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I've been through this too! I think the time has been slow for a long time, and you will let go of all the baggage in your heart! After all, you will live in this family for most of your life!
Mother-in-law didn't say anything good, so you shouldn't have any baggage! Maybe you are not used to life there now, after all, it is still a matter of time! Half a year at most, and you'll be very close!
Trust me, because I'm in a similar situation to Ling! (My mother-in-law may not be as good as my mother-in-law!) )
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It is impossible to say that it is impossible to treat your mother-in-law as a mother, after all, your mother will dedicate her life's love to you, and it is unlikely that your mother-in-law will be able to do so. Compare your heart to your heart to see how she treats you.
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1. Don't care.
It is the love of the mother-in-law to help, and it is the duty not to help. If you are willing to help, then you should be grateful. If you don't want to help, you can't hold a grudge. In the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, never have too much hope for the other party. The greater the hope, the greater the disappointment.
2. Relax your mind.
Some mothers-in-law are not naturally good at expressing their emotions, especially the older generation. We can see from the economic side whether your mother-in-law treats you as a family member. It is especially clear when the economy is in trouble.
Many of the current young couples are carrying mortgages. The mother-in-law who treats you as a family member will help you when you buy a house and make a down payment, so that your life after marriage will be better. Even some mothers-in-law will ask you every now and then if the money is enough to spend, and if it is not enough, they will give you some.
Of course, you also have to know that it is your duty to help your mother-in-law, and it is your duty not to help. So which mother-in-law can consider for you, it will be even more great for her.
3. Keep your distance.
If you always have a quarrel with your parents-in-law because of money, then in order to reduce the chance of quarrels, you can propose to move out with your husband, explain the reason to your husband clearly, and your husband will support you if you understand, because you will live with your husband in the future, so there is no need to always have disputes with your parents-in-law over money, so living separately from your parents-in-law can also better avoid conflicts between the two parties.
4. Let her husband persuade her parents-in-law and mother-in-law.
Although his father-in-law and mother-in-law are slamming the door, her husband and her thoughts are generally similar. will not worry about money matters, and her husband is the son of her parents-in-law. Therefore, some things can be quickly dismantled so that the husband can discuss with his parents-in-law in person, and he can also let the husband say some good things about himself in front of his parents-in-law.
You have to be filial to them, and don't always keep a straight face because of money. In this way, both sides will also have an unpleasant quarrel. After listening to her husband's words, her parents-in-law will also change their attitude towards herself.
Only when mutual respect is achieved will the family become harmonious and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will improve.
5. Improve your earning power.
If you want not to wronged yourself under your mother-in-law's "Leifeng Pagoda", you might as well try to improve your ability to make money. Some mothers-in-law think that their sons are at a loss because they are not used to seeing their daughters-in-law not doing things and their sons are busy making money. Since it's a modern society, don't be a daughter-in-law to inherit the old male lead, the female lead's thoughts, and the same husband has her own career, when you have the ability to make money, and spend your own money with peace of mind, can your mother-in-law still be so slamming with you.
6. You should be more generous than your mother-in-law.
Mother-in-law is stingy with you, you can be generous to mother-in-law. Mother-in-law is reluctant to spend money, when she gets old in the future, the rest of the money is not all your husband's, and in the current society, most mothers-in-law do not have many children. You usually buy more things for your mother-in-law, and over time, your mother-in-law will know your heart, and she will think that you are a filial child.
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If you can treat your mother-in-law as your own mother, and your mother-in-law can treat you as your daughter, then it's very easy to get along with my sister told me
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Try not to mix together, don't interfere in other people's lives, and live your own life.
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The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is like this, and I am not angry!
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You don't have to love your mother-in-law. Not only is there no natural love between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but they are also competitive with each other. Asking two women who are not related by blood and have never lived together to fall in love is destined to be disappointed. The mother-in-law relationship cannot be compared with a real mother-daughter relationship.
