Ten humorous rules Today, I saw the teacher call Mom for some reason

Confucius said, "Isn't it also happy to learn knowledge and then review it at a certain time?" ”

Zeng Tzu said: "I reflect on myself many times a day: Do you do your best to do things for others? Is it honest to associate with friends? Have you reviewed the studies taught by the teacher? ”

Confucius said: "After reviewing knowledge, you can have new experiences and discoveries, and you can become a teacher." ”

Confucius said, "If you only read books without thinking, you will be confused and gain nothing, and if you only dream but do not read, you will be in danger." ”

Confucius said, "Teach you the attitude of knowing and not knowing!" To know is to know, not to know is not to know – this is wisdom and wisdom. ”

Confucius said: "When you see a virtuous person, you should think of being on par with him, and when you see an unvirtuous person, you should reflect on whether you are like him." ”

Confucius said, "When several people walk together, there must be my teacher among them, and I will choose their strengths to learn, and their shortcomings must be corrected." ”

Zeng Tzu said: "Scholars must not be broad-minded and strong-willed, because they have a great mission and a long way to go. Isn't it also important to regard the ideal of "benevolence" as one's mission? Isn't it far away until death? ”

Confucius said: "When I encountered a cold winter, I knew that the pine and cypress trees shed their leaves after drinking." ”

Zigong asked, "Is there a word that can be practiced for the rest of your life?" Confucius said, "That's probably 'Forgiveness'!" Don't inflict on others what you hate. ”

There was a beautiful woman who got off the night shift and was followed by a lecherous man, and the beautiful woman was very scared, and it happened to be a cemetery, and the lascivious man was about to start, and the beautiful woman walked to a grave and said, "Daddy, open the door, I'm back." The frightened lecherous man ran away.

The beautiful woman laughed proudly at her cleverness, but before the laughter fell, an eerie voice came from the grave and said, "Girl, why have you forgotten to bring your key again?" Frightened, the beauty screamed and ran away.

At this time, a grave robber crawled out of the grave and said, "It affects my work and scares you to death". Suddenly found an old man in front of the tombstone, holding a chisel to carve the tombstone, so he asked curiously:

What are you doing"? The old man said angrily: "These unscrupulous descendants have carved my tombstone wrongly, so I have to change it myself."

When the tomb robbers heard this, they were so frightened that they ran away. Looking at the back of the tomb robber, the old man sneered: "Robbing business with Lao Tzu will scare you to death."

Accidentally, the chisel fell to the ground, and the old man was about to bend down to pick it up, but he saw a hand stretched out from the grass, and at the same time there was a cold voice: "Ah, dare to change the house number of my house." The old man was so frightened that he ran off the ground.

A scavenger crawled out of the grass, picked up a chisel on the ground, and exclaimed, "In these days, it takes so much effort to pick up a piece of rotten iron." ”

It is said that once Zhuge Liang, Liu Bei, Sun Quan, and Cao Cao were on the same plane, and suddenly encountered an emergency and needed to parachute to escape. Only then did it turn out that there were only three parachute bags left on board. Everyone was nervous for a while, and then I saw Zhuge Liang shaking his feather fan to clear his throat and say:

In this way, if the mountain man asks a few questions, and if he can answer them, he will parachute, and if he can't answer them, he will have to jump down by himself." The others had no choice but to agree. Zhuge Liang shook the feather fan again and asked Liu Bei:

So I took an umbrella bag and went down. Zhuge Liang asked Sun Quan again: "How many moons are there in the sky?"

Unexpectedly, he jumped into the sea and picked up a life. Cao Cao secretly rejoiced. The second time four people encountered an emergency on the plane, the four of them discussed, yes, it's still the old way.

Battle of Makino. Zhuge Liang nodded, so Liu Bei took an umbrella bag and went down. Zhuge Liang asked Sun Quan again:

How many people died in that battle? Sun Quan thought for a while and said, "There are about thirty or forty thousand."

Zhuge nodded, Sun Quan took an umbrella bag and went down, Cao Cao couldn't help but snickered and thought: "Zhuge Liang, Zhuge Liang, I am through the past and the present, especially in the military, this time you are planted, hehe!" I saw Zhuge Liang asking

What are they called? Cao Cao almost fainted when he heard this, so he had to jump off by himself. Unexpectedly, he jumped into the sea again and picked up a life.

Cao Cao laughed secretly: "MD, Lao Tzu's life is big, see what you Zhuge old man can do with me?!" "The third time the same four people took the plane, and the plane encountered an emergency, Cao Cao thought about it, the old man Zhuge wanted to fix me again, so I just jumped down and forgot it myself, so as not to be insulted.

So he jumped down and descended at high speed in the air. I could only hear Zhuge Liang's laughter above: "Cao Cao, Cao Cao, you are smart for a lifetime, haha, there are four parachutes on the plane today!"

Cao Cao: "Ah--- fainted.

Two neuropathic patients want to escape from the neurological hospital. One night, they escaped from the hospital and found 100 walls in front of them, 99 of which they had climbed. A said:

I'm tired, let's go back to sleep! He said, "Wow, I'm tired too!"

After saying that, they climbed over another 99 walls and climbed back.

The landlord chooses me!

Landlord, you said no, so how can you do it? Wipe! チ

I'll be verbose, you can write and practice by yourself, although it is nine years of compulsory education, you can't mix it. If you don't like to hear it, forget it.