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Mom and Dad are irritable, irritable, and often have family wars, which not only cause damage to the child's psyche, but also subtly teach Mom and Dad to use simple and violent methods when encountering difficulties and dealing with problems. Children who are emotionally hungry have weaker ability to communicate with others. I obviously want to be friendly with my children, but I don't know how to express it.
Some children will deliberately behave abnormally for the attention of others, such as biting, hitting, crying and other behaviors. Children with aggressive tendencies are not necessarily strong personalities, but because they are weak and insecure, they just use force to protect themselves.
In view of the child's situation, I suggest: improve the child's sense of security as soon as possible, let him feel the love of his relatives, if there is a condition, or do not board, his problem lies in the family, and the bell must be tied to the bell. In the family, you are taught several ways to deal with your child's irritability and temper tantrums.
1.Get the right medicine. What children need most when they have tantrums is to be understood and tolerated by others.
Parents should first try to understand them, and then understand the child's thoughts, and begin to analyze why the baby has a tantrum and prescribe the right "medicine". We should first calm the child's mind, calm him down, listen to the child's thoughts, and find out the reason for the tantrum. Find out the essence of the matter, and then patiently teach him how to do it and analyze what is wrong.
Reasoning after your child has been comforted is much more effective than preaching when you have a problem.
2.Extinction method. The extinction method is to eliminate certain factors that reinforce undesirable behaviors in order to reduce the occurrence of undesirable behaviors.
When parents find that their child is short-tempered, they should communicate with the teacher more so that they can find out the reason for the child's rebellious behavior and eliminate it as soon as possible. It is necessary to discover the child's bad behavior in time and take measures to teach the child how to deal with conflicts.
3.Cryogenic treatment. When the child is vexatious, cold treatment can be used.
Giving him a break when appropriately compulsory, diverting the child's attention in a different way, giving a gentle cue, or giving a temporary snub may have an effect. Over time, the child will know that the tantrum method is not effective, and he will stop using it to achieve his own goals. After that, under the patient guidance of my parents, I slowly learned to control my emotions.
4.Positive booster method. Positive reinforcement is the belief that reward reinforcement is given immediately after a behavior, and that the behavior is reinforced.
When the child has made progress in controlling his emotions, parents should give timely praise and recognize the child's performance. Take a praising approach and let him experience the joy of it.
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It has a lot to do with heredity, parents' education methods, family environmental influences, etc., it is not easy to cultivate a child, habits are slowly formed, first of all, parents should lead by example, can not shout, play more detailed games with children, such as building blocks, counting beans, etc., to train children's patience. Some babies with a hot liver can also be irritable.
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Although children are the hearts and minds of parents, there are also many parents who are often angry because of their children. Children brought out by those irritable parents are often not so psychologically healthy, and there are more or less shadows. Those parents who have a small temper are often the "nemesis" of their children, and a look of parents can scare their children to tremble, and an action can scare their children to run away.
This not only makes the child fearful, but also invisibly infected with irritable emotions.
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Some parents often report that their children are difficult to discipline, such as some children are impulsive, irritable and love to hit others, some children are timid and cowardly and do not like to go to school, and some children love to suck their fingers and ...... when they are very oldAre these situations the result of a child's innate personality or improper education? How can parents intervene to correct bad behavior? Prone to impulsive tantrums or flare-ups.
Performance: Some children are very impulsive and irritable, lose their temper when they don't go well, and are very aggressive, some parents think that this is a natural personality, or a low emotional intelligence expression, in fact, many times it is a psychological problem.
Main reason: Although some babies do have impulsiveness and irritability due to the reaction of the innate nervous system, most children with a big temper are still related to the acquired education and environment. Dr. Cha Caihui gave a case:
A 7-year-old child had a psychological brother failure counseling due to his temper, and Dr. Cha found that the child's mother was very stubborn and arbitrary, always interrupting his father's speech, and even deliberately found an excuse to prohibit the child from going to the countryside to see his grandparents.
Intervention Skills: Temporary Isolation Parents should be role models.
If the child has a tantrum, you can isolate him in a more monotonous and trembling place under the premise of ensuring the safety of the environment, calm down for a few minutes, and avoid anyone to comfort him. In addition, parents must be self-reflective, try not to set a bad example in front of their children, especially not to quarrel in front of their children, and pay attention to temper control. Babies over the age of three are overly dependent on their parents or family members.
Manifestations: Children over the age of 3 are still very dependent on their parents or family members, and one of Dr. Cha's patients is a 3-year-old child, like a koala, lying on his father's shoulder all the time, even if he plays with the most interesting toys, he must be accompanied by his father.
Main reason: Generally speaking, it is generally normal for babies under 2 years old to be attached to their families, and they will gradually adapt to the separation from adults as they grow older. Some older children have severe dependency disorders that may be related to the fact that they have been inseparable from adults in their daily lives since childhood, such as taking too much care of and protecting children, making children feel that they need adults to do everything.
In addition, children who lose their mother's care at an early age (especially between 3 months and 1 year old) may be more likely to develop attachment problems.
Intervention Skills: Let your child do one thing independently.
For children with dependence, parents should gradually train their children to do some things independently, especially let them experience the sense of accomplishment of completing one thing independently, and slowly children will find that there are many fun things to do without their parents. Secondly, when parents leave their children, do not sneak away without a sound, be sure to tell their children and say that they will definitely come back.
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How to deal with your child's irritable behavior? You must first identify the root cause of your child's temper and prescribe the right medicine! First, the parents are not in harmony and the family atmosphere is not good.
A child who lives in a loving family must have a gentle and happy personality. On the contrary, it is easy for children to form irritable and emotional children. Parents should build a warm family for their children and provide a good environment for them to grow up.
Second, parents are too strict with their parents. Parents should not have the pursuit of parental authority, parents put too much emphasis on obedience in the family, children are often severely disciplined and oppressed, such children are either inferior and suppressed, or provocative temper and parents do against them. Third, parents are too indulgent to their children.
Parents give their children all the rights and blindly satisfy their children, and the parents of such children will be angry and lose their temper when they can't satisfy themselves.
Most of the problems in children stem from the influence of parents' daily life and inappropriate parenting styles. The child has a short temper and loves to talk about it, which means that there are a lot of emotions accumulated in the child's heart. When a child's emotions, especially some negative emotions, such as sadness, anger, sadness, etc., do not have a chance to vent, he may find another way.
Sometimes you see that your child may get angry over trivial things, but in fact, your child may just be dealing with some emotions that have accumulated before him. If you think about it from another angle, children who love to lose their temper will actually have a stronger sense of frustration in their hearts. Remember that when a child doesn't look so cute, that's when he especially needs to be loved.
We can't just measure the child from the child's temper tantrum behavior, because we don't know what kind of situation his heart is, and we can't just stare at the corrective behavior itself, only by helping the child really clean up the mud of his inner emotions, so that the child has a normal channel to vent his emotions, and at the same time help him build self-confidence, he can really get rid of the cycle of love and temper and stupidity. When a child loses his temper, think about what the message he really wants to convey.
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The child's sexual limbs are easy to get angry, and parents of such children need to use it. Dealing with violence in the same way makes children understand that burying violence in the past will not solve the problem. There will only be bad consequences.
Then enlighten the child a little bit that violence will not end well, so that the child understands.
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The first thing you should do is to reassure your child, then tell him that this behavior is wrong, and then guide your child correctly, so that you can deal with your child's irritable behavior.
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I think we should explain the child more, so that the child will be in a good mood and will not be so easily angry.
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Spend more time with your children and guide your children's emotions well, as irritability can easily harm others and yourself.
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