When people reach old age, why don t they want to live with their children?

When people reach old age, why don't they want to live with their children?

Many people must have heard of why people will be separated from their children in their old age. In fact, this is mainly because the elderly may have a certain impact on the lives of their children, sometimes their views are inconsistent or their lifestyles and interests are completely different, so I think this is why many people choose to live separately from their children in old age. Therefore, many people are reluctant to live with their children in their old age.

Because of old age, if parents still live with their children, they will inevitably experience some inconsistencies in life, and sometimes they are prone to quarrels, and the relationship between daughter-in-law is not very good. Therefore, many elderly people are now reluctant to live with their children, but many still hope that their children will have more time to visit them.

At this time, what parents are not willing to be with their sons and daughters all day? Sometimes it's just because I'm afraid that some conflict will happen. Because when we grow up, if we still have conflicts with our parents, it will lead to a change in the perspective of many things.

And sometimes if you make your relationship with your children too stiff, you will also be very embarrassed. Therefore, there are many parents who will be separated from their children in their old age.

In fact, parents still hope that their children will go back to spend more time with them when they have time. Because when the elderly are old, the only people they miss may be their own children. Sometimes he doesn't want to live with us, maybe because he is afraid of conflicts in life, but he still wants to spend more time with them.

Even if it's a frequent call to the home, it's fine. It is also a good comfort and companionship for elderly parents. Maybe that's why it's changed.

Many parents don't want to be here now, too much trouble for their children, if they live together, there will inevitably be a lot of trouble in life, to bring their children, so they would rather live alone.

The living habits of children and the elderly are different, and the young people nowadays have a fast pace of life, and the general elderly cannot adapt to this fast-paced life.

When I get old, I can't beat or scold, so I want to live quietly, live with my children, and be tired of helping to take care of my children.

Because the rhythm of life of the elderly and the young people is completely different, there will be many conflicts together, so the elderly want to be free and do not want to live with their children.

When people reach old age, they often prefer to be quiet, and when they are with their children, there are many times when they seem particularly noisy, and they are not used to this lifestyle.

The next-door neighbor complained to my mother, saying that his children were disobedient and quarreled for no reason, saying that when the children were young, they still wanted to have children and daughters, and when they were old, they waited for happiness, and they didn't think that when their children grew up, they became adults, but they became enemies, and she cried that she didn't know what was wrong. Many parents will feel that they are full of children and grandchildren, and they are not only prosperous, but their relatives are in urgent trouble, and they can help each other, but they do not think about the family with many children, fairness is the most important, if they can't do a bowl of water, many children can only consume the original blessings.

For parents, it is a great relief for their children to be united and friendly, but they ignore that the impact of their parents' speech and behavior on their children is significant, and whether their children can unite or not has a great relationship with their parents. Although parents cannot be relied on for the quality of people's lives, there is no doubt that parents are the first teachers in their children's lives, and children's judgments and definitions of values usually come from the influence of parents. When children are thinking independently, and their personality traits and thoughts are not generated, they subconsciously trust their parents as a reference.

How siblings get along is based on their parents' teachings and how they treat their families. When a person is old, whether he can enjoy happiness does not depend on whether he has children, but not how many children he has. Rather, it depends on the children and not with them.

If the children do not get along, no matter how many children they have, they will not be blessed, and they will often be wronged. Aunt Cheng is a patient I met when I was working in the hospital, she has two sons and a daughter, I have seen her son, and the daughter happened together, several people met as if they were enemies, and they would greet the other party with the most ugly words, and always remind everyone that this is also the hospital outpatient clinic to calm down. After that, I slowly learned about why the three siblings became enemies, and they were inseparable from the students' parents

The axial force of parents causes children to centrifuge parents to educate their children, usually telling them that the family should be united, but many parents usually act differently, originally as a family, but the difference becomes their own people and others. Some people say that ten fingers have length, and it is inevitable that they will not be treated fairly. Remember, there's a difference between not being able to do it and not wanting to do it.

If you can't do it, you do your best, and if you don't want to do it, you should be positive from the beginning and intentionally make a difference. In reality, most parents' axial forces are all intentional, including students' subjective emotions.

Children who have been treated unfairly subconsciously feel that they and the other party are not all the way, not of the same grade. Expecting this kind of brother and sister unity is cruel to the unloved children, and a luxury to the favored children. Some people say that being a big brother and a sister should let the younger brother and sister be careful; If you are a daughter, you have to get married sooner or later, and you shouldn't worry so much.

However, in reality, even if the children who are not loved do not care, no matter how much they give, they will not get the attention and gratitude they deserve, and they are often insatiable, exploited and exploited as a matter of course.

Most of the discord between children is due to the uneven distribution of property between parents, the uneven care of parents for their children, and the lack of communication between children, and the lack of good communication and bond between parents, which leads to this phenomenon.

