Marriage is a model of happiness, is it necessarily the only model?

I think it's the only model where all marital happiness is the most important thing, and if it's unfortunate it's painful for everyone.

Of course, it is not the only model, even if a person is single, he will be very happy, because he lives a very free and comfortable life, and his heart is very satisfied.

Of course, it is not the only model, there are many people who have not chosen marriage, but they can live well and happily by living alone.

Of course, it is not the only model, and there are many marriages that are unhappy, but everyone wants their marriage to have only one model, and that is the happy model.

It must be the only model, marriage is a good model, relatively speaking, it is also the only one, and only by grasping this model can you make your life very happy.

I don't think it's the only model, there are many forms of happiness, it's just which one you yearn for, if you think that being single is happy, then marriage is not the only model.

I don't think it's a certain pattern, because in people's lives, in addition to marriage, there are still some other things that can make you happy.

Of course, it is not the only mode, friendship can also make you very happy, and family affection can also give you great comfort and help.

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The best state of a woman's life in marriage:

01. Marriage is not the whole of life.

Kazuo Inamori: A woman's best state, no matter whether the marriage is happy or unhappy, whether the person next to the pillow is loyal or unfaithful, as a woman, she always understands one thing, marriage is not the whole of life. The second half of his life is not a husband, but an excellent child, a healthy body, and a happy and elegant rest of his life.

In fact, no one fully meets their expectations, not even themselves. Marriage is a practice of letting others go and sparing yourself, if you can't cross yourself, no one can save you, and no one can ......

Writer Chi Li said: If you are a middle-aged woman, there is almost no one around you who can help you. Parents, husbands, and children are all absorbing your energy.

You have to build your own energy self-sufficiency system, otherwise the state will deteriorate. If a woman wants to open it, you will understand that in this world, you are you. You hurt, you hurt yourself, you are tired, you are tired of yourself.

02. Marriage is not terrible, and the worst result is divorce.

Even if someone sympathizes with you, so what? In the end, it's up to you to clean up the mess. Mr. Yang Jiang has a saying:

If you don't agree with your husband, then treat him as an ordinary friend, he can do whatever he wants, don't always think about changing him, the upbringing engraved in your bones can't be changed, don't worry about yourself. ”

A person whose parents can't change, why bother yourself, just use him as a tool, let him make money if he can, work if he can, don't communicate if you can't, just do yourself. If you choose the wrong marriage, you must choose the right lifestyle. Mo Yan once said:

Marriage is not terrible, and the worst outcome is divorce. What is really terrible is getting married, finding that you can't afford to leave, and you can only spend your life in this marriage that you want to escape, but you can't escape.

03. Looking forward to the right person is not as good as becoming the right person.

What about divorce, if you get divorced, will you be able to find someone you are satisfied with? How much effort it takes to get to know a new person, how much effort it takes to tell one's story over and over again, and before you can understand or be understood, you are exhausted ......In fact, the world is a person's world, and no matter who you are with, you have to get ......along with yourselfIt's not so much that marriage is a prison from which you can't escape, but that you can't get out of the prison of your own heart.

What torments you is never anyone's emotions, but your fantasical expectations, everything in the world is ** you, but you are the only one who refuses to let go of yourself. Fate can't help yourself, instead of expecting a right person, it is better to become the right person yourself, you can't change your man, don't torture yourself to change him, it's better to spend time managing yourself and your children. Marriage is just a formality, happiness still depends on yourself, as long as you are good enough, who can do anything to you!

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Is marriage a necessity in life"? First of all, are there any necessary options in life? Yes.

As far as "birth, old age, sickness and death" is concerned, it is the same whether you choose it or not, so there is no need to discuss it. Enjoy the process of life and love every day in the present. All these small things are lucky, and they add up to the blessings of life.

So, is marriage an inevitability of happiness? Love is an eternal topic for human beings, and only love can understand the beauty of gratitude and the harmony of getting along with each other.

As the saying goes, marriage is the highest form of love. But make no mistake about it, marriage is not the only form of love. The data shows:

The number of single people in China has reached 100 million, and the marriage rate has fallen off a cliff for 6 consecutive years. More and more young people, for various reasons, are postponing marriage or choosing not to marry. Why is this happening?

