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Parents are the first teachers of children, and family education plays a vital role in the growth of children and the formation of personality. As a parent, we must attach great importance to it, and the following is a list of some wrong education methods, I hope everyone can understand in advance, so that they can reasonably avoid it when educating their children in the future.
Wrong way of homeschooling 1: Packaged.
Some parents are very eager to let their children become dragons and daughters become phoenixes, and in order to let their children study seriously, they arrange the work that their children should do within their ability. As a result, the child lived a life of opening his mouth for food and stretching out his hands for clothes. As time goes by, children become more and more dependent on their parents, and even get used to their parents' contributions, and take all this for granted.
Wrong way of homeschooling 2: Blow-type.
In family education, children are always beaten and scolded, children are denied, and their children are compared with other people's children, this kind of education may make children lose love and hope for the family, and even children will learn these irritable and violent bad habits with their parents, which will affect the healthy growth of children.
Wrong family education method 3: laissez-faire.
Some parents think that "free-range children can fly better", and then completely ignore their children, which is actually a responsible way of education. Parents ignore their children's inner world, hobbies, academic skills, etc., and even disrupt their own behavior in front of their children, children are easily infected with some bad habits, and parents will regret it.
Wrong family education method four: doting type.
Parents regard their children as their sweethearts, and they cannot let their children suffer a little "grievance", obey their children's requirements, and even meet their children's improper requirements against social morality. This has also led to the growth of a group of selfish and willful little emperors and little overlords. Over-spoiling of children will also make children feel that their world has been disturbed by their parents, and the child's living space will feel compressed, thus losing the opportunity for special development.
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Hitting and scolding children, spoiling children, etc. Because scolding a child will make the child become timid and afraid, and spoiling the child will make the child become lawless.
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The first is to tolerate some of the child's shortcomings or bad habits, such as choosing to tolerate when the child beats and scolds or is a picky eater, and parents often quarrel in front of their children, or fight in front of their children, or often beat and scold their children.
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Controlling Discipline:
When a child is crazy and lies on the ground screaming, the controlling parent will come and say, "I'm counting 321, you get up."
What will happen to children under controlling discipline when they grow up?
Children will go to two extremes:
Either he will control others, because he grew up in a controlling relationship, then the way he learns to get along is to control others; Either he will lose his motivation and become cowardly, unassertive, and listen to others in everything.
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1. Educate children to be calm.
It may seem simple, but it's very difficult to do. Adults are already physically and mentally exhausted because of the pressure of life and work, and most parents will be impatient and reprimand their children loudly because they are afraid of being forced to obey their parents' will, but fear and understanding the truth are completely different for the results of education. Even if it's hard to be calm with naughty children, parents have to be patient and stay positive at all times!
Don't sigh and complain in front of your child, and you can't have a trace of negative emotions, otherwise your child's sensitive heart will suffer a huge impact.
Second, you must set rules for your children.
As the saying goes, "no rules are not a circle", you can't let your child be happy and reckless, and give whatever you want. Children should be made to understand what they can and cannot do, and they should also help adults clean up the dishes after eating, help clean up the house on weekends, etc., and gradually cultivate children's self-discipline through these small things. Once the rules are established, the adults must fulfill them together, and the mother must not be strict and the father does not care, so that the child will keep looking for the father to meet his needs, and the habit cannot be formed, and the rules will be self-broken.
3. Cultivate children's good reading habits.
For children, reading more books can cultivate children's interest in learning, increase knowledge, exercise language and writing skills, and also help to cultivate personality and establish lofty ideals. From an early age, let children insist on reading for 1 hour a day and write a reading experience, and in the long run, the child's harvest will be a lifetime.
Fourth, give appropriate encouragement.
Good boys really grow up to applause." Children have very strong self-esteem and want to be praised by their parents and teachers, as well as envied by their classmates. Most children like to be competitive, and test scores are the most direct indicator of their personal ability.
Some children with good grades prefer to attend tutorial classes, not only to improve their knowledge structure, but also to enjoy the feeling of standing out from the crowd in tutorial classes. Therefore, educating children should be more encouragement and less criticism, as long as children are willing to learn, their grades will be able to improve, and family education will bring twice the result with half the effort.
5. The power of parental example.
Yu Minhong said in a lecture that "the quality of a mother determines a child's life". Because most Chinese families are mothers with children, children spend the most time in contact with their mothers, and they are also the most easily affected. Although it cannot be said that a good mother will definitely bring out a good child, it is certain that if the mother is not good, the child must be bad.
Of course, there is not only the mother in family education, but only the mother's single-parent family, and the child's personality will also be distorted. Children can learn to care for and care for others from their mothers, and understand what kindness is; Parents are indispensable to learn to be strong, brave and problem-solving from their fathers, and if they want to educate their children well, parents must work together.
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Using words to hurt others, using violence and other educational methods, language will hurt children's young psychology, will cause children's self-esteem to hurt, violent education, make children reduce their trust in their parents, and will behave radically in the future.
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1. Too compromised, tolerant everywhere, and even tolerated on moral issues, easy to raise children with criminal personality 2, too harsh, and constantly beating and scolding will make children hate their parents, although children do not hold grudges, but they are not good impressions.