The emotional connection between mother and daughter is continuous, they can attack each other, and the tolerance of the relationship is also very high, but there is no such emotional connection between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and the tolerance is also not.
Don't be like a mother and daughter with your mother-in-law! Relationships need to be managed. In addition to skill, it is also necessary to have reason. For the sake of the couple's life, it is better not to use the mother-in-law as a substitute for the mother.
Chinese do not know how to manage the tenderness between husband and wife, but they pay more attention to the opposite sex that they have cultivated with their own hands, including mothers to sons and fathers to daughters. Many mothers feel lost when their son gets married, often consciously or unconsciously, wanting to get their son again.
Men have to play a role, keep the energy from mom out of the small family, and protect your partner's life.
A healthy mother-child relationship is the foundation of a healthy mother-in-law relationship. Between mother and son, an important separation should be accomplished, but this separation, neither mother nor son, is not done enough.
It is better for the two generations to have a gap in time and space, and if they can not live together, they will not live together. The two generations have differences in lifestyles and concepts of life, and partners also need intimate space to enjoy a comfortable and comfortable partner life without prying eyes and judgments.
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Be a two-faced person. The right heart is your own conscience.
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Maybe you don't know her yet, or maybe you know it's just your feelings. Respect her and please her appropriately. It seems that you don't live with your mother-in-law, so there shouldn't be much conflict.
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If you are a daughter-in-law, remember:
1. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law do not live together;
2. The daughter-in-law should be financially independent, don't expect to get anything from her mother-in-law, or help you do something, your mother-in-law is not your mother;
Have a meal together during the New Year and holidays, and usually don't come and go.
If you are a mother-in-law, remember:
1. Don't live together; Count the potatoes with it.
2. Don't bury your hands and interfere too much with your daughter-in-law's living habits, dressing and other things;
3. Don't expect your daughter-in-law to be like a daughter, listen to you in everything, think about you in everything, and think about what you have done for your daughter-in-law.
If you're a man, remember.
1. The small family should be independent and not live with either parent;
2. Don't talk to your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and you can't tell each other about your dissatisfaction; You are the key determinant of whether the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are harmonious in this family;
3. I usually buy things for your mother and say that your wife asked you to buy them, and buy food for your wife, saying that your mother asked you to bring them to her.
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It is mainly up to men to maneuver in it.
If the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is very good, there are indeed some small skills, for example, if you speak well, coax your mother-in-law more, praise more, mother-in-law will say more when she sees his advantages, and try not to talk about his shortcomings, after all, she is an elder, review her mistakes more, and say that she wants to learn from her mother-in-law or something.
1. Praise your husband in front of your mother-in-law, don't blame and command your husband too much; 2. When the husband and mother-in-law face each other, they should praise the mother-in-law for how to take care of the house, and do not show contempt and disgust 3. When you go out, you should take the initiative to say goodbye, go into the house to say hello, call your mother more, and don't look at the elderly; 4. Think more about your mother-in-law in terms of food, clothing, housing and transportation, treat your mother the same as your own mother in your interactions, and don't favor one over the other; 5. Be polite to your mother-in-law, don't hurt people with words and make the elderly sad; 6. Be generous and tolerant, and do not talk about housework with people who are easy to contact with your mother-in-law, (especially if you are dissatisfied with your mother-in-law); 7. Take the initiative to apologize in case of conflicts, communicate in a timely manner, eliminate estrangement, and do not have emotions, slackness, and resentment; 8. Be tolerant of your mother-in-law, and ignore your mother-in-law's nagging, but don't accuse and contradict your mother-in-law.
The mother-in-law's psychology is complicated. To put it simply, a mother-in-law is another woman in your husband's life who has to be treated well. My mother-in-law is also uneducated, and uneducated people will feel inferior in front of educated people, so when they see you make a mistake, they will immediately hold on to it, and even if they are wrong, they will not admit it, and the older people are, the stronger their self-esteem. >>>More
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