On the one hand, there is the subjective factor: I don't want to get married, or I don't have the conditions to get married yet. On the other hand, objective reasons:

You love me, I love you, that is, "everything is ready only to owe the east wind". But at the banquet, couples continue to live a small life.

Regarding marriage, some people believe that they can share ups and downs, get rid of loneliness, and raise children to prevent old age; Some people think that interesting singleness is better than a marriage that is about to be; Some people think that marriage is a choice in life, not a necessity. This is what I'm going through, and it's something I need to think about. It's really good to get married, after all, "holding the hand of the son and growing old with the son" is what a good picture of life.

However, the premise of marriage is to meet the person you love. This alone is something that too many people (including me) are looking for and can't seek.

Marriage is not a necessity in life, it can be a choice for happiness. But if you don't get married, you must be unhappy? There is no such thing as an "either/or", otherwise the thinking would be too narrow.

Zi is not a fish, how do you know the joy of fish? There are two happy people who are married, and there are many other situations where they are not married. Single, in love, without planning to get married, etc., how is your life?

It's up to you. In my opinion, happiness is "seeking benevolence and benevolence" - mastering one's own life is to have one's own happiness, and marriage is just an option!

This is a summary of my years of consulting experience, and I see how many of you have hit.

Truth one, marriage itself is a hard thing, and every family has a scripture that is difficult to read, but many people will simply attribute some marriage problems to someone's fault, which is a very immature performance. Imagining marriage as too good is a mistake that many women make. When you place too high expectations and give too many demands, when there are contradictions in married life, you can't help but be filled with a lot of grievances.

Therefore, it is very important to treat it with a normal heart, marriage is just a way of life to choose to spend your life with another person, and he is the same as being single, there are pros and cons.

Truth 2, recognizing things and appreciating them can make the family more harmonious. A person instinctively wants to stay away from those who don't like themselves, the characteristics of human nature, that is, they want to be recognized, liked, and accepted, many have come to the verge of rupture, all of which start from accusations, criticism, and abuse, maybe there are a lot of grievances and anger behind the accusation, but criticism and accusation of the other party will only make us abandon each other, or force the other party to stay away from us, but it can not really solve the problem.

Truth three, tolerance and run-in can be described as the norm. There are many people who have compared marriage in this way, marriage is like a plate bite of the land, you have an extra piece here, I will give up a piece there, marriage is not the end of love, but let love enter an upgraded mode, let us regret more and deeply understand each other's love.

There are not so many scumbags in this world, and there are not so many stupid women, and the main reason for most of the problems is because we don't know how to love and how to make ourselves happy. If you want to improve your ability to manage your relationship through learning, I recommend you to study the course in my column, I have summarized the core methods of a happy marriage through a large number of consulting cases, so as to help you improve the temperature of your relationship, shorten the distance between husband and wife, and reshape the intimate relationship. Click on the bottom left corner, let's open the door to a happy marriage together.

Truth 1: Love support is the foundation. In the movie "Journey to the West", Fairy Zixia teased Qingzhi when she touched her, believing that there would be a man who would step on colorful auspicious clouds to marry her, which is her yearning for love.

Perhaps, love is not the only condition for marriage, but it must be the basic condition.

Truth 2: Understanding and tolerance can last a long time. Qian Zhongshu wrote a sentence in "The Siege":

Marriage is like a besieged city, where the people on the outside want to get in and the people on the inside want to come out. "The reason why people on the outside want to go in is because they have good expectations for marriage; The reason why the people in it came up was because they were really fed up and couldn't feel the slightest happiness.

Truth 3: Changing the other party is a nerve. After getting married, many women always want to change each other, thinking that the relationship with each other will last for a long time, but they don't know that it will only have the opposite effect.

A happy life requires a husband and wife to work together. First of all, respect each other, do not make decisions on their own, and make decisions together. Husband and wife are to discuss big things together, understand each other in small things, live together, cherish each other, and respect each other.

Mutual respect and shared decision-making are the foundation for a happy marriage. Secondly, maintaining a relationship with your lover, and caring for and caring for your lover in your daily life is better than a candlelit dinner and a thousand words. Finally, the higher the emotional intelligence of a couple, the more they will understand, appreciate, and respect each other and their marriage, and the happier their married life will be in the future.

Both sides should have a certain level of trust, they should respect each other, and they must have a particularly equal relationship.