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I believe that many parents sometimes promise their children some things when they get along with their children in their daily lives, but often they can't do it later, so many parents ask what kind of impact will be caused to their children if they do not abide by their agreement with their children. I think it will have a lot of bad effects on children, first of all, children may no longer trust their parents, and secondly, children may become like their parents, and they may not be able to do what they say.
I believe that many parents know that parents have a very great influence on their children, it can be said that parents are the teachers in the child's family, what the parents are like, what the child is like, for many children to imitate their parents is one of his nature.
Therefore, if parents often make promises with their children in the process of getting along with their children, and do not fulfill them in the end, I think the impact on the children is very great.
First of all, if the parents have made a promise to the child before, but did not do it, the child may forgive you for the first time, but you have given him some reasons, but after the second and third time, the child often no longer trusts you, no matter what promise you say to him in the future, he is holding a half-believing attitude, looking at you may still doubt you in your heart, but you don't say it.
I believe that everyone knows how painful it will be if the child no longer trusts his parents, the child will not tell his parents anything, because she does not trust his parents, and the child will not tell his parents if he does something wrong, because he feels that the parents will not be on his side, and once the child lacks a sense of trust with his parents, then the relationship between the child and his parents will become more and more distant.
Secondly, I believe that everyone knows that parents are children's teachers, children are originally imitating parents, if parents are a person who says they can't do it, you think about what kind of person the child will become, and he may become a person who can't do it in the future.
If he joins the work in the future and promises a colleague a thing, but can't do it on the second day, and promises the boss that he can't do it on the second day, what kind of consequences will he have in the end?
So I hope every parent can know one thing, either don't commit to their children, or promise to do it, otherwise the impact on the child is very bad.
I hope that every parent can fulfill their promises and will definitely do what they say, which is the most important point. I also hope that everyone can care about their children's feelings, not just their own.
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It will increase the sense of distance between the child and the parents, make the child begin to distrust the parents, and may even take the parents as an example to develop bad habits, and the parents must abide by the agreement with the child.
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How does it affect the children if they don't keep their promises with them? I think it will have a lot of bad effects on children. First, children may no longer trust their parents. Second, the child may become the same person as the parents.
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Making children feel that they can casually break their appointments is not conducive to cultivating children's integrity and commitments.
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1. Failure to keep the agreement with the child will make the child question the reality of the world.
For younger children, some parents think that their children are still young and don't understand anything, so there is no need to abide by the agreement with their children. However, when we make promises to our children and fail to make appointments, it will confuse them and make them not know how to face the world. When psychologists studied 3-year-olds, they found that children at this age firmly believe in what adults say.
Because, the child's knowledge of the reality of the world is initially the first of the parents.
When children first come into this world, they are like a piece of drawing paper, and their parents' words and deeds are like colors left on paper. When parents don't talk or act, the child's sense of security is undermined. As a result, children become confused, and they begin to question everything around them and question the reality of the world.
2. Not abiding by the agreement with the child will make the child emotionally broken.
Imagine if we had a bridge and we had an appointment with our partner to hang out together on the weekend. When the weekend comes, your partner suddenly says to you, "I'm so tired today, I don't want to go!" "Are we also angry and sad?
When adults are no-shown, they will lose control of their emotions. Then, when the child is faced with the failure of the parent who he sees as the most important dependence, the child's disappointment and helplessness can be imagined. Because a child's ability to accept various events is limited, it seems to us that sensitivity may be a small thing that can lead to an emotional breakdown.
This is undoubtedly a harm to the child's growth.
As parents, we should help our children learn how to manage their emotions instead of pushing them to the brink of an emotional breakdown in the first place. When we make a commitment to our children, we must first consider whether we can do it.
3. Failure to abide by the agreement with the child will make the child learn the behavior of not abiding by the agreement.
When parents give their children an agreement, they will honor the agreement at the appointed time, which is the process of teaching children what an agreement is. If parents can keep the promise every time, then the child will understand that the promise is an unbreakable and unbreakable promise. On the contrary, if the parents themselves often fail to make appointments, then the child will think that the agreement can be broken and broken.
Over time, the child develops the habit of not keeping promises and becomes a person who does not keep his word.
Whether parents abide by their agreements with their children determines whether they will raise their children to be a person who is trustworthy and responsible for society and life, or whether to raise their children to be a person who is untrustworthy and unable to keep their promises, and the final decision is in the hands of parents.
Therefore, parents must think twice before making an appointment with their children. Promise with your child, either don't talk about it, and if you do, you must work hard to do it. In case you can't do something urgent after the promise, you must inform your child in advance, and after sincerely apologizing with your child, you can calm your child's emotions and negotiate with your child about follow-up remedial measures.
