What are some jokes that make the class laugh?

1. In the morning, I went to the vegetable market to buy vegetables, and I asked the vendor, "Have you ever used pesticides for this dish?" The peddler thought for a moment and said, "I guess I can't beat it." ”

2. Playing a game of beating the back of a female colleague, I accidentally caught her hand and broke a little epidermis, and then the female colleague took out her mobile phone with a serious face, and when I thought she was going to take a picture and send it to the circle of friends to accuse me, I saw her searching on the Internet: Do you need to get a rabies vaccine if you are caught by a single dog?

3. I found a fortune teller to tell me a hexagram, and he looked at it and said, "This brother, you must have been born in the early hours of the morning." "I was amazed

How do you calculate so accurately? He stroked his beard and said, "Because one to three o'clock in the morning is ugly."

>4. When someone was eating, he couldn't see a piece of beef in the beef ramen, so he pointed to the bowl and asked the boss: Why is there no beef in the beef ramen? The boss said lightly: "Don't be too serious, do you still expect to eat a wife from the wife's cake?" ”

5. Who would have thought that the goddess in my heart would be willing to lose her life for me, she was determined to say: "If you pester me again, I will die." ”

Xiao Ming replied, "I will divide the apple into 6 parts, keep one for myself, and give the remaining 5 parts to my good friends." The teacher asked, puzzled

How is this possible? There are only 5 apples, how do you divide them into 6 portions? Xiao Ming said proudly:

It's very simple, I put my share with the other 5 parts, and it was divided into 6 parts! ”

I would divide the apple into 6 parts, keep one for myself and the remaining 5 for my good friends. The teacher asked, "How is this possible?"

There are only 5 apples, how do you divide them into 6 parts? Xiao Ming said proudly: "It's very simple, I put my share with the other 5 parts, and it was divided into 6 parts!"

Here's a cold joke: One day, a man walked into a store, he walked up to the counter and asked the clerk, "Do you sell sausages?"

The clerk said, "Yes! Then the man asked:

What brand of state crack do you sell? The clerk said, "What brand do you want?"

We have many of them. The man: "I want the sausage of the 'Three Pandas'."

The clerk felt very strange and asked, "Three panda cards?" Did you hear about it from?

The man said, "I haven't heard of it, but I saw it in a dream this morning." ”

Here's a humorous joke: One day, the teacher asked Xiao Ming, "Xiao Ming, can you tell me what the rat likes to drink the most after eating?"

Xiao Ming was stunned for a moment, then thought about it and said, "Teacher, I don't know what it is?" "The teacher said with a smile

What do rats like to drink the most? Rat poop, of course! Xiao Ming immediately felt that this answer was very disgusting, but the next moment, the whole class laughed.

1.A gecko got lost in front of a ** company, and at this time a crocodile happened to crawl over and was going to eat it. In desperation, the little gecko stepped forward and hugged the crocodile's leg and shouted

Mother! The crocodile was stunned for a moment, and immediately burst into tears: "Son, you have lost weight like this in just half a month?"

2.The first time a gentleman took a plane, he was afraid to open his eyes, but after 15 minutes, he opened his eyes, looked out the window, and shouted: "Oh, it's flying so high, people are like ants.!"

The neighbor said: "That's an ant, the plane hasn't taken off yet." ”3.

A lumberjack goes to enlist for a job Foreman: You go ahead and try the woods. See how many trees you can see in a minute.

A minute passed. Foreman: Wow.

20 trees a minute. It's amazing. Where did you work before?

Workers: Sahara Forest. Foreman:

Haven't heard of it. I've only heard of the Sahara. Worker:

That's right. Later, the name was changed! 4.

After the company gets off work, several computers get together to fight the landlord, and the water dispenser also has to play. He loses every time, but still insists on participating every day. The sofa was very incomprehensible and asked the chair:

The water dispenser loses every day, why is it still so energetic? The chair said, "Ask this kind of question, do you have water in your head?" 5.

There were 5 eggs in the refrigerator, and the first one said to the second one: Hey, look at the 5th egg is hairy! It's terrible!

The second withered and said to the third, "Oh, look at the fifth egg!" It's scary, it's scary!

The third said to the fourth, "Oh, look at the fifth egg!" The fifth egg heard:

Get lost! Lao Tzu is a kiwi! 6.

Xiao Ming: "Wow, why is your face so swollen?" Xiaole:

Alas, yesterday while rowing with my father, I was bitten by a mosquito. Xiao Ming: "It's so swollen and hurts, you must have been bitten by it for a long time, right?"

Xiaole: "As soon as it landed on my face, it was killed by my father with an oar." ”

Why is a police pencil triangular one? Because it can be caught between the head and the clothes of the police, and it will not fall off! 2.

