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13 years old is the time when the child is rebellious, during this time parents can not compete with the child, can only go with the flow, every child has this period, parents should be patient and can not interfere too much, children in this period seem to understand everything, but they think that they have grown up, there are many things have their own opinions, although these views are wrong parents, but parents explain useless, so they can only let it go, some children will be sensible soon after this period of time, Some children are going downhill, so parents can only use actions to guide correctly, and too many explanations are useless.
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1. Distinguish the occasion and wording
If a child is criticized in front of relatives, friends or peers, the child will feel embarrassed and dissatisfied, and will not listen to the parent's criticism.
2. The wording of criticism should be appropriate
Don't "you're incorrigible", "why aren't you as good as so-and-so"."You're so stupid" and so hurt the child's self-esteem.
of words. 3. The right thing is not the right person
Parents who really know how to criticize should focus on how to promote their children to correct their shortcomings, rather than holding on to their shortcomings. That is, just talk about things, and don't turn over old accounts.
4. Proper cold treatment
When the child has a strong emotional reaction and impulsive speech, parents simply ignore the child and wait for the child to think calmly and calm down the impulse before criticizing.
Let your child learn to compare his heart to his heart.
Parents should be straightforward about their worries and worries when interfering with their children's actions, so that their parents know their love. For example, to deal with the matter of children returning late from school, some parents wait for their children to come home, scold their heads and faces, and order them not to return late in the future.
This way of dealing with it is too impatient, and the child not only does not experience the love of the parents, but has a resistance to the parents, thinking that they are making a big fuss and managing too widely.
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Children should be educated from an early age.
To start, there must be education.
Be patient, can't shout.
Scream, or kid.
There is a rebellious heart, more.
Disobedient.
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For general things, try to do it according to the child's own ideas, do not interfere with him, this is his process of self-exploration and self-growth. Restricting children too much will affect the development of children's nature.
For issues related to the safety of children, and related to conduct. Tell your child in advance, don't do it, and draw clear boundaries with him. These are the guarantees for the safe and healthy growth of children.
If the child intends to challenge, it should be dealt with seriously and let him know that the boundaries cannot be crossed, which is also the process of forming rules.
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1. Do not make moral judgments. For children's rebellious behavior, parents should not label their children as disobedient, ignorant, emotional, and weak willpower, but should use a developmental perspective to see that adolescent rebellion is a normal phenomenon that everyone has. At this time, in the communication with the child, it is necessary to pay attention to reducing the moral judgment of the child, and do not let the child make a mistake or have some inappropriate behavior.
If your child has adolescent rebellion at the age of 12 to 18, you should be happy because they are stepping into the ranks of adults, growing up and sorting out their self-awareness, the process is relatively long, but it will always pass.
2. Understanding and tolerance. The more rebellious the child, the more parents need to have peace and stability. At this time, it is important not to judge the child's behavior with right or wrong, but to give them more understanding.
For example, when a child does not do well in exams, don't automatically assume that the child is not working hard enough, and don't blame him as soon as he sees a drop in his grades, but say, "I know you're under a lot of pressure and you're working hard in your own way." "Parents' tolerance will create space for children's psychological growth, so that they can precipitate their emotional feelings to the greatest extent, and then better transform their behavior and way of doing things.
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At the age of 13, children are prone to rebelliousness, so it is best to combine home and school. Collaborate and communicate with teachers at all times. Find out what your child will be like during the learning process.
At any time, you should read books and learn about the education of children in early adolescence, and it is best to combine knowledge and practice and apply what you have learned.
If the child does not do things in the right way, the adult will stop it, which will cause the child to lose his temper. In fact, parents need to think from the perspective of their children, and their children will not know that their methods are not good if they have not tried it. Therefore, in the absence of danger, you can let the child experience it appropriately, try it, hit a wall, and then reason with the child, and the child will be more aware and willing to accept.
As children grow up, they will inevitably do the wrong things. If parents only know how to blame their children, they will be more rebellious and disobedient. Therefore, when the child does something wrong, what parents should do is not to blame the child, but to understand the child, patiently ask why he is doing this, and help him analyze the consequences of doing so, so that he can realize the seriousness, learn how to solve such problems in the future, and regulate his emotions.
If you want to know more about your child's education, we recommend consulting Boworth Future Education. Boworth Future Education has a brain science and psychology curriculum research and development team, Harvard University, Stanford University, Peking University, Chinese Academy of Sciences and other brain science and psychology PhDs jointly composed of a scientific research and development team, with more than 150 cognitive teachers, more than 100 psychological counselors, and more than 200 family education teachers. Based on the theory of psychology and brain science, the course includes three series of courses: cognition, strengths and psychological parenting, providing professional and scientific high-quality family education services for Chinese families, helping parents relieve parenting pressure and build a harmonious and happy family.
Measure the root causes behind your child's problematic behaviors
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A 13-year-old child is disobedient. It is necessary to strengthen education, but the prevention and control methods of education are particularly important, and it is recommended to give priority to exhortation, telling children to study hard, not to do wrong things, and to cooperate with school teachers, so that the two-pronged approach will be better.
Never resort to radical violence. Otherwise, the child is prone to rebellion, and then it is easy to do stupid things, which is even more detrimental to the child's growth, so parents must pay special attention to this.
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Hello, disobedient, do you want to think why disobedient, is it because it is too naughty? Then you have to think about who he listens to, you can let that person communicate with him, or make some small rules, such as disobedience, will restrict watching cartoons, and if you are disobedient, you have to write more homework and so on.
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A 13-year-old child is disobedient, probably because he has entered a rebellious period, and he must not use a strong method, but choose a milder method, coupled with psychological education.
