What should I do if I am forced to marry by my family? What to do if you are forced to marry by your

I'm sure there are many people who have been forced to marry by their families, but what should we do when we are faced with this situation?

We don't want to disobey our parents, but we don't want to tear our faces with them, we always feel that we have violated this social morality by making some radical and radical performances to our parents, we should honor our parents, respect our parents, and obey our parents' wishes, but who told us that we must listen to our parents from an early age? It is precisely because of such a social phenomenon that most children will decide their future life because of forced marriage.

In fact, things are very simple, you can refuse the forced marriage of your family, tell them what kind of life you want and want to live, just like what kind of person you want to be with, that is your own business, without their consent.

There is a logical relationship in this, that is, your parents are unhappy with you. You are happy, your parents are unhappy first, and then they are cool.

Looking at the relationship between the two before and after, the second one is the best choice, because the second choice is chosen according to your own wishes. And the first one is the choice of most obedient and sensible children, to obey their parents.

Later, you will complain to your parents, at the beginning, if you hadn't forced me to get married, I wouldn't have lived with this person, I wouldn't have lived with this person, and I wouldn't have such a bleak life.

You don't have to worry about your resistance, your rejection will make your parents' hearts, because you have chosen the right and happy path, they will also be happy for you, your parents are not forced to marry for their own happiness, they just want to let you, want you to live a good life, life is not so hard, but they forget that your happiness is their greatest happiness. <>

At this time, you have to make them understand that your happiness is their greatest happiness.

Why do parents like forced marriage? In fact, not only parents like this, but also the so-called seven aunts and eight aunts, and maybe we ourselves are the same.

Perhaps it can be said that this is a topic that the whole society is anxious about, why haven't you married and started a family yet? What happened to you? Are you abnormal?

Marriage and childbirth constitute a complete family, so that it seems to live like a normal person, so that the inner incompleteness and the inner broken heart can be escaped.

Perhaps this is a deeper reason than filial piety. Therefore, in the countryside and even in the city, once something happens, they want to be happy, and give children who are psychologically incomplete, socially incomplete, or even physically incomplete, and use the way of chongxi to deceive people, children, and themselves, which is to use the superficial facts of a complete family to escape the deep facts of brokenness.

In the eyes of parents, no matter what the children are, having a family means that they are normal people, be good, get married!

But the truth is that broken hearts lead to broken families, and broken families raise children with broken hearts, and they are just reincarnated from generation to generation!

Many parents may overdo this by using superficial integrity to escape inner brokenness, but inner brokenness is uncomfortable, and in this regard, human beings should be common.

In Poland, there is a movie about a married man who is asked out by his ex-girlfriend on Christmas Eve to help him find his missing partner! The man guessed the truth, the ex-girlfriend is lonely and needs to be accompanied! But he didn't say it, and silently accompanied her to look for a night, and finally his ex-girlfriend said that she had spent a few Christmas Eves alone, and if she lived like this again today, she would commit suicide.

The end of the film is also very warm, the man comes home, his wife is still waiting for him on the sofa, but she is asleep, he goes over and hugs his wife, and the wife wakes up, without a word of blame, but hugs the man tightly, as if he is the one who needs to be comforted!

Brokenness is everywhere, pain is everywhere, the reunion of the Spring Festival, the establishment of a family, are all lonely souls looking for links, but I hope we can really find complete happiness through marriage, rather than pursuing formal integrity.

Although I'm only a junior, my mom has already hinted that I should find a boyfriend, and if I find a boyfriend, it's best to get married after graduation, and she even told me that she has a little sister, and that little sister has a lot of excellent boys in her hands, which means that if I can't find a boyfriend, he's going to force me to go on a blind date.

Please, I'm only a junior and I'm still the flower of my motherland, why did you force me to find my other half so early? It is simply the destruction of the flowers of the Motherland. My mom was so mad, but I know why she's so mad, because next door to me, a little sister of '99 who is younger than me is married, she is unmarried, and she gave birth to a little boy in early June of this year.

My mother went to see the little boy every day, and she thought it was so cute, so cute that she thought the child was her grandson. She also wants to hold a grandson, so that she will have something to do and have children to play with.

I didn't want to pay attention to her at all, but she hit ** twice in three days to urge me to find a partner, get married quickly, and cried and told me that she was afraid that she would not see me get married and have children when she died. I don't feel sorry for my mother. I relented and promised her to find a partner quickly.

