What s the funniest cow you ve ever heard someone brag about?

When bathing in the large bath, I heard a middle-aged man boast about his own luxurious bath, in which the bath has different temperatures ranging from 45 to 75°. Is this a bath or hair removal?

My mother always said to my daughter, "Grandma will buy you a house and a big car in the future." "It's ridiculous to think about when you can save enough for your 2,000 yuan pension.

I have a cousin who likes to be blind when he drinks too much, and he used to say, "If I had been born decades earlier, the War of Resistance would not have lasted so long." ”

A friend of mine accidentally joined an illegal fundraising organization that claimed to build civilian helicopters. Only 1,000 yuan is required to join the membership, and if a member's family member is seriously ill, the organization will send a helicopter to pick up the patient ......

The most ridiculous thing is that Yang Lan's husband Wu Zheng wrote a post on Weibo to remember Margaret Thatcher and recalled having lunch with Margaret Thatcher and her husband in 2006.

A Huawei guy at the mobile phone counter is selling the prepared P10,He said,The lens of P10 is equivalent to a 1W Leica lens,The lens of P10Plus is equivalent to a 3W Leica lens I was scared a lot。。。

When she was in college, a girl (black and ugly) said that she had two handsome sweethearts, the rich two and the official two, and she broke her blood in order to fight for her head. The most surprising thing was that I was skeptical that it might be true.

"Talking nonsense" is also called "bragging". Bragging, a poker game. Popular everywhere, the game is very interesting, and the rules are simple and easy to learn, whether you can win or not depends on the gamer's braggadocio and ability to see through the illusion.

How to play:

The dealer takes 1 to 8 (two decks of cards 1 to 16) cards, deducts them, and announces them as several cards, such as"Two 7s"。The next family can choose from the following methods.

1. Don't believe:

How to play the game: Except for their own file which hold, anyone else can not believe) then turn over those hole cards, if it is a cheat, then all the cards in this round are owned by the person who is turned over; If it's not a scam, it's owned by someone who doesn't believe it. Then it is up to the winner to continue to play and shout.

2, believe and follow:

The person who follows the card can only follow one to four cards, and then bid: one is to add, that is, to add cards on the basis of the original, such as the house"Two 7s", so to speak"Plus heel 1 piece of 7", you can also call other personal accounts to cover the past, for example"2 sheets of 8", but two conditions must be met, either there are more cards than the player who came first, or the point power is greater for the same number of cards.

3. Give up:

Expressing belief in the previous shouter's card, he gave up the opportunity to follow or add cards, and it was the next company's turn to deal with it. If it is your turn to play a card after a row, the card becomes a circle and will no longer be turned over and will be used as a knockout card. If the next family does not go to the house more than three times, and the three times the family is true, then the third time you do not believe it is automatically considered to have given up.

The size of the card:

a，2，3，..10, J, Q, K (Ace is a free card, i.e. A can be treated as any other card).

Win or lose:

The first to play all the cards in the hand is the winner, and all the others are the losers. The loser deducts the number of cards in his hand multiplied by the score represented by each card, and the winner wins all the loser's points.

Exception Handling:

If a player does not respond within 40 seconds, the game program will call them quit.

Those who leave the game abnormally during the game will be deducted 104 times times by the points represented by each card in addition to the number of disconnections added by 1 time.

The greatest braggart in history, do you know what it is?

I had a high school classmate who kept boasting about being a double major, and I always thought he was awesome. As a result, it was debunked by another classmate last night.,It turned out that he just studied a major in a junior college.,And then after the college upgrade, he transferred to another major.,As for last night's scolding war, I won't be on the picture.,The scolding is too ugly.。

When the sophomore class met and a student in the class swore in front of the class that one day he was going to merge all the companies in the world into one company, and that he was going to be the only boss in the world, and everyone in the class laughed, and it was the kind of laugh that looked down on him.

I remember having dinner with a developer and several employees of the engineering department, and one of the surveyors told us that his family had a villa of more than 400 square meters in Shenzhen, and his father was in the import and export business in Shenzhen, and he could earn more than 10 million yuan a year. We were stunned when we heard it, and then we saw his resume by chance, and it turned out that his father was an employee of an agricultural machinery station in a nearby county.

In the literary and youth world, the boasting skills are better than Liu Yong and Li Zhen, and Teacher Li Bai is the best. Li Bai bragged quite unrestrained, and the text had "The young master is called Huaisu, the cursive world is called Dubu, and the ink pond flies out of the Beiming fish"; Wu Ze "kills one person in ten steps, and does not stay for a thousand miles." Brush off your clothes and go away, and hide yourself and your name".

When I was in high school, I liked to play online games DNF. Later, I met a classmate who was in junior high school, and we started talking. Talking about games, he said that those online games have been played and there is nothing fun, and asked me if I play games?

I said, "Play!" I've been playing that dnf.

He asked me how I was playing, and I said okay, I was at the full level, and now I will brush the abyss every day and practice the trumpet. He said, "It's level 70!"

I used to play to the full level, so I didn't play, it was boring. This profession, that profession, what equipment or something, I can't stop talking."

The most powerful braggart is the first to recommend the 32nd American ** Truman. In World War II, the United States dropped an atomic bomb on the Japanese mainland on August 6, 1945, and another on Hiroshima, Japan, on August 10. On August 14, Truman** ordered Japan to surrender immediately and unconditionally, or we would drop thousands of atomic bombs on Japan.

