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The three views are different, and now it seems to be the core issue of the battle between many couples. Two people may have backgrounds, families, living conditions, etc., but they can't be exactly the same, so the three views often coincide. Some people say that if the three views do not agree, it is better to break up directly.
The basic principles of life are different, what else is there to say, I feel a little ruthless in an instant.
How can there be so many people who are born to create a good pair for you, and the mandarin duck and the duck fly? All agree on the same opinion, the three views are harmonious, and there is no contradiction? In fact, two people are not the same, how can they not have different concepts?
There must be, but it's important not to give up communication. When you encounter problems with each other, you may be mad, so don't be in a hurry to express them. Calm down, be sure, and stabilize yourself.
If you want to communicate with the other party, if you have a different economy or concept from the other party, you can see what the other party wants and how big the gap is. Then find your weaknesses and work hard. If the other person's request is reasonable and can be met, give it a try.
If it's really unacceptable,...Or if it is too much, just communicate and make the other party give up. If they insist on each other's words, then they can only say that they should let each other go.
Days are not meant to be difficult.
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Two people with different three views, to be honest, most of them are difficult to get to the end, maybe you won't find anything big bad when you first start together, but because the three views are different, over time, you will find that the two people's concepts on many things are very different, I insist that my idea is right, you insist that your idea is right, and then sometimes two people will quarrel because of these things, and slowly there will be more and more contradictions between the two people.
Couples like each other very much, and they will definitely not be willing to separate because of the difference in the three views, and they will feel unwilling to give anyone to think about it later, so if you love him very much, or you have different views but you really want to be together, then try to run in with each other, understand and tolerate each other, I always feel that if you really love a person, you will more or less tolerate each other, so in the process of getting along, slowly try to make the three views of the two people as close to each other as possible.
Of course, it is impossible to say that one person unilaterally changes himself, when two people have different views, they can feel each other, so you can talk about it well and change it for each other, you don't have to completely change your three views, and it is impossible to completely change, so what you have to do is just to run in and tolerate some different views of the other party, of course, it is based on the three views are relatively positive.
If in the process of getting along, you find that the two of you really can't get along because of the three views, then it is better to choose to break up, even if you are reluctant to break up for love now, but in the end you may break up because of different views and quarrels, or you can get along, and then break up when you are really tired in the end, so that you will not regret it too much in the future.
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If the three views are different, then you first have to consider whether you love each other and can make a series of changes because of him? If you love the other person enough to tolerate the other person, then I think you can choose to be with him. Because the world is so big, there are very few people you want to live with each other, and it is not easy to meet someone you really love.
You can consider whether you can overcome the fact that you have three different views. You have to be clear about how deep your three views are different. Only by clarifying the degree to which your three views are different can you know what to do, and to prepare your mentality is how long you should work hard to change this matter.
At this time, you also have to work hard with your other half to do this, just like love is not something that one person can have, it is a relationship that two people work together to manage together, so changing the three views is not something that can be done by one person's efforts, he also needs two people to work together to change, so that this matter can become more in line with your respective inner thoughts.
You can communicate with each other about this matter and explain the seriousness of this matter, so that you and the other person can have this cognitive understanding. Both of them make some changes to each other, encourage each other and comfort each other in the process of change. I believe it will be very simple.
You will also grow up slowly in this change, cherish each other's relationship more, and know that this relationship is not easy to come by. You have also learned the correct opening mode for two people to be together.
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People with different views will inevitably have some friction when they get along together, because the difference in three views is most directly manifested in the fact that two people will have different views on the same thing, and the way two people do things may be completely different.
So in this case, if you don't agree with your boyfriend, you may have a greater chance of quarreling than those couples with the same three views, and many concentrated outbursts of emotions are caused by the accumulation of a little bit of trivial things, so usually the two don't get along more times, and you are likely to end up unhappy after a long time.
