What does my boyfriend mean by letting my parents look for them?

It shows that your boyfriend still values you. Marriage is not a matter of two people, but of two families. Tell your parents before you meet them and be prepared.

He wants to get his parents to accept you first, and then he wants to ask your parents to entrust you to him. A man who knows how to respect his parents and knows how to love his girlfriend is very good.

Hello, subject

First of all, I looked it up on the Internet: 設色 is a Chinese word, pronounced as wù sè. Verbs, nowadays, mostly refer to the search for talents or things that are needed (mostly found in ancient texts).

Specific explanation: 1. The coat color of the animal used for sacrifice in ancient times. 2. Refers to morphology.

3. Refers to various colored items. 4. Refers to the scenery; Scenery. 5. The coat color of the livestock.

6. Visit according to certain standards. 7. See; See. 8. All kinds of items.

From the second volume of "Xijing Miscellaneous Records": "Emperor Gao was both Xinfeng, and moved the old society, Quxiang Dongyu, looking for the old. ”

Secondly, my understanding is related to: matter is matter and matter (through "enlightenment") sex, color, have you ever heard the term "colored eyes"? Color is the external appearance of the object we see, and in the eyes of most people, colorful and colorful colors are always more "confusing" than simple and single colors, right?

Then, the so-called "searching" is to only see the color of the outside of things, which is almost similar to "seeing is believing"+ For example, you are dressed very shabby, but others don't know that you are actually rich, but you want to relive your old life and wear your old clothes, and then others see it and say, "Look at that person's poor and sour appearance".

In short, it is material and the "parents" are more than just looking. (That is, what is more "advanced" and "high" than material is the search).

Finally, I hope you don't dislike me for typing too much, I am not talented, my expression cannot be concise, and I hope that Haihan

What he meant by this was to ask his parents to look for it.

If your dad is a very proactive type, you say, "Whatever", if you're more passive, you say: okay.

If you are a girl, you will be given a suggestion, go on a blind date, and kiss each other; Don't let the man's sweet words easily deceive, and defend your lowest bottom line. Blind dates are full of routines.

You just say you can just do it.

It's nothing, I'll tell my dad, if you like someone's family, I'll go back and see you.

What the parents are looking for is what the mother-in-law likes.

Then yours is very good!

What age! Why do you forcibly dispose of the object if you don't get married and start a family? Does it make people get married with a big belly and be a yellow-faced woman?

Just go with the flow, and it doesn't matter if you see, what if you fall in love?

Because in the eyes of parents, appearance is not the first thing. They think more about whether their jobs are stable and what their family conditions are, so they don't pay much attention to their appearance, resulting in the appearance of the blind dates introduced by their parents being very ordinary.

The main reason is that the vision of parents is completely different from that of young people, they feel that people without good looks are more reliable, and such people are more family-oriented, so the objects that parents are looking for are like this.

Because what they value more is whether the subject's family background is rich or not, what kind of job they have, where they work, etc.

Most parents are looking for blind dates with average appearance, relatively high appearance, and generally have objects, or have their own ideas.

In fact, this problem is still very easy to parse. Because when parents start looking for blind dates for us, they are already very worried that we don't have any more to ask for. It is better to choose a person who can live than to let your children be a lonely old man, so appearance is no longer important to them.

In fact, parents don't deliberately choose ugly blind dates for us, but they pay more attention to other aspects of each other when choosing. The older people are, the less they value their appearance, because for them, their faces will grow old sooner or later. And when you are old, you are all alone, and your appearance cannot be eaten, so you won't pay too much attention to your appearance when choosing a candidate.

Sometimes we even ignore appearance, so we have the illusion that "parents give us blind dates are ugly".

In fact, as long as you are careful, you can find that in fact, parents do not know much about their children's blind dates, and they often know each other through the introduction of others. But when it comes to introductions, it's usually exaggerated, so what the truth is can only be known when we go on a blind date to really get in touch.

Personally, I think that when a person needs to go on a blind date, it is really not the time to look at the face at will。Because good-looking people have long been pursued by others, do you still need to go on a blind date? And the ultimate goal of the blind date is to hope that the two can get married and live together, so character is the most important thing.

Sometimes appearance is very important, but there is no blind date that really values personal quality, as well as family conditions.

Because parents pay more attention to the inside than we do, and don't pay attention to the outside.

Research has indeed shown that conflicts between parents and children over mate preferences tend to arise over physical appearance and family background. Children pay more attention to each other's excellent genetic traits (mainly appearance characteristics) and happy personality traits, while parents pay more attention to whether the other party has "good qualities" and "good resources", and whether the other party can be a good parent and spouse, as well as the consistency of nationality and political background. To a certain extent, the perspective that parents consider is actually their inevitable reason.

Let's analyze the parents' thinking:

On the one hand, the resource advantages of the children's future partners, including a good family background and the same religious beliefs, can ensure that they can take on their own family responsibilities in a good family atmosphere.

On the other hand, the evolutionary trade-off view holds that young people prefer individuals with genetic advantages, but that such people are more likely to enjoy finding a mate than raising children.

That is to say, in the eyes of parents, the object that their children are looking for is indeed handsome and beautiful, but they are also likely to prefer to mess with flowers and grass rather than take care of children. If you don't use it, how can you do it?

The results of the research of psychologists Roth and Peck also found that the level of social class of the couple itself is positively correlated with the degree of marriage matching, and the higher the social class, the higher the degree of marriage matching.

