How to choose a painful marriage? What should I do if my marriage is painful?

I think everyone has the right and freedom to pursue their own happiness. The situation you're in right now is a terrible thing for any woman.

My husband is sexually impotent and doesn't treat you well. I feel like in this marriage, your body and your spirit are in a state of pain, and the only thing that keeps you from making decisions is your children. You don't want him to live in a broken family.

But think about it, if your husband and wife have a bad relationship and your family is not harmonious, can the child get real happiness from this superficial wholeness?

You can talk to your husband first and listen to what he thinks of the family, maybe the real reason why he is not good to you is because of his incompetence, so he is in a bad mood and has no good face for you. Whatever the case may be, communication comes first, and maybe it can save the marriage.

But if both people feel that this marriage is really unsustainable, and they can pursue their own happiness, if they have children, they should also tell him well, so that he understands that even if his parents are not together, they still love him and will treat him better.

You are an unfortunate woman, and it is not easy to be widowed at a young age. Whether your marriage continues or not depends on your husband and your affection, and if your husband is really bad to you, you divorce. If your husband has deep feelings for you and is willing to live a good life with you, but this aspect does not meet your needs, I don't think you should divorce, and if you leave your husband, he will feel even more pain.

Even if you leave him, you will worry about him, and even affect the new family, I hope you will think twice, you must think carefully, marriage is not a child's play.

This one really is.

It's not easy for you

Ask your husband to treat it really can't be cured, and then think about other problems.

Because he is incompetent, he will treat you badly, have you taken him to the doctor, maybe he can be cured, you must know that the biggest harm of divorce is the child, if he can cure it then everything will be fine.

Your husband must be very distressed! Talk to him... Communication...

Children should be given a complete home... Sex and love are inseparable...

I really don't know how to help you with this problem, so I recommend that you consult a specialist. Think carefully.

Marriage is painful because the life you are living now is different from the life you lived before, or it is not what you imagined. Divorce hurts the most children, and if you don't divorce, it's you who suffers the most. Whether to divorce can be considered from your current marriage and living status, if the other party is a problem of domestic violence, gambling and other principles, then there is absolutely zero tolerance for such problems, and divorce must be made.

If the other party is still playing the role of a good father or mother, from the perspective of the child, then you should carefully consider whether the marriage and divorce are worthwhile. First of all, divorce do you want to raise this child? If you are raising this child, will you find another person to raise with you or alone?

If you are raising alone, will you be able to afford it on your own? Will your child grow up healthily with you? The premise of the child's healthy growth is that the child has an environment that can allow him to grow up healthily, and the biggest premise is that the father loves the mother.

There are always more ways than problems, the key to divorce or not lies in your personal thoughts, there is no specific fixed answer to this, it does not mean that you must not divorce if you have children, if you feel that the marriage is not necessary to maintain, you will divorce decisively. But at the same time, you need to bear all the consequences of divorce, whether it is about the words of friends and family, the strange way of looking at them, or the changes in your life that it brings. If you are in deep pain in this marriage and cannot extricate yourself, there is no guarantee that there will be no problems if you endure it for a long time.

In recent years, the divorce rate in China has risen, and in order to alleviate the rising divorce rate in China, the draft of the Civil Code in China will be introduced"Cooling-off period for divorce"As the name suggests, it requires that when both spouses want to apply for divorce, if one party is unwilling to divorce within 30 days, they can withdraw the divorce application. So this 30 days gives you the space to think and calm down, and think about it before making a decision. Because the only person responsible for your life is yourself.

Clause. First, we should pay attention to each other.

In married life, the dangers of emotions should be highly recognized, and it is important to pay attention to the beliefs of the immediate family members and give the other party the attention they need, which will improve the bond between the couple and help maintain a long-term relationship as a couple. Step into the temple of married life, and the other partner will become a part of your daily life. But that doesn't mean you can have the other side and don't have to think that everything is legitimate.

Whether you are alone or in front of your friends and loved ones, you should be attentive and friendly, and learn to respect each other's experiences and decisions, even if you have different suggestions.

Clause. 2. Open your heart to carry out communication.

