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1.Fear of failure to please the other person.
When you are not fully sure of doing something, it will make people nervous, in fact, nervousness will bring you a sense of concentration, quickly replace the body and mind, and complete the goal as much as possible. So sometimes we should be thankful for it, because it cooperates with your actions in the shortest possible time, and not just generates the feeling of boredom. The root cause of tension is precisely the fear that this act of pleasuring will fail.
2.The purpose is divorced from reality.
Some people set a lot of labels for themselves, such as: funny, humorous, knowledgeable and elegant, etc. They believe that only in this way can they win the attention of more people and be the embodiment of their ability.
But they never seem to think about the gap between reality and ideals, and always think about how to be perfect. In some cases, they know they can't do it, but they have to pretend that they can solve it in order to gain inner balance. If you can't disguise it, you will panic extremely, fearing that your incompetence will lead to contempt from others.
Psychologists believe that this tension is caused by a lack of understanding of oneself, and the estimation of ability is beyond the real range, which invisibly brings pressure to oneself.
3.Feeling high danger.
When you're with friends, you might talk about it, but if you're giving a speech in a small auditorium, it's different, so what about performing at the National Centre for the Performing Arts? Doing the same thing, because the tension generated by the change of environment and atmosphere is worlds apart. Let's say you're in a small space with strangers, and there are very few people who can still take it easy.
In fact, there is no change in the difficulty of the content of the speech, but the risk caused by the change of the environment increases the level of tension.
4.The purpose is too clear.
Some people have been the focus of others' eyes since they were young, and they can easily attract the attention of those around them, and they are constantly appreciated and praised. There are also people who always play the role of the green leaves that set off the red flower, and this feeling of not being cared for will make them sad. Therefore, this part of the population will have the urgent need for certain feelings, and it is precisely because of the accumulation of the sense of lack that they will appear to pursue the goal too aggressively, and even do everything for it, resulting in nervous speech.
5.Don't take yourself seriously.
Focusing on others, you get nervous if they don't affirm you, which is a sign of belittlement of yourself. In fact, you don't have to be perfect in the eyes of others, who will put the attention of their life to you? Maybe he just saw your performance by chance, and a casual sentence made you uneasy and restless.
Do you need to be judged by others? Looking at the other person's idea correctly, he may just be giving you advice, and in the end it is up to you to decide. You are good, and being true to yourself is the best.
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Because you regard the other person as too important, you have to treat the other person as an ordinary person, relax yourself mentally, and chat like a friend, so that you don't have to be nervous to talk.
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It is a psychological disorder that needs to be found for a specific cause in order to be effectively addressed.
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Because you are not confident enough, afraid that others will see your psychological instability, so always dodge, dare not look into the eyes of the interlocutor, this is no longer a matter of disrespect, but your psychological problem, you need to look into the eyes of others when they speak, listen carefully to what they are saying, and then you think about what you should say, how to say, and then say, not quickly, but to be clear and clear, so that you will slowly develop your own self-confidence.
Teach you a simple and effective way to talk to girls without thinking about anything before chatting with them. Because the more you think about it, the easier it is to get nervous. When this practice becomes a habit, you are not nervous.
This is a personality problem, shyness or low self-esteem.