How to educate adolescent rebellious boys, and how to discipline adolescent rebellious boys?

When parents encounter their children who are rebellious, disobedient, uncooperative, and non-communicative, they must not think that their children's rebellion is a challenge to their own majesty, but to admit that rebellion is the result of children's physiological maturity, cognitive improvement, and self-identity development, and is a manifestation of their growth, which is a good thing, at least a good start. Parents should not blindly deny their children's unruliness, but should affirm their children's courage to explore themselves. After getting the approval of their parents, the child may not be so rebellious, at least not to a deeper extent.

It is necessary to take rebellion as an opportunity to adjust the role and style of parenting in a timely manner.

Rebelliousness means that when the child grows up, parents need to adjust their parenting role in time, and should change from a leading educator to a companion who accompanies the child's growth. Accompaniment means that the child is the main one, and the parents are in a non-dominant position; It means a kind of unspoken support and recognition, and it means an equal friendship.

The rebellious problem of adolescent children not only reminds parents to change their parenting roles in time, but also reminds parents of the mistakes of family education in the early stage, which is an important opportunity for parents to change their parenting style. Psychological research has shown that authoritative parenting is most conducive to the resolution of adolescent problems and the shaping of children's personality. Authoritative parenting is characterized by having clear rules and requirements for the child's behavior, but taking into account the child's needs and ideas when making rules and making decisions, listening to and accepting the child's opinions, and explaining the requirements and reasons for the child's obedience.

It is necessary to understand the type of rebellion in your child and prescribe the right medicine.

There are three main types of rebellious behaviors in adolescent children: irritable - violent resistance to the demands of parents and teachers, often quarreling or losing temper with parents, and sometimes having a cold war with parents; Silent - unwilling to communicate with adults, indifferent to things, unresponsive to parents' words, dislike to contact with teachers; Yang Feng Yin Violation Type - Agreeing to the adult's request in front of the adult, but his own behavior is the opposite, the parents say everything on the surface, but still go their own way.

Parents can respond differently to different types of rebellious behavior. Don't be tough on grumpy rebellious children; For silent and rebellious children, wait patiently and communicate slowly; Children who are rebellious against the yang and yin make the children feel sincere.

Behind the rebellion is the development characteristics of the child at a specific stage and the different inner needs of the individual, I hope that the parents of adolescent children will be a caring parent, observe the characteristics of the child, understand the needs of the child. As long as you work hard to be a caring parent, be aware of your child's rebellious behavior, don't push your child out, accept your child, and believe that your child's rebellious problem is only a problem in the process of growing up. However, if parents do not adjust their home education methods in time and do not provide assistance for their children's growth, children may also go further and further on the road of rebellion.

The author is a professor at Beijing Normal University, director of the Institute of Mental Health and Education, and the author of "Understanding Children: A Practical Guide for Psychologists".

Parents are also menopausal.

First, you should communicate with your child often, try to understand your child, don't show the prestige of a parent when talking to your child, treat your child as a friend, and let your child speak freely in front of you without any sense of inhibition. In this way, the child will not lie, and can also grasp the child's thoughts in time and correct the wrong ones in time. If there is something to talk to the child, do not impose your own opinions on the child, only make suggestions and let the child think for himself.

Second, make your child feel that you love him very much, but that you still have authority in front of him. That is, there must be rules, and you can't do whatever you want. As long as you reason with your child, your child will be obedient.

Third, parents should lead by example, play an exemplary role, talk count, and don't say what you can't do. In this way, children can be taught well. Fourth, there should be a method to educate children, praise and encouragement, criticism and punishment are appropriate, we must persuade children with patience, we cannot force children, and we must let children understand from their hearts that the mistakes are wrong, and what things must be preached, not scolded.

Patience from parents is the best way to educate their children.

Caring for the main education is supplemented, we should communicate more, understand the real thoughts of the children, do not always put on the majestic stand of parents, and try to shorten the distance.

