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Anonymous users2024-02-07A: Life is a lifetime, and it is a hundred years in the blink of an eye.
B: Not really.
A: As the saying goes, "I have five out of ten and am determined to learn, thirty and stand, forty and not confused, fifty and know the destiny of heaven, sixty and obedient, seventy and do what I want." ”
B: That's what Master Confucius said.
A: When you reach a certain age, you will be able to see through the things of the world.
B: That's right. A: Especially when taking a bath, when people take a dip in the hot pool, the perception of life is born spontaneously.
B: yes. A: That day, a professor came to the bathing center, took off his clothes and went to the pool to lie down for a comfortable time, and opened his mouth to say a word.
B: What words?
A: "Ah—Archimedes is nothing more than that! ”
B: Hey, that's a great ancient Greek physicist.
A: That's right, Archimedes discovered the law of buoyancy, which states that the buoyancy that an object acquires in a liquid is equal to the weight of the liquid it expells.
B: Look at what people are bathing in.
A: After a while, another doctor came, went down to the pool and took a dip, and the warm body was called a moisturizer, and he opened his mouth to say.
B: I have something to say.
A: "Hey—the fetus is nothing more than that in the mother's womb. ”
B: Ho, the associative power is rich enough.
A: That is, only those who study medicine can have such a profound understanding.
B: I'm famous.
A: Then another soldier came, quite big, who swam down from one end of the pool to the other end of the pool, sat down and wiped the water from his face, and said a high word.
B: What is the high theory?
A: "Hey—that's what an aircraft carrier is. ”
B: Huh? A: You have to be a soldier, and when you think of it, it's the country's security and national defense construction.
B: Well, China should have aircraft carriers.
A: Finally, there is a cook.
B: A master chef who cooks.
A: Reached out and touched the pool water, it was not hot enough, and then touched the pool next to it, this line, it was very hot, and the skin was hot after lying down in the pool for less than two minutes, and everyone else was dumbfounded.
B: Did you accept it?
A: Not only was it bearable but also very comfortable, and this master lay down in the water and said a word, which was more philosophical than what the other three said.
B: What did he say?
A: "Hey—fried fritters are nothing more than that. ”
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Anonymous users2024-02-06One day, the teacher walked into the class, and the students stood up and shouted, "Good morning, teacher!" ”
The teacher said indignantly, "Just good morning? What about my afternoon? Isn't it bad? ”
Then the students shouted in unison: "Good afternoon, teacher!" ”
The teacher said indignantly, "What about me at night? ”
The students shouted in unison: "Teacher, it's okay at night!" ”
The teacher nodded and said, "That's it, now shout again!" ”
The students shouted in unison: "Good morning, good afternoon, good afternoon, good evening, teacher!" ”
The teacher said, "Sit down!" Today we're going to review antonyms, and we're going to practice like this, and I'm going to say, you say the antonyms out loud. Start now. ”
Teacher: "The weather is fine today. ”
Student: "It's a bad day. ”
Teacher: "It's sunny everywhere. ”
Student: "It's cloudy everywhere. ”
Teacher: "The road is crowded. ”
Student: "The road is empty. ”
Teacher: "Young. ”
Student: "Old. ”
Teacher: "Stand." ”
Student: "Lie down".
Teacher: "There was a young man standing on the road. ”
Student: "There's an old man lying down on the road. ”
Teacher: "I picked up a dollar." ”
Student: "I lost a dollar." ”
Teacher: "I picked up a dollar and gave it to the teacher." ”
Student: "I lost a dollar and went to steal the teacher." ”
Teacher: "Wrong, you can't say that!" ”
Student: "That's right, that's what you should say!" ”
Teacher: "Wrong. ”
Student: "Correct. ”
Teacher: "It's not okay, it's illegal!" ”
Student: "That's okay, it's legal!" ”
Teacher: "I said it wrong. ”
Student: "We're right. ”
Teacher: "Listen to the teacher, what the teacher said is correct!" ”
Student: "Listen to us, what the teacher says is wrong!" ”
Teacher: "You are stupid. ”
Student: "We're smart. ”
Teacher: "Stop! ”
Student: "Go ahead!" ”
Teacher: "Stop now!" Stop it! ”
Student: "Let's move on now!" And more! ”
Teacher: "You stupid pigs, I said stop!" ”
Student: "We're all geniuses, we say go ahead!" ”
Teacher: "Listen to the teacher!" ”
Student: "Teacher listens to us!" ”
Teacher: "Students have to listen to the teacher!" ”
Student: "Teachers have to listen to students!" ”
Teacher: "Now stop practicing!" ”
Student: "Now let's get back to the practice!" ”
Teacher: "Are you all endless?" ”
Student: "We have a beginning and an end!" ”
Teacher: "Then you stop!" ”
Student: "Then let's move on!" ”
..After that, the teacher angrily walked out of the classroom with the book in his arms.
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Anonymous users2024-02-05Guo Donglin's sketch "Guiding the Way", remember? It's the one that turns left and turns left and then the left, I think it's very classic, and it's been a long time, everyone can't remember it clearly, and it works very well again.
And this one can be up to a few more people.
Xiding APP is a platform for live streaming of offline performances, and there will be live broadcasts of offline dramas, ** plays, and stage plays every day. And there will be a selection of wonderful performance clips. You can also chat and make friends with drama friends from all over the world. Don't miss it.
A: Yo, isn't this a little X?
B: Yo, it's little X, what have you been busy with lately? >>>More
1.Three's;
2.The content must be related to gratitude, not copied online, and preferably funny; >>>More
My favorite of the sketch actors is Feng Gong. Whenever the Chinese New Year comes, his dear audience and friends, I miss you to death, I feel very kind and warm after listening to it. In addition, his works are all works that combine the current situation in society and give people reflection, which is relatively profound.
It's a joke that I don't know, but there is Fuwa.