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Especially doting on children, and at the same time being particularly irresponsible to children, taking care of all the knowledge of children, not cultivating children, and not paying attention to the child's rebellious period, and at the same time family education is particularly rough, and so on.
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For example, when conducting family education, they often choose to beat and scold, and often belittle their own children, often compare other children with their own children, or often hit children's self-confidence and never approve of children.
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Introduction: Nowadays, many people pay more and more attention to family education, and there are many wrong ways in family education, the most important thing is that the communication problems between children and parents generally lead to some contradictions, such as parents' desire to control is very strong, and the process of communication with children is basically based on criticism, and they do not understand the requirements of children, and pour all their thoughts into their children. There are also many parents who will see their children as another self, and they hope that their children will become dragons and phoenixes, and they hope that their children will do many things that they can't do, and once the children do not complete the goals in their parents' hearts, they will beat and scold their children.
There is also too much belittling of children, often comparing children with children in other families, thinking that their children are not as good as other people's children, and in the long run, it will also make children have a self-abandonment mentality.
Some parents are always worried about their children, worrying about their children's life, work and socialization, etc., in fact, for children, parents' emotions can affect their children. There are also some parents, they encounter a lot of problems in work and life will be reflected in their body, at this time the child will return home to see the parents' sad face, is to make the child have great psychological pressure, feel that they are not good enough, so that the parents are so unhappy, for a long time will also make the child reluctant to go home, but also let the child have some rebellious psychology.
Some parents will have a strong desire to control when educating their children, when the child has the opposite behavior or words to the parents' opinions, at this time the parents can not control the inner impatience, well, it is easy to scold the child's behavior, so that the child will have a certain rebellious psychology for a long time, in fact, many times it is not the child's fault, but the child has his own ideas, at this time the scolding does not play any role.
In fact, in the child's life, especially when the child has his own life circle, parents should respect the child's wishes, reasonable arrangements for the child's life and learning, because in this period it is necessary to ensure that the child can smoothly interact with other peers, but do not delay the child's learning, because the interaction with peers when the child is young can exercise the child's ability to deal with relationships, if parents can correctly guide the child, establish a good interpersonal relationship, It is a personality that can develop children.
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The wrong method of family education is to spoil the child, obey the child all the way, quarrel with the child and cause the child's fear, often beat and scold the child, and compare it with other people's children.
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Blindly blaming children, beating and scolding children, putting excessive pressure on children, making children have too much mental burden, not creating a good family atmosphere for children, and parents do not set an example for children.
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Excessive spoiling of children, putting too much pressure on children, being strict with children, constantly suppressing children, and excessively praising children are all wrong.
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In the process of education, you should also ask your child's thoughts, don't make decisions for your child in everything, and don't keep yelling without listening to your child's ideas, don't criticize your child all the time, let alone let your child participate in cram school all the time, don't beat and scold your child.
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The education method of beating and scolding, the education method of spoiling, the education method of negative emotions, the compulsory education method, the indulgent education method, etc., these education methods cannot be used.
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The way of hitting the child, the way of scolding the child, the way of insulting the child, the way of corporal punishment of the child, these methods cannot be used, because it will hurt the child's self-esteem and will also make the child hate his parents.
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I don't think you should use overwhelming education, because it will cause great psychological pressure on the child, and it will also cause the child to have an inferiority complex.
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I think the most unsuccessful factors in family education are mainly manifested in the following points:
1. Doting. Nowadays, there are more single-child families, and parents and grandparents are afraid of hurting their children. Some parents and children are more than ten years old and bring the face wash water to them every day, and even some parents have to help their children wash their faces and take a bath, so that it is not a good child, but a harm to the child.
As the saying goes, you can't see a rainbow without wind and rain. Children can only become lazier and more dependent if they do not go through the tempering of life.
2. Ignore and let things go.
Nowadays, young parents in rural areas are working outside the home in order to make a living, and it is the grandparents who really take care of their children. However, due to the general low culture of the older generation, the ability to counsel children is relatively lacking, so they can only treat children naturally, so that children naturally lack corresponding guidance, resulting in children deviating more and more from the trajectory of life.
3. Upward and downward effect, lack of self-discipline.
Although many parents seem to be very strict with their children, when it happens to them, they have long forgotten about it. For example, some parents don't let their children play with their mobile phones, but they sit on the side and keep playing; Can it convince children to read books and watch TV by themselves or play with their phones in the living room?
We say that teaching by example is more important than teaching, how can children do it if they can't do it themselves?
4. Keep your mouth open and constantly bless negative energy.
Some parents never pay attention to right or wrong when they speak, do not pay attention to whether it is beneficial to their children, and say whatever they want, so that if they let their children live in that environment for a long time, they will naturally be imperceptibly affected. We say that writing articles should have positive energy, and it is the same in a family. For example, there is a parent who often likes to mention in front of her children who she has been bullied by in the past, and rarely hears her mention who has done good and beneficial things in society, and does not know how to let her children learn from whom people.
Children naturally accept more and more negative influences, so how can they cultivate an excellent talent?
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The wrong education method is that parents condescendingly educate their children, have too many restrictions on their children, frequently praise their children, care very much about their children, and blame their children throughout the whole process.
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