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Learn the "three-step method" and master the basic principles of dealing with people, so that a person will no longer be so straight when he speaks or does things:
The first is the enlightenment method.
It is through in-depth and meticulous ideological work that he can fully understand the harm caused by speaking or doing things too straightforwardly, and solve the problem of ideological understanding.
Some people may think that a person who speaks or does things too straight is a manifestation of a person's uprightness and strong principle, and it is an advantage; Some people also believe that a person who speaks or does things too straight is a sign of being sluggish, stupid, and not being flexible in doing things.
Both views are incomplete and have a certain one-sidedness.
We advocate that a person speak or act straightly, but on the premise of not violating the principle, he must also be flexible; We are against a person who speaks or acts too tactfully, who is unclear and unprincipled.
The normal approach is to adhere to the principle of speaking or doing things, and also pay attention to the flexibility of speaking or doing things.
The organic combination of the two is the correct way to speak or do things normally.
The second is the contrastive method.
There are many such examples in reality, from which we can select one or two representative cases, and then analyze them in detail, so that they can intuitively feel the many inconveniences caused by talking or doing things too directly to people's work and life, and solve practical problems.
For example, on issues of principle, or major issues of right and wrong, right is right, wrong is wrong, and you must speak or do things straight, and you must also adhere to your own point of view; On some non-principled issues, as long as the other party can understand or understand the original meaning of what you say or do, don't have to say it directly, you can be tactful or use words to give the other party some face or dignity to help you behave and do things better.
Through the comparison of before and after examples, we can more intuitively know how to say and do when encountering people and things, and how to achieve twice the result with half the effort.
The third is to teach the Dharma by word and deed.
It is to demonstrate through one's own words and personal practice, so that they can better master the correct way to speak or do things.
When encountering specific problems in reality, first let him judge how to say this thing and what should be done, then help him analyze the effect of straightforward and euphemistic pointing, and finally let him face it and practice it himself.
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When you speak, you need to think about your own meaning, express humor and optimism, and it will feel interesting and comfortable!
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There are good and bad, and it bluntly shows that people are more bold and approachable. But sometimes there are many people who are too straightforward to offend, and they just offend people for some reason. Actually, I think it's better to be straightforward.
After all, the Tao is not the same, and it is faster to solve the problem directly. I'm more appreciative of straightforward people, and I'm more straightforward.
For example, if you want to say this, you are in good spirits today, and I miss you very much. (This is too straightforward and has no emotional taste).
If you say this sentence in another way, it will be very different: I am not in a good mood today, and I miss you a little! (It seems that the meaning is similar, but in fact it is very different), this sentence includes (implicit and tactful) in it.
Shoes are comfortable when they fit, think about your feet, look for your shoes, time will change everything, everyone else you have experienced has experienced it, and everything will be fine.
Simply say that you are going to get married sooner or later, what is yours is yours, you can't run away, it is recommended to exercise, work hard to make money, don't think nonsense, live happily, I wish you good luck every day, remember to give me Oh, I need experience to help more people!
Straightforward, literally straightforward, simple. It's like plain water. It is often used to describe people who speak directly, do not beat around the bush, are straightforward, and simple and clear.
Personality is hard to change. People who speak straight are very good, and they don't have bad intentions. I just like people who talk straight.
A person who speaks bluntly may have a too upright personality or be bold.
But it's not like everything can be said straightforwardly, or it depends on the atmosphere of the occasion to see if you can say that.
Everything is two-sided, there are good times, there are bad times, some people like more straight people, and it's good to speak outright, although Sendong sometimes offends people, but people who understand your character will not worry about you, know that you are a straight person, as long as the heart is not bad, others still like you. And even if those who are scheming speak well, there are people who don't like them, so there are no absolutes in everything. Be yourself, just have a clear conscience.
The artistic conception of the lyrics written by the mainland is still up to the kind of artistic conception written by Taiwanese, many of which are too straightforward and vulgar.
The forest is big, and there are all kinds of birds.
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How to get rid of speaking too straight and think twice before speaking. Restrain your frizzy heart. Mention it through a friend.
First of all, we have to think about everything. We can't just say whatever comes to mind. Fast-talking.
Because sometimes the speaker has no intention, but the listener has a heart. Often, some of our unintentional words will be used by those who have intentions. Actions that are extremely detrimental to us.
and bad influences. Second, we can restrain our frizzy hearts. When you're alone, try to calm down and think about what you're doing.
And think about what you should do when you encounter something, how to deal with it, do it or collapse? Third, learn some tips for being a human being. We can mention it to us through our friends.
Give us some hints of proper teamwork when it comes to facts, so that we know what to say and what not to say. At this time, a good friend is equivalent to a teleprompter around us. restrained our words and deeds, so that we could suffer less social losses.
Think twice before you speak.
