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Do you care too much about what other people think? I used to be a very restrained person, I couldn't get along with people, and I had baggage. If you want to change this, I think you need to make some changes in your psychology and actions.
You have to understand why you are restrained, whether you have low self-esteem or fear of offending others, etc. Then according to that aspect, prescribe the right medicine, exercise yourself more, and express your needs. You have to know that everyone values themselves and live their own life the most, no one cares about you so much, don't think so much, you just need to be yourself.
Be yourself.
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It's stressful.
I myself have a very simple practice of life and death: every day when I go to bed, I think, "If I fall asleep today, I won't get up again tomorrow." If you think about it this way, you can sleep well, because when you think that tomorrow there will be nothing to disturb me, you will let go of all the sorrows of today, and even all the sorrows of the past, and you will not have any worries about the world, and you will not think that someone owes me 10,000 yuan, and I will take a taxi to ask him for 10,000 yuan, and what will I do when I come back with 10,000 yuan?
I'm going to die tomorrow, so lie down and rest in peace! Tomorrow we may die, and our death is like sleep. Someone thinks:
Tomorrow will die, so it's too negative! "I won't be negative, wake up tomorrow, open my eyes and get up quickly, because I'm not dead yet, and I still have one day to live. If we cherish every day and know that life is impermanent, we will not contradict our parents, put love in one day, we will not quarrel with our relatives, and we will cherish being with our children and colleagues.
If a colleague you hated sat next to you and thought that you might leave the world tomorrow, you wouldn't hate him so much. If you think that you have a long time to be a colleague with him, you will hate it. If you make a visualization of life and death every day, there is nothing to hate, so that you can sleep well every day and wake up the next day full of energy.
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Not for most people.
1.There has to be a certain amount of money.
2.I can carry the weight. Have guts. Realization. Determined. You have to resist people's fear, you have to resist other people's strange eyes, people will kill others, and you have to resist others' maliciously making up stories for you.
If you don't fit in, you're an easy target.
Do something good for the public good, whether out of kindness or crisis PR.
For example, blood donation, bone marrow donation, body donation'.
When there is a major disaster, we go to volunteer.
4.If you don't mix with people who don't have the same outlook on life, values, and worldview, you have to deny your six relatives here. Many friends and classmates have to take the initiative to break off, and you will be constrained if you keep going.
5.His own outlook on life, values, and worldview are formed. It's a long process of precipitation. I have a certain amount of thinking about the direction of my life. Know what you want in this life and what you don't need. With your own interests and hobbies, freedom is meaningful.
Bucket list. Plan your own life.
After going through suffering, without suffering, you may not even have the courage to stop.
6.This is just a way of life to keep oneself and avoid being swallowed up by the crowd, or will it be subject to various constraints, to be completely free from the constraints of human society, and can only live in the deep mountains and old forests or isolated islands.
Catering to the world, catering to the surroundings, and being someone else likes. Or be yourself.
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Buy a no-makeup cream or something, you can buy it to share it with your classmates and discuss it, talk about how you feel about it, in fact, most of the girls are interested in these things, and sharing it with your peers should reduce this special feeling. Mom, the older generation should be poor and afraid, if there is no conditioner, you should not have much problem buying it back. I used to be restrained, but it's much better to have a partner who does the same thing as you, after all, everyone is like that.
Don't worry too much about other people's eyes, will you always pay attention to others all the time? Generally, they forget when they see it, and most people pay more attention to things related to themselves.
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Within the restraints, you will not feel restrained.
But as for your question, I don't think it's better to care about other people's eyes. Everyone's clothes change in a process, and there is always a beginning to try something new. As for the library, people who go to the library don't care about the people next to them, their focus is on the books, and people who don't go to the library are afraid that they don't have the face to laugh at the people who go to the library, because they haven't even done it for a day.
Of course, if you care a lot about what your parents think, you can be submissive to them in some places.
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You should learn to focus on yourself and not on what others think. And when doing things, don't always think about the worst outcome, you can imagine the successful outcome to cheer yourself up.
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The problem lies with yourself, your own perception that cares too much about the eyes of others. In fact, there are few people in this world who really care about you except your parents and closest relatives. Why are you making yourself so serious?
Relax, people live in this world to live their true selves, be brave and be yourself, don't be too nervous.
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1. The general reason why people think that a person is restrained is because he doesn't like to talk and express himself, so he usually needs to do some speaking level exercises. For example, giving a speech in front of a mirror, often attending friends' parties, etc. Remember to let go of yourself and treat others not only with enthusiasm but also with nature.
2. Make a group of unrestrained friends, as the so-called close to Zhu is red and close to ink is black. Make this kind of friend and you will slowly learn a lot of advantages from them. It plays an important role in getting rid of introversion and getting rid of introversion.
3. Have an optimistic and cheerful attitude. The road to changing yourself can be bumpy, but have faith in yourself. Changing yourself is for a better life tomorrow.
Reading more inspirational books and chicken soup for the soul is good for yourself. Usually go out for walks and travel. Don't stay at home all the time, you will generally become lazy after staying at home for a long time, etc., in short, you should learn more about the outside world and breathe more air outside.
I believe that you will become better and better on the road in the future.
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You change it, take the initiative. Ask her what she likes, or what she wants to play. When I went shopping with her, I pretended to hold her hand inadvertently.
