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First of all, parents are not professional parent-child education experts, even if they are professional psychological counselors, or, parent-child education teachers in the face of their own relatives and children, sometimes will lose their neutral position, there will be a feeling, hatred is not steel, because parents often regard their children as their most important people, so they will use their height to ask their children, at this time children are difficult to understand and feel hurt in many cases, so this kind of love becomes a conflict, You will feel that you don't consider the feelings of your children, and there is a big generation gap between your children and your elders, and naturally there will be a lot of conflicts and different standards.
In the end, it doesn't matter if your parents take your feelings into account or not, one thing is for sure, it's all out of love.
Because tiger poison does not eat children, not to mention their parents, whether the parents are bad or good in the eyes of their children, the starting point and motivation in their bones are love, care, or the anxiety caused by love and care The speech and behavior patterns caused by the anxiety invisibly hurt you.
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In reality, most parents are unmotivated, and they don't like to read and study, this is the real reality. Because of the narrowness of knowledge, their cognition is limited, and when educating and getting along with children, they will self-righteously consider problems and solve problems, and of course, they will not take into account children's feelings.
From a child's point of view, this is everyone's idea, it is unreasonable, it is regardless of their own feelings, and even parents are bullying themselves! Although most of the time the parents' intentions are good, the results are very bad. Even the stubbornness of these parents can cause harm to their children.
When you know that parents will also have a lot of deficiencies and defects, then you need to adjust your mentality, that is, work hard to learn your homework, complete your studies, and continue to accumulate and improve your various knowledge. At least let yourself live happily, so that your future children will not be wronged.
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That's a very good question, and we all understand your feelings, and if your parents never consider your feelings, it means that you have a certain communication barrier. This kind of obstacle is not produced in a moment, but is produced by long-term estrangement, which profoundly reflects the absolute authority and power of parents. Then we should actively remove this obstacle.
You can talk calmly with your parents, or talk to each other about your inner feelings when you go out to play, so that you can communicate with each other on the premise of respecting each other. Alternatively, you can confide your inner thoughts to parents in letters or WeChat text messages, don't be afraid of failure, don't be afraid of embarrassment, when you understand each other's real thoughts, parents will also support and help you. I wish you all the best of luck, every day, every life!
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Because you don't say your way of interacting and give your parents your posture, then your parents will be arrogant, thinking that you are receiving the education of love, and you don't know that it has violated your freedom, so you will hate your parents' peer world, feel that you are not respected in life, or learn to walk side by side in both civil and military styles, in order to break out of the cocoon.
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My parents are the same, I think Chinese parents are easy to be self-righteous, self-righteous for your own good or something, even if they do something wrong, they will be if it weren't for you, how could they be like this or something, it seems to be our fault, I sometimes think that parents in the future life should have exams. I wish to give birth to the harm caused by the family, and we must use our lives to ** ourselves.
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It is possible that your parents are too subjective and do not consider their children's feelings, and it is possible that they have arranged your future.
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It may be because his parents have never considered his feelings, so you have to learn to communicate with your parents, from his point of view, calmly say your concerns, communication is the lowest cost but the best way to solve the problem, their starting point must be to be for your good, you just need to give your most real thoughts feedback. Try to make them understand that love must not be a burden.
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You feel that your parents never think about your feelings, because your parents and both of them think that you are too young, and they both feel that they need to help you arrange everything, so they don't think about your feelings.
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As a parent, sometimes it is also painful, many times I want to express my emotions, but because I can't communicate, I do not understand my child very well, it is recommended that I can communicate with my parents well.
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This shows that you are lacking in communication, and you have to communicate with your parents at any time what you are thinking about it, and tell them what you think. Why? In this way, parents will also communicate their own ideas to you, and you can gradually continue to understand.
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It must be because your parents never put themselves in your shoes or even felt deeply about you.
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I think maybe it's because there's a problem with the way you communicate with each other, maybe it's because you think they don't understand you, it's because they're forcing you to learn and make you grow.
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Touch: Everyone seems to be like this. I feel that parents don't understand our hearts, but in fact, as time passes, we will become more and more aware of the value of family affection. Come on oh bao While insisting on yourself, we must also be considerate of the heart of our parents who are good for us.
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Because he is your elder, you have no right to speak, and you will know when you grow up and have children!
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In fact, every parent loves their children, but their own way of dealing with it is not very acceptable.
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Try to communicate with them and talk to them about your thoughts.
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I don't think it's right for your parents to do this, he should treat you as an adult, and parents should respect their children.
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If parents never consider their children's feelings, then parents must change their education methods at this time, and we can also talk to parents in time. We must communicate and communicate more with our parents in our daily lives, and we should also tell our parents what we think.
We all hope that parents can listen to our opinions, and we all hope that their parents can respect themselves, if your parents do not listen to your ideas, and never care about your feelings, at this time you can communicate more with your parents, you can tell your parents your thoughts, and we do not always need to always put such ideas in our hearts, because parents have a greater impact on children, so we must pay attention to related issues at this time, In this way, you will be able to make your child better. We can communicate more with our parents in our daily lives, and we can also tell our parents what we think in our hearts. If your parents don't listen to you, you can talk to your parents at this time.
