What are the common ways for parents to spoil their children?

If a habitual son kills a child, then what is "habit"? These are more typical forms of pampering children, parents take a closer look and self-examination, have they committed these doting disorders?

1.Protect in person

In Xiao Li's family, the biggest problem with managing children is that there are too many voices. If the mother is in charge of the child, the father will say, "It's not like this, he's still young."

When the father takes care of the child, the grandmother will stand up and protect: "You were more muddy than this back then, aren't you good now?" He will naturally be fine when he grows up.

Whenever a child makes a mistake, he can always find a "refuge" before criticism comes, Xiao Li is particularly worried, it will be difficult for the child to form a correct view of right and wrong, and he will really not be able to control it in the future.

2.Arranged instead

I once saw a "giant baby" on TV, a teenager child, who needs to be fed when he eats at home, and his mother helps him to get dressed, and he even has to be replaced by someone to tie his shoes. Some mothers think that asking their children to do things now is completely asking for trouble, one is too late to hurt the child, how can they bear to let the child move, and the other is that instead of letting the child work hard, it is better to help him do it themselves. But if you continue to do it like this, you will inevitably lose a hard-working and motivated child, which is never a good thing.

3.Special treatment

Delicious food must be enjoyed by the child first, other people's birthdays can be but, children must buy a big cake for their birthday, everyone must prepare gifts ......This will only make the child selfish and not caring about others.

4.Fuss

When the child reaches the age of being able to walk and run, it is normal for him to bump and bump, but when the child touches the table, he hits the table and says, "Who told you to touch our baby!" "Originally, the child could get up quietly and continue to play by himself after falling, but you had to step on the ground a few times to vent the child's anger, which would only turn the child into a person who loved to shirk responsibility.

5.Fear of crying

When the child sees what he wants, you don't want to buy it for him, but when the child cries, there is no principle, and it doesn't matter if it's junk food or not, buy it to him without saying a word, when the child doesn't go well and threaten you with crying, you have to accommodate the doting child, such parents are incompetent parents, and will only sow the seeds of willfulness and lack of self-control in the child's character.

The first is excessive protection of children, when their children make mistakes are not to take criticism, or to come forward to protect, for a long time when children make mistakes will always find a refuge, resulting in the formation of an incorrect three views of the child, the second excessive care of their children, sometimes children in the usual play will always bump into it, to let their children learn to fall down and get up on their own, if parents are too concerned, will only turn the child into a person who loves to shirk responsibility.

The child will try his best to meet any requirements, and the child will not educate if he does something wrong, often praise his own child, etc., such behavior is very bad, he not only can not bring benefits to the child, but also harm the child's life.

<> "Parents' self-examination: habitual children are like killing children, 7 major doting children's behaviors.

1 Special treatment, all children are given special treatment, and the status of the family is the highest.

Children are prone to a sense of self-superiority."

Tends to become selfish and doesn't care about others.

thinks that Fu Kai's orders are all taken for granted.

What you get doesn't need to be given back.

2 Favoritism, no matter whether the child is right or wrong, always unconditionally favors the child.

Children tend to have a temper tantrum.

Regardless of the feelings of others, he is willful.

become what others see"Bear child

Parents at home.

Children are more likely to suffer when they go out unprotected.

3. Lack of habits, no code of conduct for children, and no rules for children.

Children are easy to become.

Lack of hygiene, procrastination.

Children who do not have a good habit.

No self-discipline.

Lack of growth and progress.

4. Compromise everywhere and reward your child at all times.

On the surface, the child is cooperative.

In fact, the child loses the initiative.

Only learned to bargain.

Whatever the child does, you have to negotiate terms with you.

5 Excessive attention, everyone is child-centered and pays attention to children every day.

The child's personality is easily influenced.

Take the self as the center of distraction.

Think of yourself as the most important thing.

No one can compare.

6. Indulge the child, no matter how unreasonable the child is, the parent unconditionally accommodates and condones it.

It is easy to affect the child's lifelong stare at the pure child.

The child will only be more and more demanding.

If you don't reach it, you will be satisfied in various ways.

leading to extreme consequences.

7. Overprotective, parents are worried that their children are in danger of injury, and do not let their children try any difficulties.

Children are easily dependent on their parents.

Lack of self-confidence and socialization.

Only live in your own world.

Finally become"Giant Baby".

1. Big package.

In order to improve work efficiency, some parents often do everything for their children, such as putting on shoes, dressing, cleaning, and even when the child is very big, the parents still feed around one bite at a time, and the news will always see college students sending dirty clothes home for their mothers to wash. Arranged substitution will only make the child lose the standard of living that he should have, and there is no concept of living alone, everything depends on his parents, once he enters the society, the child will become the one who has no opinion.

2. Reach casually.

Give me what my child needs. Some parents return a lot of pocket money to children and elementary school children, and the child's arrival is even more casual. Such children must develop a bad disposition that does not know how to cherish things, pay attention to material life, waste money, and are inconsiderate of others, and have little spirit of enduring and enduring hardships.

3. Bargaining. Sometimes in order to let the child do something, the child often needs the parents to achieve the wish before it can be implemented, so that the habit will only make the child feel that the work can be conditional, often saying "let me do it, but you have to agree...""This kind of child does not know how to be responsible, does things according to mood, and lacks initiative.

4. Cover up in public.

Sometimes the father controls the child, and the mother protects him: "You don't have to be very strict, he is young." "Some parents teach their children, and grandma will stand up and speak:

You can't be in a hurry, he will naturally be good when he is older; When you were young, you were far from being as good as him! This kind of child is naturally "unteachable"! Because she has no concept of right and wrong, and there are always "underworld forces" and "shelters", the result is not only a distorted temperament of the child, but sometimes it will lead to disharmony in the family.

