What are the steps to recovery, what are the specific steps to recovery?

When one party wants to divorce or break up, and the other party is unwilling, there is a dispute between the two parties. Have you ever seen judo? In judo, one side uses the opponent's strength, energy, and weight to their advantage and the other to the disadvantage.

One wants to leave, and the other wants to stay. As long as your intentions are different from each other's, as long as you are still at war, you will never make the other person feel better. At this time, you might as well try judo.

Here are the three principles of emotional judo, or the three strategies:

1. Stop pursuing, criticizing, complaining, and begging each other.

2. No matter what the other party says or does, unconditionally agree. You know, when one party closes their hearts and wants to break up, they deny everything you say. When you argue with them, you are saying that their denial is wrong.

This will only make them lock their hearts even more. Agree with their negations, regardless of what they contain.

Yes, you're right, our relationship is hopeless. ”

yes, don't trust me anymore. You're finally right. ”

Never defend yourself. Blindly agree to the end, but also sound heartfelt, and shut up.

3. Keep a happy mindset about everything.

Be happy. Enjoy your own space. Enjoy the freedom you regained.

Tell each other that they are right, they used to be too let go and took the breakup too seriously. Not only agree with the other person, but also happily follow the other person's opinion. This is the art of judo, and it usually works.

And you can't just use this method for a day, a week, a month, and then go back to the old way and put pressure on the other person. It's going to be undone. You also can't do judo while you're talking and explain to the other person why you're doing it.

You have to be persistent. Don't put pressure on the other person at all.

Of course, this does not mean that you have to cut ties with the other person. If you have already broken up, you can hit ** greetings. Talk politely and lightly.

It's better not to make serious long talks. Serious long conversations hurt feelings most of the time. Small chat, relaxed and friendly.

Try to be brief.

These three principles will quickly reduce the resistance between the two of you. The other party's resistance is aroused by your appeal.

Every time you say "I love you" to them, you are actually saying, "My requirements are different from yours." You ask for a breakup, I ask for intimacy. I don't care what you ask for. It's my requests that matter. ”

When a man says to his wife, "I have changed." I changed it.

Let's reconcile. I've been reborn. In fact, for the wife, every time a man says to her, "I've changed," he's still the same.

The woman will subconsciously say, "He still can't change the dog to eat." He's still so neurotic, selfish, and coercive.

As long as he is still so virtuous, I will never look back. ”

Recovering a relationship requires depressurizing the relationship.

There are two types of divorce that occur almost simultaneously, one is a legal divorce and the other is an emotional divorce. We are often confused by these two types of divorce. Some people think that blocking a legal divorce is equivalent to blocking an emotional divorce.

In fact, the harder you block the former, the farther the other person wants to escape. The more pressure you exert, the more the other person will not see your inner charm.

Everyone, including marriage experts, believes that marriage should be maintained with heart. But I would say that the more you try to maintain it, the more you can't maintain it. When you reason with someone and tell them how much you love them, you want to change them.

Stop doing these useless things and admit and accept them 100 percent. Whatever your one thinks or does, accept it all unconditionally.

Then sit back and change themselves.

Their opposing emotions will quickly disappear because they require the existence of opposites. When you genuinely agree with the other person, when you lovingly agree with the other person's heart, their antagonism loses its foundation. You have raised the white flag.

You've put down your gun. This forces them to do the same. They can't shoot at you when you don't have a gun in your hand.

When you give up defending yourself, they will come to defend you.

These practices are contrary to normal sense, because our emotions are like spoiled children. Emotions have to choose not only the goal, but also the method. It chose to go to London, and then it chose to ride a horse. You can't ride to London. You have to let your sanity choose something.

Your emotion says, "I love that person and I want him or her back." ”

Okay", says your reason, "but you have to stop criticizing the other person and agree wholeheartedly to everything the other person asks." ”

But I'm afraid that if I do this, I'll lose him or her even more. "Emotions still want to decide everything, but this time, it has to lose.

Bringing him or her back is only a priority, not a necessity, among countless choices. The more you take the other person seriously, the less you can get him or her. If the other party is just a priority, you have power.

Put the emotional things aside. In this race, you'll have to build a strong line of defense.

People usually believe in the myth that "if I don't let him (her) know that I need him (her), he (she) will think that I don't love him (her)." ”

So, what if he or she knows, does it work? It works for your size! Stop doing what doesn't work, do something that still has a silver lining.

The first big step:

The recovery period, the recovery period is the situation of just breaking up, in the case of falling out of love, it is a bit like a broken glass heartbreak, sadness, and loss of focus in life.