We don't need to feel particularly nervous, because many parents may not listen to their children when educating them, because they feel that children have no concept at this time, and parents usually behave more strongly in life, so parents will not listen to children at this time. We all hope that our relationship with our parents will become better, and we also hope that our parents can provide us with some help in our later life.
We can take the initiative to communicate with our parents in our daily lives, and we must not let the parent-child relationship become so estranged. The parent-child relationship is very helpful to the whole family, so we must strengthen communication in our daily lives, so that the parent-child relationship can become better.
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Children should communicate well with their parents, tell their parents their ideas, let parents replace themselves, and let parents read more books about education, so that they can slowly consider their children's feelings.
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Children should communicate more with their parents, and then children also need to tell their parents, so that parents can properly consider their children's feelings, and tell parents not to be mavericks, which will not be good for their children's future.
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Children should communicate more with their parents in life, and should also tell parents that they can think about some problems from their own standpoint, so that the two people will become more harmonious, and the parent-child relationship will become better and better.
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You should talk to your parents about it, because it will put a lot of pressure on your child, and at the same time, your child's heart will be distorted and he will not have his own freedom.
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Most parents don't consider their children's feelings, because no matter what the relationship is, we all look at the problem from our own point of view, and it is difficult to understand the feelings of others, so parents only think about the problem from their point of view, and rarely consider the feelings of their children.
You can tell them as much as you think about yourself.
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Some parents don't think about their children's feelings for the following reasons:
Cultural and social factors: In some cultures, parents are seen as decision-makers and mentors to their children, and children are expected to be obedient to their parents' wishes. This thought pattern can cause parents to ignore their children's feelings.
Lack of communication skills: Some parents may not know how to communicate effectively with their children and express their ideas. They may resort to coercive ways to fulfill their own wishes rather than listening to their children.
Selfishness: Some parents may be more concerned about their own needs and interests than their children's feelings. They may think that their decision is the right one and ignore the emotional needs of their child.
Whatever the reason, not taking into account your child's feelings can have a negative impact on your child's mental health, and it can have an impact on their trust and respect. Therefore, parents should consider their children's feelings as much as possible and engage in arguments with them before making a decision.
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Friends and parents often quarrel at home, and every day they either drop things or point at each other's noses and scold.
In the past, she would pretend to be sensible to please her parents, but what she got was criticism full of complaints:
I don't divorce your dad, it's not for you, can you save me worry every day, just supporting you is enough to upset me......”
These parents probably never realize that the birth of a child will not bring a consolidated effect to this already fragmented family relationship.
Instead, it has become a card in their hands, and every time "for you" puts a shackle on the child.
Over time, the child's personality will become more and more sensitive, and he will always put himself in a sense of guilt.
When I was helping in a counseling facility, I met a young boy whose parents were married because they were married, and there was no affection between them.
After running in for a while, they found that they still couldn't get together, so they wanted to end the marriage, but at this time, the little boy's mother found out that she was pregnant.
For the sake of the child, the two chose to continue to live together, but there is no common word between the two people at all, and every day except silence is a quarrel.
This lasted for almost six years, and then the boy's father had someone outside, and every time he came home, he would beat his wife and the boy.
According to the little boy himself, he was beaten by his father for the first time when he was just over four years old, and has been beaten regularly since then. Although his mother would protect the little boy, every time there was only mother and son left in the house, his mother would push him away and complain
If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have lived this life. If it weren't for you, I would have divorced him a long time ago. ”
This is the kind of thing that the mother would often say to the little boy. Therefore, as a result, the little boy often blames himself for his psychological problems, and even when it is serious, he will punish himself in a way.
You see, a child who is not yet 6 years old begins to doubt life, and he even thinks that it is his own existence that makes his mother so sad.
But is the problem really in this child? Not. Because of his parents' marriage, they were destined not to be happy from the beginning, they just got married for the sake of getting married, and after running in for a while, they couldn't get through the same hall and trip.
At that time, even if I found out that I was pregnant, there was no need to forcibly tie up and live with someone who was not compatible with me, because that kind of life could be seen at a glance, and there was no happiness at all.
Who said that if you give your children enough warmth and enough love, you must make your marriage survive? If you are strong enough, you can also give your child enough warmth and love.
Parents often criticize and fight their children, so that teenagers do not enjoy the love of their fathers, their mothers, and the warmth of family, and some only have fear, worry, and disappointment. Children who grow up in such families are often introverted, withdrawn and inferior, and they are afraid to tell their parents the truth for fear of being beaten and scolded for it.
Try to think about others as much as possible, and you have a future.
This is a personal choice, but I personally think that it is better to go to graduate school, and you can have better resources in the future.
People have different personalities, and the way they deal with people is also different! You think about others when you say and do, and that's good! It's good to do what you should do! >>>More
The key is to exercise, exercise more, sit down immediately after eating, often play hula hoops, skip rope, and ice skate.
Maybe it's just your delusion, I used to talk very little in the class, always alone, at that time I felt that my classmates didn't like me, and then through a friend opened a breakthrough, and the relationship with my classmates also improved. Later, a classmate told me that I didn't speak before and had a serious face, and everyone was a little afraid that I wouldn't dare to talk to me, so are you usually a little cold? Maybe people just don't know you, you can try to get closer to them first.