5. Life is lazy.

Some parents may feel that their children usually study hard, and they will indulge their children to watch TV dramas and sleep in the morning until the afternoon when they are on vacation or rest, and the weekday work and rest time will be completely interrupted.

The following behaviors will ruin the child's life, the first is excessive spoiling, many families are spoiled to the child, when the emperor is the same, good food and drink can not be broken, everything is child-centered. As everyone knows, the more this happens, the more it will encourage the child's selfishness and willfulness, and feel that everyone should be good to him, so as to develop a selfish and indifferent character. The second is favoritism and maintenance, every time a father educates a child, the mother or grandparents are always soft-hearted, thinking that the child is still young and does not need to be so strict, and makes excuses for his mistakes, and over time, a bear child is raised.

The third is unlimited satisfaction, if you unconditionally meet any of your children's requirements, your children will develop the habit of spending money like water, and they will not understand the hard work of their parents to make money.

Doing everything will only make children lose the opportunity to exercise their ability to act, and they will not have the awareness of independent living and self-care. Entering the society is bound to be frustrated and fall behind others. Weak execution makes it difficult for children to gain self-confidence and the joy of success.

For example, when a child does something wrong, not only does he not stop it, but he also blames the other person in turn. When a child is rude, parents never correct it.

Personally, I think that just like managing anything, it is necessary to let children know that the bottom line and boundaries of some things cannot be crossed, such as safety, morality, etc.; On the other hand, it is necessary to develop as many aspects as possible that children transcend boundaries, such as the understanding of technology and the universe. Educating children is the most complex project of all mankind. One of the things that I think is important in my process of educating two children is not to worry about winning or losing.

Sometimes it's a competitive mentality that makes you lose your judgment, which leads to conflicts with your children. Almost all of a child's rebellion comes from needing the love of parents, so parents should understand their children from their children's perspective and give them more love. So how to avoid this phenomenon, there are the following methods:

1.When you were a child, you can't just get used to him, let him know that there are principles in many things. And to abide by these principles.

2.Help your child do things in a certain way and give him room for self-development. In this way, he can get rid of dependence and gradually improve.

4.Be patient and teach when encountering problems, reason with children, and let them realize that they should be reasonable in doing things from an early age. Don't instill that I'm a parent, you have to listen to me.

5.Don't let them be too headstrong, and do things with consideration for other people's feelings.

First of all, set the rules! It is very important for him to know what he can and cannot do, how to do it, what not to do, what is wrong and what is right. There are no rules, there are no squares!

Sometimes a child doesn't want to upset an adult, but he doesn't know it's wrong! But if you set the rules and do it wrong, you know you can't do it, then punishment is necessary! There must be punishment regulations in the rules, small things are punished, and general things are punished for not being able to watch TV for a day.

No matter how serious it is, you can't watch snack TV, and do housework! Be sure to play by the rules! You can't just cry and it's over!

I think I'll cry when something happens!

First of all, parents should not protect their children all the time, and secondly, they should not blindly indulge their children.

Everyone should be strict with children's education when they should be strict, so that they can avoid wrong education methods, and they will not always be used to children, and they will not be killed by children.

If you want to avoid facing your child's mistakes, parents should not always tolerate their mistakes, let alone spoil him, and let him do things independently.

Usually you should cultivate your child's independence, and don't spoil your child often, let your child learn to do some things, and know how to let your child cultivate herself.

<> "Habitual Sons, Like Killing Children, Top Ten Dote on Children."

1.Give your child special treatment.

Children have a superior status at home and receive special care everywhere, such as eating "alone", etc., and in the long run, the child will become selfish and unsympathetic.

2.When a child makes a mistake, he will protect him in front of him.

Many parents use "don't be too strict, they are still young" as the reason to protect their children's mistakes, which will make the child have no concept of right and wrong, resulting in a distorted personality of the child.

3.Pay too much attention to nuclei.

The family cares about the child all the time, which makes the family think that they are the center and the family has to surround them.

ta turn. 4. Easily meet unjustified requests.

Parents will give children what they want, so that they will develop a character that does not know how to cherish, pays attention to material enjoyment and is inconsiderate of others.

5 .Children are allowed to live lazy lives.

Children are allowed to be picky eaters, sleep lazy, play without moderation, etc., so that they are prone to lack self-motivation and perseverance, and get by.

6.Ask your child.

For example, while coaxing and begging the child to eat, promise him to tell 3 stories and then finish the meal. The more you beg, the more your child will behave in a twisted manner, not only will you not know what is right from wrong, but your parents' prestige will also be exhausted.

7.Substitution as an arrangement.

Some parents never ask their children to work, they have to feed them at the age of three or four, and they don't do any housework at the age of five or six. In this way, the child will not become industrious, kind, and self-motivated.

8.Fuss

When a child is sick, parents panic and spoil themselves, which will eventually lead to the child not letting the parents leave and become cowardly and timid.

9.Stripping away independence.

If you put it in your mouth for fear of melting, you will be afraid of flying away if you spit it out. Such children will develop a dependency mentality, often become a "door tiger", run rampant at home, and be timid as a mouse outside, forming a character defect.

10.Fear of crying

Parents who are afraid of their children's crying are incompetent parents, and if they allow their children to beat and scold their parents, they will sow the seeds of selfishness, ruthlessness, and willfulness in their personality.