Isn't that okay, if you've been so introverted, the girl will think that you don't like her, there are a lot of things that the guy has to take the initiative, and if you don't say anything, her feelings about you will slowly change, and you will blow it. Come on.
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You must make yourself confident, or don't let yourself feel embarrassed, because only in this way can you let yourself be generous and generous, and you can not let yourself be restrained.
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Contact more people, communicate with people more, make friends extensively, treat people sincerely, if you work, you can try to engage in sales and other business work, you must not be afraid of anything, fearless can move forward.
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In the marriage continue to change themselves, make themselves better, but also for the other party to make appropriate changes and compromises, in order to make each other's love more long, not long after marriage to conceive a baby, due to malnutrition, but also because I don't know how to cook, my husband has no time to take care of me, so I can only go to my mother-in-law for a while to go to my mother's house, at that time I feel that I and my husband slowly began to appear estranged, I told him many times, his mother is not my mother, It is impossible to treat me like my mother, but he doesn't listen, he always says that his parents are very good, how is it, but when I arrived at my mother-in-law's house, my mother-in-law played mahjong every day, and the cooking was not on time, and my father-in-law smoked at home every day, and it was useless to say, and at this time he always said that I was not sensible and so on, and slowly found that I was unwilling to call him ** to say these things.
Second, later I went back to my parents' house, and my mother took care of me, she had a lot of things to do, but she was also taking care of me wholeheartedly, because I was too pregnant and vomited, my appetite was really not good, and I was very picky, so I could feel the distress of my parents, and then after giving birth, my in-laws did not say to help take care of the confinement, nor did they say to help take care of the child, in short, my confinement was taken care of by my mother, and he felt that his mother's waist was not good, and I had to understand if he couldn't come.
Third, then we couldn't take the baby alone, and it was true that a person would not take care of it, so I took the baby back to my parents' house, and his parents didn't hit one, at first I and he would be a day **, and then slowly I didn't want to pick him up, and I didn't want to talk to him too much, we separated for about ten months After I went back, I felt that the two of them could not be like the feeling when they were in love, at that time we had just been married for three years, and the feeling at that time was that I wanted to return to a person's life.
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It shows that you lack self-confidence, and you should actively integrate into the outside world and exercise yourself in public.
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Talk to others, communicate more, and actively participate in group activities, and gradually you will become cheerful and confident.
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In addition to being related to your personality, I feel that it is also related to your age, the more things you have experienced, the more knowledge you have learned, and how to deal with people, you will naturally understand.
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This must be changed, it will affect my own development very much, and I will not be confident enough in the long run, because I am also like this, and I am currently forced to change, it is no longer the same as before, speak a little harder, and don't have a good temper!
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It may be because you have too few people or things to come into contact with, and once you are afraid of certain occasions, you are introverted. So try to reach out to people, try to do something, um, give yourself a chance to exercise. It's going to get better slowly.
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This is a moment that cannot be changed, do your job well, work more and talk less, the leader will pay attention to you, and you have the ability to worry about not being able to find food.
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From a psychological point of view, your sense of security is not strong, and letting go of these two words is easy to say, but it is not easy to do, so the first thing you need to do is to give yourself and others a sense of trust. Secondly, get in touch with the external environment, learn and adapt, and let yourself be in a relaxed state. Finally, accept yourself and accept others, the emotions are mutual.
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Restraint, which is the inevitable consequence of the lack of exercise since childhood, when I was young, I was all around the adults, and the adults did not guide the children how to learn how to treat others, so when the children grew up, this ability will not work. Therefore, parents are the first teachers of any ability of children, and the responsibility of parents is not done well.
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In fact, it's all the same, maybe others are more restrained than you, but they cover it up well and don't see it.
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You can't let go of yourself, in fact, you love face but your heart is not confident enough, afraid that you will do something wrong and people look down on a kind of behavior.
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This shows that you are not confident in yourself. Maybe you are not deeply involved in the world, and you are not capable enough to face it in your future life, so at present, you can only make yourself stronger, more capable, learn more, experience more, from ignorance to knowledge, and then to be stronger, and slowly you will let go of the constraints.
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That is a lack of confidence in oneself, and to be confident in things can help to improve1, and then there will be no restraints, and let go of oneself.
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Participate in social activities to exercise your social skills. Over time, things will change.
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Participate in more social activities, no matter where there are righteous activities, and if there are conditions, you can participate in them, and after a long time, you will let them go.
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This is determined by character, a person should be frank and open-minded, do things in a down-to-earth manner, everyone is equal, and there is no distinction between high and low professions, there is no need to let go of yourself.
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Don't be discouraged by others, because you may also be disliked by others, and conversely, don't be discouraged by being discouraged by others, because you may not be treated at any time.
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It's good to be well-informed, the reason why we are restrained is because we don't see much is not wide, just ask you and your family, and good friends, and people you know very well.
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Restrained people are often introverted, and they seem to be restrained when communicating with others, so they must learn to communicate with others more, express their personal opinions, and build self-confidence.
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Then you will exercise yourself more. Participate in more group activities, go out more to see the world, and slowly become less restrained.
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This is related to a person's personality, more introverted people are very restrained, they will be nervous on many occasions, they can't let go of themselves, and sometimes they are easy to make mistakes, and their personality is not very good, so change it slowly!
Be firm in your own heart, force your goals and ideas, and what you should do, so that you will not be infected by the surrounding environment. In this way, you can better accomplish what you should accomplish.
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