But as soon as I calmed down, I felt that I had been deceived by her, deceived by her bitter tricks. After a while, this bitter drama will be staged again, and I feel annoyed.

I came home from vacation, sat on the couch, and pretended to bring it up casually. My mom was thrilled when she heard it. I told her righteously that I didn't want to find a partner yet. I have ideals and ambitions now, and I don't want these emotional things to hinder my progress in my career.

My mother was not happy when she heard this, saying that I was selfish and didn't know how to consider the feelings of the elderly, and said that she was for my good, finding a partner early, and having a child early was good for my future health, saying that she had enough energy now and could help me take care of the child. As soon as I was in a hurry, I said, "Okay, I'll bring a woman back." My mother was immediately quiet, afraid to speak, and looked at me with a puzzled and incredulous look.

She couldn't believe I was a lace, and I thought my mom must have been scared at the time. But I'm not a lace, I'm just trying to scare her, and I'm just saying it in a hurry. My mom paused and said:

Then I won't force you, you can think about what will happen to you in the future, I can tolerate you in everything. "At that time, I felt so moved, mother's love is so great.

Later, my mother and I confessed that I had cheated on her, and she beat me up. But after this incident, she stopped urging me. So if you can't communicate, just scare them.

Everyone longs for a sincere and sincere feeling, and also hopes that two people will enter the palace of marriage on the basis of mutual consent, but if we have not met the right person who is suitable for us, we have reached the time to stabilize and have our own happy family, and it is inevitable to face relatives and friends, especially parents urging marriage, at this time, we must find the right way to deal with it.

If you are a boy, relatively speaking, you are not so anxious, because boys, starting a family may be relatively late, and parents will not worry so much, if they force marriage, I think you can say that you want to focus on your career now, want to make your career bigger and better, and then consider things to stabilize, I think parents should also understand your career. I think you can also plan your future and feel that you need to invest more years in your career before you have time to think about marriage and give your parents a hope.

If you are a girl, you may be in a hurry at home, because the best age for a girl is to get married and have children at the age of 24 to 28, at this time the physical function is the best, and the baby born is also the healthiest, maybe the parents will keep urging you to get married. But no one can say for sure about this kind of thing, if you haven't been able to meet someone you like, don't settle, if you will, you will regret it later. So.

Even after this optimal age, it is better to have less than to overuse. You can discuss it with your parents and say that you hope to really meet someone who is suitable for you and can live a lifetime, and don't let them continue to urge them. If they have been urging you, I think you can just accept some blind dates arranged by them, maybe you will find someone suitable for you in the process.

When we reach marriageable age, there will always be a sentence as parents, that is, do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend? When are you planning to get married? Most of the similar questions will appear in the mouths of parents, they have been emphasizing that let us fall in love, get married, and when we return home after some important festivals, we have to be taken out by relatives to ask questions or ridicule, at this time we have no way at all, so how do we deal with the forced marriage of our family?

There are different levels when the family is forced to marry, the first is that we are still young, and the parents only mention it slightly. The second is that we are already relatively old, and our parents have been asking.

The first situation is that our age is still young, naturally we can use ignorance as an excuse, our excuses are very numerous, and there will be more questions about whether there is a boyfriend or girlfriend, at this time our reason can become, we are not in a hurry anyway, we are still young, I don't know what type of boyfriend I like, if it is decided so quickly, it is not good, I am afraid that people will bully us and we are not sensible, these reasons can become our excuses, As long as parents feel that we are afraid of being deceived, parents also want their children to marry or marry a good family, so naturally they dare not be too hasty.

The second situation is that the age is relatively old, and they are about to become the situation of leftover men and women, of course the parents are anxious, watching the children of the friends they know around them are married one by one, and their children are not yet married, of course, we are anxious, when the parents have been forcing marriage, we can say, parents, you have been urging me to get married, I had a boyfriend or girlfriend who had just been talked about, and I was going to get married and was urged by you, but now I can see his true face clearly, it turns out that he is a **, is taking advantage of your psychology of wanting to get married early, this person plans to ** my family's money, and my parents will not force marriage again after they know that people's hearts are in danger.

