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When you are angry, take a deep breath and think about why your child is doing this, and then communicate with your child.
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When you do your chores and tidy up your home, you want to take a break. The child will deny your work with a single touch. You're going to work again.
He's not your boss, he's not going to break like a computer, and with past experience, this can be defined as disobedience, and everyone will hit the kids. So. There was an outlet for the venting of emotions, and it was beckoned.
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When I was a child, my parents "taught by word and deed", and when I had a child. This "ancestral legacy" is naturally "gifted" to the next generation. The reason for this is that this is one of the ways in which parents themselves experience the most with their children.
It's much simpler than creating your own model of not hitting your child.
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As far as my experience goes, there are very few beatings and scolding at home, so when my parents raise their voices, I know that they have made a big mistake. This is the effect of the word "contrast". In contrast, some people beat every day, and they beat the little things that make the child's skin thicker, which is simply a judgment.
I made a more serious mistake, and my parents just ignored me with a straight face, and that was already something that could be remembered for a lifetime.
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For example, "greeting people" is a very simple "rule". I've seen parents who pay great attention to this, and they must say hello when they come to the house, and don't want to leave if their children don't say hello. I've also seen parents who execute it very casually, and sometimes the child turns around and leaves, just laughing and laughing.
In the latter case, the child's understanding of the "rules" will of course be more confused. In case you encounter a bad-tempered parent again, you will turn a blind eye to a mistake made today, and beat it up violently tomorrow. It is self-evident what the results of such education will be.
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Respect your child and don't force your child to do something they don't want to do.
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In fact, we should really work harder, and there is no need to hit the child all the time.
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1. Can parents beat and scold their children at will?
1. Parents are not allowed to beat and scold their children at will. It is illegal for parents to beat and scold their children at will. Hitting and scolding a child may constitute a criminal offense if the circumstances are serious, such as constituting the crime of abuse, etc., and you will bear legal responsibility.
Parents have the obligation to raise and educate their children, and children have the obligation to support and support their parents.
2. Legal basis: Article 3 of the Anti-Domestic Violence Law of the People's Republic of China.
Family members shall help each other, care for each other, live in harmony, and fulfill family obligations.
Combating domestic violence is the shared responsibility of the State, society and every family.
The State prohibits any form of domestic violence.
Article 16. Where the circumstances of domestic violence are relatively minor, and public security administrative sanctions are not given in accordance with law, the public security organs are to criticize and educate the perpetrator or issue a written warning.
The written warning shall include content such as the perpetrator's identity information, a statement of the facts of domestic violence, and a prohibition on the perpetrator from committing domestic violence.
2. What to do if a minor suffers from domestic violence.
Victims of domestic violence, their legally-designated persons, and close relatives may make complaints, feedback, or seek assistance from the perpetrator's or victim's unit, residents' committees, villagers' committees, women's federations, and other such units. After relevant units receive complaints, feedback, or requests for assistance or assistance from domestic violence, they shall provide assistance and handle it.
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One. It exacerbates the generation of bad behavior.
When juvenile offenders were asked "how their families treat you?" more than 50 percent of them chose to beat and scold them regularly. Relevant analysis shows that the proportion of children who are often beaten and scolded by their families is much higher than that of children who do not choose to be "often beaten and scolded".
Two. Exacerbates parent-child conflict.
The direct consequence of parents beating and scolding their children is not only to cause the minor children to suffer physical pain, but more seriously, to cause their hearts to be hurt, to their parents to reject them, and to become the direct cause of the child's rebellion and running away from home.
Three. Children who grow up in domestic violence are very prone to bad personality traits. In the survey, the bad behavior characteristics of children who are often subjected to violence at home are the most obvious, and irritable personality is the internal motivation of juvenile delinquency, and parental beating and scolding is an important source of juvenile bad character.
4.Parental violence becomes a model for the child's aggression.
Children have a strong ability to learn to imitate, and family members, especially parents, are the earliest objects of imitation in young children. Children grow up in a family atmosphere of domestic violence for a long time, and their personality will also be subtly influenced by their parents and become a violent person.
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Clearly express your strong disagreement, state your expectations and give him a clear choice, tell him how to make up for his mistakes, and let him know the consequences of his mistakes.
