If my husband is not motivated, should I get a divorce?

I would like to discuss it from three perspectives: a personal perspective, a friend perspective, and a social worker perspective.

1) Personal perspective.

As someone who once chose to break up because my ex-boyfriend was not motivated, I chose to divorce on this issue. It's my personal choice.

I used to think that he was motivated because I chose his ex, but in the end, I realized that those were his words, and in essence, he didn't want to try to change his life. The good examination is to read the book 1-2 weeks before the exam, and none of the results can be passed. It wasn't until the moment of the breakup that he said that he didn't want to make a lot of money, he just wanted a little bit of his salary to be enough in addition to daily life.

The fundamental reason is that our families are not wealthy, and our parents are not able to provide financial support, we all need to struggle, if we choose comfort at the age when we should be struggling, it will be difficult to raise a family and have children in the end. <>

2) Friend perspective.

A good friend of mine lives in a town in a second-tier city, and her husband and she both have a stable job, and her husband doesn't think about more ways to make money, and he enjoys resting at home more during the holidays.

She is an only child, her parents have a house and also bought her a house, and they also bought a car. Her parents help her take care of the children and also have a pension. Such a life is not very rich, but the basic life can be satisfied.

Her husband is very good to her, and he is still very considerate and listens to her for so many years. Therefore, there is no reason for divorce in such a marriage. <>

3) Social Worker Perspective.

I have been a social worker for 6 years and have seen many family disputes and conflicts. A family's economic prosperity can reduce a lot of conflicts. Because most of the problems in life can be solved with money.

I would follow up with the person who asked this question, what is her real heart's need? And what does she value about her husband?

Is not being motivated the most important part of yourself, and is making money more important than other things? If the answer is yes, then she already has the answer in her heart, and it is very possible to choose divorce, the key is whether she can take this step bravely. The social worker does not tell the client how to choose, but listens to her and helps her to sort out her inner choices.

There are some people who also aspire to be financially rich, but in the end, they figured it out, that is their own expectation, and it is good to work their own. For the husband's requirements, it is more about companionship and thoughtfulness. Then just let go of your expectations of your husband, and you'll be fine.

So, there is no marriage that should be divorced, but what do you need most? With this in mind, the choice becomes simple.

If he is not motivated enough, first of all, we should encourage him, believe in him, and try everything we can to make him go to work, ordinary people are just decadent for a while, not like this for a lifetime, if there is really no way to change, then it should be divorced.

No, you can wake him up. He couldn't have been lazy forever.

No, it's not a matter of principle, divorce is a bit too serious, you can choose to take a way to educate your husband and make him more attentive.

Here's how to do it:

1. Let him correct it.

It is very important for men to be self-motivated, men should focus on work and career, and they will work hard if they are self-motivated, rather than being content with the status quo, and they must know that happiness comes from hard work.

2. Communicate well with him.

If your boyfriend doesn't understand well, you must communicate with him patiently and tell him that you value a man's self-motivation very much, which is more important than appearance and family background.

3. Find a stable job.

If his current job is not stable, negotiate with him to change to a more stable job, and tell him to insist and not change jobs frequently.

4. Tell him about the future arrangements.

Tell him your future arrangements, how to plan the two-person world, and give him the motivation to struggle, and he will definitely be tempted when he hears such a beautiful arrangement from you.

5. Give him a little time.

If he admits his mistakes and is willing to correct them, please give him a little time.

Unmotivated men are often not very motivated before marriage, and you still choose this man, then you have to pay half of the responsibility for your choice, and you can't blame all the men. If you can't leave this unmotivated man, and you want him to become motivated, then give up blaming and blaming the other party, and replace it with recognition and encouragement.

If your husband is not motivated, idle, does not work all day, and is very confused about the future, for such a marriage, you should still divorce, because a man is not motivated, for such a marriage, there is no meaning to exist

If your husband is not self-motivated and can't see the future, there is no need to divorce for such a marriage. If your husband is not self-motivated, you should go and enlighten him well instead of choosing divorce.

Divorce is not recommended, although your husband is not motivated, but he has not grown up yet. You can grow up with him, sometimes one person needs another person to lead, and slowly your life will have hope, give him more time.

If you love your husband, you should ask him to be motivated and help him find a way, instead of thinking about how to divorce.

I suggest that you try to help your husband first, and if your husband really doesn't want to improve, you need to assess whether the two people need to divorce.

In real life, some boys are indeed very unmotivated, and at the same time do not have the corresponding sense of family responsibility. In such cases, a woman's life is usually very hard and she also needs to take care of the whole family. For a daughter, no one will like an unmotivated man, and at the same time, they will think that there is no hope in the life of two people.

I suggest you try to help your husband first.

I don't know what your husband's personality is, and I don't know why he is not motivated. In most cases, if you can try to encourage your husband in the right way, most men will be aware of their problems and will take the initiative to take care of their own family. If your husband is an introvert, try to build his confidence as much as possible.