If it were me, I might ask them if they want me to be happy or if they just want someone to marry! I take my feelings very seriously!

The solution to being forced to marry by the family is to tell the elders that they are not ready to get married; Highlight your environment and conditions; Refusal on the basis of height or physical appearance; Slippery tracks on the grounds that I'm busy, try not to meet, and use the left ear in and out of the right ear.

1. Tell your elders that you're not ready to get married

If you are unfortunately forced to marry, it may be that the adults in the family are in a hurry, or you haven't been in love for a long time. So at this time, you can clearly tell your parents or adults that you are not ready for this thought, and if you insist on forcing marriage, you can't bear the consequences.

2. Highlight your environment and conditions

If ordinary people force marriage to someone in their family, it should be that the conditions of the family are not bad. Then the family arranges a blind date, at this time you can tell a small lie, just say that your family is very poor, and then your education is very low or something, so that if the other party minds, then the marriage will not be done.

3. Refuse on the grounds of height or appearance

Many people get married, all to see each other. Especially for this kind of forced marriage, you may only meet each other a few times, and you don't know what kind of character and character the other party is. Therefore, the reason is what kind of height you need, or your appearance does not meet your requirements, so that the other party will also know the difficulty and retreat.

4. Try not to meet on the grounds that you are very busy

The reason why many people are forced to marry is that they have not yet married when they reach the age of one year. Therefore, when you are in a foreign country, your family has already given you a blind date, and even forced you to marry. At this time, if you meet once or twice, it is fine, but if you meet many times, it will give others the impression that you agree, so in order not to give people the illusion, you should try not to meet on the grounds that you are busy.

5. Use the left ear in and out of the right ear

Nowadays, this method is very effective for blind dates or forced marriages. You can say yes or something in front of your parents or the Void Lord, and then you can just don't do it in private. In that case, adults can't do anything, because their hands and feet grow on their bodies, so they just need to agree in person and use the method of entering the left ear and exiting the right ear.

Many people come to the Daming Center to solve the problem of forced marriage, so we can see that many people have not found the core point when dealing with this problem, so they write an article to talk about this problem.

I was forced to marry by my family, and I felt troubled and troubled by this, and the root of the problem was completely on my own. If you are entangled in your relationship with your family, so your family will force you to marry. You don't have the means to live your life independently, you have something to rely on, so when you are forced into marriage, you feel very uncomfortable, you have nowhere to run, and you don't know how to deal with it. Remember, the cause of all this problem lies with yourself.

If these problems are not resolved for these reasons, even if the family does not force you to marry, they may "force" you to do other things that you don't want to do in other forms, making you continue to feel uncomfortable, troubled, and involuntarily.

It's an inherent pattern if not changed. In the future, your spouse will "push" you, your children will "push" you, your colleagues and bosses will "push" you, and everyone else will "force" you to do things you don't want to do in various ways. You will be firmly controlled by this pattern, and you will become a slave to it, unless you solve the problem and dissolve the root cause of this pattern.

When the TM Center helps people to resolve the problems that cause them to be troubled by this kind of problem, they should use the TM holistic re-learning method to resolve this model from their own source. Then only then can one truly live independently, one has the ability to calmly make the decisions they want, and one has the ability to say no to others. When you really transform the root of the problem, you are able to tell the other person what you really think with peace and ease, and you don't feel the slightest feeling of being forced.

Even if others are aggressive, you will be able to make your own decisions without being affected at all.

Therefore, don't just look at the surface of the problem of being forced to marry, but also see the root of the problem, and see the pattern that you often feel forced. As long as you solve this model problem, all the forced problems and feelings will be far away from you. If you don't solve this problem, you will live a lifetime with the feeling of being forced by others, a lifetime of feeling of involuntariness, and a lifetime of powerlessness and helplessness.

This pattern is like a virus in your computer, disrupting your normal life. Don't expect to read a book or talk to someone to resolve these patterns, because these habits are deeply ingrained in your deep body consciousness and deeply affect your emotions and feelings, and they can't really be resolved unless they are dealt with in a professional and scientific way.

Therefore, with the help of the problem and trouble of being forced to marry by your family, you can come to the Daming Center to solve the root cause of the problem and improve your own realm. You've been living in other people's thoughts and opinions for too long, and you're too tired. It's time to step out of this pattern, it's time to live your true self.