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As social beings, the relationship between individuals is very complex and delicate. How to look at the relationship between people directly reflects a person's insight and wisdom.
In life, we must reflect our value as a "person" through labor contributions. How to view the relationship between this kind of labor contribution is also the embodiment of a person's insight and wisdom.
If you have a narrow prejudice against someone who uses themselves as a tool, you may hate him for bullying others.
If you are an enterprising person, you will also be grateful for his kindness, and you will work more diligently to realize your maximum value.
It can be said that a person's value is largely realized by his own labor contribution. As a member of society, how to view the relationship in labor contribution is an important criterion to measure whether a person is mature or not.
The world is full of knowledge, and the practice of human feelings is the article. "The ancients said that "there is Bole in the world, and then there is a thousand miles of horses", if it is really a thousand miles of horse, you will be grateful to Bole.
Of course, as a mature social individual, being able to reasonably and legally protect one's own rights and interests, and bravely refusing and resisting those who manipulate power is also an important contribution to social civilization.
Each has its own rhetoric that is difficult to comprehend, and it is the sin of the poor. Sometimes I suffer from old sins for money, and I speak up when I think of poverty.
What years are they now, and who is backward in thought. Those who are capable are big and do not lose, and those who are weak are shrewd and do not suffer.
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In the inherent impression of many people, as long as they can enter a public institution to find a job, whether it is social status or work content, they can be superior, and they do not have to worry about work for a lifetime, so many college students are full of yearning for public institutions, and even some students have begun to brush up on civil service examination questions before graduation. But is that really the case? According to many graduates who have successfully joined the company, public institutions are not the same as they imagined, first of all, the work they are engaged in is not as high as the outside world says, and most of them deal with some small things; Secondly, the interpersonal relationship of public institutions is complex, and the phenomenon of promoting vitality is staged every day.
If you want to be promoted in a public institution, it is even more difficult, excellent work ability is only one of the conditions, and the most important thing is whether the leader values his subordinates. So for the novices who have just entered the public institution, how should they tell whether the leader attaches importance to themselves? It can be directly identified from the following five behaviors.
Be casual about your work and don't check.
For Xiaobai, who has just worked, he is afraid of being held accountable by the leader, if he does something that the leader is not satisfied with, it is a very shameful thing to be criticized by the leader. Don't praise you, just criticize you.
Of course, things are two sides of the same coin, and the core is to feel the intention of the boss with your heart. Your personal performance has made the leader feel bad, so the leader wants to hit you, so he arranges important work for you to do, and knows that this job is not suitable for you, and it is difficult for you to do it well, and when you do it wrong, you will find you to criticize you fiercely, say things very simply, make you stupid, make you feel very disappointed in your own performance, and even you are grateful to the leader from the bottom of your heart, thinking that he is reminding you. will only praise you, but not promotion.
Achieving glory in a public institution can completely confirm that the person's work ability is quite excellent, but if the leader often praises someone in the unit and awards relevant honors to the person, there are only two reasons for the leader to do so. First, this person's work ability is really good, and has been recognized by the leaders, so through the form of awards, praise this person for making persistent efforts and set an example in the unit. Only give the burden, not the real job.
Whether it is in a public institution or a private enterprise, you can see some leaders who constantly put pressure on their subordinates, what motivates leaders to continue to increase work for their subordinates? There are two main motives, one is to train subordinates through pressure, which shows that the leader pays great attention to cultivating this person; The second is not to reuse this subordinate, and constantly send some cumbersome content to solve it. Only talk about work, not socialize privately.
Although in the workplace, work ability is the standard to measure promotion, in public institutions, personal sophistication is obviously more important than work ability. As a simple example, many people who have a good relationship with the leader, even if their ability is average, are promoted faster than ordinary people, which suggests the importance of human sophistication.
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It should be all the work left to you, and the good things should be avoided as much as possible. I won't put myself in your shoes, such as considering that you have to take care of your family, you have been on a business trip for a long time, you haven't taken a vacation for a long time, you haven't raised your salary for a long time, etc.
