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Look at your situation, it's probably the kind of traditional Chinese housewife There are a lot of people around me, including my mother My mother has never thought of going out to work since I was born, she just stayed at home to take care of us, did so much for us to do laundry and cooking, and took care of us, doing housework all day long, it was really very hard, but there was no way, after all, my father had to work hard outside to let us have a material foundation, so that we could live a good life. So that we can have a stable life, so, my mother is just as hard as you are, but there is no way to do it
As for you saying that your husband is not at ease with the children? Why, do you think he doesn't know how to cook? I think cooking is a trivial matter, you can also let him learn well after you, although it can't improve much, but as long as you can cook simple dishes, it's okay?
Or do you think he doesn't know how to do laundry? It's okay, your automatic washing machine is okay, you can teach him well, so that he knows what level and how much water should be used for different clothes, you can learn. If you think he has a big temper and is afraid that he will not be good for his children, then don't worry, strict fathers are filial sons, nothing can make a father really bad for children, mother's love is like water but father's love is like a mountain, you have to learn to let go is also to let your child feel a different education model, let him feel the father's love well, it is all good, okay, my words are here, as for your own decision, I think it, it still depends on yourself, if you are really reluctant to have children, it is okay After all, you have been with the child for so long Of course, it is naturally not okay to listen to my opinion on this matter, I think, you can listen to the child's opinion to see who he wants to take him, and then discuss it with your husband to see if you can weigh it well, and think of a foolproof plan that is naturally the best <>
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<>I think the experience at this time is actually an experience that every mother will have, that is, you may feel that the child is brought so big in your own hands, and then suddenly handed over to others may not be at ease, and then take care of the child yourself, it may still be a little too busy, after all, you need to take care of the child, you also need to clean up the house, maybe there are more housework, you may not be able to take care of it for a while, and your body may be particularly tired, I think that's when you need to relax. Then give the child to the husband at ease, I think in fact, this thing really needs to be exercised, my husband's ability to take care of the child, because after all, the child is two lives, that is, he is also responsible for taking care of the child, right, that is, I think sometimes I still need to relax for myself, that is, maybe my husband also likes to watch the child, because it is his own child, right, so I think sometimes I still need to let go, let my husband take care of the child by himself, You may just be looking around, right, when there is a dangerous move or something happens, you just tell your husband, right, I don't think this is a problem at all, and I think it will also help cultivate the parent-child relationship between your children and your husband.
At this time, it is really to let go of the vigilance that you are a mother, that is, in fact, that person is the child's father, right, he will definitely not do anything to hurt the child, he may just have something unthinkable, and then you can guide him on the side, I think after all, you can't let yourself be too tired, because after all, the body is still your own, right, you have to take care of it, or help some life in the future, I think it's better to rest assured to hand over the child to your husband!
Finally, I hope you can immediately let go of the anxiety in your heart, and then hand over the child to your husband to take care of, and take a good rest!
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Marriage is a marriage of two people, and there are problems between husband and wife in marriage that need to be solved in time, otherwise the accumulation will affect the relationship between husband and wife. If you have a complaint about your husband in your heart, then don't keep it in your heart, but say it, as the saying goes, don't say it clearly, as long as the words are spoken, there will be no estrangement in the hearts of the two people. So when you feel tired from taking care of the children, what can you do so that your husband can understand you and be considerate of you, so as to help you, and then I will talk about some of my own opinions.
First, take a moment to sit down and communicate. The best way for couples to resolve conflicts and eliminate estrangements is to sit down and communicate openly and honestly, because only communication can let the other party understand what you think in your heart and let the other party know the pain in your heart. Sometimes it's not that the husband doesn't help, but that he himself is a person who doesn't know how to be considerate and doesn't know how to express his feelings, and he needs to be reminded by others to be able to react.
Therefore, when we meet such a husband, we need to be more clear.
Secondly, let the husband know that the child is the child of two people, and both husband and wife have the responsibility to take care of it. InMarried life.
Most families will have children, and the birth of a child will bring happiness to the couple, but it will also be accompanied by due diligence. But often in some families, it is a woman's business to take care of the child, and the man only cares about earning money back, but this idea is really very unwise, and either spouse has the responsibility and obligation to the child. Therefore, we must be clear to the party who does not know how to be responsible, and let the other party always know their responsibilities in front of the book.
All in all, in married life, husband and wife must not only know how to understand and be considerate of each other, but also must understand their responsibilities in marriage. If one party has a grudge against the other party, you must say it, let the other party know what you think in your heart, as long as the husband and wife can be honest with each other and can communicate frequently, I believe that the life of the husband and wife will become more and more harmonious.
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When you feel tired, you need to communicate with your husband, and if you have more understanding between the two of you, you can try to hold the baby to your husband.
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You should talk to your husband about your feelings, involve him in family life, and let him take care of the children with you.
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I think you can divorce him, because it's not good for the development of the relationship at all.
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Children are also part of the husband, so directly tell the husband that he should also actively participate in his education, and just say the pros and cons directly.
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Say in a coquettish tone, you are very tired with a baby, and you may be about to get depressed, I hope he can feel sorry for you and give you a little more love and home warmth.
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If you let him take care of the child directly, he will know how hard it is for women, and it is better for girls not to be full-time housewives, and no one understands how hard it is.
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enlighten him intellectually.