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In order to coax their children, parents often promise some things, and then forget about it, not keeping the agreement with the child, it seems to be an inconsequential little thing, but growing up to bring more harm to the child than you think.
First, the child will question the reality of the world. For the child's growth, every minute and every second of his life is learning everything that is happening around him. And children's initial understanding of the world, a lot of cognition of society, feelings about society and the value of the world come from their parents.
Therefore, parents are the most important teachers for their children. Studies by psychologists have shown that children at the age of 3 believe in the words of adults, even if adults are telling lies. Therefore, the child's understanding of the reality of this world is initially more boring than that of the parents.
Therefore, when you make promises to your children and fail to make appointments, they will feel confused and do not know how to face the world.
Secondly, the child will be disappointed. The child's first "rebellious period" appears at the age of 2. It's not that the child will really rebel, but that the child has entered an emotionally sensitive period.
At this age, children begin to experience a variety of emotions, but they are not able to manage their emotions and emotions well. As a result, it is often the case that emotions are out of control. For example, rolling on the ground, howling and crying, no matter how much you persuade you, you can't stop.
In addition, children's receptivity is limited, and sometimes a small thing can lead to a child's emotional breakdown. Therefore, the disappointment of the child who is the most trusted and trusted parent can be imagined.
Furthermore, the child learns to behave uncovenantly. Parents give their children an agreement, and when the agreement is fulfilled at the appointed time, this is the process by which the child learns what is called fulfilling the agreement. If, every time a parent keeps a promise, then the child has learned that a "promise" is a promise that cannot be violated.
Conversely, if parents break the appointment every time, the child learns that the "agreement" can be violated at will, and there are no undesirable consequences when it is violated.
Therefore, in the long run, the behavior of parents who do not abide by the agreement will not only make the child no longer trust his parents, but also make the child become a person who does not believe in his word.
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The agreement between parents and children is based on mutual trust and respect. If parents fail to keep their agreement with their children, they will have the following problems:
Loss of trust: Children may perceive their parents as not taking their agreements seriously and lose trust. This can lead to a loss of trust in the child, which can affect the relationship between the parent and the child.
Influencing the child's behavior: If the parent is unable to keep the agreement with the child, the child may feel that it is not necessary to keep his or her commitments. This can lead to a child's misconduct, which can affect the formation of his personality and values.
Breaking family rules: Family rules are agreements and regulations between parents and children. If parents fail to keep their agreement with their children, it will disrupt family rules and order, which can lead to family disharmony and tension.
Therefore, it is very important for parents to keep their agreements with their children. This not only fosters mutual trust and respect, but also helps children develop the right values and codes of conduct. If parents fail to keep their agreement with their child, they should apologize to the child and explain the reason to compensate for the impact on trust and relationship.
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If parents always do not abide by the agreement with their children, this is really not good, it will have some impact on the child's future learning, parents are the role model for the child to learn, if the child does not keep the promise, then the child may also become a dishonest person, when they communicate with others, the failure to keep the promise will also make others very sad, will affect the child's interpersonal communication.
People often say that a promise, if parents have made some agreements, and the child is closely related, then parents should carefully abide by, and also work hard to achieve, if they do not achieve the agreement with the child, then the parent's behavior is also dishonesty, if it is at the social level, parents are the legendary "lai", such people in life is almost everyone shouts, people will be very urgent, Therefore, in the family, if parents promise some things to their children, they should also be firmly satisfied, and do not give up the agreement with their children because of their own selfish desires, which will only have some negative impact on the children, and the children may not keep their promises when they get along with others in the future, then the impression of others on the children is not very good, which will affect the children's interpersonal communication, so the children may not have some friends around them when they grow up.
If the parents always do not abide by the agreement with the child, then in the child's heart, the parent has become a dishonest person, no matter what the parents say in the future, the child will not believe it, and will even often refute the parents. Some children will also deceive their parents, this behavior is very bad, children in the early years of the development of deception of the bad problem, then when they grow up may cause very serious consequences, maybe after the child has their own family, they will also have some dishonest behavior on their children, the son does not teach the father's fault, so the child has any mistake may be the fault of the parents, so for the sake of the child, for their own reputation, we must keep our promises.
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This is particularly bad, it will leave a bad impression on the child, and it will also make the child feel that the parent is not a trustworthy person in life.
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If it is not good, it will make the child feel that it is okay not to abide by what he says to others in the future, and it will make the child become a person who does not keep his word in the future.
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Of course it's not good. This kind of behavior can easily make children distrust their parents and can easily lead children to lie.
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