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Most of the people who talk about unfortunate things are egocentric, and only self-centered people often recount their unfortunate experiences and experiences.
In one, there is a British six-member comedy troupe, and they starred in a comedy called "Monty Python in Hollywood", in which four rich gentlemen take turns to tell about their poor and miserable lives when they were young, which is very funny. Gentleman A said, the roof of my house used to be leaky, Gentleman B said, there are 26 people living in my very small house, Gentleman C said, you wait, I used to sleep in the corridor, Gentleman D said, I was so envious of being able to sleep in the corridor at that time, Gentleman E said, what is that? My family used to spread a tarp on the floor as a bed.
They worked harder than anyone else in their youth, and why did they say anything? Worse than whom? Some people tell their misfortunes to show that they are different, but in fact, they want to satisfy their desire to show themselves.
Sometimes telling others about your unfortunate experience may have a good effect, first of all, if you confide in your friends, you may reduce your psychological pressure, and with the help of your friends, you can objectively examine your own experience, get rid of sadness as soon as possible, maintain mental health, and be able to ** your own experience, and it is possible to shorten the psychological distance between each other, which helps to establish a good interpersonal relationship, and you are called self-exposure in psychology, and the more you expose yourself, the more conducive to getting closer to interpersonal relationships. <>
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Most people avoid unfortunate things, but some people talk about it every day, the most typical is Lu Xun's Xianglin sister-in-law, she almost everyone talks about their painful past. Why do these people do this? In my opinion, they do this for several reasons:
They need it to gain the attention and sympathy of others.
Xianglin's sister-in-law is such a person, she is too unappreciated in life, too little sense of existence, and no one understands her pain and no one cares. When she found that others were interested in her painful experience, she instinctively developed a way of communicating "complaining". At the end of the day, the fundamental purpose of all forms of communication is to connect with others in order to gain understanding and energy.
Xianglin's sister-in-law "trafficked" her own painful experiences in exchange for the attention and sympathy of others, although this method became less and less effective, she still could not give up, because it was almost the only way she could use it.
They need to prove themselves right by that.
There are people who keep telling their own misery, and in what they say, you will feel that he is a victim of a terrible, unjust fate or a ruthless, indifferent other, and it is because of external reasons that he has fallen into such a miserable situation. But in fact, if we dig deeper, we may find that they are not so completely innocent. They used their own tragic experience to weaken their responsibility in the incident and prove their correctness, so that they could make their hearts better.
They need to use this to control others.
If the person who adopts the second way is still passively defensive, then the third type of person is the one who uses his own tragic experience as an active attack. When they portray themselves as victims, others who enter this "field" will subtly feel the logic: "I am very pitiful, a helpless victim, and I need you to do what I want and help me fulfill my wishes."
Some people who are willing to take the initiative, or who are easily aroused by pity and guilt in their hearts, will agree with his logic and begin to interact with him in this way. But often such relationships don't last long, because no one can afford the life of another person, and those who want to rely on others will inevitably end up disappointed – others will not always be as obedient as we would like them to be.
So, unfortunate people do need help, but we should realize that sometimes, they don't need help that is obvious. <>
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One day, Xiao Ming said very depressedly: "I fell a big heel this morning and broke my knee", but his friend Xiao Wang put on a relatively high appearance and said, "What is that!"
I once rolled down the stairs." Have you ever seen someone in your life who is less fortunate than others? Ever wondered what the reason for this is?
Talking to friends about your misfortunes can sometimes play a positive role in reducing your psychological pressure, and you can also objectively examine your own experiences with the help of your friends, so as to get rid of negative emotions as soon as possible, so as to maintain your mental health. In addition, sometimes taking appropriate ** one's own experiences or troubles can also shorten the psychological distance between each other and help establish good interpersonal relationships.
But the number of file guesses, everything should have a degree. If you always talk about your unfortunate experiences or bad luck, and you are happy to do it, and even have a proud look, it is a sign of too much self-expression. Because it is a manifestation of wanting to attract the attention of others and arouse the concern of others.
This kind of person is just like the person who constantly complains regardless of the feelings of others, he is an egocentr, a self-pitiful type, but perhaps he himself does not realize how unfortunate it is to be the first to act.
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Summary. 1.People who always talk about why they are more thoughtful, like to get to the bottom of everything, and generally have a strong sense of responsibility.
2.Among them, there are some more intelligent people, there is a spirit of not abandoning and not giving up, facing their own questions, often asking others, or to consult information, in short, must figure it out, this kind of people tend to be more prominent in learning, especially theoretical things.
People who always talk about why.
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1.People who always talk about why they are more thoughtful, like to get to the bottom of everything, and generally have a strong sense of responsibility. 2.
Among them, there are some more intelligent people, there is a spirit of not abandoning and not giving up, facing their own questions, often ask others, or to consult information, in short, we must make it clear that Qin Yuanbai, this kind of people tend to be more prominent in learning, especially theoretical things.
3.But this kind of person may cause a small number of people to be disgusted, because some people don't like to be asked too much why. 4.When the tease spine, most people still appreciate it and admire his spirit of striving for excellence.
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