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The child is thoughtful, and it is impossible for him to do what you say and he will do what you want.
Disobedient, not easy to discipline, it's just that you don't do it the right way for him.
Try to honor him and reason with him when he is quiet.
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When the child is always disobedient and not good at discipline under your education, you have to start to reflect on your own problems, whether there is a problem with your education method, so that the child is so disobedient. When the child's correct cognitive personality has not yet been formed, it needs the correct guidance of parents, if you just blindly criticize but do not tell the child what to do is right, then even if he knows that this is wrong, he does not know what to do, so it will be like this next time. That's why you will always feel that the child is disobedient.
Also, it's important to set an example, if you always ask your child for something you can't do yourself, then of course he won't listen to you. If you want your child to become obedient, you must start from your own education method, find the key to the problem, do your best, and then guide your child correctly, and you can't blindly use violent methods to educate your child.
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Many parents are very strict with their children and belong to the controlling parenthood, that is, they have to listen to whatever they say. For example, in the playground, if you say 5 minutes to go, you have to walk for 5 minutes, and you can't stay any longer. At home, when you have a job, you must let the child quiet down and stop playing or talking, otherwise you will scold the child.
That is, this type of parents will put their children at a level lower than themselves, they do not treat their children as equals, children cannot have emotions, they must obey themselves, but if they only look at the children in front of them to listen to them or not, right? In order to make the child obedient, is it okay to beat the child, and in order to make the child obedient, can we use all kinds of punishment, intimidation, and verbal abuse? Do you have to disrespect your child in order to be obedient?
I think that the purpose of raising a child must not be to cultivate a child who can only be obedient, such a child will either be particularly rebellious when he is able, rebel against authority, and challenge the bottom line when he grows up, or he will become particularly obedient and become very mediocre in this life. If we want to nurture our children to become talents, we have to think about the future of our children, and we have to consider the impact of our actions on our children, and look at them from a long-term perspective.
When dealing with children's disobedient behavior, we need to analyze what is the reason behind this behavior.
For example, children like to draw on the wall, so we need to understand what children draw for? Most of them are curious about what it is like to paint on the wall, and explore the feeling of painting on different materials, so that we can paste wallpaper, or take them to paint on the wall with water outdoors, or paste a large whiteboard on the wall, etc., or let them paint, and wait a few years to repaint the wall These are all ways to protect children's priceless creativity, these are really for the sake of children, and now the way to solve problems from the perspective of children is what parents should really learn.
If in order to avoid not letting them draw, they take some punishments, or use bribes such as small safflowers, or let children calm down in a small dark room, think about what they are wrong, and if they don't want to understand, they can't come out, etc., these methods will have a bad impact on the children's hearts, they don't understand why they can't paint on the wall, they don't understand that they are full of joy and draw their own works but make their parents angry, they can't understand why their parents are like this, I will only think that my parents don't love me anymore.
So, before we think about how to make the child obedient, please think about what is the real purpose of the child doing this, and what can we do to meet these goals of the child, or better meet these purposes?
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The more children are educated, the more disobedient they are: unprincipled parental discipline, condescending parental attitude, and excessive emotion when disciplining children.
1. There is no principle of parental discipline.
When parents discipline their children, unprincipled and easy compromise will make the child test the parents without interruption, and when the child finds that disobedience will not have any effect, the child will regard disobedience as a very normal thing. Parental discipline is unprincipled, and children's behavior is not properly restrained.
2. Parents' condescending discipline attitude.
When parents discipline their children, they tend to adopt a condescending educational attitude, which will make the child's rebellious psychology more serious. The child is in rebellion against the strong attitude of his parents, and will express it through disobedience. The parents' ungroundedness makes the child's rebellious psychology more prominent.
3. Excessive emotion when disciplining children.
Some parents will be overly emotional when disciplining their children, and the problems that can be solved by reasoning have become venting for their own emotions because of emotionality. Children are affected by their parents' emotions, and their behavioral constraints are more likely to be ignored and they cannot control their emotional management.
When parents are angry at their children's behavior, do not discipline their children, which can easily become emotional venting and lose the meaning of education. The child's self-esteem is hurt and he is even more reluctant to communicate with his parents. And if the parents are emotional, the children's emotions will also be affected.