The husband has no sense of responsibility, which is a habit he has developed since childhood; is that he has relied on his parents since he was a child, so he has lived alone with you until now, and his mind has not changed; At this time, you must enlighten him intellectually; Tell him what responsibilities and obligations he should bear when he gets married; As long as he knows, he is no longer a child; Then, in his heart, he knew what kind of responsibilities he needed to take on and what kind of things he needed to do for a family.
Arrange everything in the house for him to do.
Arrange for him to do all the things at home; Let him know what he needs to do when he gets married; If you let him do everything and make it a habit, he will have a clear idea of what he should do at home in the future. If you do everything yourself and make him too comfortable, he will naturally not care about anything and ask nothing. Let him do more, and he won't feel like he has nothing to do all day.
Let him make decisions about big and small things.
In a family, there will be some small things, and there will be some big things; Whatever it is, you can't just pick it up and do it; Either way, you have to consult with him and tell him what to do. When he has made up his mind, you can ask him to do what he has to do instead of you. As long as every time, he gets used to it, then he will not ignore everything in the house; So let him be the head of the family, and not himself; There are some things, if you are the master of the country, then he will feel that you can handle everything, and naturally he will not care about you.
Give him more words of praise and encouragement.
Your husband has no sense of responsibility, you have to give him more words of praise and encouragement; Don't always attack him, and don't always look down on him; Tell him more how great he is and how capable he is; Let him find a sense of existence, then he will think more about what to do; Every man wants to be a capable person in front of his wife; If you hit him, it will only make him less and less confident; The more you praise him, he will naturally be more confident and responsible because of your praise.
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You have to communicate and communicate with your husband more, tell your husband your thoughts, let your husband change his habits, and learn to release his mood, relieve his pressure, and let him take on the responsibility of the family.
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You should take the initiative to communicate with your husband and find the tipping point where two people live in peace, you have to put pressure on your husband to make him responsible, and you can also let his parents discipline him.
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I think you don't care too much, you must learn to enjoy, you have to take care of yourself, you must learn to be selfish.
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If your husband is able to have time. Of course, it's best to change my wife's long-term philosophy. If you can't, you can also consider your wife's help for psychological help.
Even a family should seek counseling together. My husband is busy making money, my wife is alone, is using rewards and punishments, and their actions are both righteous and negative. Set a monitoring table for the wife's behavior, and then, a family will develop a punishment with three.
All three of them signed, forming something called a psychological contract.
Although the method seems simple, two words. But it's very valuable. Imagine what was the reason for what his wife did?
If the administration of the child is done by the husband and wife. Then you will inevitably monitor the whole process of monitoring the whole process. Real-time correction of the wife's behavior.
In particular, it will increase time with your child.
The child enters the age of three. For children's social skills, training, children's rules education, children's ideals, more people need to participate. However, many family fathers do not have this meaning and are too young to communicate with their children.
The husband's time in the family, as a result, is the wife's independent implementation of the child's management tasks. In these cases. When the wife is a social pressure, or because of his own emotions, or because the family is good, children often become a role.
We usually praise the relationship between husband, wife and children. Nuclear families are focusing on relationship balance. One of the students will bring imbalance to the relationship.
There is even such a phenomenon. Some wives attract relationships and interactions with their husbands through the death of their children. Perhaps because husbands and wives communicate more or less the same, there is a lack of direct communication channels, so children have become the only ones involving husbands and wives.
In fact, the husband's nuclear family is too small, or the husband and wife do not communicate, the impact of the child is very profound and long-term. In general, we think of a child as having acquired socially adaptable, social-emotional business. Regulatory identification, the formation of self-ideals, including gender personality recognition, and the need to participate in the identity of the husband.
Don't wait until the child is already in adulthood, the character has been **, has a distortion or psychological problem, and then think about changing the child. At that time, the cost and time payment were more expensive. The husband has the family responsibility of supporting the people.
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I think you need to find an opportunity to talk to your husband about this issue, be sure to say what you really want to say in your heart, and don't let him think that you are a bully.
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I think you should communicate with your husband first, and then tell him about your troubles, and at the same time find a way to solve it, so that you can live in peace.
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I should leave for a few days, leave the children with my husband, and let him experience the hardships of being a housewife.
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You said that your husband looks down on you, you are tired of doing housework and taking care of the children every day, and your husband can't feel sorry for you?
In fact, how to say it, you have paid too much for this family, it is because of your contribution to the family that you are so comfortable, so that your husband will wear out your good in this comfortable environment, the reason why he doesn't care about you and feels sorry for you is because he feels that he is working very hard outside day by day, you don't do anything at home for a day, you will cook a meal and take a child and be tired to **, he thinks you are too relaxed day by day, it feels as if he is supporting this family and you, He felt a little uncomfortable in his heart, and began to complain and began to complain about you, this is not good and that is not good.
Once a woman has no financial independence, then her husband will look down on you more and more, so you have to start changing now, first send the child to kindergarten, if you are still young and you are not willing to do it, you will let your family help you, you have to start your own economic independence, so that you can have a status in this family, in order to have the right to speak, if you still want to live in this family, you will not be disliked by your husband. So I want to be financially independent.
I want to go to my husband with my children at home, but my husband's economy does not allow you to visit and stay for a few days, and then go home.
Throw the child to her husband on the weekend, go out with his girlfriend for a day, let him also taste the taste of taking care of the child, which is much harder than him going to work to make money.
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