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The solution is very simple, assume that he is not a minor or your child, but a peer or even your superior who you meet in the course of your work. It is impossible for people to maintain no disagreements with their colleagues at work all the time, will you use beating and scolding to solve your colleagues?
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Tell yourself that the child is your own, and scolding can't solve the problem, you should first protect the child's face, and take turns to calm his emotions, and then understand the specific problem of lead, and finally praise, punish, and give suggestions for correction.
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Learn to reason with your child.
If you want to do not scold the child when educating the child, the first thing you need to do at this time is to learn to reason with the child, parents must not think that the child is small, do not understand the reason, in fact, about a child about one year old, as long as the words are not obscure when reasoning, the truth is simple and easy to understand, most children can understand, some small things through reasoning, you can completely let the child no longer make mistakes, no need to beat and scold the child.
Understand that hitting and scolding your child will not let your child know right from wrong.
If you want to educate your child without scolding your child, at this time parents must understand that scolding your child will not let your child know right and wrong, after beating your child, the child will not make mistakes because she is afraid of you, but the child will always grow up, there will always be a day when you are not afraid of you, let alone beating the child, you may not have the strength to beat the child, when you make a mistake, instead of scolding the child, it is better to tell the child directly about the mistake, and then teach the child some ways to correct the mistake.
There is no such thing as a child who does not make mistakes.
If you want to educate your child without beating and scolding your child, at this time parents must understand that there is no child who does not make mistakes in the world, if a child does everything according to the parents' implementation, and there is never anything wrong, if an adult is like this, the people around him will feel very terrible, such a situation on a child, it doesn't feel like a child.
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Punishment and education should be combined, and if there is only education without punishment, then there are likely to be various deviations in the process of education. But if there is only punishment and no education, then everyone does not know what they have done wrong. Therefore, punishment and education must be combined, only in this way can children grow better.
Elders must pay attention when educating children, don't get angry with children casually, but let children know what they are doing wrong.
Know what's wrong.
Some children know that they are wrong, but they don't know why they are wrong, because when their parents find out that they are wrong, they get angry with themselves and don't mention anything else at all. In fact, there is a big deviation in this kind of education, and this kind of education will only make children have a certain psychological shadow on this matter, and they don't know what they are doing wrong. Therefore, when educating children, we must first let them know what is right and what is wrong.
Take responsibility for your own mistakes.
If a child is doing something wrong, then as an educator, you can tell the child what went wrong and what should not be done, and then let the child know how outrageous his mistake is. Wait for the child to know that he has done something wrong before giving the child the corresponding punishment, in this case, the child is more willing to accept this punishment, and will keep this punishment in his heart, and will never make similar mistakes in the future.
If it is only education, just let the child know that he has done something wrong without any punishment, then the child will not be impressed by this mistake. Because at this time, the child only knows that he has done wrong, but he does not recognize any consequences. In such a situation, the child will not be impressed by this mistake, so it is possible to make it again in the future.
Therefore, it is necessary to let the child know that he has done wrong, and then bring some punishment to the child, only in this way can the child completely change such a mistake.
Similar to my children, I also have such times, I feel distressed if I fight, and I am so angry that I don't fight. However, we might as well think about it this way, who has not had a childhood, who has not had a disobedient time, that is when children love us. Next time, before you want to do it, count to ten, and then take a deep breath. >>>More
Depending on the situation, you can tell them yourself first, be reasonable, if it doesn't work, you can ask your relatives as soon as possible, and if you can't do it, just ask the police uncle to help.
In fact, many people have gone through the so-called rebellious period, when they especially do not understand their parents. Even after we grow up, we face the pressure of life, and then we will sprinkle some troublesome things on our parents, and when we can't take care of our emotions, we will hurt the people who love us the most. We need to take into account the feelings of our parents, in fact, we need to consider the problem from the perspective of our parents, and then understand them more. >>>More
Children must be moderate when learning, to combine work and rest, because children are more playful by nature, you have to complete a certain amount of learning within the specified time, but children complete a certain amount of learning, let children play as much as they want when playing, don't worry about learning. <>
Always tell your child that he is learning for himself, and that it has nothing to do with you whether he is learning well or not, and don't take your child's learning too seriously, because the more you value his learning, the more he feels that he is learning for you.