Does my mother in law have a problem, or do I have a problem?

Updated on psychology 2024-04-27
28 answers
  1. Anonymous users2024-02-08

    I want to do everything, but you really shouldn't stay in his brother and sister-in-law's room.

    As for the wallpaper, decoration and the like, you have to think that the people of your mother-in-law's era have different ideas from today's young people, and you also say that your husband's conditions are not as good as your family, so some ideas and practices may be different, young people think it is romantic, good-looking, beautiful, and they feel that it is not worth it or something like that. Your husband's two sons, his parents are not easy to bring up the two sons, it is not good to say, that is, it may be more critical in all aspects, you have to think about it, if they are not like this, it is difficult to bring the children so big. For this wallpaper, in the eyes of the mother-in-law, she may feel that she can live with or without wallpaper, and it costs money to buy wallpaper, and she can't fill her stomach, so she may feel unnecessary.

    Every girl's parents want their daughters to marry off beautifully, which is human nature. When you get to your husband's house, there are times when it should be yours, and you have to fight for it, but sometimes you may have to be wronged, so you have to bear it yourself. Sometimes you can be coquettish with your husband, or complain a little, and usually don't show any emotions on your face, especially in front of your in-laws.

    You have just gotten married, and the days to come are still long, so try to empathize with each other when you encounter problems.

    I don't want to say that you or your mother-in-law are bad, but I just think that there are some things that can be communicated by both parties, and the family ......

    If you are usually unhappy, you can find someone to talk to, don't hold it in your heart.

    I hope you are happy!

  2. Anonymous users2024-02-07

    One. The property rights are not clear, and you have not done justice to know that those rooms belong to you.

    Two, they don't think things from your point of view, so you'd better communicate your thoughts to them.

    Three, if it is only through your husband, then I estimate that he will give in a lot, because he has been like this since he was a child.

    Fourth, if you don't want to get entangled with them, just say that you have no money, ask them to come up with the money for the down payment, otherwise, take the room out to determine your rights, otherwise even the room is not yours, of course you can't do the so-called decoration, even if it is wallpaper, because this directly declares that the room belongs to you, and the small farmer of this family may be more serious, only for himself.

  3. Anonymous users2024-02-06

    Between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law and family members, no one is right or wrong, and it is impossible to tell. Only communicate more, and both sides are open to communication. I think you all have a point, but now that you are married, I support you to make the marriage room simple, and you can't be wronged.

    And it's really not much. If you want to get it, you also make it your home and your own nest. So I'm on top of you.

    I suggest you talk to your husband about it. You can also show him this post, and refer to what we outsiders see when we are clear-headed. Of course, it's best to watch it at a time when you're at peace.

    If he were considerate of you, he wouldn't say anything.

  4. Anonymous users2024-02-05

    I think it's your mother-in-law's problem, it's right to arrange the marriage room, she has no reason to object, sometimes you can also show your tough attitude, she rejects you as an outsider, and the relationship after marriage will not be very good.

  5. Anonymous users2024-02-04

    In this way, your mother-in-law didn't plan for you, so you don't have to worry so much, in fact, it's okay, it's not in front of you, so that she won't say this and that in the future, you know? Are you going to live with her permanently? If I don't pretend, I don't get it, it's good to go back and see her during the New Year's holiday, stay away, the outbreak won't do you any good.

  6. Anonymous users2024-02-03

    I don't have experience as a mother-in-law or daughter-in-law, but I think you're already doing a good job, don't go against the elderly, and let your husband go over to do the work! If it were me, I would directly choose to book a house in an outside hotel and decorate it on my wedding day!

  7. Anonymous users2024-02-02

    You don't think you get along well with your mother-in-law, whose problem is this? The discord between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law seems to be something that every family acquiesces in. Some people say that the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is not clear, the daughter-in-law who has just come in does not understand, and the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is tense.

    Some people say that daughters-in-law ask too much and are not sensible, which makes them unhappy, but whose problem is this, it is normal for two people who are not related by blood and have no emotional foundation to have conflicts. So people are starting to realize that it's a problem with the person who is together. He can't adjust.

    He can't handle it. On the surface, it seems like this, but in fact, the relationship between the man and the mother and daughter-in-law went wrong in the first place, and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law were just the appearance.

    The man and the mother did not break up completely. Why is it said that the relationship between a man and his mother is problematic, when the boy is a child, he needs the protection of his mother. As he grows up, he will gradually break up.

    But perhaps the mother's power and control prevent the children from having their own ideas. They can only hide under their mother's wings all the time, pretend to be weak, and lash out at Nono. A man is grown up in age and body, but psychologically a child.