Therefore, there are two ways in front of you if the two people do not agree with each other, one is that you finally let the friction occur, let the temper of the two play freely, and then break up. The other is to tolerate each other a little bit, and everyone makes some changes and compromises for the sake of the other. In fact, there are advantages but disadvantages for people with different views, the advantage is that if the three views do not agree, you can look at the problem from multiple angles, you can be more comprehensive, you can see more sides of the world, and sometimes it may provide you with one more choice, and the two can complement each other.
But you must be fully patient with each other, you must not lose your temper because of a little thing, you have different opinions to discuss rationally, and think more from the other party's point of view, and then everyone has something to discuss, after all, there must be a run-in period for any relationship, and the three views must be run-in.
But if it's really not suitable, if you also feel that it is not necessary for him, then why should you not get along with yourself, you have to find a rival to be with, and it is not a good choice to break up with him.
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When you and your boyfriend have differences in terms of three views, here are some suggestions:
Open communication: Be honest with your boyfriend about your differences in values and share your opinions and concerns. Listen to his point of view and respect each other's opinions and beliefs.
Respect for diversity: Accepting and respecting each other's differences is an important factor in building a healthy relationship. Together, you can explore how to build a foundation of mutual respect and understanding based on different values.
Find common ground: Try to find your common interests and values, which can be your point of connection. By sharing common interests and activities, we can get to know each other and have fun together.
Grow with each other: Respect each other's growth and change process. People's values and perspectives change over time and through experience. Try to support and understand each other as they grow.
Seek compromise: When necessary, both parties can seek compromise and balance. Take into account each other's needs and values to find a solution that is acceptable to both parties.
Professional help: If your differences are clearly in conflict with important values, you may want to consider seeking professional help, such as guidance from a marriage or relationship counselor. Professionals can help you explore and solve questions about values.
Most importantly, building a healthy relationship requires effort and compromise on both sides. Respecting each other's differences, communicating openly, and working together to find common ground and solutions can help you deal with the challenges of your differences and build a stronger and more harmonious relationship.
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This situation is normal, after all, we are different people, the world is big, thousands of people are special, there must be different opinions. Similar to your situation, if you don't think the same then seek common ground while reserving differences, since you are boyfriend and girlfriend, there are a lot of things to experience in the future, because of a problem with different three views, you don't know what to do, so what should you do when you face the big and small trivialities in life in the future. If you can unify it, you will be unified, and if you can't unify it, you should choose that more scientific point of view, and seeking common ground while reserving differences is a condition that two people must have when they are together, otherwise there will be many, many problems sooner or later in the future.
Two people are two ideas, but you are still boyfriend and girlfriend, so in the face of such problems, it is the students who study hard, not the students who start to work hard. In fact, it is you who are often painful when you are too entangled, what can you do if the three views are the same, and what can you do if the three views are different. Life has to go on, no matter how big things we go through, we still have to eat three meals a day, which doesn't mean anything at all.
So take a step back and open the sky, and endure the calm for a while. Don't worry about these indifferent little things, it's good not to talk about this if the three views are different, how simple the problem can be solved, but you are at a loss here.
Now there are too many lovers like you, if they all sometimes don't know what to do, wouldn't they all be messed up. Why didn't the two people find out that the three views were not correct when they first met, and they found out when they were together, don't you think it's too late? The situation is very easy to solve, it is nothing more than two situations, it is really unbearable, just break up.
You can tolerate seeking common ground while reserving differences, so the result must be clear in your heart, and I still wish you to grow old together.
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If you don't agree with your boyfriend, you can try the following four methods:
1. Accept differences. When there is a disagreement between the three views, it is very necessary to accept the differences. You must know that people are born and grew up in different environments, and the education they receive is also different, so it is normal for them to have different views and different values.
For the three views, because of the difference, you can accept it calmly, and don't raise the simple little things to a higher level, if so, then it may involve some of the things you are most unwilling to face, and there will be a big misunderstanding.