The head of the house can appropriately divert his attention and reason with the child after the mood calms down.
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Hello dear dear, I'm happy to answer for you, in my opinion, children's thinking is not the same as our adults, they sometimes want more of us as parents care rather than always reason with him, at their age, they are still buried in the state of not knowing anything, of course, while caring, instilling some good ideas in them, it will be easy for them to accept.
Of course, the more reasonable the child, the more disobedient the child is, it may also be because of improper communication methods: when parents communicate with their children, they often only give instructions unilaterally, or the tone is too tough and not gentle enough, causing the child to feel the pressure and burden, and then produce disgust and rebellion.
Or it's your child's emotional problems. Children may be emotionally unstable due to a bad mood or other influences, resulting in a lack of patience and understanding, and an unwillingness to listen to their parents.
Personality problems in children. Children have different personalities, some are more stubborn or willful, and are unwilling to listen to the advice and opinions of others, including their parents.
and a lack of trust and understanding between parents and children. If the child feels that the parent lacks trust and understanding for them for a long time, it will affect the child's attitude and behavior towards the parent, resulting in the child's reluctance to obey the parent's authority.
For these reasons, there are a few things parents can do to improve the situation. Change the way you communicate to be gentle, understanding and respectful. Try to think differently and put yourself in the child's shoes. At the same time, we can also build a relationship of trust and understanding with each other in our daily lives. In addition, parents should also be flexible when educating their children, find the most suitable way for their children, and carry out benign guidance and education.
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Sometimes, parents may find that when they try to educate their children with reason, their children behave even more disobediently. This may be due to the following reasons:
1.Ineffective communication: Parents may not really understand their child's thoughts and needs and are simply passing on their own opinions. In this case, the child will feel that their parents do not really care about them, and they will be more rebellious.
2.Frequent nagging: Parents use too much moral education, which makes children feel bored and tired. Too much moral education will cause children to have a rebellious mentality, but it will not only be conducive to children's growth.
3.Ignoring your child's emotional needs: Sometimes, your child's disobedience may be because they are seeking the attention and affection of their parents. When parents ignore their children's emotional needs, children may get their parents' attention by being disobedient.
4.Inappropriate educational methods: Parents may have used inappropriate educational methods, such as blame, punishment, etc., rather than educational methods based on understanding, love, and support. This kind of education may make children resistant and more disobedient.
5.Overprotective and spoiling: Overprotective and spoiling can lead to a child's lack of autonomy and responsibility. When children encounter difficulties and setbacks, they may choose to run away rather than face them positively.
To avoid this, parents can try the following:
1.Listen to your child's ideas and needs and establish effective communication.
2.Use the principle of enlightenment and travel education in moderation and avoid frequent nagging.
3.Pay attention to your child's emotional needs and give them love and support.
4.Adopt an educational approach based on understanding, love, and support.
5.Cultivate children's sense of autonomy and responsibility, so that they can learn to face difficulties and setbacks.
Yu knows, invades and deletes.
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Children are disobedient and always say they don't listen, which often makes parents angry, and the solution is to beat. In fact, should disobedient children be beaten?
It should be played, but it should be played with skill and skill. And it can't be used often, hit once to let him remember, play a punitive role, as long as he says to hit him in the future, he won't dare to be useful, if he always beats the child's skin, it will be counterproductive.
So what do you need to pay attention to? Parents should not hit their children when they are angry, because when they are angry, parents can easily lose their minds, and it may have unpredictable results. When beating, you need to calmly tell your child what is the reason for hitting him, not because he is angry with his parents because he picks up letters, this is the main purpose of beating.
And the skill of hitting is to hit it painfully, not too much, not too much.
If the child is disobedient, should he be beaten.
Children are disobedient and always say they don't listen, which often makes parents angry, and the solution is to beat. In fact, should disobedient children be beaten?
It should be played, but it must be played with great skill and skill. And it can't be used often, hit once to let him remember, play a punitive role, as long as he says to hit him in the future, he won't dare to be useful, if he always beats the child's skin, it will be counterproductive.
