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Don't waste your life thinking about others.
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Then put down the grievances, so that they will be eliminated naturally
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1. Divert your attention, when you are resentful, you may wish to leave the scene for a while, change the environment, or participate in cultural and sports activities to dilute the bad emotions and restore the calm and stability of the mood; State Kai.
2. Confide in others, relatives and friends, and confide in them the grievances and unhappiness in your heart, which will often make your mood immediately turn from yin to sunny and eliminate resentment;
3. When there is resentment in the heart, you should recall positive and optimistic things, which can eliminate the resentment in your heart to a large extent;
4. Learn to be indifferent, don't be blind because of trivial things.
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Summary. I think the first point is not to force yourself to let go of resentment. We can imagine our sensibilities as a naïve and clumsy child.
The child's likes and dislikes are particularly distinct, and if he is victimized, he will definitely be very sad and angry. At this time, if we forcibly suppress him and ask him not to have emotions, we are essentially "repaying grievances with grievances", which is like blocking the gas valve of a pressure cooker with force. It may be calm on the surface, but it may be boiling on the inside, which will only make the resentment more solid.
I think the first point is not to force yourself to let go of resentment. We can imagine our sensibilities as a naïve and clumsy child. The child's likes and dislikes are particularly distinct, and if he is victimized, he will definitely be very sad and angry.
At this time, if we forcibly suppress the code and ask him not to have emotions, the essence of Yinwei is to "fight late and repay grievances", which is like blocking the gas valve of a pressure cooker with force. It may be calm on the surface, but it may be boiling on the inside, which will only make the resentment more solid.
It is better to block than to slacken, so we need to allow ourselves to face up to our resentment and express it. There are many people who "dare to be angry but dare not speak", only allow themselves to hate in their hearts, but cannot resort to their mouths, or when talking about the matter of dust shouting, they must express that they are not resentful, not blamed, and not hate. But in fact, the envy of brother Ashigami cannot face up to resentment or even deny resentment, which will only make it last longer.
To accept your true self, it is very important to accept yourself as if you are not a good brother, not beautiful, and not right. If I hate now, then I am like this, I allow myself to exist like this, but at the same time I am trying to move towards not hating.
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1. Always be grateful.
We can't choose our parents, but we can choose our own attitude towards life. The world is so big, without parents, there would be no us, and the grace of birth and nurturing is greater than the sky.
Compared to the life given by the parents, ideologically"Imperfections"It seems insignificant. Even if our parents don't do well, we must always be grateful, because often remembering the warmth given by our parents can help us resolve some of our dissatisfaction and resentment.
Second, you still need to rely on yourself on the road of life.
In the TV series "It's All Good", Su's mother can smash pots and sell iron for her son's schooling, and even sell her house, but Mingyu just wanted to spend money to enroll in a tutoring class, but was ordered to stop by Su's mother, and finally Mingyu ran away from home with grief and anger.
Many years later, Mingyu is already a gold collar in the workplace, and she has walked out of it on her own"Sunshine Boulevard"Financial freedom is achieved, and when there is material abundance and spiritual independence, the past grievances and hatreds will also be alleviated.
Third, the bell must be tied to the bell.
As the saying goes, the palms of the hands and the backs of the hands are all meat, even if the parents have the idea of preferring sons over daughters, I believe that they also love to refer to their own daughters.
Since you have a problem in your heart, it is better to sit down with your parents, talk openly and honestly, tell your parents your thoughts, and at the moment when you "release your suspicions" and hug your parents, all the complaints and hatred will be resolved.
4. Seek professional help.
When you have a long-standing grievance in your heart, when you can't solve it alone, it is better to seek professional help.
You can find a psychologist or psychological counselor, and under professional guidance and resolution, complaints and hatred will also be well resolved.
Mu Guiying is in command, and Hua Mulan is in the army for her father, this series of allusions all tell: Who said that women are not as good as men.
Some scholars believe that no matter whether it is a boy or a girl, since they are fathers and mothers, they should give the same love to their children, and in this way, it is what a qualified parent should do.
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