In your life, what are the more advanced black ones you have collected for jokes?

Mung Bean said: After my value rises, please call me Bean and you play; Salt said: After my worth rises, please call me Lord Salt; Coal Says:

After my worth has risen, please call me Coal Chaofeng; Garlic said: After my worth has risen, please call me garlic and you are ruthless; Apple said: What can you call me when my worth goes up; Sucrose said:

After my worth rises, please call me Sugar Gaozong; The house said: My worth has risen, please call me a house!

In the stands of the European Championship matches, fans spontaneously formed various square teams to cheer for their national teams. Seeing this, the Russian fans also formed a square team, and then ......It's all gone. ‍‍

A group of people traveled, and a robber said: "I have rules for robbery, the first one only pays 100 yuan, the second 150 yuan, the third 200 yuan, and so on. So people scrambled to line up to pay the money and pushed each other.

The bandits maintained order while collecting money, "Don't push, whoever cuts the queue will be at the back of the line." For a while, he was in order, and the first person in question said: "It's good, only 100 yuan was lost." ‍‍

There is a person named Zhen Gurzy, who married a wife and asked you to take care of it, and gave birth to a son who called trouble. One day the trouble is gone! The couple went to report the crime.

The policeman asked his father: What is your name on this man? Dad said:

It's a shiver. The policeman was angry, and then he asked his mother what her name was. Mom said:

You have to take care of it. The policeman was very angry and said, "What are you going to do?"

The couple said: Looking for trouble.

Snow White escaped from the palace and went to the forest, where she saw a small wooden house lined with seven tiny beds. Snow White lay down and fell asleep. In the evening the seven little men returned, Snow White said:

You are the seven dwarfs of my life. The seven people looked at each other, and then said, "You are in the wrong place, we are gourd babies." ”‍

South Korea is going to shoot "A Bite of Korea". The first episode of Nature's Gift: Cabbage.

The story of the staple food in the second episode: spicy cabbage bibimbap. Inspiration for the third episode of transformation:

How to pickle spicy cabbage. Episode 4: The Taste of Time: How many days do you want to pickle spicy cabbage?

Episode 5: Secrets of the Kitchen: Spicy cabbage doesn't need to be fired. Episode 6: The Harmony of the Five Flavors:

Spicy and sour cabbage. Episode 7 Our Field: Koreans and Cabbage. ‍‍

Before the Tiger Prison Pass, Lu Bu yelled: Come and get your name known! Zhang Fei returned: Yanren Zhang Yide ...... here'Lu Bu is here, waiting for you to die!' Zhang Fei trembled slightly, turned his head and asked Liu Bei: Big brother, how did he know. ‍‍

There was a very beautiful female colleague who got up late one day and rushed to the company without time to put on makeup. As a result, she was recorded as absent from work that day. ‍‍

A: Brother, are you a ** person? b:

Shandong's A: Then will you drive an excavator? a:

Brother, who are you? B: A: in Xiangxi

Will you chase out corpses? A: Who are you?

B: A: I didn't look at you, big brother, A:

Who are you? B: Henan's.

A: (Check the ......... in your wallet.)

The school grass threw me the answer, and the teacher picked it up. As a result, the teacher arrested me at the same table, and the class flower cried injustice, and the teacher was angry, pointing at me and saying: Can it still be for her? For the first time, I thought it was good to be ugly.

I have a friend who has big nostrils. insisted on running in the morning in Beijing, and gained 20 pounds a month

Good leadership. "Wait a minute......”

Needless to say, I know. Prosperity and strength, democracy, civilization, harmony, freedom, equality, justice, rule of law, patriotism, dedication, integrity, friendliness. ”

Classmate, you ......”

Our school-running philosophy is to lay the foundation for students' success, pave the way for teachers' growth, and build the school's high-quality brand".

Ah......"We only have half an hour for each assignment, and we can complete it in an hour and a half every day."

That ......"We just arrive at school at 7:40 and leave school at 5:10 every day."

Excuse me......"We learn the eight rites and four rituals in every class."

But ......"The citizens' convention is to love the country and family, be honest and law-abiding, fair and just, unite and help each other, be diligent and thrifty, and work hard."

Oh no......That ......”

The connotation of the Chinese dream is that the country is prosperous and strong, the nation is rejuvenated, the people are happy, and the great rejuvenation of the Chinese nation is realized".

and so on......"We usually don't have exams, we don't do exercises, we don't have classes, we have a lot of activities, the teachers are kind and friendly, the classmates are united and friendly, everyone reviews in the classroom after class, no one makes trouble, and it is very quiet. Welcome leaders to visit our school, I'm sorry, I'm going home to review".

Teacher: "Xiao Ming, tell me the reason why the three earths are ellipsoids." Xiao Ming: "My mother said yes, my dad said yes, and you said yes." ”

I wish I had brought breakfast to you with a simple "Thank you!" Instead of "Who are you?" How did you get to my house! ”

1 Thou hast great timber and can be of great use. Connotation meaning: If you don't do anything, you roll the calf, don't mix with me. 2You are like a peacock. Connotation meaning: The proverb peacock opens the screen, and it is affectionate.

Hello students, good principal. The students have worked hard, and the principal has worked even harder. The classmates were tanned, and the principal was even darker.

When class started, the teacher first whispered: Hello students! Then the students shouted: Hello teacher!

May I ask who doesn't understand such a classic bridge?

In ancient times, there was a very naughty child, called little naughty, again, after Qingming to put Nianyan a day off, but always do not give a celery judgment, the classmates are sighing, after class the classmates are discussing, who let the teacher give us a holiday tomorrow, we will give him an egg, the little naughty thought about it, very readily agreed to this matter, the little naughty just thought about it, and finally thought of a way, after school, the little naughty took the saw, sawed half of the tree in the thatched house, in ancient times, they were holding a tree on the thatched house, That night, the teacher went to the thatched house, hugged the tree, oops, all of a sudden fell into the thatched house, the thatched house was two meters deep, and the teacher couldn't climb out of it, so he finally climbed out and threw his clothes into the basin. On the second day, when I always smelled that the clothes were still smelly, I closed the door and did not come out, and the students came, knocked on the teacher's door and said ,.. to the teacher