How to restrain when there is difficulty in choosing?

Fear of choice, in the final analysis, is caused by not having a clear value appeal for the target thing or having too many value claims. For example, if I want to buy a piece of clothing, I will go shopping after thinking about it, and when I see all kinds of clothes, I always feel that A has A, B has B, and I want to take it away, and I feel that there are shortcomings. The solution is very simple, in the face of choice, what do we want, close your eyes, summarize it, take a look, and take the first one that meets your demands, without continuing to look at the options behind.

For example, I want summer clothes, black clothes, shirts, few patterns, and pure cotton. Well, buy it immediately when you see what it does, and don't think about whether there is more suitable for it, because there is no best thing, only better. In short, overcoming the fear of choice is in seven words:

Clarify and streamline demands.

I went back to the dormitory tonight to read an e-book for a while, but when I opened the e-book app, I spent too much time on selection, so I didn't read much at night. Of course, it's also because I'm a bit demanding about the content of the books I read. Then I remembered that when I was a child, there were only paper books to read.

That's all there are books at home, I don't have to choose, I can only read them when I'm bored, and I really absorb a lot of things in the end. On the other hand, nowadays, when there are more choices, I don't pay so much attention to real reading, but pay special attention to the selection process. There it is"You can not read the book, but the book you choose must be good"This weird psyche.

This attitude is very bad, I have been reflecting on it these days, but there is no special way to do it, I can only make myself less choice. Limit yourself. Sometimes people have unnecessary troubles because they have too many choices.

It will be much more rational to realize this. Therefore, I think that if you want to overcome the difficulty of choosing and solve it at the root, you need to impose many rules and regulations on yourself from the beginning, so that you have no choice, but make the best choice.

Some decisions are very important and have a decisive role in the future life or the lives of others, but because of the fear of taking responsibility, they will fall into infinite anxiety in front of the choice, and they are afraid of unexpected social responsibility and consequences after the choice; This kind of person should strengthen self-confidence and improve psychological endurance, how can it be done, a small decision can not be afforded, life is bumpy, do your best to choose the best result, wrong and no way, increase experience, although understand this psychology, but suddenly still feel how can this be, think about it carefully, it is actually possible, enhance your ability, enhance your self-confidence.

The reason why there is a difficulty in choosing is because I really don't have a particularly assertive performance, basically similar things are put together, each with an appreciation angle, color, style, function, **, etc., often causing trouble, but sometimes the first thing to see, the knife is OK, hesitate for so long, compare countless times, think too much, like it directly to take it, and if you retreat, you will also take away the regret when you buy it.

Difficulties in choosing often come from unclear standards and a lack of awareness of one's own consumption level. When we buy something, we should first figure out our real needs, and then the range of our own spending power. When you are entangled in your choice, you should remind yourself in time that the choice requires a huge time cost.

The difficulty of choosing is really tiring, and it is usually necessary to seek help from others and make quick decisions at this time so that I don't regret it afterwards.

I have difficulty choosing, and when there are two directions, I don't know how to choose, and at this time, I will tell myself that no matter which one I choose, the result will be good, and I must be able to be confident.

For example, if you are struggling with whether to choose A or B, you can choose A first to see how reluctant you are to B, and then choose B to see how you feel about A. If you still can't choose this, then choose the second one, because if you really want to choose A, then you won't like B.

Choice difficulty can follow one's original choice, because everyone's first thought is correct, so that the choice difficulty can be effectively restrained.

If I have difficulty choosing, I will choose a very simple way, toss a coin, and choose whichever side I throw, so that I don't have to be so entangled.

Not being able to make a choice means not being able to connect with real life and feelings, and not being able to face difficult realities. In fact, many people are unable to connect with their emotional world, and must break their own illusions in order to make choices.

Many people in our lives will have a phobia, for many people can not determine the most important need in their hearts, is afraid of choice, which means that we suffer from choice phobia, that is, choice difficulty, then, how can we overcome the choice difficulty in life?

How to overcome the difficulty of choosing

(1) There are no more than two situations faced by the difficulty of choice:

One is to give up, that is, the pants will inevitably lose what is not chosen, so that the loss will make it feel very painful, and no one wants to lose. So it's up to you to choose what you lose control, and that control puts the chooser under pressure to take full responsibility, making them instinctively want to escape from that pressure.

The second is that the result is uncontrollable, many people do not know whether their choice is optimal, everyone wants to be perfect, are eager for the best, this is also the nature of human beings, the unknown with the possibility of pure defeat will make the chooser fall into regret emotions, especially when the result of the choice is not ideal, "I knew that I chose that well, I am so stupid", this unpleasant memory in the past will make the chooser fear of encountering this emotion again when choosing.

