What are the general reasons for an ex husband to find an ex wife?

Q: It has been two and a half years since I divorced my ex-husband, and I finally divorced because I often had a cold war for his mother.

He recently came to me and said he couldn't let go of me and the child.

But he also said that we can't be together, because I don't get along with his mother, he told me not to marry, he doesn't want other people to possess me, I don't know what kind of mentality he has?

I feel that he has not met the right person in the past two or three years, and treats me and the child as a spare tire, please help me analyze, what are the general reasons why my ex-husband is looking for an ex-wife?

Little Fat Brother replied:

After reading this story, I have two responses:

On the one hand, in response to the so-called "What are the general reasons for ex-husbands to find ex-wives?" ”

The reason is simple, there are several of them:

This ex-husband didn't find anyone who could be his new wife, so of course he found his ex-wife, which is very convenient;

Or, the ex-husband feels that finding his ex-wife is very sure and there is no difficulty;

Or, the ex-husband doesn't have to pay any cost to find his ex-wife, anyway, he has children as a bond, etc.

All in all, there is nothing to respond to this "so-called reason".

It's like anyone who looks up and can see the sky, is it blue? Or gray? Or white?

It's just that I'm willing to admit it.

There are many things in our lives, in fact, we have seen it clearly, but we always don't want to admit it.

As the heroine said when she asked a question, I feel that he hasn't met the right person in the past two or three years, and he treats me and the child as a spare tire", things are already so clear, what else is there to analyze?

The so-called analysis is nothing more than for us to act as an external force, to give her a confirmation, to give her an affirmation, to tell her: "Yes, your feeling is right, you are a spare tire".

On the other hand, I would like to talk about possession.

I myself strongly dislike the word "possession" because "possession" is essentially a barbaric way of subsistence in a jungle society.

I don't think one real person can be possessed by another.

It is possible that one person can possess the body of another person, just as one person can occupy a house.

But one can never possess another person's mind.

Even if one person can tie the other person's feet, it is impossible to tie the other's hearts.

As I once read a poem by Rumi, I liked it very much, and it is attached below.

I hope that those of you who also have little feeling or even a little resistance to the word possession, read this poem, and I think you will resonate with me as much as I do.

A Gift for You

You didn't know it would be so hard to choose a gift for you.

Nothing seems to fit.

Why send ** to the gold mines, or water to the oceans.

Everything I think of is like going to the East with spices.

Give it to you my heart, my soul, to no avail, because you already have it.

So, I brought you a mirror.

Look at yourself and remember me.

The illustrations in this article may not be used in part or in whole by any organization or individual without permission.

I think there are many reasons why an ex-husband comes to his ex-wife, maybe he regrets it, or he feels that he is not getting married after the divorce. It may also be that there is still an ex-wife in my heart, and I am reluctant to part in the end. Whatever the reason, if you still love each other, you can reconcile, and if you don't love each other, you can refuse and start a new life.

It's usually because the two of them still have feelings, and the ex-husband hasn't forgotten his ex-wife, so he always takes the initiative to find his ex-wife.

The first is not to have trouble, the second is to have economic **, the third is to miss the children, the fourth is to miss the feelings and miss the ex-wife, etc., in fact, I think that if you are divorced, then you should be decisive, don't procrastinate like this, but cause some harm to both parties.

Generally, most of them are not very good with their ex-husbands, and they only know how to cherish them after they lose them, and they do realize their mistakes, but most of the men like this are very cowardly and very unproductive, so they will look for you.

Under normal circumstances, the ex-husband goes to get back together with his ex-wife, taking into account the child's feelings and wanting to give the child a complete family, after all, the child is not wrong, and it is also possible that the ex-husband has the intention to change his mind and realize the mistake of the divorce.

<> ex-wife often asks her ex-husband for help when she has something, how to understand it?

If after the divorce, the ex-wife still asks her ex-husband for help in some trivial matters, it means that he has not let go of his ex-husband at all. I think of my ex-husband whenever I have something, and I am used to the days when my husband is around. He now has no husband.

I wanted to do something, but I couldn't find anyone to help. I thought my ex-husband would help him, so I went to find my ex-husband. I do not know.

Why did the two of them get divorced? If a woman doesn't want a divorce, it means that she still wants a chance. Contacted my ex-husband in the hope that he would remember him.

He still has a desire to get back together. If the woman wanted to divorce herself, she probably regretted it a little.

Can't accept help from your ex-lover? This is not a one-size-fits-all question. Scoring on a case-by-case basis.

After the divorce, if my ex-husband's help is for our common children, then I will accept the other person's help. My children are not my only ones, their growth is inseparable from each other, and who is also responsible for providing a better life for their children. If I have difficulties with my child and the other person is able and willing to help me, I will accept it.

But if it weren't for the help of the child, I would have refused. The beginning and end of our relationship were shattered. Now that I have divorced and started a new life, no matter how difficult it is, I will not accept the help of the other party, let the past go with the wind and let it be.

Because the wife and ex-husband have children, it is also human nature that they cannot be prevented from having normal interactions. Ask questions often and don't know what it means. No matter how often, I think that as long as it affects my husband's mood, or he thinks that he can't accept it psychologically, he can put forward and express his opinions to his wife and her ex-husband.

