Why do people complain endlessly?

Because people always hope that things can go in a good direction, but the reality is always not satisfactory, so they start complaining constantly.

We often say that the ideal is very plump, and the reality is very skinny. No matter what we do, we will have beautiful fantasies in our hearts, thinking about the beautiful marriage of this matter, but when the result of the matter really comes out, there is often a gap with what we think in our hearts, and we silently bear this gap in our hearts, but there is no way to vent, so we can only complain, endless complaints, complain about others, complain about this society, complain about the world.

When we were students, if we didn't do well in the exam, we would complain, complain that the person who wrote the question came up with such a difficult question, complain that the teacher didn't talk about similar knowledge points in class, and even complain that the class at the same table disturbed us, so that we couldn't listen to the class properly...Maybe the thing itself happened to us, but we don't want to admit that the most subjective reason is that we didn't listen carefully to the class and didn't study hard, but we always feel that we have done well enough, so we don't want to find reasons in ourselves, so we complain about the surrounding environment and the people around us. <>

When you are upset, you are willing to complain when you see everything. Because I walked without looking at the road and was knocked down, I would complain about the curbstone, and on a rainy day because I was too lazy to bring an umbrella, I would complain that God was not long-sighted. In the final analysis, our complaints all come from ourselves, from our inner fantasies, and from the unsatisfactory reality.

As long as the reality doesn't turn out as we think it does, it's impossible not to complain. In fact, complaining and complaining is not bad, it can calm our hearts, and then calm down and think quietly, find our own shortcomings, so as to correct, to work harder, to make us better.

In life, we always have to complain, remember to complain and check and fill in the gaps with peace of mind, for the better of us!

Everyone thinks that they are different, only sees the shortcomings of others and can't find their own problems, and complains about things as a matter of course. Throw away your mistakes and raise your own value to break free from the unfavorable environment, strive to make a muddy and unstained lotus, always greedy for everything better, but unfortunately you can only talk about it if you can't get it.

In fact, this is a common disease of animal humans, regardless of the standard of character, education, etc., as long as you still have life, you will always be unable to escape. It is said that he wants to be a person who is free from low-level interests and a noble person, which is really an inspiring slogan, but it is a pity that when he is not stabbed in the red dust rivers and lakes, he is always full of wind and rain, not only does he go to the low-level fun unconsciously.

No matter how hard you try, people are always different, there will be dissatisfaction and complaints when there is a gap, and everyone can only be equal to solve the problem, or everyone is out of low-level interest, but unfortunately it is not good, it is not realistic, and it can only make the problem a dead cycle of complaining and never disappearing.

Look at the complaints I've been complaining about now!

The meaning and help of complaining:

From the perspective of social psychology, emotion is a general term for a series of subjective cognitive experiences, and is a psychological and physiological state produced by the synthesis of multiple feelings, thoughts and behaviors. This means that emotions are not only subjective feelings, but also objective physiological reactions, and are purposeful behaviors.

It is not only a social expression, but also a pluralistic and complex comprehensive event. What's more, whether it is a positive emotion or a negative emotion, it is related to factors such as our mood, personality, temper, and the purpose of our behavior. Complaining about this also means that friends take scum:

All emotions are an expression of our hearts and provide us with useful information.

Clinical psychologist Arnold once proposed: "Emotions are the tendency to experience things that tend to be beneficial to perception and harmful to leave perception." This experiential tendency is accompanied by a corresponding pattern of physiological change of approach or avoidance.

So, it can be said that "complaining" actually has its own necessity for us, and it helps.

Everyone wants to be close to positive energy, away from negative energy, and complaining is a negative behavior, the wheel is negative energy, although we often hear the chicken soup for the soul of "don't complain", but everyone will complain more or less in a day or a period of time, I think you may have never seriously thought about what is the motivation for complaining? The next time you hear someone complain, try to think about what they need and what they want from the perspective of the motivation for complaining. You'll find that people complain in order to get their psychological needs met:

One of the motives for complaining: seeking attention.

Trying to get the attention of others is the main reason why people complain, and when one person complains to the other in a relationship, it is often not the thing that makes him or her unhappy, but most likely because he or she wants something. When you give the other person the attention they crave, they won't complain as much.

Some people say that there are two things in the world that are more fascinating than money, that is, recognition and praise, so please learn to use an appreciative eye, please don't be stingy with your praise, learn to find the shining point of others anytime and anywhere, and praise others.

One of the motives for complaining: shirking responsibility.

People complain because they are pushing their own responsibilities to others so that they can be freed from them. Complaining is used to tell people that it's not my job, I'm not wrong, and I'm not responsible. People complain that they can make excuses for not doing well, whether it is the bad weather, the reason for traffic jams, the reason why the exam questions are too difficult to exceed the curriculum, the reason why Party A asks too much, the boss arranges tasks randomly, the children are always naughty, etc., in short, it is the external environment, not their own reasons that cause the results that they do not expect.

The pessimists complain about the wind, the optimists wait for the wind to change, and the realistics adjust the sails. Only by taking responsibility for making yourself happy and happy can everything become easier. And you have to believe that you have that ability yourself!

This kind of person does not know how to respect others, and does not consider the feelings of others, and your marriage can only be said to be over, and it is impossible to be very happy.

One, yes, believe it.

Second, it is okay to believe in yourself.

3. Strive to be a better person.

Fourth, meet a better self.

How to find psychological balance without complaining! Hahahaha.

Why people complain, what they want to do and why they complain:

The World Without Complaining" says:

No matter what time it is, you can't go wrong to praise someone. Compliments must be sincere and heartfelt, otherwise others will think you are sarcastic and trying to control them.

People complain because they want to free themselves from some kind of responsibility. They feel that just a few negative comments about existing problems will free them from the responsibility of actively solving problems.

The only person who can take responsibility for your happiness and life is you. You have unlimited potential to respond to your own happiness.

Don't let the negative energy of others affect you, even if the other party provokes a "war" first, you don't necessarily have to respond, the reason why they want to criticize you is just to inflate their negative image and find a sense of security for themselves.

Many times, when you complain about what others are doing badly and try to prove that you are better at it, it means that you already feel inferior in this area.

In all kinds of relationships, people will use complaints to pull you to the side of the other person and make you stand with him so that he can have the power to win others.

Find out what motivates you to complain and then write it out, and thus change the way the relationship progresses:

Make a list of things you often complain about and write which of the following motives you complained about:

g et attention for attention.

r emove yourself from responsibility shirk responsibility.

I nspire envy to cause envy.

The power of the pocker's manipulation.

e xcuse poor performance to make excuses for poor performance.

Note that the above items can be checked.

If you weren't complaining about it, what would you say and do? Write down what you want to say and what you want to do.

You are 100% able to change your image of the relationship and thus change the progress of the relationship. Name a relationship that you find challenging, and what kind of person should you be if the challenging elements of the relationship were to no longer appear? How? List them one by one.

The World Without Complaining tells us: "When you complain, you must observe your inner needs more, so that you will understand the reason for complaining, so that you can regain your self-confidence, be a person who does not complain, your life will be full of sunshine, and you will get twice the result with half the effort."

When you want to complain, observe your inner needs, because our complaints often come from unmet inner needs. I believe that you will stay away from complaining and be a person who does not complain.