(2) There can be two strategies to deal with this situation

The first is to turn the selection process into an analysis process. Some choosers do not think about when choosing, "how should I choose, how should I choose", they are eager to have a choice of results, and hope that the results of their choice are the best, but they do not think of what kind of result will be satisfactory to themselves. For example, if I want to go to the supermarket to buy laundry detergent, this goal is very clear, but not specific, what kind of laundry detergent to buy?

If you want to buy the cheapest, the total price is divided by the number of grams to calculate how much each gram of laundry detergent is used to choose, so as to give priority to meeting the needs you want to meet the most and reduce the possibility of regret. Second, if you have too many choices, you can also use the elimination method to rule out some of the options first.

The second is to turn the selection process into a random process. It means that we don't need to overthink, just rely on intuition, and the result is good luck, which can make us lower our expectations for the result. When you order food, you can choose whatever you want, if it tastes good, it is like winning the lottery, and if it is not delicious, it is like not winning the lottery.

If you eat something that is not delicious, first of all, it is expected, and secondly, the next time you eat a delicious similar food, the contrast is greater and the satisfaction is greater.

After reading the above introduction, we also know some ways to overcome the difficulty of choosing in our lives, we need to understand our real needs in life, and we should not be afraid of the results of our choices.

Nowadays, many people in society have difficulty in choosing, although this is not a major disease, in fact, it is also harmful, so how do we overcome the difficulty of choosing? Below I have compiled for you how to overcome the difficulty of choosing, just for reference!

1. Accept yourself and build self-confidence

Many people who are socially stressed are caused by not accepting themselves and not being confident in themselves, so in order to change, we must first accept and accept ourselves in our hearts and establish confidence in ourselves.

2. Don't be too demanding of yourself

If you pursue perfection too much and demand too much from yourself, you will easily suffer from gains and losses, care too much about what others think of you, and want to be recognized by others, thus losing yourself. Accept yourself as you are, don't care what others think, the more you fear of making mistakes, the more you will feel helpless.

3. Don't worry too much about your body's reactions

Nervousness is always accompanied by a series of physical discomforts, and according to the reinforcement theory, if we pay too much attention to the nervous response of certain parts of our body when we are nervous, it is equivalent to reinforcing our own nervous behavior. Make it step by step'Aggravate. And when we don't pay attention to our nervous reactions, the nervous reactions will gradually subside over time because the tension is not noticed and strengthened.

Fourth, face it bravely

People who are nervous often show avoidance in social situations, fearing that they will make a fool of themselves and do not face it. In fact, running away does not eliminate tension, on the contrary, it makes you feel cowardly and makes you blame yourself so that you will be more nervous next time. Moreover, we can't escape for a lifetime, we regret that we have to interact with people as we live in this society, and sooner or later, we all have to face it.

1. Compare options. In fact, there is no need to make too many comparisons when facing trivial things, but when faced with the choice of major life events, you may wish to list all the options, score each option according to several factors, and choose the option with the highest score, so that you can not only make a rational choice, but also not be so entangled.

2. Do not pursue perfection. People with difficulty in choosing often have a perfectionist tendency, often finding that no option is perfect, and as a result, they don't want to make any choice. Objectively speaking, there is no such thing as perfection, and instead of striving for perfection in everything, it is better to strive for the best results after making less than perfect choices.

3. Recognize your own heart. Many people can't understand their inner needs, can't know exactly what they want to get by doing something, so they often feel that the choice is difficult, for example, eating dinner is to fill their stomachs, as for which restaurant to go to actually does not matter, as the so-called all roads lead to Rome, as long as you can achieve your goals, as for which path to choose may not be so important.

4. Reduce options. Fundamentally improve the difficulty of choosing by reducing the number of choices, for example, if you are often entangled in which pair of shoes to choose when you go out, you may wish to put out only one pair of shoes and temporarily seal the other shoes; Or make a plan for the problems you are often struggling with, stipulate the specific choices you will make when dealing with a certain problem in a certain period of time, and strictly abide by them, so as to feel the happiness of not having a choice.

5. Don't get entangled after deciding. No matter how confused you are in the process of making a choice, don't dwell on the choices you have already made, after all, if you are not facing those big questions of right and wrong, there is no strict right and wrong. Constantly dwelling yourself on the past will only lead to a difficult life when it comes to making choices in the future.