Refuse to fight violence with violence, and guide him more from life, this age is like this, and he will be more mature in the future.

Adolescence is a stage of children's growth, and the rebellious period is a stage of children's psychological changes, these two stages have met together, adolescent children's temper makes people wonder and understand, they are easily angry, irritated Parents should pay attention to it, education at this time can not be scolding, parents should change the way of education at this time, to change the tone of speech with children, and treat children to be equal and discuss. Let your child be actively involved in the big things in the family. Parents lead by example and encourage their children to try and make mistakes.

Give your child some freedom. Understand the child from the child's psychology and weaken the child's rebellion, I hope it can help you!

1. The child's original academic performance was actually good, but suddenly his grades dropped sharply; often find excuses to skip school and not go to school, or even serious enough to want to drop out of school;

2. Coping with studying, not writing homework, taking learning as a painful thing, and going to tutorial classes before will not help;

3. You have to do whatever you want, without any moderation, rebellious and disobedient to discipline, often working against your parents, and running away from home because of your temper;

4. Children are obsessed with mobile phones, addicted to online games, and are nauseous, dizzy, grumpy and even hysterical at the mention of learning;

Especially during the holidays, the addiction to mobile games is more serious, and I don't write homework or study!

As a mother, I tried my best to lead my child to the right path, but my child was still obsessed!

Seeing that the child is rebellious and tired of school, does not like to study, and yells at me, I can only do it in a hurry!

Faced with the fact that my child's grades were at the bottom of the class and grade, I invited a lot of teachers, but the child still didn't study well, and I was half angry!

The door is closed when the child comes home, and we speak less than ten words a month, and I am especially worried that the child will go to the extreme point that I can't control it!

The child's problems are getting worse and worse, and I am so anxious that I can't sleep every night.

I can't afford to delay my child's problems! If something goes wrong, you have to deal with it immediately!

By chance, I heard a speech by a family education expert on the Internet, which mentioned that the family dual-track system is particularly good, providing methods for many parents who encounter educational problems, and can completely change the problem of children's boredom in school.

I checked it according to what the teacher said, and it was said on the Internet that it was developed by a family education research institute. I tried to contact their expert teachers.

After consulting with an expert teacher, I also helped me reflect on the following reasons:

1. It is because we lack scientific methods, and education is only based on feelings and experience, which leads to unsound children's personalities;

2. Always preach, nag, and compare with other children, causing children to be rebellious or inferior;

3. I am busy with work, all the requirements of the child are met, and the education method cannot keep up, resulting in more and more children's stinky problems;

4. Spoiling children too much, arranging and compromising with children, causing children to become more rebellious and have a bad temper;

5. Always want to rely on "criticism and scolding" to deal with problems, and the child "bends and beats into a trick", and gradually the child becomes more and more lonely in his heart, causing problems such as personality distortion.

In half a month, the changes in the child shocked me:

After I tried the method taught to me by the teacher, my child has simply changed as a person, and there have been obvious changes: willing to communicate with me, basically don't touch the game, occasionally use the mobile phone to check a profile, and I know that I have learned, and the mock test results have also risen, and I am a lot more sensible, I know that it is not easy for my parents, and I also took the top three exams in the grade last time, I am really happy, and I know to help me do housework during the holidays, and my heart is warm.

At the beginning, I promised the teachers at the graduate school that if I helped my children change the problem, I would help them publicize it.

In the daily life of the child, parents should let the child be independent, tap the child's self-care ability, secondly, to be patient and persistently with the child to do what he likes, close to the child, find the advantages, give encouragement, and learn to "show weakness", and finally let the child learn to take responsibility for himself.

1. Face up to your child's rebellious psychology and don't have prejudices.

If you encounter a child with a particularly strong rebellious mentality, you must be clear that this is a normal phenomenon. In fact, rebellious psychology also contains many positive qualities, such as strong self-awareness, strong competitiveness, and the ability to innovate. Parents should be good at discovering the creative qualities and pioneering consciousness in the rebellious mentality, and guide them reasonably.