    Marriage is just the product of his adults urging him. His so-called family is just one more person in his original family. He is still a child, and his mother can still take care of all his work, including marriage management and the relationship with his wife.

    In such a marriage, how can a daughter-in-law and mother-in-law be happy when they live together? Men and wives usually have feelings. The man treats his wife well, loves her, and taking into account her feelings, she cannot spend a long time with her mother, take care of family matters alone, or solve them with her mother-in-law.

    Instead, he helped his wife solve her problem. If a man can take on family responsibilities, take care of the children with his wife, and share the housework, how much role will the mother-in-law have, and how can the mother-in-law have conflicts with her daughter-in-law when she does not need to intervene in this kind of matter.

    When the mother-in-law found out that her son loved her daughter-in-law, she experienced a lot of complaints. Because she is more afraid of losing her son than being picky about her daughter-in-law, most of her mother-in-law has rights. In addition, because a man's feelings for his wife are average.

    So, if you think that the relationship between the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law in the family is poor, why not look at the relationship between husband and wife or the relationship between man and mother. There are some things you can change, but there are some things you can't. Point the finger at your mother-in-law, do what you have to do, and don't have to improve yourself.

    The rest is up to you. If it really can't be reconciled, maybe the relationship between husband and wife will be automatically dissolved.

  8. Anonymous users2024-02-01

    If you don't get along well with your mother-in-law, both of you are responsible, and you can't help enough to push the responsibility to only one party and get along with your mother-in-law, it's not good, the main reason is because everyone's three views don't agree, each family has its own unique culture, when you can't integrate into the family, there will be all kinds of collisions.

  9. Anonymous users2024-01-31

    I don't get along well with my mother-in-law, and both parties have problems. If the mother-in-law does not interfere too much in the life of the young couple, then the daughter-in-law will not quarrel with her son every day. The point of contradiction between the two sides lies in the attitude of the son.

    Sometimes the mother-in-law does not put herself in the right position, and she should take care of her husband instead of taking care of her son.

  10. Anonymous users2024-01-30

    I don't get along well with my mother-in-law, and I personally think that there are three people for a reason, and this third person is your husband!

    If your husband treats you very well, you will look at your husband's face and make appropriate concessions to your mother-in-law, if your husband treats you badly and your mother-in-law bullies you, then the relationship between your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will definitely not be good.

    As for the bad relationship between your mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it may be your own reasons, you don't like the elderly, you don't like to be interfered with, you like to be alone, and it is likely that it is also a problem with your own personality.

    Of course, it may also be the mother-in-law's problem, the mother-in-law is too strong, likes to point fingers, likes to interfere in your life, so it will definitely not get along well.

    However, as a bridge of communication between you and your mother-in-law, your husband should go around and try to make the two of you get along well, so whether the relationship between this mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is good or not, the most important thing is to see your husband's ability and attitude!

  11. Anonymous users2024-01-29

    I don't get along well with my mother-in-law, it's not a person's problem, we should analyze the relationship between Ernan objectively, both sides are problematic, as long as they give up a step, they will get along well.

  12. Anonymous users2024-01-28

    I don't get along well with my mother-in-law. A lot of daughters-in-law are bad in real life. Because the task of taking care of the children was given to the mother-in-law, it is understandable that the mother-in-law has complaints.

  13. Anonymous users2024-01-27

    As the saying goes, a slap in the face doesn't make a sound, and the relationship between people is mutual, so when you treat others sincerely, others will treat you the same and treat you sincerely.

  14. Anonymous users2024-01-26

    The problem of getting along with my mother-in-law may not be a person's possibility, everyone has a problem, that is, we have to communicate with each other, and the husband has to do a good job of mediation in it. It's good if everyone gets along well.

  15. Anonymous users2024-01-25

    This should be the husband's problem. Because the husband did not do a good job of regulation, he did not assume his own responsibilities, so the mother-in-law and his wife did not get along very well.

  16. Anonymous users2024-01-24

    There are reasons for both, the biggest reason is that the two generations have different ideological concepts, because of the education they receive, the environment in which they grew up, the different family situations in which they were born, and the different ways of dealing with things and their views on things.

  17. Anonymous users2024-01-23

    When it comes to getting along, it must be a matter of two people, but one party must be more at fault and the other party is less at fault.

  18. Anonymous users2024-01-22

    In fact, it should be a problem for both parties to get along with two people, and it is not fair to attribute the responsibility to one of them alone.

  19. Anonymous users2024-01-21

    It can only be said that there are problems between both parties, and they do not consider the problem from the perspective of the other party, and they do not regard the other party as their own family, so there will be many contradictions.

