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In fact, there is no big problem, such a problem will be encountered by almost everyone, but the degree of distress is different, in essence, this is a conflict between the appeal of an independent personality and the maintenance of interpersonal relationships, you dare not say, for fear of offending people - this shows that in fact, in the previous mode of getting along, you have been hiding your thoughts, in a passive state, and others will also regard it as your normal state.
When you tell the truth uncharacteristically but disrupt interpersonal harmony, your behavior will be seen as abnormal behavior by the group and negate you, and then a vicious circle will be formed, and eventually you may not be able to hold back and have a last big outbreak, which will lead to bad results.
Personal advice, please tailor your own clothes:
1.Look at this rationally first, don't be too emotional.
2.Rebuild your confidence: It is advisable to start expressing your true thoughts slowly, provided that you are not too aggressive, and it is also advisable to learn to modify your language appropriately, sometimes with the same awareness, but the effect varies greatly depending on the form of expression.
3.As you slowly learn to express your true self, observe the feedback of the people around you and make appropriate adjustments.
4.Accept yourself: This is a process of growth, it is very normal, but everyone can not achieve a complete balance, if sometimes overreact, don't be too guilty and self-blame, because it's like a pendulum, suppressed for too long will inevitably swing to the other extreme, what you need to do is to slowly learn to release your reasonable emotions while controlling yourself.
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Don't dare to express that it is fear, afraid of some unbearable and unpleasant things in your heart Take your time, don't panic, be brave, and not be afraid of difficulties. Try to face these inner thoughts.
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You are a little too introverted in this matter, or try to try more, it is recommended to read Adler's "Inferiority and Transcendence", which introduces the ** and root causes of inferiority, as for the methods of eliminating inferiority mentioned in the book, it depends on what you think.
Understand how low self-esteem arises? What kind of behavior is prone to infarction complex? Then choose the method that suits you and correct it slowly.
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It's just that this person is usually used to being depressed, no.
Good at articulating, or having expressed something before.
What an idea, but it was ignored by others.
So it's a habit.
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The older you get, the more lonely you become. But it is a problem that all people have encountered in their upbringing.
I thought it was because my friends got married and went their separate ways, and the pressure of life and work was too great, and there was always a time to get together. Later, I found out that it may be because people's gossip minds are too strong, so people don't dare to say it and don't want to say it.
Everyone may have a lot of ideas in their hearts and want to find a confidant to talk to, but they are afraid that they will not understand and feel that their ideas are childish and ridiculous. Then make a big publicity, and you will become the laughing stock of others because of it.
There was once such a story, "How the Cow Died", and the moral was very profound.
Here's how the story goes:
The ox came back from ploughing the field and lay down in the pen, panting from exhaustion, and the dog came running to see it.
Alas, old friend, I'm so tired. Niu complained bitterly, "I really want to rest for a day tomorrow." ”
After the dog said goodbye, he met the cat in the corner. The dog said, "Man, I went to see the cow just now, and this big brother is so tired that he says he wants to rest for a day." It's no wonder that the owner has given it too much and too much work. ”
The cat turned to the sheep and said, "The cow complains that the master has given it too much and too much work, and it wants to rest for a day and stop working tomorrow." ”
The sheep said to the chicken, "The ox does not want to work for its master, and complains that it has too much work and too much work." Alas, I don't know if other masters are any nicer to his cattle. ”
The chicken said to the pig, "The cow is not ready to work for its master, but wants to go to another master's house." It is true that the owner did not feel sorry for the cow at all, and made it do so much heavy and dirty work, and beat it violently with a whip. ”
Before dinner, the housewife fed the pig, and the pig stepped forward and said, "Housewife, I have something to tell you. The cow's mind has been very problematic lately, and you have to educate it well.
It doesn't want to work for its master anymore, because it thinks it's too heavy, too dirty, and too tiring. It also said that it was leaving its master and going to another master. “
After receiving the pig's report, at the dinner table, the housewife said to the master, "The cow wants to betray you, it wants to change its owner." Betrayal is unforgivable, what are you going to do with it? ”
Treat the betrayer without mercy! The master said through gritted teeth.
Poor, a hard-working and honest cow was rumored to have been "killed" to death.
We have read a lot of such stories, and we don't like to talk about them very much after Hu Hengshou came, maybe this is the so-called maturity.
Mature people can often control their thoughts, behaviors, mouths. But the more mature a person is, the more he loses that innocence in his heart. I always want to live in a simple living environment, without intrigue, without calculation, without thinking too much, just do my own things well.
But in the end, I found that there were too many people with many eyes. This may not be good. My good friends sometimes teach me how to play tricks, which is very tiring.
I'm just a simple person, I don't like to think too many complicated things, happy is happy, like is like, I like to meet people I like, and I like to go where I like. Don't ask for help, but accept help from others. It's so simple, it's happy, it's good.
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Summary. Getting rid of low self-esteem can be achieved through various methods such as strengthening learning, improving ability, and communicating with others.
Why don't you dare to express your inner thoughts very scared.
Dear, you are afraid to express your inner thoughts, and you may have a little low self-esteem. Understand your feelings.
Getting rid of low self-esteem can be achieved through various methods such as strengthening learning, improving ability, and communicating with others.
So how to improve it.
I just didn't dare to express what I was afraid of.
Kind of cares about what other people think.
Dear, what is your heart afraid of?
How old are you? Did you study or work?
I've been working for a long time, but I'm relatively simple, I have too little experience, I'm afraid of conflict, and I don't know what to say when something happens.
Dear, people come to this world to resolve conflicts and deal with conflicts. From a philosophical point of view, contradictions are everywhere and everywhere. Can you give an example of what kind of contradiction covers the rock ridge, and you don't know what to say when it happens, and let the teacher help you analyze it?
It's about some uncomfortable places between friends, and so on, and I'm just afraid of communication, and I just feel that the place can't listen to me.
Oh, interpersonal communication is so fast, words and deeds are bridged, and there will be no major problems if the other party feels comfortable. How do you make the other person comfortable? It is to consider the problem from the other party's position more, say that the other party likes to listen to it early or is willing to listen, and do what the other party is willing to accept.
In fact, one of the teacher's own mentality also needs to be changed, so does this situation need to be communicated?
Dear, a person's good attitude is positive and sunny, and he can always see the good side of things. People like to be close to positive sunshine, and they don't like to be in the company of pessimistic and depressed people. Who do you want to communicate with when you change your mentality?
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Strangled this unexpressed love in the bud, hid it in the depths of the heart, an unsightly place, and told yourself in your heart that you must say it out loud next time.
At such a time, this feeling, everyone has had it, and everyone has felt differently. Some love is not expressed, and there is a chance to make up for it next time, but many times, if it is not expressed this time, there will be no chance for next time. Although, there will be many tomorrows and next years in life, and there will be many next and next times, but for both the loved and the loved, perhaps every time is the last chance.
When the person we love leaves us early, when the person we love throws into the arms of others, when the person we value cuts off from us because of a misunderstanding, when the person we love no longer hears our voice and doesn't need our love, we will sigh in our hearts for the love that has not been expressed again and again. At this time, how do we need to talk about love?
There are some things that you have to say as soon as you think of them; There are some things that you have to do as soon as you think of them. If you have love in your heart, you must speak it quickly.
It's true. You have to be brave to confess to him, don't let yourself regret your life because you don't dare, if you like him, you have to pursue him bravely, tell him, so that even if he doesn't like you, you won't regret it, because after all, you have been brave to pursue ......
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