What do young people who don t want to live with the elderly and ask the elderly to help with their

This problem, our daughter-in-law in Hubei, has solved it very well.

One is rich, so he spends his own money to find a nanny.

It is a very normal thing for a daughter-in-law to be reluctant to live with her parents-in-law, but when a child is born and she has a job to do, the best way may be to find a nanny if she has a high salary.

My neighbor's sister is a child who brought her to 1 year old by herself, and spent more than 10,000 yuan a month to find a live-in nanny.

Although I was worried that the nanny would not be as good as the family at the beginning, but under normal circumstances, the nanny who spent 10,000 yuan to hire is actually quite high-quality, especially now that the house is equipped with monitoring everywhere, in fact, she is not worried that the nanny will not be able to take the child well.

The second one has no money, so he will find his own mother to bring it.

If it is said that hiring a nanny needs to be paid according to the market, then you don't need to give so much money to invite your own mother.

And this is also the most common practice in rural Hubei today, the daughter-in-law has a child, if you don't want the mother-in-law to take it, let the mother-in-law pay for it, and ask the daughter-in-law's own mother to take the child.

Generally, 3,000 to 4,000 a month is enough.

That is, almost 40,000 yuan a year.

One of the advantages of this is that it will not cause conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is recommended to refer to it, of course, there is also a problem that today's elderly people are not willing to take children, and they are willing to spend money to hire someone to bring them, so it depends on the character!

The third personal suggestion is that it is better for the mother to take the child herself.

Many parents feel that it is more important for them to make money, but in fact, for their children, the companionship of childhood and the parent-child education of childhood are actually the most important.

And we can clearly see that the children taken care of by their parents are a little higher than the children brought up by the elderly, both in terms of IQ and EQ.

Of course, the most important point is to raise a promising child, and the child's monthly income may be able to top your lifetime's income in the future.

So if you can't make a choice between spending time with your children and making money, it's better to think about what you really need!

Work is only a part of life, and raising children can be the whole of life, the above, is my little point of view, welcome to correct!

Maybe I think there will be more contradictions and frictions when I live with the elderly, so I like to live separately from them, but I have to be busy with work or something, and I don't have time to take care of the children, so I can only trouble the elderly.

If you don't live together, you can avoid a lot of unnecessary conflicts and troubles, and you can also have more private space. But when I take care of children, I always feel that the old man will do better than me, so I give the child to them.

How to say it, it is said that living with the mother-in-law is prone to contradictions, far fragrant and smelly, when I got married, I said that I would not live with my mother-in-law, and my mother-in-law also agreed, and I married and visited it every New Year's holiday, and the old man had no opinion, and there was never a big contradiction, as for the children, it was not easy to live outside, the mother-in-law liked her grandson, and she had no time to take the child, so it was better to hand over the son to the mother-in-law than to hire an unfamiliar nanny, but the mother-in-law was also hard to take the child, and the monthly living expenses must not be less!

I don't want to live together because I just want to avoid a lot of trouble, so I can live separately, but I really don't have much energy and time to take care of children, so it's all handed over to the elderly, and it's really hard for them.

The daughter-in-law is reluctant to live with her mother-in-law, more for the sake of family harmony, the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law always have countless contradictions, but if they are far away, it is not a big deal, as for why the child should pay a mother-in-law, on the one hand, the mother-in-law is happy, on the other hand, she also hopes to have time to earn more money outside!

My mother-in-law is the most picky, I am a princess at home, and when I get married, I am like a nanny, and it is easy to be lazy, so I can go out to live naturally not to live with my mother-in-law, even if my mother-in-law can help with a lot of places, but my mother-in-law is not a mother, and I have to help my mother-in-law do everything, and I guess I have a lot of opinions afterwards! As for handing over the child to my mother-in-law, as long as my mother-in-law is willing, I am quite willing, of course I am not happy to bring it myself, just a little harder!

Living together, I feel that my two-person world and private life are disturbed, and the old people are not used to living in the city, so they like to live separately. But in terms of taking care of children, the old people are still more experienced and enthusiastic.