What is on the table and can't be straightened? Crooked nuts. 3.

The rooster has a reason why it won't lay eggs, you know what it is? Because it's not a hen! These jokes are unexpected, humorous, and entertaining to the audience, and are classic jokes that can cause the whole class to laugh.

Because it can be caught between the head and the clothes of the police, and it will not fall off! 2.What is on the table and can't be straightened?

Crooked nuts. 3.The rooster has a lead deficit that it doesn't lay eggs, you know what it is?

Because it's not a hen! These jokes are unexpected, humorous, and witty, which can make the audience feel happy, and are classic jokes that can cause the whole class to laugh.

There are also 4 little swallows wearing flower clothes, and they come here every spring, and I ask the swallows why do you come? The swallow said, "Take care of yourself."

05 Father: "You'd better tell me your grades, and if it's too bad, don't recognize me as a father." "Son:

Who are you? "After nine years of compulsory education in '06, I discovered that I could falsify history on the test papers, create language, control the earth, kill Newton, synthesize positive and parallel substances, and change genes.

Do you have any specialties? Xiao Ming: "I can imitate the sounds of animals."

The interviewer was intrigued, so let him put on a show. Xiao Ming began to imitate the barking of a dog, and the interviewer thought it was okay and asked him to continue. Xiao Ming imitated the sound of a cat, a bird, etc., and the interviewer thought it was great.

Finally, Xiao Ming said, "I can also imitate the sound of a mouse." The interviewer was surprised and asked him:

What does a rat cry look like? Xiao Ming: "Hiss......sssThe class burst into laughter!

Xiao Ming: "I can imitate the sounds of animals." The interviewer was intrigued, so let him put on a show.

Xiao Ming began to imitate the barking of a dog, and the interviewer thought it was okay and asked him to continue. Xiao Ming imitated the sound of a cat, a bird, etc., and the interviewer thought it was great. Finally, Xiao Ming said:

I can also imitate mouse calls. The interviewer was surprised and asked him, "What does a rat cry look like?"

Xiao Ming: "Hiss......sssThe class burst into laughter!

2.One day, Xiao Ming went to the hospital to see a doctor, and the doctor asked him, "Have you felt any headaches, chest tightness, or difficulty breathing in hail recently?"

Xiao Ming: "No, but I often feel like a bird lately. The doctor was surprised and asked him:

What do you mean? Xiao Ming: "I mean, I often feel that Yuan Sakura can't fly.

3.One day, Xiao Ming went to the supermarket to buy something, and he saw a bag of milk with "fat-free brother Bi Fat" written on it, so he happily bought a bag. When he got home, he opened the bag and found it empty.

He knew that Liang was angry, so he took the bag and went to the supermarket staff. The staff looked at the bag and said, "This is our latest product, it's called 'weightless' milk."

4.One day, a man went to the doctor and he said, "Doctor, I feel like a dog."

The doctor asked him, "When did you start feeling like this?" The man said:

That's it since I was a kid. The doctor said, "Then why didn't you come to see me earlier?"

The man said, "Because I always thought I was a dog. ”

Summary. Hello dear, I'm glad to answer for you, jokes that can make the whole class laugh: 1. The suburbs!

After dinner, go out for a walk with your girlfriend! The stars in the sky are very beautiful I sit on the lawn with my girlfriend behind me I look up at the starry sky and feel happy and peaceful in my heart, and say: "I want to be back to back with you like this for a lifetime" The female ticket grabbed my neck! :

The old lady is lying on your back! "Second, there are many New Year's gatherings, and etiquette should be kept in mind: those who go to school do not ask about grades, those who go to work do not ask about wages, those who do business do not inquire about income, those who are single do not ask about the love situation, those who are in love do not urge marriage, those who are married do not give birth, and those who have children do not ask about the second child, especially do not ask **.

Hello dear, I'm glad to answer for you, jokes that can make the whole class laugh: 1. The suburbs! After dinner, go out for a walk with your girlfriend!

The stars in the sky are very beautiful I sit on the lawn with my girlfriend behind me I look up at the starry sky and feel happy and peaceful in my heart, and say: "I want to be back to back with you like this for a lifetime" The female ticket grabbed my neck! The old lady is lying on your back!

"Second, there are many New Year's gatherings, and etiquette should be kept in mind: those who go to school do not ask about grades, those who go to work do not ask about wages, those who do business do not inquire about income, those who are single do not ask about the love situation, those who are in love do not urge marriage, those who are married do not give birth, and those who have children do not ask about the second child, especially do not ask **.

Also: Third, we are going to attend a party tomorrow, and everyone is practicing singing, ready to show their singing voices at the party. A classmate with incomplete five tones said that he was going to sing "In the Spring", and he said out of nowhere: "You still sing "Spring in **". ”