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Having friends of the opposite sex is always the reason why the other person is the most insecure. Maybe you're arrogant, maybe you have a very boy-like personality, so you have a lot of friends of the opposite sex, and everyone of the opposite sex wants to recognize you as a sister or be your best friend. But think about it from another perspective, even if you really don't have a relationship, you are really just simple friends, what will you think as your boyfriend, they are all men, they all know the psychology of boys, they all know how boys think, will they rest assured that you will go to a party with them?
So if you love your boyfriend, reduce your contact with them after the relationship, even if you have a good relationship with your friends before the relationship. If there's a date you can't shirk, bring your boyfriend to meet them.
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In fact, to sum up, it is nothing more than because of love, love will make a person start to be suspicious and start to care, possessiveness will increase, and he is reluctant to let others touch or worry about it. If your boyfriend is insecure about you, congratulations, you have found the person who loves you deeply, and only when someone loves you deeply will you worry about whether you will leave him. As a very simple example, when we were children, we were always very possessive of our own things, especially toys, even if others touched them.
In the same way, boys are possessive of girls. If you don't want your boyfriend to feel insecure about you, avoid these behaviors.
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If there is a contradiction, it must be resolved, and don't keep hiding it in your heart. What are your thoughts, what do you want him to do, and what changes will you make, have a long talk with your boyfriend, and the two of you will open up to each other and say whatever you want. Men don't like to guess what a woman is thinking and why she is angry, so you have to tell him.
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Boys actually need companionship too, although most of the time they always show a strong appearance, but there is also a vulnerable part of the heart. When you socialize more and more often, you spend less and less time with him, resulting in some psychological gaps in him. When you socialize frequently, your consumption will increase greatly, which is a lot of pressure for your boyfriend.
In this stressful and insecure situation, your boyfriend will become more and more suspicious of your love for him. Even if your social circle is all women, he is afraid that you will leave him.
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The most is communication, no matter what is discussed, even if it is a little thing to communicate, whether it is between boyfriend and girlfriend or husband and wife, the most important thing is trust and communication, don't guess because of a little thing, put trust aside, so it's easy to quarrel.
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Accompany him, and also, if the two of them say anything, the girl should not let him guess, because if he is extremely insecure, it will be easy to suspect.
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You and your boyfriend have three different views, which is the living habits of the two of you! It's different from the meaning of thought! I don't know how you two fell in love!
If you want to solve the problem, you have to change yourself! Everything goes at his pace, to put it bluntly, it is to lose yourself to meet him! If he loves you, he will tolerate you and not let you suffer a little grievance!
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According to what you said, you have a lot in common, you have to determine whether you like or love each other, you can have it at any time, love is going to marriage, I personally think that if it is a husband and wife, complement each other best!
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The boyfriend's insecurity must be because his girlfriend does not trust him enough, so at this time, he must accompany his boyfriend more to let him relax. When men mention their girlfriends to others, they always affectionately call their girlfriends "little masters", making heaven and earth, just not letting go of themselves, in fact, girls are not born like this, but they are insecure, and "doing" is just to make their boyfriends pay more attention to themselves. At the same time, it is not only girls who are insecure, but boys are also insecure from time to time.
Faced with such a situation, how should his girlfriend help him?
The only thing insecure people have in common is playing the lead role in the relationship, not because they don't love you, but because they are not secure enough to let go of themselves. He wants to get all your attention and wants you to get back to him right away at any time. Even if you have something important to do, nothing is more important than him, and this is the most obvious sign of a boy's insecurity.
Most boys who are insecure in love have this commonality, and the reason they do it is because they are worried about the gains and losses of their relationship, that you will give up on him, that you will give up on the relationship.
Not only are girls unsafe, but boys are also unsafe. Sometimes, he has to look at his phone to send you messages. If he's okay, he can talk to you.
If you can take the initiative to give him a message, it will be more enjoyable than winning the lottery. But if the other person does not reply to the message in time, or even pretends not to see the message he sent, the boy must be very anxious. He wants to find you right away and ask you what's going on.
At the end of the day, he is just standing in the position of the emotional weak and wants to get more love from you. But boys should understand that their sense of security depends on themselves, not on others. Even if the other person is your favorite girlfriend, you should understand that you don't always want to rely on her and that your sense of security should be given by yourself.
Those insecure boys are mostly lonely people who are unable to face loneliness alone. Many people have this feeling of loneliness, light or severe. People who are afraid of loneliness always want to be accompanied by someone, but everyone has their own life and their own things to do.
In the end, you are the only one left. If you want not to be lonely and cultivate your sense of security, you must have the courage to face loneliness alone and not allow yourself to get into a relationship. When your eyes can only adapt to each other, you don't think of anything else.
You have other things to do besides love, cultivate your hobbies, make new friends, enjoy quiet tea time, play a game of ball with friends, watch a movie. When you are happy, you will find that you are not insecure.
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This is a relationship between the two of you, you can communicate more with him, let him understand you more, care more about you, and love you more, so that your relationship can be better. You can also ask him to see a psychiatrist and see what the psychiatrist has to say. So that you can solve the problem better.
You can also let him go out and play with his friends more often to relax him. That way your relationship will be better.
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You have to give your boyfriend enough security, be very nice to your boyfriend when you get along, give your boyfriend some surprises, and keep a certain distance from other members of the opposite sex around you, so that you can help your boyfriend.