My personal opinion is: "The junior is unwilling to live with the old Huai Rough Zen people, and lead dust does not mean unfilial piety." ”

First of all, we need to understand the meaning of "filial piety". Filial piety means "loving one's parents," but it is not the same as requiring children to live with their parents. In today's society, with the development of economy and technology, people have more choices and freedom.

Some people may have to stay away from home for work, education, etc., or even migrate overseas. For these people, living with their parents is not convenient or possible.

Second, we need to take into account the aging of the population and changes in family structure. According to China's National Bureau of Statistics, as of 2020, the proportion of people aged 60 and over has increased, and this proportion will continue to increase over time. As a result, the growing group of older people is putting more pressure on family life.

At the same time, family structures are changing, such as a decrease in the number of nuclear families, which means that the roles and responsibilities between family members are also changing.

People have the impression that the life of the elderly living alone is lonely and helpless, and their life will be very difficult.

1. The relatives of the elderly who live alone will come to reunite with them regularly, bringing the warmth of family affection to the elderly living alone.

Although the elderly who live alone live alone, their relatives have not forgotten them. Relatives of the elderly will regularly visit the elderly who live alone, bringing them the warmth of family affection. For seniors who live alone, this will make their lives no longer feel lonely, but full of hope and joy.

This warmth of family affection is a very important help for the elderly who live alone.

2. The neighbors of the elderly who live alone will often come to take care of their lives.

As the saying goes, distant relatives are not as good as close neighbors. The care of the neighbors for the elderly who live alone is the biggest help in their lives. The neighbors of the elderly who live alone will often visit them, help them in life, and chat with each other, which will not only solve the difficulties of these elderly people living alone, but also provide spiritual comfort, so that the elderly who live alone no longer feel lonely in their lives.

3. The community and other relevant parties will often visit the elderly who live alone.

In addition to relatives and neighbors, the community and other relevant parties will also regularly visit the homes of the elderly who live alone and give them care and concern for their daily life. This will also make the elderly who live alone feel warm, and at the same time can get practical help and support in life, which for the elderly living alone, they will feel care and help from all aspects, although they live alone, but they can feel the care and help from all sides, and their lives will no longer be lonely.

Actually, I agree with this sentence very much.

Nowadays, young people and the older generation have many differences in thinking, from behavior, life, education have different ideas, the original life is different, if you live together for a long time, there will be a generation gap, sometimes there will even be contradictions and quarrels.

Sometimes the old people's ideas are different from those of young people, for example, in terms of educating children, they all say that they are next generation, and the old people are indeed sometimes too accustomed to children, listen to children in everything, and buy what children want, for fear that children will not be full, and buy a lot of snacks and drinks. In fact, they don't know that these habits are actually harmful to children.

Nowadays, the elderly confine their children at home, for fear of going out and bumping into them, and treat the children as flowers in the greenhouse, which not only does the child not get exercise, but also produces an introverted personality, unwilling to contact outsiders, and will bring harm to the physical and mental health of the child.

I have a girlfriend who is like that.

Her name is Xiaohong, she and her husband have been married for 2 years, and their child was born last year. Originally, this was a thing to be happy about, but in Xiaohong's opinion, she couldn't be happy, because she and her husband were very busy at work, and they would get off work very late every day, and the arrival of this child would not have time for them to take care of it.

In order to have the child taken care of, they decided to let the mother-in-law take care of the child, and the mother-in-law was of course very happy to take care of her own grandchildren. At first, it was fine, but slowly Xiaohong found that her mother-in-law covered the child with a big quilt all day long, and Xiaohong said to her mother-in-law: "Children can't always cover like this, especially boys, they will get angry."

But the mother-in-law said that the child is so young, if he catches a cold, it will not be good, and he has to go to the hospital, which has a lot of bacteria, so it is even worse for the child.

And I said that the child should go out more, get in touch with nature more, and breathe fresh air, but my mother-in-law said that there was a lot of dust outside, and I was afraid that the child would have an infectious disease or something.

Originally, my husband and I got off work late, and we didn't sleep enough every day, but my mother-in-law got up at 3 or 4 o'clock every day, and started to cook and clean up the house.

This is what my girlfriend has personally experienced, so I think that I should try not to live with the elderly, because I can't take care of both at all in terms of living habits, and if I really need to live with the elderly, I should also talk about my own living habits in advance, so as not to cause unnecessary trouble in the future.

Actually, I agree with this sentence, because it should be more troublesome to live with your children when you are old.

Agree, because it is very inconvenient for the elderly and their children to live together, and the living habits of the elderly and their children are not the same, if they live together, there will be many contradictions, and it will also affect the relationship between each other.

Agree, because the old man's thoughts and children's thoughts are different, if the old man and the child live together, there will be a lot of contradictions and conflicts, and there will be a lot of opinions together.