
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It is not easy for others to understand their own hard work, and many of us as children do not understand the hard work of our parents. Time is good medicine, just let it be and be worthy of your heart. Sometimes if you don't know about it by the people around you, you can write a diary by yourself or go out for a walk, and you can solve it yourself.
I regularly organize a trip for myself, if nothing else, just to relax. Rather than talking to the people around you, many things are really better to digest by yourself.
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It's very difficult, any good intentions, can only let the other party understand, understanding is love, not understanding is should, people are originally the original nature of human beings, greed occupies most people's hearts to understand the spirit, and gratitude to understand the heart, a few people do it, so since ancient times to advocate loyalty, righteousness and benevolence, why, because people's selfish desires are greater than gratitude and understanding. Therefore, only by following nature can we have peace of mind.
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Learn to communicate, and it may be through communication that you can know whether your hard work is wrong, whether it is necessary, and whether it is in line with the other party. Only communication can narrow the distance between each other and deepen mutual understanding. Even if the other party still does not understand after communication, it will greatly reduce misunderstandings and conflicts between each other.
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Find someone who is willing to listen to you, and if someone doesn't want to come into your life, he won't understand you what you do.
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I don't think there is any need for others to know about my suffering, after all, my suffering is because of my own efforts, others have no way to understand their own suffering, and there is no way to understand what they have gained, and there are very few people in this world who can find someone who understands us, so there is no need to force others to understand themselves.
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Understand the characteristics of the other party and examine your own painstaking efforts from the other party's point of view, because although your starting point is good, it is inconsistent with the other person's personality, or even contradictory, then the other party may not appreciate and understand even if you know your hard work.
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It's better to say more than to do more, and the people who really care about you are looking at you and will definitely understand you. It's not someone who really cares about you, no matter how much you say, it's useless, and there's no need to make him understand.
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First of all, we must examine whether our painstaking efforts are wrong, superfluous, or completely unnecessary. If so, correct the mistake or give up the painstaking work.
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I think life is not easy for everyone, there is no need for others to understand their own suffering, after all, no one can empathize with anyone's suffering, so be strong and digest it yourself
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Sincere interaction with others will also get a very good friendship, try to empathize, maybe his perspective is difficult to understand you, so try to find a way to convince the other party that you really have a special situation, good luck.
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As the saying goes, do not do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Everyone has their own difficulties, so there is no reason for us to let others understand our pain.
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Even if others understand your own suffering, it won't help much, so it's good to get through the pain.
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I think it's better to talk to the people around me so that they can understand a little bit.
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Many times we feel that we are very miserable, it is not easy, or we feel that we have given a lot, but we are not understood by others. Why do you do so much but others don't understand it?
First, maybe your suffering is not bitter, and your contribution is not so heavy! It's just that you're exaggerating yourself, or you're too much to handle!
Second, others have not experienced what you have experienced, they have not met the people you have met, so it is difficult to understand! It's like raising a child to know the kindness of your parents.
How can we talk about the lack of clarity so that we are not bitter?
1.Don't complain.
Life will inevitably encounter stumbles, don't complain about the heavens and the earth when you encounter things, don't think that you are the most aggrieved and bitter person in your heart.
If you are depressed and uncomfortable after doing something, don't complain, because once the complaint starts, the bitterness will take root in your heart along with the complaint!
2.Accept everything life has given us, and believe that our efforts will be rewarded.
Many times we are forced to do something that we are not willing to do, so think about it, what is the compulsion? Is there something related to you behind it?
For example, if you don't want to work, but in order to make money, you can use money to satisfy your life!
For example, we don't want to accompany our children to do their homework, but we want to have a child with good grades in our own hearts.
3.Give without expecting anything in return.
There are a lot of giving, we don't ask for anything in return, this kind of giving, often does not make us painful, because there is no want, not getting is very justified, but getting is an unexpected surprise!
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Suffering is not easily manifested. For example, when a person's parents died suddenly in a car accident, he may be more shocked and unbelievable, and it is not until some time later, on a certain night, that he suddenly cries out in tears. A person's parents are seriously ill and hospitalized, and their children are also very sad when they die, but they are mentally prepared, and it may not have such a big impact.
And as bystanders, we understand that he is in pain, but we don't know how he is in pain.
It is difficult to understand a person's suffering, but we can put ourselves in the other person's perspective and imagine what happened to them, so that we may be able to understand one or two, but it is really difficult to fully understand.
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Only in this way can you empathize with him and understand his suffering.
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One will never understand the pain of another.
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Be fully aware of his past. The modern situation. You will understand his suffering. It's impossible to be 100% that profound.
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Place oneself in somebody's shoes! Put yourself in the other person's role, imagine yourself as miserable as the other person, imagine yourself in the other person's situation, that may be understandable.
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