A normal relationship between a wife and her ex-husband is psychologically unacceptable to the current husband. As a wife, she should also understand this, but she cannot ignore her husband's psychological feelings. Therefore, the relationship between the wife and the ex-husband, even if it is because of the children, needs to be moderate, that is, it will not affect the normal marriage and family life of the current husband and wife.

Since the two of them have divorced, if there is something, don't often go to your ex-husband for help, if you contact often, it means that he regrets it after the divorce and wants to get back together with his ex-husband.

Because he didn't let go of his ex-husband at all, and he was used to the days when his husband was by his side, he would still find the other party if he had any problems.

This shows that there are still feelings between the two of them, they still haven't let go of each other, and they still want to get back together.

Legal Analysis: It doesn't matter. The spousal relationship has been legally dissolved.

Legal basis: Civil Code of the People's Republic of China

Article 1069:Children shall respect their parents' marital rights and must not interfere with their parents' divorce, remarriage, or post-marital life. A child's obligation to support his or her parents does not end when there is a change in the marital relationship between the parents.

Article 1076:Where both husband and wife divorce voluntarily, they shall sign a written divorce agreement and apply for divorce registration in person at the marriage registration authority. The divorce agreement shall clearly state the parties' expression of intent to divorce voluntarily and the consensus on matters such as child support, property, and debt handling.

Article 1077:Within 30 days of the date on which the marriage registration authority receives the application for divorce registration, if either party is unwilling to divorce, he or she may withdraw the application for divorce registration from the marriage registration authority. Within 30 days after the expiration of the period provided for in the preceding paragraph, both parties shall apply in person to the marriage registration authority for the issuance of a divorce certificate; If the application is not made, it shall be deemed that the application for divorce registration has been withdrawn.

Article 1078:Where the marriage registration authorities ascertain that the parties have indeed divorced voluntarily and have reached a consensus on matters such as child support, property, and debt disposition, they shall register and issue a divorce certificate.

Article 1079:Where one of the husband and wife requests a divorce, the relevant organization may conduct mediation or directly initiate divorce proceedings in the people's court. People's courts hearing divorce cases shall conduct mediation; If the relationship has indeed broken down and mediation fails, the divorce shall be granted.

In any of the following circumstances, if mediation fails, a divorce shall be granted:

1) bigamy or cohabitation with another person;

2) Committing domestic violence or abusing or abandoning family members;

3) Having bad habits such as gambling and drug addiction that they have repeatedly taught and not changing;

4) Separated for two years due to emotional discord;

5) Other circumstances that lead to the breakdown of the relationship between husband and wife.

Where one party is declared missing and the other party initiates divorce proceedings, the divorce shall be granted.

Where, after a people's court has ruled that divorce is not permitted, the parties have been separated for one year, and one party initiates divorce proceedings again, the divorce shall be granted.

My uncle and aunt are so good to their daughter-in-law: they divorced their son, and their daughter-in-law came back to admit it.

My uncle's family was relatively poor at the beginning, and my son couldn't marry a daughter-in-law locally, so someone looked for a girl in Dashan Township in our county.

The girl's parents died and she had no sisters or brothers, that is, an only child, and a grandfather.

This child didn't play boyfriend at the beginning, saying that he couldn't afford to marry for fear of being angry in the future, and at the same time, his grandfather was not easy to settle.

My uncle shouted: Grandpa is your dowry, if you come to find me.

This child is a person who has suffered in the mountains, and he is a good hand when he marries out to do farm work, and he plays barefoot board all year round, and the foot board is thick enough to step on glass slag and thorny firewood and grass; In the hot day, at two or three o'clock in the afternoon, the cow grass is still cut on the slope; Throughout the year, it is rare to rush to the market and visit the ......

Uncle and aunt praised every skinner: My family is the ancestor who showed the spirit, and I just happened to meet such a good daughter-in-law!

But their son, who went to learn the art of home decoration with others, was used to seeing a beautiful Chinese girl, and the more he looked at it, the more disgusted his wife was like an old woman, so he publicly brought a woman back, planning to force his wife to divorce.

The uncle grabbed a hoe and chased his son all over the slope.

The son simply did not settle down, bought a house directly in the county seat, and gave birth to a child with the wild girl, and claimed that he was not afraid of suing "bigamy".

When the uncle saw that the matter was irreparable, he said to his daughter-in-law: You stepped into the door of the Jiang family, and added blood to the Jiang family, and your name was entered into the genealogy of the Jiang family. Hell, I just think that the son is dead, you bring me a husband in, and you two will send me two sons to the end in the future.

waited until things calmed down for a while, and the grandfather who brought it passed away during this period, and finally someone matched the matter of recruiting a son-in-law.

The daughter-in-law finally said to her parents-in-law: In order to avoid embarrassment, I want to marry her.

In this way, the uncle and aunt made the daughter-in-law's wedding as if they were marrying a daughter, and appeared as a father-in-law and mother-in-law. This is something that ordinary father-in-law and mother-in-law can't even imagine.

Later, of course, the blood continued, and the uncle's son also returned to his ancestors; The son knew that he was disappointed, and he also acquiesced in his ex-wife to recognize his parents as her parents.