Want to see jokes. Where is the better joke network

I searched for it, a lot, a lot of jokes.

**I won't click**, my mother no longer has to worry about my studies, backgammon lighter.

Funny ** or just found one that's not bad.

Snakes, ants, spiders, and centipedes play mahjong at home. After 8 laps, the cigarette ran out. Everyone discussed who to buy cigarettes.

The serpent said, "I have no feet, I will not go, let the ants go." The ant said

The spider has eight legs, more than mine, let the spider go. The spider said, "No matter how many feet I have, I can't compare to the centipede, so let the centipede go."

The centipede was helpless and thought: No way, who let me have more feet? So the centipede went out to buy a cigarette ......It's been more than an hour, and I haven't seen the centipede come back, and two hours later, I haven't seen the centipede come back from buying cigarettes.

The centipede was also anxious and said: Nonsense! You'll have to wait for me to put on my shoes!!

A man with a crippled leg looked at the moon from the roof of the building and said, "It's so tiring to be a human being." Then he said to his classmates, "Okay, push me down." The next day, he died in the hospital. (You know, he was pushed down the stairs by his classmates, so he .......))

During one performance, a classmate was so nervous that he wanted to sing "Lift your hijab", but when it was announced, it was said "Lift your skull".

A man heard a madman by the well saying13 and went over to look at it, but the madman threw him into the well and said, "14, 14."

Students make sentences: Don't eat a fat person in one bite.

Teacher's comment: Fat people must stay away from him.

During a military exercise, a shell deviated very far. The soldiers sent to inspect found that the shells had fallen in the fields, and in the middle of the fields stood you, with broken clothes and a dark face, and with tears in your eyes, saying: "Is it possible to steal a cabbage and bombard it with shelling???

**I won't click**, my mother no longer has to worry about my studies, read Lang brand lighters.

A foreign song and dance troupe came to perform in this city, and on a whim, Director Ma called the bureau office: "Director Xiong, you go and buy two tickets for the song and dance troupe, and ask for the best seats!" ”

Director Xiong received the instructions of the director and did not dare to slack off, but after thinking about it, wouldn't it be too cheap for a director to run errands to buy tickets? So, he picked up the microphone and called ** to the office downstairs: "Xiao Xu?"

You go buy me two tickets for the song and dance troupe, and ask for the best seats! ”

Xiao Xu is a college student who has just been assigned, so he naturally does not dare to shirk the task arranged by the director. But I was busy with a draft report at hand, and I really couldn't get out of it. So, he said to Tingting, who was sitting opposite, in a consultative tone

Tingting, can you please help me buy two tickets for the song and dance troupe? If you want the best seat, I'll invite you to dinner when you get back, okay? ”

This Tingting is a flower in the bureau, relying on Director Ma's favor, no one in the bureau can move her. But she is an exception to Xiao Xu. Tingting likes this handsome college student very much, and often takes the initiative to help him do this and that.

Now when he heard Xiao Xu say this, he readily agreed: "No problem, but you have to explain, are you going to watch a show with your girlfriend?" ”

No, I bought it for someone else! Xiao Xu didn't dare to say that he bought it for the director, he knew that Tingting was very disgusted with the director.

Tingting actually knew that Xiao Xu didn't have a girlfriend yet, and she was just teasing him just now, and when she saw Xiao Xu's face blushing to the root of her ears, she quipped: "Look at you, a college student, and you're so embarrassed." Tingting walked out of the house with her mobile phone and dialed the **:

Director, I'm Tingting, I want to work for you! You can buy me two tickets for the song and dance troupe, okay? Remember, get the best seats!

Sure enough, Director Ma's excited voice came from the other end: "Tingting, we have a good heart!" You don't have to worry about buying tickets, you can come directly to my office before you get off work! ”

It turned out that Director Ma bought two tickets just to take Tingting to the show together. Tingting returned to the office and said to Xiao Xu: "It's done, you just wait to get the ticket!" But don't forget about treats! ”

There was still half an hour before the end of work, and Director Ma summoned Director Xiong to the office and asked, "Where are the tickets?" ”

Director Xiong hurriedly explained: "I have something urgent to do without, and I have arranged for Xiao Xu to buy it!" After speaking, hurry up and ask Xiao Xu to send the ticket to Director Ma's office. Xiao Xu put down the microphone and said to Tingting: "Come and urge to ask for a ticket!" ”

Let's go, get my tickets with me! Tingting led Xiao Xu to Director Ma's office.

As soon as he entered the door, Director Xiong asked Xiao Xu, "Where are the tickets?" ”

Xiao Xu didn't have time to explain, he only pointed at Tingting, Tingting walked up to the director and spread out a small hand: "Lord Director, give me the ticket!" ”

Search; Laughing and joking.

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A stammerer is kidnapped by a robber, who asks, "I can grant you a wish before you die," "Hehe(drink)......."Before he could finish speaking, the robber stuttered and killed him. Before he died, he stammered and said, "Drink.......""Water" stammered and hung up after finishing speaking" <

"Hee Hee Ha Ha", "Goofs", "Encyclopedia of Troubles", "Coming to Fukushima".

"Funny Campus" should be good, or go to the joke network to take a look.

Look at 100,000 bad jokes, it's funny.