So what do you need to pay attention to? Parents should not hit their children when they are angry, because when they are angry, parents can easily lose their minds and have unpredictable results. When you beat, you need to calmly tell your child what is the reason for hitting him, not because your parents are angry and you are beaten, this is the main purpose of beating.
And the skill of hitting is to hit it painfully, not too much, not too much.
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If the child is disobedient, the following methods should be used to adjust the symptoms:
1. Actively analyze why the child is disobedient, such as whether it is the instructions issued by the parents, the behavior itself is wrong, or the words are insincere, and the child does not set a good example for the child, or the child is rebellious, enters adolescence, and has a sense of independence.
2. Parents and children can be friends, but the premise is mutual respect and positive communication, express their feelings to each other, express their thoughts about each other, parents have ideal child performance in the book, and children also have ideal parent images in their minds.
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If the child is disobedient, as parents, we should educate him well, first of all, we should give him a little majesty, and then give him a little sweetness, that is, if we do things, we should let him know the mistake first. Then my great-grandchildren will give him some more benefits, and in this case, he will feel very reasonable. Retreat from the difficulties, learn well, and then Qi Pai Chain must develop good habits.
Cultivate children's interest in reading.
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Introduction: When the child is disobedient, it is necessary to educate the child, but we must educate the child through appropriate methods, do not use disobedience to see whether the child is a good child, you must know that if the child is too obedient will cause a lot of problems, we must first understand what causes the child to be disobedient, find the reason for the disobedience, in order to better help the child to solve, but also learn to think from the child's point of view, choose a peaceful attitude to educate the child, At the same time, parents should also be a good role model, so that they can help their children solve the wrong problems.
When the child has disobedient behavior, parents must avoid taking rough methods, in addition, many parents are difficult to control their emotions, especially in the face of children, once they see their children make mistakes, they are very angry, and they will use rough methods to educate children, it is easy to make children very afraid, and it is easy to make children rebellious.
Parents should also strengthen communication with their children, have effective conversations with children, understand what children think, and learn to listen to children's ideas in this process, because many times parents do not understand children's leniency, because they always judge children's behavior with an adult's thoughts, it is easy to have conflicts with children, it is easy to feel that children are disobedient, if you can really consider the problem from the perspective of children, then you will also understand children. Solve the problem by being cautious and reasonable.
Finally, you must know that educating a successful child is not a fight, but is taught through reasonable and scientific education methods, so parents must pay attention to their own education methods, and never beat and scold their children from time to time, otherwise they will let the children grow up and may be accustomed to solving problems in a rough way.
As the children grow up, we grow old. The child's rebellious psychology can never be dealt with in a very balanced way, because after all, the rebellious psychology is very rebellious. So what to do if the child is disobedient? In the face of disobedient children, parents can change by the following 5 points: >>>More
If the child is not obedient in education, it may be that our attitude is too tough and we teach the child very harshly; We need to alleviate appropriately, listen to their opinions more, let them make changes, and slowly come to us to talk.
What should I do if my child doesn't listen to his parents? This problem should be dealt with from the child's three age stages, and the child's disobedience before the age of 3 can be solved by appropriate beating; 3-6 years old by ignoring him to solve, only disobedient, he does not agree to any request; It is important to listen to your child over the age of 6 and let your child experience obedience.
This is a social problem, I always complain about the society, it is the education that has gone wrong, we all came from that big, at that time attached great importance to ideological education, it was the other extreme, but this kind of problem is rare. It is a common problem that the current education lacks ideological education, ideal education, moral sentiment education, labor education, life goals, hardships and hard work, and only wants to teach well in books, be able to do problems, and ask for results. Freezing three feet is not a day's cold, overkill must be overkill, it is not possible to take fierce medicine, there is a school in Lushan, you can ** this disease, it is a problem with the soul, there is a sage once said that sweat can wash the soul, practice has also proved this, people like Zhenyi can be transformed, but we don't have this condition, my young master I can't help it. >>>More
What should I do if my child doesn't listen to his parents? This problem should be dealt with from the child's three age stages, and the child's disobedience before the age of 3 can be solved by appropriate beating; 3-6 years old by ignoring him to solve, only disobedient, he does not agree to any request; It is important to listen to your child over the age of 6 and let your child experience obedience.