Why don t spoiled children be grateful?

Dote children who take it for granted that others are good to them, and they definitely don't know how to be grateful.

I once saw a story about a rural widow with a child, and the two of them were left in the family, and this child was her last hope. Usually very doting on the child, refusing to let him do any farm work, as long as he studies hard, I hope that he can have a future and get out of this guard.

Every year in the cold and summer, the whole village, regardless of adults and children, go to work in the farmland, and he is alone at home to read and read, and the farm work at home is all done by his mother, and the person in his forties is like the child's grandmother.

Later, this kid lived up to expectations, and was indeed admitted to a university in the city, and later became an official! But she never went back to visit her mother, thinking that her mother was from the countryside and couldn't get on the stage, for fear of losing face! I didn't even invite my mother to get married, I'm afraid that the city daughter-in-law will have an opinion when she sees it!

After two or three years, his mother missed her son, and after asking around, she wanted to see him, but she didn't even enter the door, but was given some money to send her.

In the end, the mother could only return to the countryside ...... tears

I think this story is worth pondering, why don't doted children know how to be grateful? Personally, I think it's because they haven't tasted a lot of suffering, and the suffering they want to taste has been borne for them, and they feel that there is nothing in this world! It's also very simple for parents to raise them!

It is also a matter of course, and it is not worth mentioning at all.

The point of being ungrateful is that they have not suffered and do not know how bitter it is.

So, don't spoil your kids too much! Doting is not love, it is harm! Harm others and yourself!

Parents are very concerned about their children because they also want their children to become better people. However, I think parents must use appropriate backup key methods to educate their children, because children are also prone to some emotional fluctuations at this time, so parents must let their children have a good behavior habit and cultivate children's good qualities. If children don't know how to be grateful, does it have anything to do with their parents' doting?

Everyone also knows that parents can't spoil their children too much, but there are some parents who won't let their children do anything in life, because they are afraid that their children will be hurt. But if parents don't let their children do anything, then you may find that the child may become very selfish at this time, and the child may take it for granted, so parents must grasp the degree and don't care too much about their children.

I think that if your child doesn't know how to be grateful at all, then it's really a very pitiful thing, because the relationship between parents and children is very close, and if your child doesn't care about you at all, it means that your education is really a failure. Therefore, parents should not pamper their children too much in life, otherwise it will lead to children who will not do anything, and when children encounter difficulties in the future, they may choose to escape directly, so it will definitely not be of much benefit to the growth of children.

Therefore, parents should adopt appropriate methods to educate their children, and parents do not need to be too nervous at this time. Because parents want their children to become talents, parents must also let go of their hands appropriately. If the parents do not let the child do anything, the child may also feel overwhelmed at this time, because the child will not be able to do anything, so the child will not be able to solve the problem independently.

Relatedly, if parents have been tolerating their children, it will make them very arrogant, and children will not be considerate of some things from their parents.

It is related to the doting of parents, parents are very fond of their children, no matter what they do, parents feel very good, and the child will be unscrupulous after a long time of cracking, and know how to be grateful.

It is related to the doting of parents, so parents must adjust their own education methods, not to fall in love, and children must cultivate children's gratitude ability.

I think this sentence is very reasonable, indeed in real life, the more parents pay to the child, the less the child knows how to be grateful, this is because the child thinks that the parents should pay for him, and the parents are eager to think about everything for their sake from childhood to adulthood, so once there is one thing that makes them dissatisfied, they will have a great opinion about their parents.

So I think there is a good saying, that is, the children of the poor are in charge of the house early. We can also notice that in our real life, there are many children whose family conditions are not good, but they are particularly sensible and have a special sense of concern for their parents. The main reason is that they have watched their parents raise them since they were young, which is not easy, and they understand the hard work and dedication of their parents, so they will consciously help their parents do housework since they were young.

On the contrary, those children who have been pampered, loved, and grown up by their parents since childhood, have no self-reliance at all, and even grow up to be in their 20s, they have never washed clothes, nor have they helped the family brush the dishes, sweep the floor, and if there is anything delicious at home, she thinks that it should be eaten by her, and it doesn't matter if her parents eat it or not.

So children who grow up in pampering are very selfish. I have seen a report, a retired teacher in Tianjin, has an only child, the couple has endless love for their child and do their best to send him to study abroad, the parents save money, and fully support their son to complete his studies, and then the couple also went to live with their son in a foreign country, he sold his house, and after going abroad, he and his son and daughter-in-law could not live together at all, and wanted to go home and they had no house, and fell out with their son for this matter. It's like an enemy.

Therefore, children should be correctly guided and educated from an early age, don't blindly pamper them, don't meet their wishes in everything, let them know how hard their parents raise them, and let them have a grateful heart. If you don't educate them from an early age, it won't be easy to change them when their worldview has been formed.

Children are not grateful because they do not feel "grace"; They can't remember the heart-warming things because what we do is not what they really need, and it doesn't "warm" them.

Pity the hearts of parents all over the world. Parents give the best of everything to their children. Let the child eat what he is reluctant to eat, and dress the child himself.

If you are reluctant to buy it, buy a high-quality school district house, and attend an expensive training class, do children really feel the love of their parents?

I have a relative who is an example. As parents, they are qualified. They did their best to give the children good conditions, such as school district housing, Qingkuan cram school, and traveling with children. But the baby just doesn't like to learn.

When parents ask their children why they don't work hard, they say that you give me everyone else, do you think this is love? That's the shackles.

Look! Children ignore the love from their parents and feel that they are being shackled and not free. Perhaps in his opinion, these are all given by his parents, and there is nothing special. So, just ignore it.

How to teach children to be grateful:1Don't love too much, give the child what he needs.