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No matter what industry or position, it is possible to encounter such a leader, and the probability of encountering such a leader may be greater, especially in small and medium-sized enterprises. But no matter when you meet in what industry, I think first of all, you have to recognize, is it really just to treat you as a tool, or you have a preconceived idea of others, if you really meet such a leader, the first thing is to do a good job of your responsibility, because you have a certain ability to negotiate with others, and secondly, you can consider whether to talk to the leader, if you feel that he blindly uses you as a tool, do not listen to your opinions, Then you can "fire" him under the condition of ensuring that your own ability is enough to change positions. In short, the main thing is to improve their overall quality.
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Tools themselves refer to things, not people. Once a tool is equated with a person, it means that the person has become a machine, and he has no judgment of his own, no opinion of his own, and no thought of his own. Obedience has become a typical characteristic of "tool people".
Generally speaking, it is right to obey the instructions of the leader as a subordinate. But this kind of obedience must not be obedience without one's own judgment, obedience without one's own opinion.
If you don't want to be a "tool man", then, let your brain spin.
To get your brain around, you need to grasp the following three points:
First, continuous learning. As soon as many people graduate from college, they begin to eat their old books and end their study time. The impoverishment of systemic knowledge limits the functioning of our brains. Learning is a lifelong thing. If you don't study, your brain will rust.
The second is to be good at thinking. Learning that what is in your stomach needs to be digested, and that requires thinking. Thinking without learning is useless thinking.
There are such people around each of us, they like to ponder things, ponder and ponder, and they are always the big needle in front of them, even this little needle point big thing, it is difficult to figure out it.
The third is to do a good job. Work is a business, and the more work you do, the more things you do, and the more problems you encounter. It is only when there are questions that we can stimulate our ability to think.
When encountering problems, we can use the various knowledge we have accumulated and strengthen our thinking to enhance our judgment and form our own unique opinions and thoughts, which can improve our ability to solve problems. We are not like puppets, at the mercy of others.
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When others see you as a leader, don't think of yourself as a leader, and when others don't see you as a leader, yourself.
When others see you as a leader, don't think of yourself as a leader; When others don't take you seriously....When others regard you as a leader, you don't want to take yourself as a leader; When others don't take you as a leader, you must take yourself as a leader. Treat yourself as someone else to be bland and ecstatic, treat others as yourself to sympathize with misfortune, treat others as others to respect others, and treat yourself as yourself to cherish yourself.
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1. He gives you important work
In the workplace, the work is different, some are more important jobs, some are very general projects, and the difference is quite big. Doing two big projects in a year is more important in leadership than doing five or six general projects.
If you are usually assigned important projects by your leaders, then congratulations, you should cherish and try to seize this opportunity. Generally speaking, leaders will give important work to their henchmen, and if you find that the work you have is important, it means that the leader treats you as their own.
Second, he plots a way out for you
The position is different, and the new drama you are exposed to is also different, usually the leader will plan a good path for you for the people you value, so that you can avoid many detours. It is more obvious that if you go out for training, talk about projects or hold meetings and exchanges, etc., some leaders need to attend by themselves, and he will also consider bringing some subordinates who focus on training together.
In any case, if your boss often takes you to more important social situations, it means that he trusts you more. He usually thinks of you as soon as he has benefits, whether he will give you some benefits and rewards, in fact, he is hinting that you don't want to go, follow him to have meat to eat.
Three, he will pull you
In the workplace, it is inevitable to make mistakes, but some mistakes are small mistakes, and some mistakes are big mistakes. If you accidentally make a mistake, the attitude of the leader can tell whether he treats you as his own person. If he treats you as his own, then he will help you and pull you along, if he doesn't treat you as his own, you will be fired or fined, what does it matter to him?
In other words, if the leader doesn't treat you as his own, he may push you out of the dark pot, but if you are valued by the leader, he will help you when you encounter difficulties or make mistakes.