When we encounter something that is pure and round, if we say that we need to give someone an evaluation, or when we want to give someone one. We can't express what we really thought in our hearts at that time, but we should express what we wanted to say at that time to the other party euphemistically through the cultivation of some words, rather than saying what we want to say directly, because it is very likely to offend some people because of your quick words. Because not all the words that came to mind at the time were good.
Even if we want to convey this meaning to the other person, we have to embellish the words.
Restrain your frizzy heart.
There are things you can do that will help us regain our peace of mind. **When we have free time, we can learn some tea or learn to be alone. A person calms down and thinks about things.
You can calm down and go through the events of the day in your mind and think of the best way to respond. When we think clearly, the next time we encounter the same thing, we will be able to have a good way to deal with it, instead of messing around.
Mention it through a friend.
A good friend reveals this matter, because a good friend who has been doing well for a long time must know something bad about you. At this point, you express to them that you want to correct the mistake and ask them to give you a timely reminder. Good friend Wu Yayu is the best teleprompter, because they can know what you say, what you should say, and what you shouldn't say the facts.
This is the most convenient and fastest way to do this. Of course, you can only tell your trusted friends about this matter, otherwise some villains may as well take advantage of this to frame you.
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Speaking too straight needs to change. It will bring a lot of troubles to yourself and others.
We must learn to empathize, consider problems from the perspective of others, follow the precepts of our ancestors, be sensitive to what we say, and then talk about it after thinking about it, pay more attention to the timing, occasion, and communication object, and do not say less or not when we don't know how to say it, listen to what others say first, think about our own position and views, and then express them accurately and popularly.
1. When you usually read books and dramas, it is very important to think more, observe and think about these two points.
3. Slow down the pace of speech, leave time for yourself to think, and make good use of supplementary explanations when conveying important matters. Wheel base.
4. Say less useless words, and if you say more, you will lose.
5. Don't feel humorous, feel that your jokes are very advanced, Chinese can't afford to make jokes.
6. Speaking words that are commonly defined in Mandarin, do not use local words, which may be ambiguous.
7. Don't ask others about their privacy, don't talk nonsense about things you don't understand, just talk about things that are okay all over the world, good words, important things in things, even if you are a good friend, don't say your own important things, many things are done by yourself.
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1.Learn to keep your mouth shut.
This can be said to be the easiest and most direct way to change the "talk but the brain". "Learn to speak in three years, and learn to shut up in a lifetime". When you don't know whether to say a word or not, don't say it; When you hesitate about something to do, do it.
By following these two points, you can avoid a lot of unnecessary worries and hassles. Among the speaking techniques, "shut up" is the easiest and most operable, and if you are afraid of saying something inappropriate, you might as well start with silence is golden.
2.Control the tone.
Before thinking about what is good to say, it is important to note that the way the speech is expressed – the tone of voice is also important. The specific operation is to reduce the speed of speech, reduce the voice, and soften the intonation. If the speed of speech is too fast, the speed of the brain cannot keep up with the output of the language, and it is naturally easy to say some "mindless" words; Being too loud and appearing less polite and respectful to others; The tone is too hard, and no matter what you say, you will inevitably feel aggressive.
In fact, each of us will have a unique aura, and in the process of talking to others, there will also be an exchange of aura.
3.Practice deliberately to avoid "blurting out".
One of the manifestations of speaking but not being able to speak is that it is easy to "blurt out". So how do you get rid of the bad habit of arguing for words and blurting out? American psychologist Alexon once pointed out that no matter what the field, the effective way to improve skills and abilities all follow a set of universal principles, which he named "deliberate practice".
We can also change the habit of blurting out by deliberately practicing: for example, using every conversation with others as a "exercise", concentrating, and deliberately leaving a few seconds for ourselves to think before expressing. These few seconds can help you understand the meaning of the other person's words, and second, they can buy you time to figure out what to say.
After practicing to a certain level, you can gradually get used to "think before you speak".
4.Change to be self-centered and learn to empathize.
Talking is not a brain, it is not necessarily "no brain", or it may not be a habit of not developing a brain. This requires us to reflect on why we refuse to use our brains before speaking, and whether we are too self-centered and do not consider the feelings of others. Therefore, from now on, you must also learn to empathize in conversation, think about assuming that you are the other person before speaking, imagine how the other party will feel when you hear what kind of words, and believe that after thinking about it, you will know what to say and what not to say.
5."Don't tell all lies, don't tell all the truth".
There is only one kind of heroism in the world, that is, after recognizing the truth of life, you still love life", and similarly, there is also a kind of heroism when talking, that is, you can see through it without saying it. It's not about making you a dishonest person, it's about hoping that you'll be able to selectively say the right part, not to show off, not to expose. Sometimes we see the whole truth, but we don't have to be clever and discuss.
Tacit understanding is also a tacit expression, to be honest, but not to confess.
It will be easy to learn in your own way, and sometimes it is easy to change some learning content to a different way of thinking. For example, remembering the English word panda is the most basic p and a, which is understood as p and a together, panda.
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