If there is a lack of emotional communication between the couple, or if there is a hindrance in communication, it will be detrimental to the couple's relationship. Everyone should be honest in married life, and they can only be honest with each other when the communication channels are open to the outside world. Therefore, even if you are busy at work, taking care of children, going to the gym, or doing housework and business activities, you should save some time every day to communicate with your loved one.

No matter what the theme is, they can pay attention to the other person's new interests and preferences in the near future, and the two can share each other's personal experiences.

Clause. 3. Financial transparency.

All people have the right to maintain separate or detailed accounting entities, so that both spouses can have their own bank accounts, and it is important for married life to make immediate family members aware of their own business situation, which is a key part of creating trust and attention. If you have a new financing plan, or are planning to borrow money from friends and family, let the other brother and one party participate, otherwise the other party will lose trust in you, and it will also lead to emotional conflicts in the relationship.

Clause. Fourth, make immediate concessions.

Many people feel that concessions are a major disadvantage, so they are usually reluctant to concede. In fact, there are situations in which marriage life is the solution, and concession is the solution. When couples live together for many years, they are faced with a variety of choices and decisions, and are often in a situation where they are looking for concessions.

In fact, concession is not tolerance, but tolerance and open-mindedness, and sometimes you can give up some of your own emotional opinions, and then let each other reach an agreement, so that the satisfaction rate of married life may increase.

In general, in married life, the relationship between husband and wife must be properly handled, and contemporary people usually do not pay attention to finding ways to solve emotional difficulties, but only choose divorce methods to avoid the existence of problems. Some of the methods listed above can improve the relationship between husband and wife, and only when mutual understanding and effective communication can be achieved that the date can be sold and the happiness of married life can be ensured.

Marriage is a personal matter, and it is your choice whether to divorce or not. It may not be right to continue, and it is not necessarily wrong to divorce firmly; There is continued suffering, and divorce is difficult to divorce, so many people will be entangled again and again in a painful marriage.

Regardless of the outcome, when a marriage is in pain, there is homework to be done.

Divorce is not all negative energy.

People who want to divorce are not necessarily good people; But a kind person finally chooses to divorce, it must take courage, without courage, it is impossible to complete the renunciation; Without courage, you can't carry a person's loneliness and sadness; Without courage, it is impossible to be confident in yourself, to be hopeful for the future, and to be able to give yourself enough strength.

Kind people who finally choose to divorce must also experience painful suffering, they are not unable to bear the pain of marriage, but they just don't want to let their lives be exhausted. When a marriage finally gives oneself cannot be happy, then choosing divorce is just to pursue one's own happiness; If we are not happy, we will not have the ability or possibility to give happiness to those who really care about us, such as our parents, such as our children.

Divorce also requires ability, and only independent, strong, and capable people can bravely face divorce. Therefore, some people say: "A person must maintain the power of divorce at any time in marriage", which is not a resistance to the malice of marriage, but to avoid destroying one's lifelong self-protection because of unladylike encounters.

The most difficult thing about divorce is not actually a real problem, but a knot in the heart.

Years of affection, not just say it; In the face of emotional pain and trauma, you can't let go; On the one hand, you feel disappointed and hopeless, and on the other hand, you are constantly fantasizing, giving yourself unattainable hope; You look forward to the day when time passes, everything you have experienced can finally disappear like a dream, your life finally ushers in the dawn again, and your perseverance and waiting are finally not disappointed - however, reality often gives you a hard slap in the face, and then another slap ......All choices that place the future on the outside cannot be arbitrary.

It's still on your own, and the extent to which you can rely on yourself is the absolute truth that you have a better chance of happiness. Of course, divorce is difficult to divorce, but the biggest advantage of divorce is that you can finally decide your own 24-hour minutes and seconds of the day, and decide the joys, sorrows and sorrows of the 365 days of the year.

If marriage is really a kind of fate, then, when the fate is over, say goodbye bravely - no matter what you experience in marriage, what you encounter, or what you have endured, you should be owed in the previous life, and I only hope that in the next life, we will never owe each other again, and we will never see each other again.

Hello, I have seen your question and am sorting out the answer, please wait a while

It's the kind of wife who holds everything in her heart and doesn't say anything, and the man never takes the initiative to try to understand what his wife is thinking, and in the end the wife sulks, and the husband feels that you are making trouble.