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The signs that leaders treat you as their own are: trust, care, sharing, recognition, and communication.
1. Trust: When leaders see you as their own person, they will express trust to you, not only in daily work, but also in personal affairs. For example, at some point, when work and life are inevitably intertwined, your boss will feel comfortable entrusting you with some personal tasks.
2. Care: The leaders will spare no effort to provide you with support and help, especially when you need help, they will solve your problems in a timely manner. When you are successful, they will also be happy with your success.
This kind of care, support and encouragement can deeply motivate you to work hard and hard.
3. Sharing: As leaders, they will share the company's internal resources and information with you, and be more open to communicate with you about the company's operation status and the company's future development direction. Sharing this information gives you a sense of being within the company, giving you a greater sense of belonging and responsibility, and a greater ability to succeed in your own business area.
4. Recognition: Leaders are often the people who are close to the top of the company, and they usually belong to those who are very good. With the recognition of these people, you have a lot of communication in the company, which can increase the opportunities for you to communicate with the leaders of various departments in the company.
5. Communication: When you are regarded as your own by the leader, you have greater freedom and communication channels, and you can have an in-depth understanding of the company's internal operations and the company's decision-making process. This also allows you to be more creative and intelligent, and to be involved in many important decisions that help the company grow.
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Have you been used as a tool by the leader, and what method should you use to identify it?
In the workplace, every leader has his own approach and skills in affairs, so many employees will not understand why the leader will treat them with this attitude, in fact, each employee has different abilities, so it is more effective to manage employees, but everyone must be more vigilant in the company because they see the company's employee capabilities and will use employees as a tool to use employees, especially when the company sees the following three signals, do not continue to follow the company's leadership so as not to be deceived.
Leadership makes employees money tools, usually there are these three signals, employees do not continue to follow the leadership often have difficulty hiring workers, assigning difficult tasks to employees, to their own leaders, if they no longer value them, they will give employees a very painful work environment, or employees think that leadership is exercising them through these tasks, but the purpose of the leaders has come, they don't want employees to get high positions in the company, so they often get into trouble and leave employees with no idea what they have done. In fact, after work, it will thank the leader, so I suggest that everyone must add more. Because the leader always goes through similar ways and means, for the difficult employee, never obey the leader, but choose to oppose the company.
Leadership makes employees money tools, usually there are these three signals, employees don't continue to follow, through additional Jia reward employee rewards in the workplace, each leader has their own set of lines, especially when the employees of the company are rewarded in the company, they will provide many additional rewards for the employees, when the employees complete the task, these leaders from the boat, because these employees have no pending attitude, when you treat your work, leadership is an introductory attitude, so when the leader gives the employee a task, To motivate employees, they will trick and reward employees, employees complete tasks, and they find out that they have been cheated. Leadership makes employees a money-making tool, and there are usually these three signals that employees don't continue to follow.
Knowing that employees make mistakes, in the workplace, these managers are more strict, see employees, generally encourage employees, let employees change in time, but if employees are seen as embarrassed, I want to convince these employees, generally addicted to employees. Let the employee continue to work in the company, don't want the employee to take the initiative to correct because the employee is in it, but they don't understand their mistakes, but the leader is not willing to give advice to the employee, the employee becomes more and more wrong, the leader saves a lot of time and energy, and the employee voluntarily resigns.
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This is a bit of a hassle......I know how you feel, but some people have a personality like this, it's hard to treat others as friends, you don't need to care too much, you can just live your own life, and the relationship can slowly improve. There is also the need to reflect on why you can't fit into their circle.
Grievances should be, because you have lost something important, and it is common sense to be angry, anyone who suffers an important loss for no reason will be annoyed, and in many cases may directly quarrel with the family and make a fuss, and then break up for a long time, but we all have to take responsibility for our own actions, think clearly, your family is your closest person, and also your most valuable wealth, do you want to hurt more important family members because of important items that have been lost? Most sane people don't choose to quarrel, but digest their emotions by themselves and then face their families.