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Be sure to strengthen communication, let the other party understand your true thoughts, don't be impulsive when you encounter anything, and focus on communication.
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1. Understanding and tolerance
A person is suspicious of you because he cares too much, because he cares about your existence and your loss, so he has a suspicious psychology towards you, and even makes himself feel insecure. If you love him, you have to tolerate him, understand him, and at the same time feel happy and happy that you have this love. Isn't there such a saying, I wish to get - people's hearts are not separated.
2. Considerate and understanding
Everyone's personality is different, some people are more emotionally invested, and some people will put their energy into study, work, or other aspects. When a person likes something, or a person, to the point of obsession, he will be completely immersed in it. If both of you are emotional people at the same time, I am afraid that he will be relatively less suspicious, and you will not be unacceptable.
3. Give him self-confidence
An insecure person lacks self-confidence to a large extent, especially in front of you, your boyfriend will have a sense of self-shame and a sense of gain and loss, which leads to no confidence in you and insecurity about yourself, so you have to build up your boyfriend's self-confidence.
4. Review yourself
Ask yourself if you are busy with other things, socialize more, and spend less time with your boyfriend. If you are constantly with him and he is still suspicious and insecure, then he has a mental health problem.
5. Don't create a psychological distance
Two people should cultivate common interests and hobbies, if two people have different interests and different hobbies, they are bound to go their own way and do their own things, so there will be a psychological distance between the two parties. It is also normal for a person who loves you deeply to be suspicious and insecure.
6. Determine a solid foundation for love
If two people get along well and you love each other, you can consider going into both families and meeting both parents. In this way, although the two people are not married, they already have the psychological feeling of existing in both families, so the boyfriend's heart will be much more steady.
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I'm very confused now, I'm with him, I've narrowed down my circle of friends, I've lost my hobbies, and I'm becoming more and more dependent on him. I can't give up my interests and hobbies for him, otherwise I will still be very hurt after the breakup and can't find a reason to support it. Scumbag appraiser, help you identify all kinds of scumbags!
id:zhananjianding)
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Uh, how old is he? First of all, you have to let him believe that you will not leave, he will slowly understand and grow, the sense of security is too ethereal, and few people can give a person a complete sense of security, the sense of security actually comes from a strong heart, so you should start by letting him learn to be strong, and tell him that the road in the future is that he wants to protect you, then he must learn to be strong, learn to be independent, you don't look old, because you see each other less, so the relationship is in a very hot love, so you are afraid of losing, he may be a little inferior, always feel that he is not good enough, so I'm afraid that you will leave, the way to make a boy grow up quickly is to fall out of love, I hope you don't let him grow up in this way, and when you both grow up to get married, remember the journey of growing up with each other, you will love each other more, go on well.
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I don't think anything, everyone has a peaceful place in their hearts, if he feels that this can give him warmth and warmth, then it is up to him. You should care more about him and be a comforter in his life.
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How can you tell if your boyfriend is not feeling safe enough or if you are extremely insecure?
The sense of security can be given to oneself or taken from others. So how should you tell if your boyfriend doesn't have enough sense of security or because she is extremely insecure?
The first lack of intimacy is that you are insecure, and you would rather trouble yourself than others. Even in an intimate relationship, you don't exactly see the other person as your own, let alone believe in your place in the other person's heart. They rarely bother others, and as long as they can grit their teeth, they will be rejected even if the other person actively supports them.
There must be a sense of responsibility and responsibility in order to make a woman happy.
Second, choosing an inside-out seat is a lack of security. When entering the restaurant alone, you will always choose a seat that is closer to the inside and facing the door. A lot of the time, I don't have to worry about anything, but I feel more at ease when I choose a position like this.
Or choose a window position, as long as you can see people passing by, it is more reassuring. A boyfriend's sense of security comes from his boyfriend's thoughtfulness. Taking care of your boyfriend will take care of you, and you will feel safe.
Third, working hard to make money to support your family is the sense of security given by your boyfriend, giving you peace of mind, and a man who really loves you will work hard for you, create a better life for you, and work hard for you in the future. It is not just a matter of talking, but sincerely making you feel at ease and warm. The love that a woman wants is very simple, that is, the person she loves can live with her steadily, so that she is already very satisfied, and the man can bring this feeling, which is the true love for you.
Fourth, it is the sense of security given by your boyfriend to give you trust when you say it. For women, this is what women hate the most. So, a man who truly loves you will give you enough trust and promise that you will do what you do.
However, you trust him unreservedly. Such a sense of security can only be estimated by those who love you. If a man does not know how to bear in life, but only cares about fighting for himself, then such a man will never give you happiness.
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You can judge from the other party's attitude towards you, the state of the other party getting along with you, the feeling of respecting you and the other party, the frequency of your chat with the other party, and the number of times the other party takes the initiative to find you.
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In fact, you can think about whether your male friend is good to you in normal times, or if there are different changes in hunger, you can better distinguish it.
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Judging according to his life experience of Jian Jiansheng, as well as the problems he encountered in his life, and the way he got along with his boyfriend, he can understand the old situation of the love manuscript in terms of security.
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It should be judged from the state of two people getting along, the character of the other party, the character of the other party, and whether they are vexatious in the relationship.
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