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13-year-old child, if you are not obedient, don't beat him, don't scold him, guide him slowly, otherwise he will be afraid of you in two years, and the opportunity will be very crazy.
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For 13-year-old children, children at this age should not fight if they are not obedient to education, otherwise children will have a rebellious mentality.
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Summary. Hello, this age is the child's psychological rebellious period, and it is the vigorous period of adolescent sex hormone secretion (contrary to women's menopause), so parents should pay attention to guidance and less criticism and scolding. Encourage and persuade children to educate them, even if they do something wrong, they should be lenient, and blindly blaming and criticizing them is not conducive to the growth of children's character.
What happens if a 13-year-old boy is disobedient?
Hello, this age is the child's psychological rebellious period, and it is the vigorous period of adolescent sex hormone secretion (contrary to women's menopause), so parents should pay attention to guidance and less criticism and scolding. Encourage and persuade children to educate them, even if they do something wrong, they should be lenient, and blindly blaming and criticizing them is not conducive to the growth of children's character.
I couldn't communicate with him, so I ignored me at all, and I was so angry that I had nothing to say.
I had no culture in the first place, and I was in a hurry.
What should I do now?
Please teach me, I'm dying of anger, I used to be a very obedient child.
I don't know what to do.
Teacher, please come down. Hello, this is normal for boys to reach puberty, prone to tantrums and self-assertive.
Does he have cousins or siblings? Make it easier for peers to listen to persuasion, or you find his good friends, invite his good friends to eat or something, get closer, and it is best to have a private contact, so that your child's usual movements, his friends will know and tell you, and you should always tell your children to enlighten him in the way of friends, instead of messing around together.
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1. Lead by example and set an example.
Children in the rebellious period don't like big truths, they always say big truths and they understand them, but they don't do it like that. Parents should learn to set an example for their children in terms of details, so that children can learn from themselves as much as possible.
2. Be a good listener.
When children reach a certain age, they will have their own ideas. However, if parents are not good at listening at this time, it may cause children to resist, which may lead to children who may not be willing to express their thoughts in the future, forming a vicious circle.
3. Try to communicate.
Communication with children is also an art, parents should actively learn and master the method of communication with children, communicate with their children in a timely manner, and grasp some of the growth of children. When a child is disobedient, parents cannot be more rude. You can try to communicate with your child, understand his thoughts, and then guide him on how to deal with his bad temper.
4. Don't criticize or scold roughly.
When children have unreasonable requirements and practices, the first thing parents should do is to explain the reason to their children, tell them the unreasonableness, and let the children realize that their behavior is wrong, and why it is wrong. For children who don't like to listen to the big truth, parents can tell some relevant stories to let them understand the truth, explain to their children kindly, and never educate their children in a threatening tone and in a rough way, this is a long-term process, and it will be effective if you insist on a certain amount of time.
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A 13-year-old child is disobedient and may be in a rebellious period. As a parent, you should calm down, mainly focus on guidance and education, reason with your children more, be more patient, and don't take a tough way to discipline, otherwise it will backfire and make your children become more and more disobedient, so parents should adjust their mentality and don't be too anxious.
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1. Take the initiative to communicate effectively with your children. Children at this age feel that many things are their own privacy, and they are often reluctant to communicate with parents and teachers, so parents and teachers should take the initiative to communicate with their children. However, parents and teachers must constantly remind themselves that the purpose of communicating with their children is to share their worries, not to argue with them.
In particular, you should not give advice to your child in a condescending manner, but should give advice to your child in a consultative tone. In this way, there can be a more pleasant communication atmosphere, not only parents and teachers can have in-depth conversations with children, understand children's real thoughts, and give advice to children, but children are also more willing to communicate with parents and teachers, and accept reasonable suggestions from parents and teachers.
2. Encourage and assist children to solve difficulties. Children of this age are in the junior high school stage, the knowledge points of junior high school are many, difficult, many children have encountered relatively large difficulties in learning, and even some children with excellent academic performance in primary school will also have the problem of declining grades when they enter junior high school, so the frustration in learning is an important reason for many children to have rebellious feelings at this stage. Teachers and parents should encourage and assist children to solve difficulties, specifically to do these three things:
Clause. 1. Analyze the reasons for the failure to improve the academic performance with the child, especially let the child understand that there is no problem with his learning ability, but the learning method and learning attitude need to be improved; Clause.
2. Put forward some suggestions to children to improve their academic performance, such as: effective preview before class, timely review after class, and methods to improve the efficiency of listening to classes; Clause.
3. Plan the goals of the high school entrance examination with your children, and set small goals in the short term according to the learning situation at each stage, guide your children to achieve the phased goals step by step, and gain motivation and self-confidence from learning.
3. Help children relieve and release stress. Children at this age will face the challenge of the high school entrance examination, which serves as a diversion for students, so that students with high grades can continue their studies in high school and have more opportunities for higher education, while other students will enter vocational schools to prepare for employment. Therefore, the high school entrance examination is a difficult test for children, and everyone's academic performance will gradually widen the gap in junior high school.
Therefore, the pressure of high school entrance examination and competition is an important reason why many children have rebellious emotions at this stage. Teachers and parents should help children relieve and release pressure, especially not to use scores as the only criterion for evaluating children, not to criticize and blame children because of children's poor grades, but to let children understand that everyone has their own advantages and strengths, even if they fail the high school entrance examination, it doesn't matter, as long as they have a positive heart, they can get the opportunity of higher education through hard work. At the same time, teachers and parents should also analyze their own strengths and strengths with their children, and encourage children to develop their strengths and avoid weaknesses, and strive to further expand their strengths and achieve better development.
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