At this time, it is very important to find ourselves, because if we want to successfully recover, we must show a more confident and better version of ourselves when we re-contact our ex in the future, and he will regret his decision, if you re-contact him, he says that you become worse like this, he will believe in himself more, and it was right to break up with you in the first place, so now you must make yourself better.

So the first one, you must let yourself forget about your ex for a while, so I suggest that one of the things you do right away is to wrap up all the things about your ex in your room, and then bury them in your backyard like this, and you don't burn them or whatever, maybe one day you will have no aftertaste. Instead of burning it, you have to put it in a place that is hard to obtain, making it difficult for yourself to get within easy reach, so that is a simple isolation.

You won't be constantly seeing your ex's stuff and then he will appear in your dreams like a ghost, but some people will say that there are too many common memories of living in a place where I lived, because after I broke up before, you would think of the story between you when you saw the ceiling dug in the room.

If it's so annoying, I suggest that you can go outside to rent a suite for a short period of time, live outside for a month or two, change the environment, let yourself calm and settle quickly, it will help, otherwise your home may have a bunch of things, you see these things, you will recall the time when the two people were together, this is not the way, so this is the first step.

Another big point:

It's that you have to get to know people more, because at that time we just broke up, when we fell out of love, we would be very unconfident in ourselves, and we would also feel that we were not a loser in life, no one likes us like this, that is, when we are too lost, we will think wildly, crankily, think about something too negative, so by going out with other people's families, and even going out with other members of the opposite sex, I think I will make myself much better.

You will feel that in fact, I have such an attraction, and I will also attract other people of the opposite sex, and if you fall out of love, you may only think about your ex, but let you go out with other members of the opposite sex, I think it will be better, and at this time you can go out more for your relatives and friends.

I believe that those friends who are really good with you, friends who really care about you, are willing to listen to you talk about sex, sometimes people just need a little way to vent, but you can't say those things to your girlfriend every day, it's okay to talk occasionally.

1.Take the initiative.

First of all, we can ask ourselves, do we really love each other? Are you very determined to be with each other? Since you care, then choose to take the initiative.

The process of recovering love can be quite painful, but what's wrong with letting go of some of your body compared to the sweetness you get in the end?

2.Empathy.

Secondly, the interaction of love is a process of mutual understanding, and gradually through contact and integration, tacit understanding is obtained. Only by clarifying the psychology of the other party and exploring what the other party thinks, thinks, and needs, can we better improve our own practices, so as to achieve twice the result with half the effort.

3.Look at yourself.

Finally, it is known that a person can develop a good habit over a period of time. We can start by looking at what we are lacking in, or what habits are uncomfortable with the other person, and then we can use a period of time to develop a habit. Remodeling can not only promote love, but also have better capital for itself.

Here comes the best redemption step, let's see how to do it.

The motive for redeeming your ex should be "I'm worth it" for you to stay!

How many steps are there to recovery? Six steps to redemption (a must-see for women).

Three tips to help you get your ex back.

No one can be mistaken about this.

How many steps are there to recovery? Six steps to redemption (a must-see for women).

Here comes the best redemption step, let's see how to do it.

How exactly do you get your emotions back, and what are the steps to do so?

Reversing an explosive breakup? Redemption steps?

What you have to do is to cover up the disadvantages, not to humbly beg him to get back together with you, let alone to try to move the other party, but to use your high profile to re-attract him, so that he can in turn redeem your grandson

The correct way for the Horuma faction to win back the other party is to guess what kind of You Fiber He is? This has to be learned.

Is there any way to save the sedan chair? Answer: Liquid, save the three parties and the law.

Is it true to break up? Is the defeat correct?

.92% of breakups are irretrievable92% of breakups are irretrievable, but it is difficult for many people to deal with the breakup correctly and rationally in the confusion and pain of the breakup, and often use stalking, gambling and cold war, insisting on pleasing and offering courtesy, finding friends and parents to persuade them, and even directly looking at fate and other wrong ways, resulting in worse and worse situations!

.What the hell does he think, why is he so ruthless?

Breaking up is definitely not the path they want to choose, but the path they have to choose when they are too tired and have no confidence to choose, but you wait until you break up to give the other party a promise or guarantee, which is not convincing, and they have lost confidence in their past relationships. After all, mistakes are not made once or twice, maybe the other party has accumulated disappointment again and again in the various wrong ways of getting along with you, and then chooses to leave. In fact, love is not subtraction, as long as the way is right, you can turn love back into addition.

Therefore, using a way that is acceptable to the other party to make the other party feel your change is the key to recovery.

Gradually change yourself and let the other party see your sincerity, this is the key to redemption!

What you have to do is not humbly begging him to get back together with you, let alone trying to move the other party, but to use your high profile to re-attract him and let him redeem you in turn

What are the ways to redeem it? There are three ways to redeem it.