Because living with the elderly will inevitably cause a lot of conflicts due to various differences in concepts, so I can avoid it, but I think the elderly are more experienced in taking care of children, so I can rest assured that they will take it.

I can't understand what these people think, I think that since I need my in-laws to take care of my children, it's better to live together, otherwise it's too troublesome to pick up and drop off the children back and forth.

Mainly because there will be a lot of conflicts when living together, and my mother-in-law doesn't like me very much, so she will always quarrel. My husband is very difficult, but the old people are really good to the children, so they are willing to let them take it.

Perhaps in the subconscious of many people, they will feel that it is a natural thing for the elderly to help take care of children, after all, young people have their own jobs to be busy, and they can't give up their jobs because they have children, and most of the parents have retired at home, and it is normal to help take care of children in their spare time, but I don't know when it began, young people began to reject the elderly with babies. <>

Of course, I also know that there are many elderly people who are not willing to help their children to take care of their children, after all, the life after retirement is colorful, if you want to take your children around the children every day, you will be very tired without your own time, and maybe you will be left complaining, so they would rather pay for a nanny than take care of the children themselves. This coincides with the ideas of young people. Next, I will talk about the reasons why young people are reluctant to help the elderly take care of their children.

First, the parenting philosophy of the elderly is different from that of young people. The vast majority of young people are reluctant to help the elderly take care of their children because there is a certain difference between young people and the elderly in the concept of educating children, you must know that today's children have been pampered since childhood, and young people have read relevant educational books and know what kind of education method is the best for children; But the older generation is relying on their own experience to bring up children, some ideas are relatively backward, should be eliminated, young people do not want the elderly to use such a bad educational concept to educate their children, for fear that the children will become bad in such an environment, so the help of the elderly is very repulsive. <>

Second, I don't want the elderly to work too hard. There are also some young people who don't want the elderly to help Another factor is that they don't want the elderly to work too hard, after all, taking children is a chore, people who have taken children know that they are really tired, after all, the old people are not young, and their bodies are getting worse, and long-term hard work is very unfavorable to the body of the elderly, and it is understandable that the elderly are not allowed to take children for the sake of the health of the elderly.

This is due to the fact that there are general differences in the lifestyles of young and old people, and most young people also approve of the way older people are educated.

To a certain extent, because young people generally have a higher level of education than the elderly, when it comes to educating their children, many young people will be more inclined to take care of their own children unless they are very busy with their work. In real life, the situation of the elderly helping young people to take care of their children will also lead to family conflicts, although many elderly people are very willing to help their children take care of their children, but the children will also take into account the harmony of a family. <>

Young people generally do not approve of the way older people are educated.

This principle is actually very simple, because the elderly are basically doting when they take care of their children, and many elderly people do not know how to educate their children in the right way. In this case, as long as the young people themselves have the corresponding financial strength, young people will choose to take care of their own children, which can also help children to get a healthier way of growth. <>

There are also differences in the lifestyles of young and old.

In addition to the educational ability of the elderly themselves, because there is a big difference in the lifestyles of young people and the elderly, many young people will be very uncomfortable with the old people around them and often nag themselves, and the elderly do not recognize the lifestyle of young people, so the two together will only lead to more contradictions. At the age of 1 to 3 years old, there are families where older people may help younger people with children. However, when children are three years old, many young people will choose to take care of their children alone, and at the same time, they will try to avoid contact with the elderly around them.

In my personal opinion, because the elderly have a wealth of life experience, the elderly will also have relevant advantages when it comes to raising children. For most ordinary families, if the elderly are willing to help the young take care of their children, this situation can definitely help the young people reduce a lot of family burdens, but it is better for young people not to share the responsibility of educating children with the elderly.

Because many elderly people, their concepts are still stuck in the past. Most of today's young people have received a higher education, so they prefer to take care of their babies themselves.

Because of the stubborn thinking of the elderly, some of the practices they think are good for their children have actually caused harm to their children.

Why are more and more elderly people reluctant to help with their babies? It's nothing more than these reasons, very realistic.