2. Learn to respect. Mutual respect for each other's three views is the only way to integrate the two sides, and it is also the most appropriate ability for adults to get along. Although the three views are different, different world views and values cannot say who is higher and who is lower.
Mutual respect is to reflect a person's cultivation, even if I don't agree with you, but I can also understand the different three views. A person who does not respect the three views of others can only be a frog at the bottom of a well, because you have been living in your world and cannot see the world of laughter outside. A truly humble person who knows how to respect the three views of others and understands everything in the world can have different ways of interpreting it.
3. Seek common ground while reserving differences. First of all, don't try to convince the other person to press.
Thinking and doing things with one's own ideas is the formation of people's values.
It is often the result of accumulation over time, and it is never easy to change.
Then try to put yourself in the other person's shoes as much as possible, after all.
When you get married, you have to think more about why the other party did this.
Some understanding, tolerance, and choosing to get married and live together, you want.
Sincerely accept the differences between each other, seek common ground while reserving differences, and put it.
The respective values of both sides are laid out and put together, this.
pcs"Hybrids"It's no longer just about each person.
but belong to two people to share new values.
Look, this time to get along may"A little bit of a heart.
pass"。If you can't communicate after communicating, don't force it.
Seek communication, go with the flow, and live your own life, yourself.
To find happiness, don't pin your happiness on your spouse, in reality marriage is only a part of life and not the whole thing.
Fourth, empathy. The essence of empathy is to put yourself in the other person's shoes, know what the other person is thinking, what they need, think what others think, and understand first.
Adults' three views have been stereotyped, it is not easy to change, it is normal for everyone to have different opinions on a thing, but it will lead to constant quarrels between husband and wife. In the face of the disagreement between your spouse and your three views, you must not think about changing his three views, but to accept, understand, adapt, and influence, don't always think about changing the other party to adapt to yourself, but learn to understand each other, and try to adjust yourself, after all, it is difficult to change others, but it is possible to change yourself. The so-called love is to change the other party a little bit, accept the parts that you can't accept, and slowly run in the three views, which is the most practical thing to laugh at.
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I think it's a common situation to have differences in three views with your boyfriend, and communication is very important when there are differences in certain concepts or values.
1.Open communication. You should be more open to communicate with your boyfriend about the differences in your three views, and express your own views, opinions and feelings.
At the same time, it is also necessary to understand your boyfriend's position and opinions, which can avoid misunderstandings, enhance understanding, and find an acceptable position. In communication, we should also learn to compromise and make concessions to each other.
2.Understand differences and embrace them. It can be understood that it is normal for the three views to be different, and everyone's growth environment and experience are different, and the three views are naturally different. On the basis of embracing differences, we can try to find common ground, which can help to promote understanding and encourage inclusion.
3.Set a clear bottom line. In the case where the differences are relatively large and difficult to adjust, we may consider clearly stipulating certain contradictory viewpoints or positions as our own bottom line and principles.
This can define differences in certain major value judgments and avoid further contradictions and conflicts in the future. Xiang Ran Mountain: This needs to be accepted and clarified by both sides.
4.Try to influence change. If Duan Dou cannot accept the differences in the three views, he can appropriately try to influence or change the other party's views on certain points of view on the basis of mutual understanding.
This needs to be guided and reasoned in a gradual way, rather than forced change. Change often takes time, and it takes a lot of patience and understanding.
5.Break up when emotionally detached. If the trust and emotion of both parties are difficult to maintain under the difference in the three views, it may indicate that the Chinese and Chinese are actually not compatible with each other in some deep values, and the ideal way is to choose to break up.
Although this is difficult to accept, it can also avoid greater conflicts, quarrels and even injuries in the future.
In short, when you have different views and disagreements, don't let your emotions control your actions. Discuss your views calmly and try to find a solution to the problem, sometimes compromise is the best way to resolve a disagreement. If you can't come to a complete agreement, then considering a compromise may make both of you satisfied.
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