We all believe that we love children enough, but what about children? They don't feel it. Because what we give is not what He wants. Sometimes the self-righteous love of their parents makes them stressful.

2.Parents ask for something in return at the right time.

Only giving without asking for anything in return is unequal. This kind of asymmetry can only be done by a great mother. But it's not a good thing.

Just like our stomach, it only absorbs but does not digest, and it will have problems in the long run. It is used on children and parents, children absorb the good of their parents, and if they don't pay, something will happen. He will habitually ask for it, and when he grows up, he will produce all kinds of moths.

Only by letting the child also pay Weichang, he knows that there is nothing that should be done. Parents ask for something in return at the right time, such as letting their children give them answers.

3.Parents need to learn to let go.

It was sad to see the news that so-and-so had left. But when I saw the story of his family's living expenses, I was even more sad. Even if you are sick, you still have to keep working, because you have to pay for family living. And his youngest child is also an adult.

Adults still rely on sick relatives for living expenses? How bleak to say. Maybe it's love! But do children know how to love?

Let it go, don't let adult children still be reaching out party.

1. Arranged by parents.

Compared with other countries, Chinese parents do too much for their children, and they are "child-centered" and almost do everything at home. Parents do not let their children experience the hardships of life at all, but instead take on everything. When everything becomes "right", who would be grateful that a person has done what they should have done?

2. Lack of education.

When the teaching performance and the quality of teaching have become the only pursuit of the school, or even the life of the school, can gratitude education still find traces in the school? As a result, the relationship between teachers and students tends to be indifferent, and the traditional virtue education is weakened, resulting in the lack of quality of students to serve social and public undertakings.

3. Sheyan ridge will affect.

The lack of gratitude is lacking, and the root of deep coarse infiltration is in society. An educationalist said: "Children become indifferent and selfish, is the family, school, social gratitude culture, thrifty culture for a long time caused by the lack of culture, what we are missing now is the culture of gratitude and thrift, now we want to find them, not only from the beginning of preschool education, through the development and cultivation of emotional psychology and gradually imperceptible, but also need family, school, society in many aspects of efforts, to re-establish a good cultural atmosphere." ”

When the child is young, the parents work hard to raise and educate the child, so that the child grows up to repay the parents with a grateful heart to repay the parent's nurturing grace, but in real life, there are many parents who think that they have paid too much for their children, but the children do not know how to be grateful when they grow up. These parents will feel chilled because the higher the expectation, the greater the disappointment, unrealistic hopes, and the correct education methods are the key to raising grateful children.

1. The higher the expectation, the greater the disappointment, which is the primary reason why parents feel that they have paid a lot, but they cannot raise grateful children.

The primary reason why some parents feel that they have given too much, but their children do not know how to be grateful, is that the greater the hope, the greater the disappointment, these parents overestimate their own efforts, and at the same time make too high expectations for their children's returns. So when the reality does not match your expectations, you will feel very disappointed, in fact, the child may be doing well, but the parents' expectations are too high.

2. Unrealistic hopes will definitely not get satisfactory results.

When we encounter a thing, we will always predict the final result, hoping to achieve their ideal result, but the reality is often not as they wish, which will make them feel disappointed, those parents who think they have paid a lot, it is because of this reason that they have so much disappointment, and they have unrealistic hopes for their children's gratitude. So when the child's actual actions do not meet their hopes, they will feel lost, and even feel cold, in fact, the child is not wrong, it is the unrealistic hope of the parents, which leads to such a result.

3. The correct educational method is the key factor in cultivating children who know how to be grateful.

If a child wants to grow up healthily and eventually become a talent, he must receive a good education, and those children who know how to be grateful are because they have received the right education to have this quality, but in real life, some parents do not do ideal in educating their children, although they have paid a lot, but because of improper practices, the educational effect is not ideal, and the children who grow up in this state may not know how to be grateful. Parents are disappointed, but fundamentally, the problem is not the child's problem, the parents are the key to this outcome. If this is the case, parents must change their own education methods in order to raise children who truly know how to be grateful.

One. Why don't you know how to be grateful?

1.Parents don't take the lead.

If the child's parents are also yelling in front of their own parents, then the child will inevitably behave in the same way. If parents don't respect their elders, then children naturally don't know how to respect their elders.

2.Too much spoiling of children.

Some people still rely on their parents at the age when they should be responsible, and the parents of these people have always treated their children as children who have not grown up, making their children a veritable "mom treasure". These people rely on their parents, but they are not filial to their parents, they only lose the time and blindly ask for their parents.

3.Let the child build up the wrong values.

Parents' values often affect children's values as well, and if parents are money worshippers, then children tend to pursue luxury brands as well. If the parent is a person who respects others, spends wisely, and loves life, then the child will also tend to be positive and optimistic.

Two. What should parents do?

1.Parents need to be role models in front of their children.

If you want your child to learn to be grateful, then parents should first make the act of being grateful to others, so that the child understands the meaning of being grateful to others, rather than blindly teaching the child to learn to be grateful, but not doing anything themselves.

2.Learn certain language expressions.

In daily life, parents should learn to say more words of gratitude to their children, such as saying "thank you" to their children in time after they pour themselves a glass of water. Many parents may think that it is not necessary to say these words to their children, but in fact, these words will have a subtle effect on their children, and over time, children will gradually become grateful to others as a habit.

3.Let your child know more about his or her work routine.

Many children always listen to their parents say how hard it is, but in this way, the child does not really understand that this is the case, but it may cause the child to be bored, and the child often does not take these words of his parents into his heart. Therefore, parents should let their children know more about their daily work, let their children understand the hard work, in this way, let children learn to tremble, understand their parents, and be grateful to their parents.

In short, parents should start small things and sow a seed of gratitude in their children's hearts from an early age, which is the way to make children grateful.