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Parents of rebellious children often complain that their children have changed from a good baby to a "little donkey". During adolescence, children will have volatile mood fluctuations, and even violent conflicts with their parents, leaving many parents helpless and helpless. For rebellious children, how can parents establish a good parent-child relationship?
To establish a positive parent-child relationship, parents should first make it clear that the purpose of education is to raise the child to be a real person, not an object that satisfies the vanity of the parents, or a copy of the will of the parents.
Secondly, we must understand that the only way to cultivate is to trigger the child's own growth, so that he can consciously grow on his own, not for the sake of his parents or anything else.
During the child's rebellious period, many "parent-child relationships" that seemed good in the past seem to have gone wrong all of a sudden. In order to change their children, parents go from criticizing, reprimanding, and making noise to being helpless and anxious. In fact, the right thing to do should be that parents start by changing themselves and re-establishing a positive parent-child relationship.
In the establishment of parent-child relationship, there are "three high-voltage lines" and "two traps" that parents should pay special attention to. The "three high-voltage lines" are ignoring the child's presence, destructive criticism and coercion, which can greatly damage the child's self-esteem, self-confidence and sense of independence, and destroy the parent-child relationship. The "two traps" are "conditional love" and "the mentality that you can't afford to lose".
The mentality that you can't afford to lose" is a clear manifestation of distrust of children. Wanting to know everything about your child, or even wanting to keep an eye on your child at all times, knowing what he or she is doing, can be very offensive to your child and destroy the trust and relationship between you. According to the statistics of the on-site questionnaire, nearly half of parents said they wanted to know anything about their children, indicating that at least nearly half of parents may have fallen into the trap of "can't afford to lose".
Never use material rewards to motivate your child to do something, this is a transaction and not love, in this condition, no matter what you do, the child will not feel your love, he will not be grateful to you. He sees it as a conditional exchange. Survey data shows:
Twenty-three per cent of parents still have this mentality, believing that their children's material needs are being met. Children should study well.
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Children will have a period of rebellion, and there is also a stage of teenagers, which depends on the stage of maturity of children! Generally speaking, during this period of time when children are rebellious, what you need to understand is what is the cause of rebellion, some families spoil their children too much, and will make rebellious actions under the scolding of parents, and some parents are often not at home, and they will also cause children to take good care of their children, or children are bullied and abused at school and other reasons will cause rebellious behaviors, so parents should understand and guide for the first time to know the reasons and then solve the problem through guidance, attention, interaction with children, care, etc., And often understand the child's inner world, try to integrate into the child's world when communicating, and regard yourself as the child's friend, so that you can effectively solve the problem and find the problem.
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Later, when I grew up and stayed away from my parents' nagging, when I heard others compliment me, I realized that I was not bad and that I was still very good. I've made some achievements through my own efforts.
Now that I have become a parent, I will lose control in the face of naughty children, and I will repeat the way my parents taught me back then, knowing that it is wrong but I will involuntarily use it. At that moment, I deeply understood the mood of my parents back then, "hatred of iron does not make steel". When I became a parent, I realized that it was not easy for my parents.
From the day I became a parent, I told myself to do my best to educate you well, but slowly I found that you have your own temper, your own preferences, and your own persistence. Your hardness has repeatedly hit a wall in my bright educational prospects, and I have learned that you are not a little clay figure, and I can become what I want if I carve it at will. You have your own ideas (you know what you want, what you don't want, what you like and what you don't like), you have your own temper, and your mother is proud of your choices, but also worried about your stubbornness, because you are still young, it is inevitable that you will make the wrong choice, and you do insist on not listening to advice.
It's really hard to be a parent, and everything is good for the child.
I still remember when I was in school, my parents always said that when you look at how other people's children are doing, I will be very unhappy. I always feel that in the eyes of my parents, I am useless, and I am not as good as others. Because of this, I feel inferior and not good at talking.
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There are many reasons why a child is rebellious, and every child's situation may be different. Here are some common possible causes of rebellion in children:
1.Seeking independence and autonomy: Adolescence is a period in which a child craves independence and explores their identity. They may no longer be willing to fully follow their parents' guidance and try to seek their own independence and autonomy.
2.Problems with the learning environment: Factors such as a poor learning environment, school problems, or difficulties interacting with peers can also cause a child to be rebellious. This can include letter books such as academic pressure, bullying, declining academic performance, or conflicts with teachers.
3.Family problems: Tension or disharmony in family relationships can also lead to a child being rebellious. This can include conflicts within the family, communication problems between family members, excessive parental control or estrangement, etc.
4.Psychological and emotional problems: Some children may face psychological and emotional problems such as stress, anxiety, depression, etc., which can cause them to exhibit rebellious behaviors to express their distress and dissatisfaction.
5.Social environment: Factors such as social circles, influences, and social pressures may also have an impact on a child's rebellious behavior. Peer pressure, imitating bad behavior, or social acceptance of a certain behavior can all motivate children to exhibit rebellious behavior.
It is important to note that these causes do not exist independently, but are often the result of a combination of factors. It is important to understand the reasons for the child's rebellious behavior, and parents can try to establish good communication and understanding with the child to find solutions to the problem and consider professional help and support if necessary.