If your husband is a person with a weak sense of responsibility, we can tell him what we think through communication. <>

You also need to assess whether two people need a divorce.

As I said above, if you think that your husband is indeed a very unmotivated person and does not seek improvement, you need to assess the realistic conditions of divorce between two people. For you personally, you need to further consider the issue of child custody for two people as well as the issue of financial conditions. If both of these issues can be resolved, the two of you can divorce because of this.

You also need to live your life well.

In a marital relationship, some women will put too much energy into their husbands, and at the same time, they will be too demanding on their husbands. I suggest you try to reflect on your own behavior, as you put more energy into yourself, you will find that you expect less and less from others. To some extent, it is impossible for two people to go well together, and if you can find common ground while reserving differences, there is no need for the two of you to divorce abruptly.

It's long time gone for a divorce, this situation may be better for your own life, not only is there no happiness with him, but you also have to worry about his affairs, the most important thing is that people still don't appreciate it, why do you keep this kind of person.

You should get divorced, because for a person who is extremely unmotivated, does not want to listen to the opinions of others, and lives a mess, such a person does not deserve sympathy, and it is not worth entrusting for life.

Divorce. Living with such a person will make you feel very tired, and you may even feel insecure, and the two people will eventually part ways, at this time you should solve the problems of the two people, and you should also go through the divorce procedures.

With the continuous development of social economy, in real life, we will encounter a variety of problems and a variety of situations, especially in real life, if your husband has not been self-motivated, do you need to consider the issue of divorce, but also make many friends very puzzled by this, in fact, we have to know that if your husband has not been motivated, then we can really consider divorce, because such a marriage is not what you want, Then it's very uncomfortable to go on.

First of all, we have to understand this problem, that is, if this kind of marriage is not what we want, and my husband has not been self-motivated, then I think we should choose divorce, only by choosing divorce can we solve this problem, and at the same time be able to get everything we want, which is very important and essential for ourselves, of course, if my husband can change, that is the best.

In fact, we have to know that marriage is for two people, not one person, if the other half of oneself is not self-motivated at all, then even if such a marriage is maintained, it does not have any meaning for oneself, so in the view, if two people are not suitable, then choosing divorce will be a very good way, and at the same time, it can also let the other party know what kind of person he is, and can also let himself find the meaning of his life value, and at the same time let himself live the life he wants, which is very important for me and very good.

To sum up, we can obviously know that love is for two people, not one person, if one person is not willing to live with each other, then the other person must consider whether to change this problem, especially for men, a man must be responsible, must be self-motivated, and work hard to give his other half a better life.

Divorce should be considered. Because the other party is not motivated at all, living with such a man will make you feel particularly tired.

I think you should consider divorce, after all, with him, there is no good happiness for the two of you.

I don't think you should get a divorce, first ask your husband if he is in any trouble, see if you can help him solve it, and then observe his behavior in the future.

After getting married, you can give your husband a period of time and let him adjust slowly. At work he can complete his tasks, you can encourage him slowly, and he will excel. If you communicate with him, he still stays as he is.

If you don't work hard, you can choose to divorce him. There is no hope with such people.

In marriage, if the husband is not motivated, less and less want to work, and does not want to make money to support the family, this situation should first be communicated well, and if it is corrected, it should be cultivated well, as far as possible, there are no principled problems, and do not go to divorce.

If your husband is becoming less and less photogenic, unless his family is financially advantageous. Otherwise, then you have to press him. If he is still like that, then you will not see the future.

Because it's an irresponsible performance. Divorce is the best option.

I don't think there is a need for divorce, the reason why he is not online is because he may have encountered some peace at work, so that he has no way to change some things better, or should slowly understand him and enlighten him.

If your husband becomes less and less motivated after marriage, then you should really divorce him, and if you continue like this, it depends on your own efforts, then you can't afford it, so you should propose it to him. Let him correct it.

Maybe it used to be such a person, but you didn't see it clearly. It's just that he got married, and he was content with the status quo and lived his own little life, and there was nothing wrong with it. After all, everyone has invisible pressure these days!

First of all, you can remind him and let him change, if he doesn't change in the slightest, I think you still need to divorce, because if a husband is becoming less and less motivated, making money will definitely not be active, how to support the family?

After getting married, my husband is becoming less and less motivated, should I get a divorce? If your finances are still passable, you don't need to get divorced, you two work together, everything will be fine, why do you need to know your husband himself?

Everyone has a low period, at this time, as a wife, you should care for him, care about him, and see what causes him to be unmotivated

After getting married, my husband is becoming less and less motivated, I think you should have a good chat with your husband, and don't think about divorce for everything.

should be divorced, because this kind of husband is very unreliable, and this kind of husband is also a very irresponsible person.