Can anyone come up with a few fresh jokes??? It s better to make it up yourself

There was a man who had a broken bone, and when he went to the hospital, the doctor asked him how he broke his leg, and he complained bitterly: "Today I was walking on the road, I always felt uncomfortable, and it seemed to be sand in my shoes, and I saw a telephone pole, so I stepped forward to hold it, and I trembled and trembled, and a person came, thinking that I was electrified, and the wooden stick hit my leg hard, and I broke my bones." ”

Tell a story, this story is scary at the beginning, hilarious in the middle, and tragic at the end. Once upon a time there was a ghost who let out a fart and died.

One day a restaurant received a thank you letter:

Thank you for the restaurant, since our school held a fly competition, we came to your restaurant, a dozen is more than 200, won the first place, thank you!!

How to distinguish the authenticity of the renminbi?

Prepare a hundred dollars. Fold it in half and fold it in half again, and put it on the ground and step on it. Pick it up and see if the person on it has a nosebleed, and if so, it's true. No stream is fake.

The alien came to the earth and met the farmer, so he stretched out his index finger and middle finger, and the farmer stretched out five fingers when he saw it, and the alien was not convinced, and stretched out his big finger and finger, and the farmer finally only stretched out his big finger, and the alien ran away. When the farmer came home, he said to his companion, "I met a man who said he had three sons, and I said I had five, and he said he had eight daughters.

After the alien went with him, he said to his companion: "I met an earthling, I told him that I killed three people, he said he killed five, I said I was killed with a gun, he said he was killed with a big finger, I obeyed!" ”

Pirated Discs:

are you serious?(Are you serious?) )-no,i’m kidding.(No, I'm kidding.) Translation on the film:

Are you Hilaris?

No, I'm Kadeen.

The manager of a company asked the secretary to forward the official document to the boss

Report to the boss, there is a batch of orders in Europe next month, and I think the company needs to bring someone to a meeting with them. ”

The boss signed a short time behind the official document: "go a head".

After receiving it, the manager immediately instructed his subordinates to buy air tickets and plan the itinerary, while he sorted out his luggage.

On the day of departure, he was stopped by the secretary.

Secretary: "What are you going to do?" ”

Manager: "I'm going to Europe for a meeting!" ”

Secretary: "Does the boss agree?" ”

Manager: "Didn't the boss tell me go a head?" ”

Secretary: "After coming to the company for so long, don't you know the boss's English level?"

The boss meant: go for a head! ”

Red Mansion: This disturbing stone.

Three Kingdoms: This group of resourceful and powerless people in the chaos of the army.

Water Margin: Armor that cannot be withstood in life.

Journey to the West: Turn the bustle into a silence that never dies.

Red Mansion: The Red Mansion is just opposite the green light, and the image is beautiful.

Three Kingdoms: The rolling Yangtze River is passing away, and the fishermen are happy to meet.

Water Margin: Heroic tears, tears like pouring.

Journey to the West: It's so late, do you still want to go to **?

Red Mansions: Dream of Red Mansions: I think they are fourteen or fifteen years old, and the life of a bunch of teenagers is very empty, and they can blame the society, blame the society.

Three Kingdoms: There are only sporadic memories, and I like Zhou Yu in it.

Water Margin: It's annoying, the bad guys always let Song Jiang go.

Journey to the West: Journey to the West is good-looking, and Journey to the West is the youngest scoundrel.

Red Mansion: The heart is higher than the sky, and the life is thinner than paper.

Three Kingdoms: Rolling Yangtze River East Passing Water.

Water Margin: Don't read it.

Journey to the West: It's been 500 years, I ask the common people, and you ask the ghosts and gods.

Red Mansion: Shut up.

Water Margin: The power of human nature and the power of ignoring human nature.

Three Kingdoms: The best masterpiece for fill-in-the-blank questions.

Journey to the West: Gimmicks attract me more than stories.

Red Mansion: The fly in the ointment is not enough to believe in today's party, like a beautiful flower.

Three Kingdoms: Success or failure turns empty.

Water Margin: The blood is dry, the tears are dry, and the enthusiasm is empty.

Journey to the West: I remember when I was young, you loved to talk and I loved to laugh; The years of throwing books in the afternoon are long, and when you wake up, you know that your dreams are empty.

Dream of Red Mansions: It's like a delicately knitted sweater, the words are all there, and they are clear, but you still can't see what kind of secret stitching is used behind it. Even if you learn these stitches, whether you have the physical strength to knit an equally beautiful sweater is another important question.

Three Kingdoms: Every reader participates in the construction of his own "Three Kingdoms" with his own life, between the virtual and the real of history.

Water Margin: The pleasure of the rivers and lakes actually doesn't make people happy at all. People are there, their desires are there, and they can't escape all kinds of human nature even if they are far away from the rivers and lakes.

Journey to the West: A major breakthrough in imagination. But then there is a batch copy of the tiresome story. Resembles today's series of soap comedies.

Red Mansion: Emotions are the greatest tragedy in life.

Three Kingdoms: If a man wants to survive, he can't be without wisdom.

Water Margin: Power harms people, and the system harms people.

Journey to the West: Ancient Rhapsody.

Red Mansion: Classical mood, now boring.

Three Kingdoms: You don't need it once a year.

Water Margin: A peasant uprising will never succeed.

Journey to the West: I like to talk about Journey to the West.

Red Mansion: The children of the Grand View Garden are long-sighted.

Three Kingdoms: Wei, Shu and Wu are all one.

Water Margin: Liangshan Bo heroic grass kou.

Journey to the West: Assimilation in front of the Buddha in Leiyin Temple.

The child asked his mother: Why can't the flame of the candle stop when it keeps flickering? Mom said: Because this is a spiritual fire [Erha].

There was a duck named Xiao Huang, and one day he was hit by a car

I have two good friends named Hee Hee Haha.

One day haha died.

Hee hee said in front of the grave of Haha.

Haha, you're dead".

【Joke 1】 Radio gymnastics starts now: 囧 囧

Ah, I'm not very good at telling jokes, but I think there are so many ways you can release stress. You can sing, exercise, play with friends and family, or simply go on a trip.

Youth Q&A.

Q: Which of the four famous remakes do you like the most? Answer: Returning the beads.

Q: What thoughts did you have at any given moment? Answer: Robbery of banks.

Q: If you are Tang Bohu, what do you want to do with autumn fragrance? A: @秋香.

Q: What shortcomings do you have that you can't bear the most? A: There are too many advantages.

Q: Who is safest to share their secrets? Answer: Pigs.