Another empirical study on the influencing factors of family happiness showed that the degree of family happiness in the highly educated group (college or bachelor's degree or above) was twice as high as that of the low-educated group (illiterate or in primary school).

Some scholars have pointed out that the greater the income difference, the lower the quality of marriage, and the difference in spouse income has a greater negative effect on communication and role equality.

You see, it is reasonable for parents to value the "good resources" of their children's spouses and ignore the appearance.

When many young men and women reach the marriageable age, the most common thing they encounter is the various blind dates that their parents have. The reason why most people resist blind dates is not only because they are forced to find a partner, but also because most of the blind dates found by their parents are unsatisfactory. In addition to appearance, the goal chosen by parents is more to consider other objective social factors such as family affairs, morality, and work.

The blind date partners chosen by parents are generally required to have a good personality, be honest and motivated, and do not seek to be rich and noble, but only to be able to live a stable life. Under such conditions, when screening, parents are more inclined to those who are mediocre in appearance, but who are more calm. In addition,Many parents will have a sense that their children do not have particularly outstanding advantages, and when they see that they have gradually become older single young people, they will automatically lower their children's mate selection conditions in their hearts, and take the initiative to choose some blind dates that are easy to succeed and look more ordinary.

Secondly, in the subjective impression of many elders, people with ordinary looks give people a more down-to-earth and reliable feeling. For the same conditions, young people who are too handsome will leave a bad impression on their elders. They will subconsciously feel that the other party's politeness, morality, private life, career, etc. have some defects, otherwise how could they not have found a suitable partner until now.

These biases can only be corrected through future contact. And those who look mediocre will expose their flaws as soon as they come up, and the advantages of work and other aspects are more reassuring.

Blind dates are not to find a partner for their parents, but to find someone for themselves who can be with them for a lifetime. We can't let our parents all look for them according to their standards, and we can't blindly covet handsome appearances. Both parties must discuss and communicate more, and determine a selection standard that both parties will be satisfied with, so that it can be regarded as a perfect blind date.

Parents choose blind dates for their children, generally consider whether the other party is honest first, can live well with their children, the view of Xiao Xianrou is instinctive, they are all children, how can they take care of others, so naturally filter out this kind of people, and then most of the blind dates are older, so as parents, they will not take Xiao Xianrou as the first choice, and as modern women, most of them are visual animals, and most mature men will feel more old-fashioned, Then it will naturally be rejected, which is why most blind dates are failures, the first impression is not good, and how to continue later.

After all, there is a generation gap, the aesthetics of the two generations are different, just like the clothes that our mother bought for us think are particularly ugly, you think it is incomprehensible, but this is the truth, their views are different from ours.

Parents' opinions do not represent yours. Your opinion is your own. You should decide for yourself that marriage is your own big thing.

Without the need for a parental decision. You don't want to be a mom boy for your parents. It should be up to you to decide what kind of opposite sex you like.

If you're a girl. You should find an honest, honest and hard-working boy as a partner.

The parents will consider more, such as education, family background, age, etc., and if you weigh it, your appearance may be a little worse, and there may be exceptions, not so absolutely.

It doesn't have to be ugly, it's just that it's possible that you're going to be ugly, or that doesn't fit your aesthetic.

Because there is a Shih Tzu in the eyes of a lover, you haven't met your Shih Tzu yet.

It may be that your aesthetic is quite different from that of your parents.

As the saying goes, an ugly wife is close to the treasure of the family.

1. Everyone's visual perspective is different

In fact, this is also very normal, everyone's perspective and mentality of looking at another person are completely different, we see ourselves and our parents see ourselves as the same, and we and our parents look at a person's quality is also completely different.

As parents, their understanding of the blind date is also based on the introducer, the introducer's impression and perception of the other party is the same, and the introducer's understanding and perception are the same in the process of introducing the other party to the parents.

Second, the beautification of the introducer

The introducer must have some beautification of the other party's conditions and external image, so that when you hear the introduction, you will have the urge to think about the other party, and the introducer and the other party must have been modified when they say ourselves.

Otherwise, will the introducer say that he is old, poor, and does not like to take a bath?

Third, the problem of mentality

In fact, we also have a reason ourselves, because we see that the other party is based on the blind date This scene, everyone actually has a certain degree of resistance to the blind date, and there is a negative emotion for the blind date.

When people are angry, they really look at everyone who is ugly, and they feel ugly to the sky when they see themselves.

Fourth, maybe you are the one who is disliked

There is also a possibility that the blind date object, in fact, did not fancy you, in the case of not taking a fancy to you, to prevent being favored by you, may deliberately behave poorly, such as not being a gentleman enough, not paying after eating, and so on, some of the actions that make you look at him and greatly discount him, maybe he did it on purpose, the purpose is to get rid of this inexplicable blind date quickly.

Parents are looking for objects that they like, and they want you to marry the ones they like, and the introducer is looking for something different according to your conditions and preferences, so it is better to find a partner who you like.

Most of the objects of introduction are sold by Lao Wang, exaggerating the advantages and concealing the shortcomings, in order to promote success.

Because parents and children think differently! Parents live in their time because of their age, and the way of thinking of young people is different from where they are now! They look at people with their eyes, and young people pursue sunshine and handsomeness! Adults should be hard-working and self-motivated.

Parents pay attention to the comprehensive conditions in all aspects, and what others introduce may suit your own taste, but living is firewood, rice, oil and salt, or affordable!