It's hard work to take care of children and educate them.

Now the social pressure is too great, and the money that couples earn every month at work is almost not much left except for daily expenses. At this time, taking care of children at home must have added another heavy burden to the original life. At this time, if someone helps with the child, it can relieve a lot of stress.

Children's grandparents are the most suitable candidates for taking care of children, but if you look closely, you will find that the elderly are not very willing to take children. Why are the elderly now reluctant to take care of children?

First, there is a conflict of parenting concepts

The generation of the old people raised children and thought that it was enough to raise children. It is enough to eat and clothe yourself. But now the family has raised their children as babies, and they pay attention to various parenting methods, food, use, etc.

However, the concept of parenting of the elderly is still at the level of the past, so there are often conflicts between young parents and the elderly over child-rearing issues. Many mothers have a good relationship with their mother-in-law before giving birth. Because there isn't much intersection.

However, after giving birth, there is a marked increase in the number of conflicts. On the one hand, there is the dissatisfaction of young parents, and on the other hand, the thankless work of the elderly, so many elderly people do not want to take their children either.

Second, physical reasons

After all, when the elderly are old, there will always be some diseases on their bodies, their physical fitness is poor, and they can't bear the hard work of taking care of children. Anyone who raises a child knows that it is not easy to raise a child, it is both strenuous and brain-draining. Even if some elderly people want to help with their children, they are not enough.

Third, the elderly are not hard of hearing

Generally, when the elderly reach the age of age, their hearing will decline to a certain extent. If the elderly person with a child is particularly poor in hearing and the child does not receive a response when talking to the elderly, tell the elderly out loud. This can easily lead children to develop the habit of speaking loudly.

In other words, if you don't get a response, your self-esteem will be frustrated, and you will start to avoid speaking. Or every time you shout, it's a tantrum. In addition, when listening to the radio or watching TV, this kind of elderly people need to adjust the sound loudly in order to hear the sound, so it is easy to weaken the hearing after staying next to the elderly for a long time.

Because the old people nowadays feel that taking care of children will be particularly tiring, and the old people nowadays feel that such things are thankless, and they are afraid of teaching their grandchildren badly.

It's because there are a lot of things that happen when taking care of children, and the elderly are not easy to move, so they are reluctant to take children.

Because it is very tiring to carry small children. After the elderly take care of the children, the young people will also complain that the children brought by the old people are not good. It takes a lot of energy to take care of children, so many elderly people are reluctant to take children.

Because it is very difficult to bring children nowadays, there will always be various problems, and in the case of injury, the elderly cannot bear the responsibility.

This is because there are many elderly people who like freedom very much and want to travel.

No one with children solves the following:

1. If there is no one to take care of the children, you can resign and stay at home, and take care of the children full-time in the hall.

As a mother, there are many advantages to bringing her own children, which can deepen the relationship and feelings between the mother and the child, and taking the child by herself is also the most cautious. Mothers take care of their children in person, so that children have more sense of security and satisfaction. From the perspective of parenting, it is a very good choice to take care of your own children.

2. You can ask for a babysitter.

The mother-in-law belt and the nanny belt are the same. It's nothing more than spending more. As for the money, it may not matter, because you want to be psychologically satisfied and don't want to live with your mother-in-law, so finding a nanny is also a good choice.

3. If you don't want to live with your mother-in-law, you can live with your mother. You can let the mother help take care of the child, grandma and grandma are the same. This way, I won't worry about it, I don't want to live with my mother-in-law.

Another advantage of mothers helping to take care of children is that mothers and daughters are still very familiar with each other, and they can tolerate each other if they have any problems.

Precautions with children.

The first thing you need to pay attention to when taking a baby is the safety of the baby, the baby does not have much so-called danger awareness, but they are full of curiosity and exploration of everything around them, parents are not careful to let the baby fall into unknown danger.

Therefore, the safety of the baby is the primary issue, pay attention to the baby, do not let the baby out of their sight, at home also need to pay attention to electrical appliances, knives, hot water, stairs, balconies and other dangerous places of safety protection measures.