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The reason for the child's rebellion, 1, if the child is overly spoiled, living in a life of being pampered by the family for a long time, accustomed to everything self-centered, everything only pursues self-satisfaction, such a child lacks the concept of right and wrong and a sense of responsibility, in the eyes of the child, he is the rules and discipline, but can not listen to what others say, but others must listen to him, if such a child is in the rebellious period, the character will become more arrogant, the behavior will become more exaggerated, no one in the eyes, even dared to ride on the head of his parents to talk and do things, and he couldn't stand a little grievance. 2. Overly strong parents are strong parents who say the same thing about their children's education, they do not seriously consider the children's inner thoughts and wishes, and even rarely show their feelings for their children in front of their children, will not praise their children's progress, and will not do some actions to love their children. It is difficult for parents who are too strong to gain the convincing of their children, the child's emotions have been suppressed for a long time, and the consequences of the child's long-suppressed emotions in the rebellious period are unimaginable, and the child in the rebellious period will become very sensitive, and in the face of parents' blind criticism and accusations, the child's psychological pressure is also skyrocketing.
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When the child was just born, the scum and sleepiness didn't understand anything, and the parents needed to slowly teach him to eat, talk, and walk, and when the child reached a certain age, there would be a rebellious period, so do you know what the reason for the child's rebellion is? Let me tell you.
1. The long-term backlog of family relationships and discord in family relationships are all taken by the children in their hearts and have been endured without saying anything; After reaching the limit of the child's tolerance, it will accumulate and explode.
2. Parents are too strict, and children can't stand the pressure, which leads to rebellious children.
3. Some parents are too concerned about their children and always have endless words to nag their children. As he spoke, he criticized the child, and the child would inevitably have a rebellious psychology after listening too much.
4. Parents do not set a good example, and children will express their dissatisfaction in their hearts with rebellious emotions in order to vent their dissatisfaction.
5. Parents neglect to communicate with their children and are indifferent to their children's ideas, and over time children will become silent and rebellious.
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It has a lot to do with our traditional Chinese concept, and at the same time, parents attach too much importance to their children, so they will unconsciously put all their energy on their children, which leads to this phenomenon.
When we were children, we would always hear our parents whispering in our ears, to study hard, to get ahead in a good school, to get ahead in the future, parents with a strong desire to control and even want their children to follow the route they planned, you say that parents love their children, it is indeed love, but this kind of love is mixed with selfishness and strong personal feelings, we all know that parents are doing this for our good, but they just say a word for our good, and then we want to do what they say, once we don't do it, Or if they don't reach their goal, they will blame them, say things like disobedient and regret later.
Growing up with children, setting an example for children, than unilaterally pinning expectations on children will be better, more often you must learn to respect children, ask children's opinions, you are also from the child stage, don't do what you hated your parents at the beginning, and now repeat it on your children.
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The child is too rebellious because the child has a favorite hobby, courage, courage, communicate with the child more, empathize, and change the child.
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1. The child's curiosity is not satisfied.
Children are always curious about everything around them, because they don't understand everything and want to try everything. As parents, we are always worried that the child will bump into it, and we always blindly stop it, although the purpose is out of love, but it will lead to the child's curiosity not being satisfied, which will cause rebellion. At this time, parents need to explain the consequences of doing this to their children, and accompany them to practice when necessary.
Doing so will not only increase the parent-child relationship, but also allow the child to satisfy his or her curiosity.
2. Children's self-esteem.
Maybe some parents think that their children are still young and don't understand anything, and it would be good for adults to help make decisions, and if they don't listen, they will be solved by scolding a few times. In this way, over time, the child will also lose his temper. Dogs will jump over the wall when they are in a hurry, but what about people?
A high-level creature with a mind? People are in a hurry, and they still don't want to do anything with you? Therefore, parents should learn to respect their children, communicate with their children, understand what their children think, and give their children the right to speak with abrasiveness.
3. Spoiling children too much.
Some parents love their children very much, even if they do something wrong, they will think that their children are so small that they do something wrong, but they do not educate and guide them in time, so that their children will be wrong again and again. This kind of behavior is also not feasible, and the child will develop a mentality: there is nothing wrong with the anointing he made, and it is someone else who is wrong.
The consequence is that he continues to fuel the wind of error.
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Hello, glad for your question. Children may be rebellious for the following reasons: Resistant to peeling.
1.Self-identity: Adolescents are in the stage of self-identity, they need to find their identity and role, and rebellion may be one of the ways they express themselves.
2.Stress: Teens face many pressures, including academic, family, social, etc., that can cause them to feel frustrated and powerless, thus exhibiting rebellious behavior.
3.Free will: Teens want to have more freedom and control, they want their thoughts and actions to be respected and recognized, and rebellion may be one of the ways they express this need. Changcha.
4.Family environment: The family environment may have an impact on a child's rebellious behavior, such as excessive parental control and pressure, poor parent-child relationship, etc.
5.Social influence: The social environment, peers, and ** have an impact on a child's values and behavior patterns, which can lead them to exhibit rebellious behavior.
The above are some of the reasons why children are often rebellious, but not all children will show rebellious behavior, parents should pay attention to their children's needs and emotions, establish good communication and trust relationships, and help them solve problems and cope with challenges.
1. Encourage more.
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