Ask for a psychotic joke new Psycho Hospital joke story

Joke stories about psychiatric hospitals.

Humorous jokes are actually the conciliator of life, and when we see something that interests us and can't help laughing, we will raise the corners of our mouths, and this is the charm of jokes. Here are some jokes and stories about mental hospitals that I bring to you for your reference.

There was a patient who came to the psychiatrist:

Patient: I've always felt like I'm a bird.

Doctor: Oh, that's serious. Since when?

Patient: From when I was a bird.

A doctor at a neurological hospital asked a patient: What would happen if I cut off one of your ears?

The Patient: Then I won't be able to hear it.

The doctor listened: Uh-huh, it's normal.

The doctor asked, "What would happen if I cut off your other ear again?"

The Patient: Then I won't see it.

The doctor began to get nervous: how could he not see it?

Patient: Because the glasses will fall off.

There is an old lady in the neurological hospital, who wears black clothes and holds a black umbrella every day, squatting at the entrance of the neurological hospital.

The doctor thought: to heal her, you must start by understanding her.

So the doctor also wore black clothes and carried a black umbrella, and squatted there with her.

The two squatted silently for a month.

The old lady finally spoke to the doctor: May I ask, are you also a shiitake mushroom?

One day, it rained. Many people in the psychiatric hospital took towels and soaps to bathe in the rain, and only one person watched jokes alone on the windowsill.

The dean happily asked, "Why don't you go?" ”

The neurological patient said, "Those fools are stupid, I'll wait until the water is hot!" ”

A former physics teacher'A mentally ill person was heating a bottle of water with a lighter, and the doctor saw it and asked, "What are you doing?" ”

I'm doing an experiment," said the psycho smugly, "think about it, if the upper layer of the sea is ice water and the lower layer is hot water, then there will be a temperature difference between the cold water and the hot water, and the submarine will be able to sail without using any energy as long as it is in this temperature difference." ”

The doctor asked curiously, "Then how do you make the upper layer of the sea water cold water and the lower layer hot water?" ”

That's the kind of problem I'm going to leave to humanity! ”

In the corridor of the psychiatric hospital, Patient A said to a patient holding a duck, "Dude, why did you take such a thin dog out for a walk?" ”

The duck patient smiled and replied, "Are you insane?" See clearly: this is a duck, not a dog. ”

Patient A said contemptuously, "You're just crazy, and I didn't ask you, I asked about ducks." ”

It is said that two mentally ill people managed to escape from the psychiatric hospital.

But you have to climb over 100 walls to get to the road.

They climbed 60 walls together, and one of them asked the other, "Are you tired, man?"

The other said not to be tired.

He said, "It's not tiring, let's go on."

When he reached the 99th wall, one of the spirits asked another of them, "Brother, are you tired?"

Another way: I'm tired! Let's go back!

So they flipped back again.

One day, in a certain nerve series ward, there was a neurological patient singing, the dean saw it, the patient immediately turned over, the dean hurriedly asked why, only to see the patient say: "Stupid, after singing on side A, sing side B!" ”

One day a psychotic cried out, "I am the master of the world, and you must all listen to me." The doctor asked, "Who said that?" The patient replied, "God said," and one of the patients cried out, "I didn't say that." ”

The new director of the asylum walks up to a patient and asks him why he got into the asylum.

Doctor, that's right. I married a widow with an adult daughter. My father married her daughter, so my wife became her father-in-law's mother-in-law, and her daughter became my stepdaughter and stepmother.

My stepmother gave birth to a son, who became my brother and my wife's grandson. I also had a son, who became his grandfather's brother-in-law, and his own uncle's uncle. On the other hand, when my father mentions his grandson, he says that it is his brother-in-law, and my son calls his sister a grandmother.

I now think that I am my mother's father, my grandson's brother, and my wife is her son-in-law's daughter and her grandson's sister. Now I don't know if I'm my own grandfather, my brother's father, or my son's nephew, because my son is my father's brother-in-law. That's why I'm here, Dean.

I feel calmer here than at home. 」