  20. Anonymous users2024-01-20

    You don't think you get along well with your mother-in-law, whose problem is this? This can't be said to be anyone's problem, if it is said that they don't get along well, it can also be said that it may be direct or a little wrong, but some young people don't understand, and the mother-in-law is all for their good, but he still doesn't understand. But some mothers-in-law are too rude, and it is possible that their daughter-in-law does not treat them as their own family, so if they don't get along well or not, it is best to separate.

  21. Anonymous users2024-01-19

    I don't think if you don't get along well with your mother-in-law, both sides have problems, and they both look at the problem from their own standpoint, don't they? When there is a conflict, you must feel that the other party is not good, in fact, you are also responsible, but people just can't see their own shortcomings.

  22. Anonymous users2024-01-18

    You don't think you get along well with your mother-in-law, whose problem is this? As long as the daughter-in-law respects her mother-in-law and does not worry about some small things, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law will get along very well.

  23. Anonymous users2024-01-17

    Both people have problems, different concepts, different lifestyles, and unless both of them make concessions, otherwise they will not get along.

  24. Anonymous users2024-01-16

    There may be problems, whether it is myself or my mother-in-law or my husband, there may be some problems, alas.

  25. Anonymous users2024-01-15

    Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law don't get along well, who is to blame? I think it's all 50 boards each, but in general, the responsibility should still lie with the mother-in-law.

  26. Anonymous users2024-01-14

    Do you think your mother-in-law doesn't get along well, whose problem is this, I think I have a problem with myself, I'm afraid there is also a problem, both of them have a big serious problem.

  27. Anonymous users2024-01-13

    When encountering the above problems, communication is an important step to solve the problem. Here are some suggestions to help you communicate effectively:

    1.Choose the right time and place: Find a quiet and private environment to have a conversation, make sure there are no other distractions, and make everyone feel comfortable and relaxed.

    2.Listen fully and respect each other's views: In the process of communication, give your daughter-in-law and grandmother enough space to listen and respect each other's opinions and feelings. Express understanding and concern for the other person's position and avoid accusations or criticism.

    3.to"Me"Expressing feelings from the point of view: with"Me"ways to express your emotions and concerns, such as:"I was worried because I felt like there was some contradiction between us. "

    4.Articulate your needs and hopes: Clearly express your expectations and hopes for the relationship, such as:"I hope that we can take care of the children together and build a harmonious family atmosphere. "

    5.Propose solutions: Methods and strategies for solving problems with the other party. Encourage daughters-in-law and grandmothers to participate in the problem-solving process together to promote mutual understanding and cooperation.

    6.Seek media or professional support: If both parties are unable to resolve their disagreements on their own, you may want to consider seeking help from a neutral media starter or professional, such as a family counselor or psychologist. They can provide neutral opinions and suggestions to help improve family relationships.

    7.Insist on positive communication: Be patient and understanding in non-judgmental communication, and continue to pay attention to the feelings and needs of family members. Gradually establishing an atmosphere of openness, respect, and inclusiveness can help alleviate problems and change relationships.

    Always remember to stay calm and rational during communication, and try to avoid emotional or aggressive language. Through rational dialogue and mutual respect, differences can be better resolved and family relationships improved.

  28. Anonymous users2024-01-12

    The problem of a bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law seems to be a difficult problem for the ages, but it is not absolute. Because we can still see that there are many families where mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law get along better than mothers and daughters. If you want to delve into the reasons for the bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it seems that there are the following points.

    One. Co-located in the same place.

    China has always had the custom of four generations or even five generations living together, and is proud of it, who knows, easy to get along, difficult to live with, it is precisely because of living under the same roof, contradictions will also increase, itself before ten or twenty years, or even thirty years, is not in the same family coexistence, each has its own living habits and preferences, suddenly living together, maybe you like to eat spicy, she likes to eat sweet, you want to eat light, but she has a heavy taste, these seemingly inconspicuous problems, really live together, daily conflict, It may turn into a cumulative complaint, and eventually irreconcilably evolve into a bad relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

    IIGnaw the old.

    There are too many modern people who have become giant babies who can't quit milk, and they usually need their parents' support for everything, and then, when something happens, they have to come forward with their parents. But when it comes time to return to their own small family life, they want their parents to let go completely, is it possible? Parents are usually used to asking them to interfere in everything, and if you want them to ignore anything, there is a high probability that they will not be able to stop by inertia.

    And as the saying goes, eat people with a soft mouth and take people with short hands, you enjoy the benefits brought to you by your mother-in-law, and you don't want people to say a second word, the cheap is taken advantage of by you, is this possible?

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