How do you maintain the individuality of your own language in communicating with others?

You're going to read. Many people know in their hearts that other people's opinions are insignificant, but there is still no way to solve their own problems, and they still feel that they are not balancing their interpersonal relationships, and they will always be led by the nose by other people's ideas inadvertently. The simple reason is that you don't believe in this belief in your brain.

So, if you want to get rid of this mentality, another thing to do is to read a book to understand what you should trust and what you should laugh it off. There is no way to balance your mentality in your own life, so give up first, read the things that you have forgotten, those fables and fairy tales, and you will find that the inner world you are facing has been corroded too much, and thinking and wisdom are missing from the heart. Everyone grows up struggling with their own, so it's best to respect the experiences of those who came before you, and it's best to read the classics rather than the latest popular books on interpersonal communication.

You have to understand that those popular books do not mean that they are really worthy of our appreciation, it is precisely because they are popular that you have to judge whether it contains too many commercial elements, in other words, whether its content is trying to attract your attention, such books cannot be wanted, their purpose is to make money, there are not many places that are really useful, so it is better to spend a lot of money into the pockets of booksellers, or to seriously read the classics, the latter because the sales object will not disappear with the change of popularity, Therefore, the bookstore usually maintains its original thinking and does not change it arbitrarily.

Take the initiative to find your circle of friends. When we were very young, our circle of friends was set for us by life. They are Zhang Xiaomao at the same table, the brother of the neighbor next door, and the daughter of my mother's colleague.

But as you grow up, you have to learn to step out of the circle and take the initiative to find your friends. Because at this time, your appeal to your friends is no longer to be able to dance with you, or to identify with each other's values. And the world is so big, and everyone is so different, there are very few possibilities to find people who can identify with your values in this small circle that life sets for you.

Participate in more interest gatherings in the same city (Douban is definitely a good thing), participate in more gatherings between friends, and there will be more people who friends bring friends to get to know each other slowly, and then you can always find people who have the same value orientation as you, and you can always find people who can debate immediately when you have different views. And such a friend, sometimes really one is enough.

Face yourself, know yourself, understand what kind of person you want to become, whether you are cowardly, or have no quarrel with the world, the same behavior will have different evaluations from different people, and it is not easy to do a good job so that others agree with you. Friends like you to be honest, and work may require you to be reserved, recognize yourself, and not be surprised. In today's society, it's harder to be yourself.

If you want others to recognize you, you must first learn to cater to other people's tastes, and he will pay attention to you in his eyes, and then it is time to show your own style.

Don't hide your thoughts, don't pay special attention to other people's opinions and evaluations, and don't dare to show yourself (typical lack of confidence). [Perfection is always good, but it is not always possible. There is only one end to the pursuit of perfection in everything:

The bar is getting lower and lower. Learning to survive imperfectly in this imperfect world is a rare piece of wisdom. Talents with a deep understanding of "imperfection is the norm" may be able to "not feel unnecessarily inferior".

Realize that you don't need to cater to others. You can never make everyone like you or be happy with you. Stop doing it.

If you look externally for self-worth and a sense of existence, you will be tired. Instead, respect yourself, like yourself, appreciate yourself, improve yourself, love yourself – and when you do that, you'll start to find that more and more people will like you, respect you, appreciate you, and love you.

Just be assertive, there is no need to deliberately change your posture, the aura is related to strength, Jinhua Mother-in-law, Extermination Master, every time she appears, she trembles, as if she will fall down as soon as she blows, but there is still a domineering aura, Qiao Feng, Huang Yaoshi, every time he appears, he is domineering and leaking, not to mention his aura. Strength determines aura. Changing posture does not change the aura.

Well, if your eloquence is not good, you will say less and only talk about the main points.

Dealing with the world, no matter who you are to, should be neither humble nor arrogant. Close or reliable people can share opinions with each other, which is a gain for themselves and others; Inconsequential, self-righteous people, laugh and laugh, why bother. The crux is not weakness, if you want to be generous, you must treat it calmly, since you are smiling and laughing, you should also let go of your heart.

In the process of communicating with others, I also want to show my own language personality, which I think is quite amazing! Personality is a thing that it is best to have reservations in the process of interacting with people, unless your social skills reach a certain level. Of course, it also depends on the purpose of your communication with people.

Whether it's to show your personality or to communicate with people.

This shows that you are too susceptible to external influences. It's hard to say that your original words and deeds, behavior and habits are your own and personal, most of them are learned from classmates and netizens. It's kind of boring.

I don't quite understand, instead of talking about how you can maintain the independence of your own thinking without following the crowd, you want to maintain the individuality of the language?

Maintaining one's own individuality is king, just like making a difference in making a product now. I am willing to meet everyone who thinks subjectively and is willing to express themselves, because there is always something new to be gained from being with them.

Say to yourself that you can do it, and you can definitely do it. You must believe in yourself and give yourself confidence, the key is to take the first step, to walk out boldly, with the first experience, you will have the courage to go out for the second time, in this way, you will find that you are very courageous, but you did not play it.

Before you do something, think carefully about how you should do it, exercise your careful thinking, and then work hard to do it, don't have meaningless worries, just have courage and work hard. I believe you are a man of courage.

Also, the more you don't like something, the more you have to force yourself to do it. For example, if you don't like going downstairs, then after dinner, force yourself to go downstairs, greet others, communicate, and try to do it.

In this way, only you can help yourself, and after a while, you will find that you will slowly integrate into the crowded situation, and even if you still don't like it, but not as annoying as you are now.

To learn to explain and communicate, this is also the ability of human survival. Read more and communicate more. When necessary, it is also very helpful to ask for help from a psychiatrist, and I hope you will get better soon. Come on, friend.