As long as it is properly guided, rebellious psychology can play a positive role in modern society.

2. Don't blame the child blindly.

China's traditional education - the concept of "if you don't fight, you can't become successful" has been deeply rooted in the hearts of the people. Many parents think that as long as they make mistakes, they will be punished, and they rarely consider their children's self-esteem, and when their children make mistakes, they will preach in front of outsiders, and even use force against their children. In fact, the procedure of criticism is first and foremost:

Point to the behavior, confirm that what he is doing is wrong, and then express the distress that the child's shortcomings have caused to the parent"Your behavior makes mom angry, and I don't think my child will do that......"It's useless to just reason without talking about feelings, then express your expectations to your child and then encourage him"Mom believes that you will do a good job next time, and I believe you will not make such a mistake again"。

3. Leave some space for your child.

When the child is rebellious and emotionally agitated, parents should not be angry, as this will only make the atmosphere more rigid. The right thing to do is to treat it coldly and ignore his willfulness. When the child threatens to cry, don't be soft-hearted, you can let him cry for a while, and then educate and induce him after he calms down.

In the process of dealing with the child's emotions, parents do not need to spend too much time and do not need to spend too many words, as long as the parents understand the child's feelings and wait by the side, he will change. At the same time, parents should also know how to let go and give their children moderate restraint. Many people can't let go because they don't believe in their children, as long as they believe in their children, we will find that they will develop and bury as we expect.

1. Reduce quarrels with children.

Puberty happens to be the case of the child's rebellion, and the boys in the rebellious period are very impetuous because of their straighter tempers, and they feel that their parents can only scold themselves, and it is not easy to say anything else, so they have been arguing with their parents and going against their parents. In fact, adolescent boys are under a lot of pressure to work and study, and at the same time they feel lonely and have no one to understand them. Parents must have a tolerant attitude towards their children, and do not have to let their own mentality endanger cultural education children, which will make children disgusted with their parents and unwilling to communicate with their parents.

2. You don't have to have a big prejudice against your child.

Adolescent rebellion is a regular occurrence, and boys at this time are very competitive and strong, which can be considered a good quality for boys. Parents should be good at discovering some good qualities in their children's rebellious period, and to effectively apply these good qualities, they can give full play to some active effects.

3. Give your child enough freedom.

You can try to give the rebellious boy to go out alone, parents don't have to discipline their own children too much, let the child have their own alone indoor space, to do what they have been dreaming of for a long time. If you encounter a problem, you can talk to your child, but you can't take your child's academic performance as the leader in every communication, which will make your child's work pressure higher, and you can't communicate emotionally with your parents later. In response to some problems that occur in children, parents should communicate with their children in a scientific and reasonable way.

4. Communicate with children in a reasonable way.

Children in the rebellious period will always have some personal behaviors that their parents cannot grasp. For example, dyeing hair, wearing weird hair shapes, wearing some weird clothes and pants, and some personal behaviors that are "non-mainstream girls" to put it bluntly. At this time, parents do not have to feel that there is anything wrong with the child's mental substance, but should communicate with the child in a reasonable way, so that the child can figure out his own shortcomings.

Parents should not put greater psychological pressure on their children, which will make them dislike learning and be more rebellious.

5. Be tolerant of some of the child's personal behaviors.

Sometimes parents are very prone to emotional instability due to their children, so they often carry out hail and cultural education for their children. In fact, in the case of a child in the rebellious period, it is more necessary for the parents to accept and be careful, rather than the parents blindly blaming. During the child's rebellious period, parents should allow the child to make some mistakes, everyone makes mistakes, parents should guide the child reasonably, emphasize that the child's wrong area is **, and assist the child to find a way to deal with it.

Parents are all role models in their children's hearts, and children who are in rebellion are quick to imitate others, and parents can make their children imitate stronger when they are role models.