Because the Soviet Union had already sent troops to northeast China at that time, coupled with the terrifying atomic bomb, the Japanese emperor immediately announced his unconditional surrender on August 15.

Ni Zan was a famous artist in the late Yuan Dynasty and early Ming Dynasty, a wealthy fifth generation who was among the three major families in the south of the Yangtze River, and his main business when he was young was to invest in real estate and collect antiques, calligraphy and paintings. Unfortunately, later the Ni family's fortune declined. But after all, he has been at the helm of a local leading enterprise, even in the cold winter of capital, Ni Zan still maintains his consistent bullish strength.

The people around me are more and more able to brag about what I can do, and I feel that everyone is very good at bragging.

2. It's still this classmate, at that time, there was a house behind her house, the kind with an elevator. Because it was the second building in the small county town, I was very curious to ask her what house was being built there, and she told me that it was her house, and the top floor was full of her house. I simply believed it, and it wasn't until after it was built that I knew it was the internal medicine building of the county hospital!

It really kills her.

3. I went to Yanji during the May Day holiday this year, and on the train back, I was sleeping, and I was suddenly woken up by the chat of two ladies opposite, so I squinted and listened to their conversation for a while. The general meaning is that their boss is very powerful, the kind of person who Ma Yun has to call his uncle when he sees him, and one of the ladies is deeply favored by their boss, and she will be with her at any banquet, but it is only the relationship between the boss and the employee. At that time, I thought, you have such a powerful boss, then you must be also very powerful and qualified.

Why are you still squeezing the train with us, talking loudly without quality, and throwing melon seed skins all the time.

A rational boast about buying a house.

In 2007, the TV series "Princess Little Sister" was launched, and in the first episode, the heroine distributed flyers to the real estate company on the street to promote, and there was a line that was impressive, that is, the heroine used her salary to calculate how many years she could buy a house, and found that she needed to "not eat or drink for 400 years, and work from the Qing Dynasty to buy a toilet".

Of course, this is an exaggeration of the lines of the TV series, but in recent years, real estate has become more and more noisy, and housing prices in the capital have become higher and higher.

In my opinion, under idealistic conditions, it would be appropriate to buy a house with a salary over a period of 7 to 10 years.

From the point of view of employment time, if you are 25 years old when you join the job, work for seven to ten years, it is the time to start a family, and the salary savings add up to buy a house is the most ideal state.

From the perspective of wage level and housing prices, although today's housing prices are rising higher and higher, the cost of human resources is also getting higher and higher, and the development of high-tech enterprises is getting stronger and stronger.

A little stronger, seven to ten years is enough time for you to be promoted from an ordinary employee to a department head or even a director or manager, the salary level at this time is absolutely not the same, if you make a greater contribution to the company, the year-end performance bonus will also be very attractive, plus the savings in recent years, buying a house is not a problem.

I think it's all idealistic, and the real estate market is unpredictable today, and only with high wages and good economic conditions can we not be afraid of high or low housing prices.

Recently, Liu Qiangdong publicly said that Ma Yun bragged, 'Ma Yun claimed that there are 7 million merchants' Liu Qiangdong pointed out that in fact, 90% are zombie users. In view of Liu Qiangdong's accusations, Ma Yun also publicly stated that he was indeed bragging. But Jack Ma once said that Alibaba's most successful thing is to give birth to companies like JD.com.

A typical cooked duck with rotten meat and not a rotten mouth. Obviously his biggest competitor, but he talks like his son. But Liu Qiangdong is not much better.

actually said, 'I am face blind, and I can't tell whether I am beautiful or not, so I married my sister with milk tea not because she is beautiful, because he doesn't know if she is beautiful or not' I want to ask Liu Qiangdong Are you blind? It's not because she's good-looking, it's because she looks like your daughter. This kind of insulting words about someone else's IQ come out.

I can only appear to be very low.

I don't brag anyway, some people brag to the sky, they don't have any ability, and they never count.

The greatest braggart in history, do you know what it is?

I think that the biggest bull that Master Ben bragged about is that I once said to my parents: I want to earn a lot of money to support them and let them live a good life! As a result, I have never been able to fulfill this wish, and I am really guilty!

I still remember when I was in high school, I boasted about this Haikou to my parents, but after I really experienced the hardships of making money in society, I regretted saying that sentence, because it is really easy to use money, but it is really difficult to make money, especially students like this who can't do anything, what do you say you can do? I really have to move bricks!

Because I couldn't hold on for a while, I missed the college entrance examination in high school, of course, of course, people with ambition like me are going to come out to work, but I also said earlier that I'm just a student, I can't do anything, I really wanted to move bricks, but my parents didn't agree, so I found a job in a supermarket for me, so how could I live idlely!

After all, you also know that you can't make any money in the supermarket every month, so I got all the money to go to the ** ticket, of course, I have no experience, and I can only lose a fine light, at that time it was really my mother angry enough, once my mother was angry with me and fainted, because that time I took the money they saved to invest in a franchise store, but I studied for two days and didn't want to learn, so they beat me, think about the things I did before I feel stupid!

Later, I finally woke up and went back to school to study hard, and now I have found a stable job, and I have met someone I like, if I hadn't woken up at that time, I must still be moving bricks! Ha ha!