After marriage, I found out that my husband is a very controlling person, should I divorce him?

Updated on psychology 2024-07-27
18 answers
  1. Anonymous users2024-02-13

    First of all, the current era is all free love and free marriage, not pre-liberation, or even ancient, arranged marriages, where you don't know each other before you get married, and you don't know each other. This sentence should not be asked after marriage, but before marriage. Before getting married, look at him clearly, and think about what kind of life you want in the future, and what kind of person you should accompany in such a life.

    If you see clearly before you get married that he is a very controlling person, and you can continue to be in a relationship with him, you must put up with him from then on, obey him, take his preferences as his preferences, his thoughts as thoughts, and his dislike as disgust......If so, you are also very happy, and you decide to marry him, then after marriage, continue to maintain this pattern.

    <> it's very uncomfortable to marry such a person. His or her desire for control manifests itself in all aspects of life and work. For example, what kind of meal you want to eat today, he will ask every detail from grocery shopping, washing vegetables, and cooking to follow his steps or ideas.

    For example, if you want to take a bus to a place, he will tell you what time it is, where to wait for the bus, how to take the bus, and so on. You have to get his consent for what you want to do, and you have to obey him unconditionally. If you are a very independent and assertive person and combine with this kind of person, it will not last long anyway.

    But if you're obedient, a hands-off shopkeeper type of person who doesn't want to work many things, that's fine. Anyway, I don't want to bother my brain, you can do whatever you say.

    People with a strong desire to control are formed under the guidance of their own sense of crisis, and they are a comprehensive manifestation of their words and deeds. That is to say, because a person has a strong sense of crisis, his words and deeds in life are manifested as a strong desire to control others. This kind of behavior is manifested in:

    Physical confinement, violent beatings, verbal threats, suppression of opinions, imposition of ideas, verbal warnings, outrageous tempers, etc.

    It is a kind of sadness to marry a person with a strong desire to control, people have three emotions and six desires, the relationship between husband and wife is based on mutual trust and equality, mutual respect and love, if he has a tendency to control you, control your body, your emotions, such a day is too sad, as if you have lost your freedom, it is not recommended that you live with such a person,

  2. Anonymous users2024-02-12

    It depends. My friend's husband is a very possessive and controlling person, but he can control rationally, although sometimes he will be jealous and angry, but he is a small spice of life. So it's up to you to see if you can control it properly.

    Of course, this is a normal person's situation, if it is a psychological problem, it is better to divorce as soon as possible.

  3. Anonymous users2024-02-11

    I think if you have more control than you can tolerate, you can take the next step, because if you are too controlling, you will be limited in many things.

  4. Anonymous users2024-02-10

    Don't be in a hurry to divorce, first of all, you should communicate with your husband, express your thoughts, and let him correct it slowly.

  5. Anonymous users2024-02-09

    I don't think you should get divorced. Although he is very controlling, you can change this habit of his. You will be very happy in the future.

  6. Anonymous users2024-02-08

    If your husband is paranoid and has a strong desire to control, then this time will indeed bring you some great trouble and pressure. If the relationship is not handled well, it will also affect your own safety, so divorce is also the best choice at this time. But don't blindly choose to divorce, it depends on the specific situation to see if you and the other party can still save the relationshipYou can try to look at the problem from the following aspects.

    In fact, in real life, we will find that everyone's personality is different, so for those who are paranoid and controlling, they will indeed be aggressive. At this time, whether to choose divorce or not should depend on your feelings for each other, if the other party often has domestic violence, then divorce is the best choice at this time. <>

    If the husband and wife have been together for a long time, then at this time it is just because the husband is paranoid and irritable, then at this time there are actually some ways to guide each other. Slowly cultivate the patience of the other party, learn to manage the relationship well, and can also make the other party change, so that you can also consider not divorcing. <>

    In fact, people's personality is difficult to change, so we must look at it rationally, on the one hand, if the other party has made the sincerity to change themselves, no longer paranoid, no longer irritable, then at this time can actually accept the other party. But if the other party repeatedly does something to hurt himself, then he should make a rational judgment at this time, and maybe choosing divorce at this time is also the best choice to better protect himself.

  7. Anonymous users2024-02-07

    If your husband is very paranoid, you can choose to divorce at this time. Because living with such a man will make everyone very scared in their hearts. Because men with such a personality may also have a tendency to domestic violence, it will also affect everyone's physical health.

    Living with such people will also make everyone lose their freedom and happiness. <>

    It may be that many guys are very good at disguising before they get married, and they don't expose their bad temper. However, after marriage, some men become very paranoid, and some even have a very strong desire to control. When the wife talks to other people, they will also get very angry and even do something to the wife.

    After meeting such a man, it may make everyone feel very scary, and you can choose to divorce at this time. Because in this way, the damage can be minimized, and at the same time, it can also allow everyone to change their lifestyle. Living with such a man will also make everyone very unhappy, and at the same time, it will also make everyone's emotions very depressed.

    There are also some female friends who think that after getting divorced, they may be reluctant to give up their children. When this happens, you can raise your own children. Because such men may have violent tendencies in their lives, and even beat their children.

    This may also have a particularly big impact on the child, so try to bring your own child as much as possible. But it can also be very hard when taking care of children, not only to work hard, but also to take care of children. So female friends, you must think clearly at this time.

    Most girls look at each other's temper before getting married, and they are worried that they will encounter domestic violence. However, there are some people who do not expose these problems before marriage, so you must spend more time with them before deciding whether to get married. In this way, you can also understand another person better, and at the same time, you can also make your mind more mature.

    If you encounter domestic violence after marriage, you must not tolerate it in the future, and you can also choose to solve the problem through legal means.

  8. Anonymous users2024-02-06

    I don't think you should choose divorce, because although he is more controlling, he also loves you, and you can communicate with him well.

  9. Anonymous users2024-02-05

    I think you should communicate more with your husband at this time, when he talks about his views on marriage, but sees that he becomes more approachable and gives him enough security in the marriage, so that he will slowly change, I don't think divorce will get you rid of him.

  10. Anonymous users2024-02-04

    Personally, I think that if he has these situations, then you must divorce him, otherwise you may be hurt.

  11. Anonymous users2024-02-03

    My husband is paranoid and controlling, and sometimes he feels terrible, do you think I should get a divorce?

    Some people are very paranoid and have a desire to control, so what should I do?

    First, there should be no divorce. You should help your husband find more ways to identify with himself, and what he needs in his heart is your absolute loyalty to him. Whether it's praising him, seeing him, encouraging him, affirming him, you can lower his presence by controlling you; Instead of confronting his control in a confrontational way, understand first and then communicate.

    When you do both, your husband's emotions will gradually become rational and less willing to communicate and control.

    Second, divorced women must avoid men who have a strong desire to control. The sooner they leave, the better. Otherwise, their lives may be in danger.

    Once a man's strong desire to control deviates from the woman's behavior, he may beat the woman. Marriage should be a reasonable constraint on the parties, not a constraint on the freedom of the parties. Any marriage that makes you feel bound is problematic.

    It's better to solve these problems. If you can't solve these problems, divorce is the only way to set you free.

    Third, there should be no divorce. Your husband's controlling behavior is never your fault. The need to control others often comes from insecurities and inner weaknesses, and the reality is that if you want to stop this behavior, your husband must address the root cause of his own behavior.

    However, an important part of this process is not allowed to continue without control, and it is understandable that many women never resist their husbands' controlling behavior, as they prefer to avoid confrontation and conflict.

    Fourth, to do this, you need self-confidence, which is often lacking if you are trapped in a controlled marriage. If you lack self-confidence, your first step is to find ways to rebuild your self-confidence. So find a place where you can make yourself strong enough to solve problems with your husband in other areas of life.

    You have your own opinions and decisions. You need to face, manage, and accept your emotions and keep growing yourself.

  12. Anonymous users2024-02-02

    I think you should get a divorce because such a husband is very extreme and may do some terrible things, so you should stay away as soon as possible.

  13. Anonymous users2024-02-01

    I think it should be, being with such a person will only make me more restrained and make my emotions less stable.

  14. Anonymous users2024-01-31

    You should choose divorce, because it is very tiring to get along with a controlling man, and such a man is also very extreme, especially easy to do something that everyone does not understand.

  15. Anonymous users2024-01-30

    I have a strong desire to control my husband, is this a good thing for my husband? The desire to control her husband is very light, and it is not a good thing for her husband. Some men complain that their wives are so controlling that they don't feel the slightest freedom in their marriage, and even men get into violent arguments with their wives because of it, which is common in real life.

    Many men believe that they and their wives should be equal, that they should have their own lives and that they should not always control each other. Therefore, it is difficult for men to understand why their wives have such a strong desire to control, which is why men are dissatisfied with their wives in their marriages. In fact, everything happens for a reason.

    First: women are insecure. For many women, their strong desire to control their husbands is mainly due to their insecurity and their feeling that their husbands will leave them at any moment, so they have a strong desire to control.

    In real life, some women don't feel their husband's love for them, they can't feel their husband's sense of belonging to the family, and even suspect that their husbands will change their minds at any time. In this case, the woman will control everything about her husband. Men should think about how to give their wives enough security, how to make their wives feel loved, and only after men think clearly, they can make their wives less controlling and make their marriages happier.

    Second: women's lack of self-confidence. Everyone's upbringing is different, and even everyone's own abilities are different, so everyone has different levels of self-confidence.

    Many women have a strong desire to control their husbands because of their lack of confidence in their marriage. Some women feel that they are not beautiful enough, some women feel that they are not in good shape, and some women feel that they are not taking good care of their husbands in life, so they think that their husbands may leave them. In life, she should pay attention to the relationship between herself and her husband, but at the same time, women should not see feelings as the whole of life, but should learn to live their lives.

    When a woman is confident enough, she can reduce the desire to control her husband and make your husband feel at ease as well.

    All problems in marriage have a certain cause, and only by finding the cause can the marital problem be solved. Only in this way can the husband and wife maintain enough harmony, which is a reality that everyone should understand after getting married. After the husband discovers that his wife has a strong desire to control in the marriage, the man should regulate his words and deeds from the reasons for this situation, soothe his wife's soul with emotion, and make each other's marriage happier.

  16. Anonymous users2024-01-29

    Personally, I think this is not a good thing for the husband, because if the desire to control the husband is too strong, then it will definitely make the other party feel a lot of pressure.

  17. Anonymous users2024-01-28

    Yes, this is a particularly good thing for the other party, I feel that I have married a particularly obedient wife, and I have also married a particularly well-behaved wife.

  18. Anonymous users2024-01-27

    It's not a good thing, because it can have a very serious impact and a lot of problems.

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